You're My Only Cure

Elise was sitting at her desk and drawing. She was mad and disappointed. She was also sick and tired of this situation, of...her marriage. It’s funny how being disappointed and let down exhausted her so much emotionally.

They had been married for almost 5 years. They always were happy, actually, they couldn't ask for more from their life. When she met him she knew they were soul mates. She just connected with him more than anyone else and she just knew it wasn't typical thing. They understood each other perfectly. Sometimes, they only needed to look at each other to know they were thinking about the same thing. They just knew. Without any words.

For the first two years his fans didn't even know that John was taken. Elise was okay with all of this: not holding hands when they were around fans, zero affection, using the back door, or returning to the tour bus before the fans come out of the hall, where there was a show. And when they found out she freaked out. But his fans were truly amazing. And she was fine with the fact they wanted to get to know her. She was also fine with his job. She was an artist and she understood making music, recording albums, touring around the world. She understood his passion. And he always supported her.

She felt loved. She liked the way she felt when he looked at her. Like she wanted believe in herself. And she did. They spent long hours in her atelier when she was trying to find inspiration or trying to work, but she couldn't concentrate. He made her laugh; talking about his day, talking about their future, or they simply made love.

One thing.

Them against the world.

But John had changed so much...

She heard him walking into the apartment and looked at the watch. It was almost midnight. She sighed, feeling his arms around her and his lips on her neck.

"I'm sorry" John whispered, moving his lips to her ear. "I'm sorry" he repeated, but again she ignored him. "Elise, I-I'm really sorry" he grabbed her by her arms and turned around so he could look into her eyes.

"For what, John?" he heard bitter sound of her voice. She was disappointed.

"Babe, don't be like that. It was just a dinner at your parents" he murmured, sighing. She raised her eyebrows, crossing her arms.

"Just a dinner? You....idiot! It was their anniversary dinner. There was my whole family, friends...my fucking happy sister with her fucking perfect husband..."

"W-what?! Are you saying you 're not happy because of...me?" he asked. "It's ridiculous!"

"It's not, John. You've been acting like this for a few weeks or even months. I really understand you're recording new album, you have to spend long hours in the studio, but... John, I'm your wife. And I'm feel like I'm losing a contest I didn't even enter."

"What the fuck... Elise, you did enter it, but that's not a contest! It's my job, my passion, my life" he almost yelled at her. How could she say those thing about him?

"Where in your life is a place for me, hm? Because I don't really know. We haven't had sex for ages, you even spent my birthday with guys, making music. And I only wanted to go to the cinema with you. So much to ask, huh? And you forgot about Valentine's Day..."

"Because it's a silly day? You said it by yourself. I'm sorry I didn't buy you flowers and other stupid things, like cards and pearls."

"I didn't need those things, John. I only wanted to spend some time with you. Not because it was Valentine's Day. But because you didn't give a shit about me. You...haven't for so long. And today my family and friends were like: where's John? Why he's not here with you? Are you not together anymore? And I just stood there, trying to smile and deny, explaining that you're just busy. But what if you're not?"

"Of course I'm busy, babe, do you think that I did it on purpose?" his eyebrows furrowed.

"No. But what if your "busyness" is not the only thing? What if you really don't give a shit about me anymore?"

"Elise Roxanne, what the hell are you talking about?" he gasped.

"I've barely seen you for the past two weeks. Do you even know what's going on with my life? How can I discuss important things with my husband when he's never home?"

"Yeah? So what important did happen, huh? Did you not sell one of your paintings?" he asked with sarcasm. It made her heart twist into a knot. Her face fell and she stepped back.

"I-I lost one of my contracts" she mumbled, looking at him.

John immediately felt bad. He always supported her as much as she did it for him. Even during their fights, they never drifted too far away from the line that they had drawn between them. They never fought about their jobs. This fight felt different. Like they weren't even on the same playing field. There was no line, no boundaries. They were both just floating around aimlessly.

He finally closed some of the space between them by stepping closer to her. And as much she wanted him to hug her, she couldn't ignore this feeling. The awkward heartbeat was starting to become painful. Elise stepped back.

"I'm gonna take a bath and reevaluated my life" she sighed and quickly went to the bathroom, not letting him say more.