1988

“Patrick, you have to try.”
“Will you give me a fucking break, Toews?” Jonathan sighed. He knew why Patrick wasn’t performing his best, but he couldn’t let it consume him.
“Pat, you can’t keep thinking-”
“Don’t tell me what I can and can’t fucking do.” Jonathan took the handle from Patrick and grabbed his shirt before pulling him away.
“Kane, I’m two things, your best friend and your captain. If I tell you to do something, fucking do it. I understand that the love of your life is off on a date with some other guy, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t try at practice.” Kane opened his mouth to growl a reply, but Jonathan kept talking. “Go home. Get drunk and Q’ll sit you for the next five games.” Toews shoved Kane away from him and went back into the gym.
Patrick turned around and threw a punch into the wall. A strangled cry left his lips and he stormed to the locker room and quickly gathered his stuff.
When he arrived home, he slammed the door and threw his bag against the wall. Whatever was inside made a crash against the wall and frightened Puck. The dog scurried out of the living room and to the bedroom, where - unbeknownst to Patrick - Kitten was quietly reading The Great Gatsby.
When Puck jumped on the bed, Kitten looked up in time for Puck to scurry under her arm and hide.
“What’s wrong, babe?” Kitten set the book down and left the room, going to see what had scared Puck.
What she found terrified her.
Patrick was breaking things, throwing anything glass or porcelain against the wall. Thankfully he’d not touched anything of hers but that was probably because he cared too much for her.
“Patrick!” She rushed to him and grabbed his arm. But in his rage, he threw her off of him and into a wall. “Patrick, stop!” But Kitten didn’t give up. When he reached for another vase, she grabbed it and cradled it to her chest.
“What the fuck do you want, Kathleen!?”
“I want you to stop!” She cried. “Please!”
“No, Kathleen!” Patrick shoved her into the wall and she dropped the vase, causing it to shatter on the ground at her feet. The broken glass cuts her feet and she let out a scream, in pain and fear of Patrick. Patrick’s hands kept her shoulders against the wall and forced her to keep her feet in the shattered glass.
“Patrick! Patrick, please!” He growled at her. “Patrick! My feet! It hurts! They’re bleeding, Patrick!”
The voice that echoed in his mind wasn’t her pleading for him to stop hurting her - it was her pleading for him to stop her hurting.
He jumped back, feeling his body jerk back into consciousness.
“Ki-” His body trembled. His lips quivered. “Kitten-Kit, I-I-I’m so sorry-Kitten-” He abandoned his words. There was no way he could apologize for this and her be okay with what he’d just done to her.
He lifted her off the ground and out of the shattered glass at her feet. He carried her to the bathroom and gently set her on the sink.
“Kitten, Kitten,” He stuttered out more words, but they were nothings. They didn’t matter.
So he did what he could.
He gathered the hydrogen peroxide and Q-Tips He grabbed the box of tissues and handed them to Kitten, who gently took them - with tears down her face. Patrick kissed her knuckles and looked up at her with sad eyes. He apologized with his eyes as he went to clean her wounds.
The peroxide burned her feet, but she didn’t cry over that. She cried over him.
Over how cruelly he’d treated her.
He shoved me into a wall, broke the vase at my feet, he barely realized it was me until I screamed his name for the fourth time. But he’s still my Patrick at the end of the day.

They stayed curled up in their shared bed until a knock woke Patrick from his daydreams of Before Dallas. He muttered to Kitten that he’d be back and kissed her forehead.
Patrick Sharp and Madelyn Sharp stood at the door; Maddie’s face was grinning at Patrick Kane.
“Hey, guys.” Maddie reached for Patrick and he picked her up to hug her. “What’s up?”
“Jon.” Patrick wanted to roll his eyes, but he couldn’t. His best friend cared for him and Kitten.
“Maddie, Kitty’s in the bedroom, why don’t you go see her?” He set her down and she dashed towards the bedroom, a stuffed hawk in her arms.
“What happened?”
“Nothing, I just had a breakdown.”
“How bad?”
“Why don’t you ask Kitten? I don’t remember it.” Patrick Sharp sighed, but he understood.
“Just let Maddie cheer her up for a bit, I need to talk to you anyway.” The Patricks went to the balcony to talk.
“What’s wrong with you all of a sudden, man?” Patrick Sharp asked, sitting on one of the three chairs on the balcony. Kane sat beside him, but was too tense to lay back.
“I don’t know…” Kane shrugged, but dropped his head into his hands. “I think it’s Kitten.”
“Is it Kitten or is it you and Kitten?”
“I don’t know!”
“Hey, hey, no need to yell, I’m just trying to help.”
“I know, I just...in Dallas I wasn’t there! I’m always there for her. I’m the person she relies on so much but I wasn’t there...and then she met this guy.” Patrick spat the word as if it was venom in his mouth.
“You’re jealous.” Sharpie accused, a smirk finding it way to his lips.
“Of course I am! She’s not relying on me!” Kane shot out of his seat and all but slammed himself against the railing of the balcony. He ran his hands up and down his face and sighed as he took hold of the railing.
“Pat, she’s only been on one and a half dates with this guy, that doesn’t mean she’s not relying on you. You have a breakdown and she’s still laying in your bed, she still relies on you.”
Patrick let his head hang.
“Bet you never thought of it that way.”
“No. I haven’t.”
“Pat.”
“I’m scared of losing her. I just-I can’t do it.”
“Do what?”
“I’m scared, Sharpie.” Patrick looked up at his elder teammate with a look of sadness and fear in his eyes.
“Okay...alright.” Patrick Sharp stood up and led Kane back into the house. Maddie and Kitten were still in the bedroom, so they were still alone.
“You’ve got to tell her.”
“Tell her?”
“Yes. Tell her what’s going on. Because once she knows, she can help.”
“She can’t help this, Sharpie.”
“What can’t she help? You’re scared of losing her,”
“She can’t just fix that.”
“Yes she can. She can be here more, she can not go out with this guy so often, she can come to more games, come to practice, come to team dinners, have team dinners-”
“I love her, Sharpie! I love the way she treats me! I love the way she relies on me! I love the way she smiles when she watches Pepper trot! I love the sass in her voice as she throws a joke back at me while making me something to eat! I love the way she’ll let me do whatever I want when we lose a game! I love the way she loves me! Even if it’s not like mine!”
“Whoa, whoa, dude, calm down. She might have heard you-”
“I don’t care if she heard me! I want her to hear me! I want Chicago to hear me! I want the whole fucking world to hear! I love my best friend but she doesn’t love me back!”
“Pat, you need to calm down, you’re going to scare Maddie.”
The younger Patrick took a deep breath and glared at his teammate.
“I’m tired of being that stupid frat boy who drinks, fucks, and doesn’t care. I want something and I can’t have it!”
“You could have it if you’d take a chance.”
“You know where that got me?”
“The Stanley Cup? Taking a chance got you to the Stanley Cup Finals. You scored the final goal, you took a huge chance and won it for us. Now take another chance and love the girl of your dreams. It’s not like the team doesn’t like her - we love her!”
“I know you love her, but just because you love her doesn’t mean that she loves me!”
“You never know until you try! Pat, I’ve known you for nearly five years, I know you have the will!”
“Falling in love is different than playing hockey, Sharp!”
“D-Daddy?”
The Patricks turned around to smile at Maddie.
“Why’re you yelling?”
“We’re just…” Patrick Sharp picked up his daughter. “Talking, Maddie. What’s up?”
“Kitty’s tired.” She wrapped her arms around her father’s neck.
“Is she going to sleep?”
“Yeah. She wanted Patty to take a nap with her.”
Patrick Kane looked at his elder counterpart.
Had she heard?
Oh what the fuck does it matter? I’m the one who said I didn’t care if she - or all of Chicago - heard.
“Alright, babe. Then let’s leave them alone.”
“Okay, bye Patty!”
“I’ll see ya later, Maddie.” Maddie waved at him and Patrick Sharp carried his daughter out of the apartment.

The sound of their apartment door closing woke Kitten from her light sleep. She sits up slowly and glances around her room.
“Pat?” She called.
“I’m coming, babe.”
She waited for only two minutes before the door to the bedroom opened and Patrick came in carrying a steaming mug of tea.
“Hey, you tired?”
“A little. Is that chamomile?”
“Of course it is. Here.” He handed it to her and she sipped at it quietly. “Maddie said you wanted me to come in.”
“Yeah…” Patrick sat on the bed.
The two sat in silence.
When Kitten finished her tea, she set the mug on the side table.
“Lay with me.” Patrick pushed the blankets aside and laid beside her, taking her in his arms and kissing her hair.
“I love you, Kit.”
“I know.” She whispered back.