Fifty-Two

Louis and Zayn were knocking on the door five minutes early. Kim and I were still working on our make-up, praying they would be slightly late. I swiped on a thin layer of peach lip gloss and opened the door. “Evening, gentlemen.”

“Hi.” They said in unison. Louis turned to me and kissed my cheek. “Zayn’s very anxious, he’s never been on a blind date.”

“How cute.” I wrinkled my nose at the boy as he rolled his eyes, scanning the room for my best friend. “Don’t worry, she’s a total pig and you’d hate her.” Zayn laughed slightly, Louis smiled and wrapped his arm around me.

Kimmy came down a few minutes later and set her eyes on her date. She was dressed in a pair of black skinny jeans, a pink lace top and a black blazer. Zayn licked his lip and smiled as he greeted her. “Best looking pig I’ve ever seen.” Kim gave him a weird look then glanced at me knowing my sarcastic side had emerged.

“Okay, ladies.” Louis spoke up after a moment of silence. “Tonight is all about adventure.”

“You didn’t plan anything, did you?” I asked. He shook his head. “This is why guys need us.” I said to Kim as we opened our purses. “Charity basketball game.” I handed him the flyer and smiled as he nodded slowly, reading the paper over. “I would be playing if I weren’t sick all the time. But a few people I met in a group are playing and it would be great to see them again.”

Louis pocketed the flyer, “Okay, sounds like fun.” He extended his hand towards me and placed the other one behind his back. “M’lady, would you care to accompany me to a basketball game?” I grabbed his hand and nodded. “To the carriage!”

Zayn had offered his hand to Kimmy as well, she took it without hesitation and locked up as we gathered into the car. I sat in front with Louis and gave him directions to the hospital.

When we arrived, a few people were already talking to me. Louis politely stood aside and waited for me to introduce him. My doctor smiled and started asking questions about his accent. We were slowly walking to the gym when I saw Dex.

The thing was, if it were anywhere else, I would have just ignored him, I wouldn’t have given him another thought. But he was at a game I was meant to play and he was laughing with one of the other players. He was playing a dirty game.

I didn’t talk to him, but it bothered me. He was the one who dumped me because he couldn’t handle that I was dying and that I didn’t give myself to him completely. He was my last ex and I felt foolish as I watched his game play out in front of me. He used all the same moves on me.

Louis was still talking to my doctor when we sat down. Zayn and Kim were grabbing some drinks at a booth at the side of the small gym. I turned my attention from Dex and looked at Louis. “I’m more of a football man, myself.”

“Forgive me, this probably sounds stupid, but you mean soccer right?” Louis laughed and nodded to Dr. Tierney. “I personally like hockey. Nothing like a good fight in the middle of a game.” The guys laughed. “So, Lydia, has everything been okay this week?”

“Yes, I got a little sick last night, but I kept down the Chinese after.”

He gave me that questioning look that made me cringe. “We’ve talked about this, you can’t go eating that kind of food when you get sick.” He didn’t continue to lecture me, because he knew I wouldn’t listen and I would go right ahead and eat it no matter what. “Are you considering chemo again?”

“No, we’ve talked about this, Dave.” I gave him the same tone he just gave me. “You’re the one who said it wasn’t likely to work. I’ve come to peace with it.” I tugged slightly at my thumb and tried not to look at him the wrong way. Honestly, I wasn’t ready to die, nor had I come to peace with it.

Dr. Tierney smiled slightly, “There is a chance you can still recover.”

“I understand.” I looked at Louis, his mouth turned down as he listened. “I don’t want to do chemo anymore. I’d rather live my days to the fullest than feel like I did on chemo.” I looked curiously at the court and smiled as the players started filing on. “Let’s just enjoy the game.”

Louis didn’t say anything. Most of the game, he watched intensely and ignored me. I didn’t know if this was how he was when he was focused or he was mad at me for the conversation with Dave. It’s not that it mattered, Louis had no right to be upset about my chemo, or lack for thereof.

When they dropped us off after the game, Louis asked me to stay in the car while Zayn walked Kim to the door. “So, you want to die?” He asked, not even looking at me.

I silently cursed Dave, “No, I just don’t want to have hope and it not work.” I mumbled, “Eighty-six.”

“What?” I shook my head. “Are you at least trying?” In a way, I was. I didn’t want to go so soon, but I didn’t want chemo. So yeah, in a way, I was trying.

“Of course.”

He leaned closer and played with a piece of loose hair in my face. “You’re so beautiful.” He whispered, smiling as he looked me in the eyes. “I got lucky.” He sighed.

I closed my eyes as his thumb ran across my cheek. As time moved slowly, my brain worked fast. I was thinking about how he was wrong, how I was being unfair. I was dying, he wasn’t lucky at all. If he left, he was the type of guy that would feel guilty and if he stayed and fell in love, then he would have to watch me die. Either way, the boy was destined to be screwed and it was my fault.

His lips met mine in moments, making me forget everything I had on my mind. There was no hesitation on my end as I kissed him back. All I could think about was letting myself go with him, letting all my worries go away and just being with him in every way shape and form. I wanted this half because he seemed like a genuine guy, but the other half was, I just wanted to have sex before I died. But he was so nice and I knew that would be a problem for me. And when he broke the kiss, my thoughts shifted back to reality and I was soon regretting it all.

“Zayn is probably waiting.” He bit his lip and scratched his chin. “I really had a good time. When can I see you again?”

As much as I wanted to say tomorrow, I also wanted to save him from making a big mistake with me. “I’ll call.”

There was a slight twitch of his lip and I knew he saw through my lie, but he nodded, “I’ll see you soon then.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.” I smiled thinking of last night. “Goodnight, Lydia.”

“Goodnight, Louis.”

I looked at Zayn and got out of the car, he smiled as he passed me. “Come for Chinese again soon.”

I shook my head, “I’m really not supposed to eat that stuff.”

“Maybe you girls can show us what a real meal is, sometime.” I shrugged.”Goodnight.” He said, opening the car door.

“Goodnight, Zayn.”