You Found Me

“Dale could get under your skin, he sure got under mine. Because he wasn't afraid to say exactly what he thought. What he felt. That kind of honesty is rare. Brave. Whenever I would make a decision I would look at Dale he would be looking back at me with that look he had. We've all seen it one time or another. In the end he was talking about loosing our humanity. He said this group is broken. The best way to honor him is to unbreak it. Stop feeling sorry for ourselves, take control of our lives. Our safety. Our future. Were not broken. Were gunna prove him wrong. From now on were gunna do it his way." Rick said in honor of Dale at his funeral the next day. “That is how we honor Dale.”
 
I looked up into the sky and took notice of how the clouds had formed, and how the sun was shining through. It was like he was there, smiling down at us.
 
I glanced up at Daryl slightly who was looking at the ground, then slowly looked up at me. His facial expression didn’t show anything, not sadness, not anger; he was just drained and worn out. He turned around and walked back to his tent, and Savannah and I stood right where we were for a moment.
 
“What now?” Savannah asked.
 
“This is just another thing we have to get through.” I replied.
 
“What if we can’t?” She wondered.
 
“We’ve been through so much already, this is just another thing.” I told her.
 
“I suppose…” She said trailing off to her tent.
 
Everyone slowly started wandering off to mourn by themselves, I stood there silently and just processed my thoughts together.
 
"It will be okay, it will be okay, it will be okay, and it will be okay". I repeated that to myself about a thousand times before I started to believe it. So much has happened, losing my first camp, Leanne getting bit, now Dale.. And this all felt like only the beginning. I knew I had to stay strong if I wanted to fight this, and I needed to fight this.
 
I looked up at the sky and I wondered, if there was really a god out there why had this happened. Why were there so many good people gone, why couldn’t he protect him, and why was I still here. How come I got to live while so many had to suffer, and go hungry and be scared? Was this life, was this forever? Will things one day go back to how they used to be, will everyone find a sense of belonging and happiness? Or was this all that was left? Torture and pain and survival, and running so much running.
 
I turned and sulked away from the grave, I couldn’t stand there any longer, and I decided to go for a long walk by myself. I needed to be alone to work through everything. I had my gun easily reachable in my back pocket whenever I needed to just grab it, in case of walkers.

The wind whistled among the trees and sung a silent song, that echoed in my mind. I listened closely and reflected on the peace that I crave so much. 

As I was beginning to relax and calm myself, I had a feeling that I was not alone anymore. I could feel someone's eyes watching me and hoping I couldn't tell.
 
A branch snapped beneath someone’s foot and startled the crap out of me, I looked around with my gun pointed but no one seemed to be there.

I continued on my walk and found myself by a small small creek.

I walked up to the waters edge and sat down, it felt peaceful. Unfortunately that peaceful moment didn't last too long because I again began hearing footsteps in the bush. 

I got up and turned around and pointed my gun and had my knife in the other hand, I was shaking and was scared.

"Is that the bitch?!" I heard a man yell.

"Yeah its her!" A firmilar voice said.

Shane walked out of the bush with three other tougher looking men with him.

"Look who it is, long time no see!" He shouted at me with an anger in his voice.

"What are you doing around here?" I asked puzzled.

"Wanted to see how the old gang was doing then I ran into you" he said.

"Yah well you better leave before Rick and Daryl find out you're still here!" I told him locking my gun on him.

"Now why you making up lies about me?" He asked.

"Lies?! What lies?! Everything I told him happened and you know it." I said

He started walking towards me and I began backing away from him, one of his friends eyed me down cautiously and I turned and started running. It seemed like the only right thing to do to get away from them.