We Part Only to Meet Again

I stared p to the chandelier that twinkled in the shadow of Zayn’s slowly lightening room as warm light

crawled across my skin like thick honey. My dry eyes wandered to the sound of the busy street below,

I carried myself with weak legs and sat on the carpet by the window. I pressed my cheek to the glass

and looked out to the morning sky in a conscious daze.

The whole night my brain felt the need to re-run what happened with Harry, against my will.

Why would he think I could do that to him?

Was he expecting it from the point Evan and me got close?

My brows crinkled together in remembrance of the sureness in his voice,

“what am I supposed to think?”

my lips mimicked his words, but what was left out was the bitter accusation on his tongue. Why

wouldn’t he trust me? I hadn’t noticed I started crying at the repetitive thoughts and I wiped them

fiercely off my flushed cheeks.

“don’t beat yourself up” Zayn sighed, walking into the room.

I kept my eyes focused outside; I really don’t want him or anyone to see me like this, why would I

want them to know I let him hurt me? Zayn placed a hand on my shoulder and turned me around

“he came by”

my eyes flickered up to his quickly. His face fell into pity filled smile and he sat cross legged on the

floor, pulling me into his lap. He comforted me just by being here and holding me, I planned on

spending today in my own solitude. But it feels good to have a friend here for me knowing that I’m

hurting. I don’t know what it was that brought me to his in the first place, if I had known this would

happen I would have thought I’d go to Louis or Niall knowing that I’m closer with them. Zayn being

with me now makes me feel like the boys are letting me into the group as a good friend with the lot of

them, it seems lame but the smile creeping onto my lips woke me up a bit from the shadiness of the

moment before

“He’s come knocking about a thousand times” he chuckled

And in a snap my smile faded. I slipped shakily from his grasp and stood, looking past the glass again

as if the city was the only thing that could calm me right now

“he’s sorry, love. I think you should give him-“

“A chance?”

My eyes stung and my face, my body, my whole… it just feels like I’m sinking

“Do you have a fag?” I croaked.

He nodded and crawled to the nightstand, opening the first drawer and tossed me an unopened pack.

I smiled to him and walked out into the crisp air; thankful he didn't question my stress provoked habit.

I perched my elbows on the concrete rail and took in a deep breathe, I fumbled to open the packet

before finally holding my safety in my cold hands.

My safety.

It’s funny how the thing that “kills” me is what I seek when I’m at my worst. I brought it past my lips

and held it as I searched for my lighter that I always carry. Of course my luck, I don’t have it with me

the one time I need it. My hands shook in desperation before I finally gave up in a fit of tears. I slid

my down the hard corner and sat on the cold gravel. I feel filthy even though I didn't do anything

wrong. This… this whole thing is just giving me sickening vibes. My jaw clenched as my eyes skimmed

over my outfit. Don’t people usually dress a bit more revealing if their planning to shag off with

another. (http://www.polyvore.com/je_suis_une_fille_belle/set?id=111861888)

For fucks sake, I look homeless! That’s not even the point. I shouldn't be feeling so shit for

being accused of something so fucking stupid and having not done it. I told him that I love him, is that

not enough? Am I not showing? Maybe he deserves more. My face was wet with tears and my breath

came out as hiccups as I sat in the corner, listening to the city, listening to myself tear apart.

“I fucking love you”

HARRY’S P.O.V

I watched in surprise, she walked right into the room without a word and began to fill her bag with

clothes. My eyes followed her every move in despair, I really hurt her “Felix, please” I sighed, pressing

my hand down on the case. She paused but her eyes didn't leave contact with my hand

“just. Can we start over. I’m sorry, please?” I pleaded.

I smiled with hope as her head raised and her hair fell back. Tears instantly spilled over and I had to

do a double take. I don’t want to believe that I caused her to look like the gone I saw in her before. I

caused it this time; I accused her of something she didn't do just because I was stupidly jealous. She’s

told me over and over and over that she loves me and I know she does, and I know I do. Gently, she

pushed my hand aside and closed the bag and walked back out the door, leaving me alone again. I fell

back onto the bed and closed my eyes for a moment before returning to my feet and pulled my boots
on.

Oliver’s hard eyes looked at me mercilessly as I struggled to explain with the right words to him what

happened to Felix and me
“so what you’re saying is you’ve accused my sister of cheating and now you want me to tell her you’re

SO sorry so that she can run back into your arms?”

the words rolled off his tongue with carelessness and annoyance. I nodded my head slowly, it is what I

wanted but the way he said it sounded wrong “no” he shrugged “tell her yourself. If you can’t do that,

you don’t deserve her”

I stood from my place on the couch and smoothed a hand along my jaw. He’s right, if I can’t prove it to

her then I don’t deserve her

“can you just tell her I was here?” I sighed. He shrugged and left towards the kitchen.

I left the room, seeing the carelessness still in his composure for what I wanted.

I fixated my attention to the road and drove to where the boys and I are getting interviewed; I already

know what the obvious main talk will be. They always want to pick out our personal lives, but

annoyingly 90 percent their attention goes to stomping a shovel into my life. Questions in which these

hosts need to learn their boundaries before even thinking of asking me in front of thousands of

viewers.

I entered the heated room and stuffed my keys in my pocket. My eyes fell low at her presence; she sat

on the couch in the dressing room as the boys got their hair and such done. It made me nervous

already just seeing her; I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable by the most likely inappropriate

questions, and obvious digging into our relationship. I’m sure it will be even better for the host because

of what happened outside of the hotel last night.

I sat beside her and her eyes skimmed over me as if I were a stranger, leaving an ache inside of me.

After what seemed like an eternity she looked down to her shaking legs and fiddled with the hem of

her dress
(http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=111655729)

I placed my hand on her shaking legs. Her movement stopped and she moved over, I sighed removing

my touch and looked up to the boys, Louis already looking. He sent me a sad smile and turned back so

Lou could fix up his hair. I turned back to her and, quickly she fixated her attention to the television

that showed the audience filling in chairs and she grimaced, standing and walking to grab a water

bottle from the refreshment table. A small pat on my shoulder clocked me back to reality and I

sighed, looking at Zayn’s worried face “she’ll come around” he smiled, patting my shoulder one last

time before he stalked over to her side. Zayn's sudden arrival seemed like a queue for her to seek

comfort from him and her arms wrapped him tightly as he whispered words that seemed to make her

loosen up. A ping of anger flushed my face as I peered at the two; I rolled my eyes and looked away.

I leaned my elbows on my knees and held my face. I know he’s just comforting her because he sees

his friend is nervous, but I can’t help but feel irritated at the fact that right now I am the last person

she’ll look for comfort in.

“Welcome to the chatty man” my attention maneuvered to the television as

the all too familiar host started the show “tonight we have a lot for you!” he shouted

“Harry! Why didn't you tell me you haven’t gotten your hair or anything done” Lou gaped, tousling my

hair quickly with her fingers “there you are” she sighed spraying my hair “best I can do now, go a

long” she shooed me, I hadn't noticed we were called out.

I walked down the steps and waved to the audience with a big grin and sat down with the boys, Felix

looked calmer than before and she smiled as the host talked with her. I took a chance, putting my arm

around her waist because she tensed at my touch but settled herself.

“Harry, are you alright? You look like you've seen a dead man!”the host laughed loudly as did the

audience.

I shook my head “no, I’m fine” I chuckled

“alright then” he chuckled “SO” he started “we have a lot for our audience today, Kitt, sweetheart here

is going to sing us a song later?” he looked at her with a grin and she nodded “yes, I am” she grinned

“it’s a bit Christmassy”

“well, it is a few days from Christmas” he poked, humorously informing her “two” Liam added.

“And how are you, Liam?” he asked, switching his attention.

“I’m alright. The audience is looking beautiful tonight” he said charmingly

“what a charmer” Louis squealed like a girl sending the crowd into uproar.

The host grinned and looked to Felix again “well, are you ready, sweetheart?” he asked

“now?” she shuddered

“yes now, not later. Come on don’t be nervous. Kitt everyone” he clapped as she walked to a mic at the

beginning of the stage, she waved nervously to the clapping fans and many did their ‘awe’s’ as she took

a deep breath. She started and everyone cheered at the classic ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DeNhjPaP53I)

“Santa Baby, slip a sable under the tree,

for me. Been an awful good girl, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight. Santa baby, a 54

convertible too, Light blue. I’ll wait up for you dear, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Think of all the fun I've missed, Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed, Next year I could be just as

good, If you'll check off my Christmas list, Santa baby, I want a yacht, And really that's not a lot, Been

an angel all year, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight. Santa honey, there's one thing I

really do need, The deed, To a platinum mine, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight. Santa

cutie, and fill my stocking with a duplex, And checks. Sign your 'X' on the line, Santa cutie, and hurry

down the chimney tonight. Come and trim my Christmas tree, With some decorations bought at

Tiffany's, I really do believe in you let’s see if you believe in me, Santa baby, forgot to mention one

little thing, A ring. I don't mean on the phone, Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight, Hurry

down the chimney tonight, Hurry, tonight” everyone screamed and gave her a standing ovation as she

stepped away from the mic and walked over.

“that’s yours” the host winked at me before she sat down. I kissed her cheek softly and she gave me a

small smile as the crowd ‘awed’ once again, making me grin. For a moment it felt like we were okay

and she was happy, she is happy I can see it on her face that a huge weight was lifted from her

shoulders and the still cheering crowd kept the smile on her lips going.

“you are sexy!” the host gasped placing a hand on her knee, momentarily, then placing it to his heart as

his mouth hung open “Harry you are a lucky one!” he laughed. She giggled, thanking him and looked

to me with those sparkling hazel eyes and said “I hope” with that hope in her voice that shouldn't be

there because I am more than a lucky one.