You Found Me

I wanted to follow him, I really did. But I didn’t to anger him even more. So it was best to just wait it out and hopefully he will cool off so I can talk with him.

I walked off and made my way back to my tent so I could lay down and let everything that just happened sink in, everyone was still off arguing about what to do about the walkers in the shed.

“Is everything alright?” Andrea asked me walking up to me.

“Yeah, I am fine. Thank you for the concern.” I said smiling.

“I saw how Daryl shouted at you, he was probably just upset about Shane, and I wouldn’t take it personally. I mean Shane was being an ass.” She said.

“Yeah, I’d say.” I said looking down at my feet.

I felt a stinging pain in my head as I thought about what Shane did to me last night, and I wanted to tell Andrea what happened. I really did, but I knew that if I would Shane would find out, and seeing as to how he acted at the barn he might actually go about his treat to me.

I kept my mouth shut and didn’t say a word, and made my way back into my tent. I stared up at the ceiling and thought about everything. My head was spinning with thoughts, and they felt like way too much to take.

I got up suddenly and started shuffling through my bag, I was looking for something. Something I
shouldn’t be looking for, but my thoughts where leading to it. I couldn’t stop my mind from wanting to do this. I found the sharp piece of glass I had hidden beneath my bag. I’ve been clean of this nasty habit for quite some time, but everything just felt like too much and I had no escape but to do this.
I thought about the ac tion I was about to take, I thought for quite some time about it. I didn’t really want to do it, but I felt that it would make me feel bit better. Maybe I could numb every bad emotion I was feeling, like I used to do and turn it to something I was used to. I was used to the pain.
I slowly dug the sharpest end of the glass to the side of my leg, I felt it cut deep into the skin and I dragged it down my leg. I saw the blood begin to seep out, and quickly grabbed a sock to stop it from getting on my sleeping bag. I put my hand over my mouth to stop myself from screaming. I felt the familiar sharp stinging pain run down my leg. I placed the piece of glass down and looked at the damage I had done. The cut seemed pretty deep, and wrapped the sock around it tightly to hopefully stop the bleeding a little bit more.

Even though my leg was in enough pain, it still hadn’t felt like enough and I wanted to feel more. I picked up the glass and held it closely towards my upper arm. I dug in, but a little less deep this time. I watched as the blood slowly seeped out from the cut. I did a few more on my lower arm and on my legs.

I hadn’t thought about the time that had passed and the damage that I had done to myself, but I looked at everything and realized I may have just gone a little too far.
I laid down and cried, for a very long time. I was frightened and scared, and now I had cuts everywhere, someone was bound to notice and wonder why I had done it. Someone would find out eventually, it was hot weather we were living in, I couldn’t wear sweaters forever.
I eventually ended up falling asleep, and dreaming about everything. Being chased by walkers were the main items of my dreams. As well as, Shane…what happened with him would stick to my mind like glue forever. I also dreamt about Daryl shouting at me, he was so cold.
I woke up hours later; my stomach rumbled indicating it was most likely dinner time. I threw a sweater over my arms and made my way over to the campfire where Carol and Lori where dishing up some freshly cooked fish.

“Did you take a nap or something?” Savannah asked.

I shook my head yes and began slowly picking through my food, I was hungry but I hardly had an appetite to eat anything.

I noticed from the corner of my eye Daryl was watching me, again with that worried look in his eye. He seemed to be glancing at my wrists like he knew I had done something. I pulled down my sleeves and continued to eat.

“Hows Carl doing?” I asked Lori.

“He’s doing much better, he’s just resting inside right now. He’ll be up and about tomorrow.” She said with much excitement in her voice.

I turned to get up and leave to head back to my tent, and as I did so I happened to ever so slightly bump into Daryl’s arm as he was walking past me.

“Better watch yourself sunshine.” He snapped at me walking off.

I just stood there and watched him walk off smugly, I needed to talk to him but not if he was going to be having this attitude towards me again.

“What’s your damn problem!?” I asked him.

“You need to watch where you’re going!” He shouted at me.

I had a feeling that wasn’t all that was bothering him, and we still hadn’t talked about the incident from last night. Something else was looming in his dark mind and he was taking it out on me.

“Yes, I am sorry Daryl. I’ll watch where I’m going from now on.” I gave in and apologized to him, even though it was an accident I had bumped into him.

He looked slightly shocked at the fact I had not insulted him back, but just glared back at me over his shoulder and continued walking away. I wanted to follow him, I wanted to apologize for last night and what happened, but I stayed put right where I was.

I decided to go off on a walk on my own in the woods, just to see if I could hunt anything or what not. Also to clear my head of all these heart wrenching thoughts I had going on, and I knew how to use a gun, and a knife. I made my way over to my tent to grab the knife that was hidden beneath my pillow case, I put it into a holder I had in my pocket and slid my gun on the other side.

I was starting to walk towards the forest when Leanne ran up to my side.

“Where are you going?” She asked suddenly.

“Just off on a walk.” I said glancing at her.

“May I join you?” She asked.

I was going to say no, but seeing as she looked incredibly bored and needed something to do. I had
agreed to let her come with me.

“I guess so; go get a knife from your tent.” I told her and watched as she went out to her tent to grab her knife.

I felt a cold hand on my shoulder and spun around, I was face to face with Shane. I stepped back and he moved forward towards me.

“Get away from me!” I shouted at him.

“Listen, I just wanted to talk about last night. I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking, and I was also slightly intoxicated.” He rambled on.

“Leave me the hell alone.” I said walking away from him.

“Can’t we just talk about it?!” He shouted.

“THERE’S NOTHING TO TALK ABOUT!” I screamed at him and it caused everyone who was around the fire to turn around and stare at us, including Daryl who seemed rather concerned with the situation.
I started walking away fast when Leanne started walking next to me.

“What was that all about?” She asked worried.

“It was nothing.” I said looking at my feet.

“It sure didn’t look like nothing.” She said concerned.

We made our way into the woods, and Leanne walked beside me. Constantly looking around herself for walkers that could appear at any moment.

“So honestly, whats going on with you and Shane?” She asked.

“Nothing’s going on, we went for a walk and he tried to kiss me and I pushed him away. I guess he’s
just upset about it all.” I told her.

She could tell that there was something more going on, but I wasn’t about to tell any of it to her. She didn’t need to know. I also took Shane’s threats seriously, so I didn’t say anything.

“I see, and what about Daryl.” She was getting more and more curious about everything going on.

“I’m not sure what’s going on with him, one second he’s being a total douchebag, and then the next he’s sweet and making conversation with me, and then a douchebag again.” I explained to her.

“He probably likes you, he’s just afraid to show it.” She said.

“I highly doubt that, if he liked me he would make up his mind already about being nice to me or not.” I said.

We walked through the forest a bit longer and found a clearing with a small farm house, we decided to go investigate it to see if there was anything inside it like food.

“What a nice little house!” Leanne exclaimed walking up to the barn.

“Careful.” I said leaning up against the door. “There could be walkers inside.”

I knocked on the door to the house a few times, but heard nothing going on inside. I peeked inside the window and saw no movement either. It seemed to be safe to go on in.
I slowly turned the knob to the door, and pushed my way in. Knife in hand, as I slowly crept in with Leanne behind me.

The people who once lived in this house had clearly left the moment of the outbreak, there things where packed away and everything was left out on the floor. They took their photos with them, as there were no photos on the wall.

“Doesn’t seem to be anything we can take.” I said to Leanne.

“Why don’t you go look around upstairs, and I will stay down here.” She said wondering off in the kitchen.

I slowly crept my way up the stairs, keeping my knife in hand just in case. I made my way into a bathroom first to see if there was any medicine still here that I could take back with me.
I opened up a cabinet and found all sorts of pain killers that could be useful for us to take back, plenty of other medicine like cough syrup and other important essentials.
I grabbed a small carrying bag from the closet of the bathroom and stuffed the medicine inside of it, I also grabbed some band aids and other medical items.

I made my way back down stairs and saw that Leanne had found some food that had not gone bad, mostly noodles and canned food.

“Wow, we have hit the jackpot!” She exclaimed excitedly.

“We should probably get headed back; the others are probably getting worried.” I said looking out the window at the increased darken sky.

We made our way outside, and I heard some groans coming from the distance. I knew that meant there where walkers coming towards us.

“Keep on the lookout for walkers!” I whispered to Leanne who was walking off ahead of me.
She turned and nodded and kept on walking, looking over her shoulders every so often for walkers. I did the same, and we were safe for quite some time, until we turned a corner and there was a giant herd of them coming towards us.

“RUN!” I shouted.

Leanne started to run, as did I. But I knew we had no choice, there where way too many of them and we were not going to survive this by just running. We were going to have to use our guns and shoot our way through this mess.