Washed out Rock Song
Chapter Seven.
I waited on the curb in front of my car for John’s truck to pull up. This was the second morning I was missing my much needed before-school-cigarrette because of him. At least this time he wasn’t as late as before. His truck pulled into the parking lot before it was even half full.
I grabbed my backpack off of the ground and made my way to his truck. “Hey.”
He grabbed his backpack from the bed of his truck and faced me but kept his eyes looking at the ground. “What do you want?”
I finally noticed a girl jump down from the passenger side of his truck. She was a sophomore cheerleader that I recognized from Kira’s pictures. Her name was Maria or Marla, something with an M. “Thanks John,” she said, starting towards the school, “I’ll see you later."
I felt my heart drop. He was already on to the next one. I looked at John and he wouldn’t make eye contact with me. “Okay,” I said, my voice shook, “I get it.”
I turned around and made my way into the school. I felt my eyes beginning to form tears and I held them back. There was no reason for me to feel upset, but I couldn't help it. I made my way into Mr. Holloway’s first period History class and took a seat near the window. I eyed Kennedy out of the corner of my eye. He was waiting patiently for class to start and I wondered why someone like him would be friends with someone like John.
As the bell rang, last minute arrivers shuffled into the room. Mr. Holloway started a powerpoint right away and I watched as everyone hurried to scribble every note down before the slides changed. I looked down at my blank piece of paper.
I wondered why I was so upset when I saw that girl jump out of his car. I guess because it made me wonder. If they were together this morning, does that mean they were together last night?
I looked back at Kennedy again, he wasn’t taking notes and instead was staring down in his lap. I assumed he was on his phone. He looked up at me and I looked away, embarrassed that he caught me watching him.
What was Kira going to do when I told her what happened this morning? No doubt she would be upset. I had to make this better, right? I had to get this plan back on track. So, John slept with another girl this weekend, so what? That’s what he does. I couldn’t be upset over that. I was just being stupid.
I thought about what I would say to him the rest of class, but I was still clueless. The bell rang and I gathered my stuff. This was going to be a long day.
I went through the rest of my classes still wondering what I would say to him, but I guess I would have to figure it out in the moment. The last bell rang and I was the first one out of the room. I needed a smoke.
I made my way to the back of the school where John’s group of friends was forming. There were only three of them. John was easy to pick out, he was the tallest. His back was to me. I leaned against the brick wall, my feet next to the pile of cigarette butts I left on the ground. I watched as Kennedy motioned towards me. John turned for a second and then back towards his group of friends.
I pulled a pack of smokes out of the front pocket of my backpack and dropped my bag onto the ground next to me. One of John’s friends, Jared, was making his way into his circle of friends. He also motioned at John towards me. John flashed a look at me again but this time he didn’t look back at his friends. He started making his way towards me as I lit my cigarette up.
“Why do you do that?” He asked, as he approached.
“What?”
“Why do you smoke?”
I shrugged. “It makes me feel better.”
John flashed a look at his friends and I did the same. They were all watching us, but it was too far for them to hear. “Look,” John said, “About Marie...”
“You don’t have to explain,” I interrupted.
“Yes, I do.” He said. “Leah, I know what you were thinking when you saw her get out of the truck, but you’re wrong.”
I threw my cigarette on the ground and stomped it out, even though I wasn’t done with it yet. I realized that this was a bad idea. I pulled my backpack off the ground and threw it over my shoulder. I started to walk away, but I felt John’s arm on my wrist.
“Leah,” he said, pulling me back to face him. Not in a rough way, it was almost sincere. “Please Leah, talk to me.”
“Look,” I started. “I came to apologize to you this morning. So yeah, I was a little surprised when you showed up with some girl.” He dropped his hand from my wrist. “But I don’t care. We went on one date. You and I, we’re nothing. You are allowed to sleep with whoever you want, it’s really none of my business.”
John dropped his head and snickered before looking back up at me with a grin on his face.
I crossed my arms. “What’s so funny?"
“So you admit that it was a date?”
I rolled me eyes and turned to walk away again.
“Wait, wait, Leah,” he said.
I stopped and turned towards him again, still crossing my arms.
“Leah, I’m kidding,” he said, “I’m laughing because Marie,” he stopped and let out a laugh again. “Marie is my cousin.”
I shook my head. “How am I supposed to believe that.”
He shrugged. “She just got a car for her 16th birthday, but it’s a piece of shit. It keeps breaking down on her, so my mom is making me drive her to school this week while it gets looked at.” He paused. “Leah, you’re just going to have to trust me.”
I believed him, and now I felt like a complete idiot. Why was I even jealous at all? I looked at him and dropped my arms. His green eyes were once again digging into mine. I leaned against the wall again, “Okay,” I managed to get out.
He smiled. “So we’re good?”
I nodded. “We’re good.”
He held his hands out. “Come here.”
I pushed off of the brick wall behind me and took a step towards him. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. I felt my heart beating faster again as I took in the faint scent of lavender detergent on his white T-shirt and wrapped my arms around him as well.
He pulled away but held onto my arms. “Lets go do something.”
I nodded and he grabbed my backpack off of my shoulder and swung it onto his. I once again became very aware of his friends watching us when he turned to wave at them for a second. He threw his arm over my shoulder and led me to his truck.
I grabbed my backpack off of the ground and made my way to his truck. “Hey.”
He grabbed his backpack from the bed of his truck and faced me but kept his eyes looking at the ground. “What do you want?”
I finally noticed a girl jump down from the passenger side of his truck. She was a sophomore cheerleader that I recognized from Kira’s pictures. Her name was Maria or Marla, something with an M. “Thanks John,” she said, starting towards the school, “I’ll see you later."
I felt my heart drop. He was already on to the next one. I looked at John and he wouldn’t make eye contact with me. “Okay,” I said, my voice shook, “I get it.”
I turned around and made my way into the school. I felt my eyes beginning to form tears and I held them back. There was no reason for me to feel upset, but I couldn't help it. I made my way into Mr. Holloway’s first period History class and took a seat near the window. I eyed Kennedy out of the corner of my eye. He was waiting patiently for class to start and I wondered why someone like him would be friends with someone like John.
As the bell rang, last minute arrivers shuffled into the room. Mr. Holloway started a powerpoint right away and I watched as everyone hurried to scribble every note down before the slides changed. I looked down at my blank piece of paper.
I wondered why I was so upset when I saw that girl jump out of his car. I guess because it made me wonder. If they were together this morning, does that mean they were together last night?
I looked back at Kennedy again, he wasn’t taking notes and instead was staring down in his lap. I assumed he was on his phone. He looked up at me and I looked away, embarrassed that he caught me watching him.
What was Kira going to do when I told her what happened this morning? No doubt she would be upset. I had to make this better, right? I had to get this plan back on track. So, John slept with another girl this weekend, so what? That’s what he does. I couldn’t be upset over that. I was just being stupid.
I thought about what I would say to him the rest of class, but I was still clueless. The bell rang and I gathered my stuff. This was going to be a long day.
I went through the rest of my classes still wondering what I would say to him, but I guess I would have to figure it out in the moment. The last bell rang and I was the first one out of the room. I needed a smoke.
I made my way to the back of the school where John’s group of friends was forming. There were only three of them. John was easy to pick out, he was the tallest. His back was to me. I leaned against the brick wall, my feet next to the pile of cigarette butts I left on the ground. I watched as Kennedy motioned towards me. John turned for a second and then back towards his group of friends.
I pulled a pack of smokes out of the front pocket of my backpack and dropped my bag onto the ground next to me. One of John’s friends, Jared, was making his way into his circle of friends. He also motioned at John towards me. John flashed a look at me again but this time he didn’t look back at his friends. He started making his way towards me as I lit my cigarette up.
“Why do you do that?” He asked, as he approached.
“What?”
“Why do you smoke?”
I shrugged. “It makes me feel better.”
John flashed a look at his friends and I did the same. They were all watching us, but it was too far for them to hear. “Look,” John said, “About Marie...”
“You don’t have to explain,” I interrupted.
“Yes, I do.” He said. “Leah, I know what you were thinking when you saw her get out of the truck, but you’re wrong.”
I threw my cigarette on the ground and stomped it out, even though I wasn’t done with it yet. I realized that this was a bad idea. I pulled my backpack off the ground and threw it over my shoulder. I started to walk away, but I felt John’s arm on my wrist.
“Leah,” he said, pulling me back to face him. Not in a rough way, it was almost sincere. “Please Leah, talk to me.”
“Look,” I started. “I came to apologize to you this morning. So yeah, I was a little surprised when you showed up with some girl.” He dropped his hand from my wrist. “But I don’t care. We went on one date. You and I, we’re nothing. You are allowed to sleep with whoever you want, it’s really none of my business.”
John dropped his head and snickered before looking back up at me with a grin on his face.
I crossed my arms. “What’s so funny?"
“So you admit that it was a date?”
I rolled me eyes and turned to walk away again.
“Wait, wait, Leah,” he said.
I stopped and turned towards him again, still crossing my arms.
“Leah, I’m kidding,” he said, “I’m laughing because Marie,” he stopped and let out a laugh again. “Marie is my cousin.”
I shook my head. “How am I supposed to believe that.”
He shrugged. “She just got a car for her 16th birthday, but it’s a piece of shit. It keeps breaking down on her, so my mom is making me drive her to school this week while it gets looked at.” He paused. “Leah, you’re just going to have to trust me.”
I believed him, and now I felt like a complete idiot. Why was I even jealous at all? I looked at him and dropped my arms. His green eyes were once again digging into mine. I leaned against the wall again, “Okay,” I managed to get out.
He smiled. “So we’re good?”
I nodded. “We’re good.”
He held his hands out. “Come here.”
I pushed off of the brick wall behind me and took a step towards him. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into his chest. I felt my heart beating faster again as I took in the faint scent of lavender detergent on his white T-shirt and wrapped my arms around him as well.
He pulled away but held onto my arms. “Lets go do something.”
I nodded and he grabbed my backpack off of my shoulder and swung it onto his. I once again became very aware of his friends watching us when he turned to wave at them for a second. He threw his arm over my shoulder and led me to his truck.