Broken Lullaby

Five months later

Sydney finished packing her things, sitting on top of her suitcase in an effort to zip it closed. She huffed and blew the strands of hair that insisted in standing in her face as she pulled the zipper as harder as she could, but still it wouldn’t budge.

Why do I need so much stuff for just a weekend? She thought to herself as she pried open the black wheeler bag and it almost vomited its content. The problem was that this was just not an ordinary weekend away; this was the weekend she was going spend in Huntington Beach. For the first time since she had left.

She didn’t know why she was so nervous about that weekend. It was not like she was going to return after years without any news, she had kept in touch with everybody. Or at least almost everybody.

During the last five months all the words she had exchanged with Brian had been through other people. Just simple words of cordiality, like when she would call Matt and he would tell that Brian said hi, or when she talked to Michelle and knew he was around. It sounded weird, looked weird and probability they all thought it was weird, but no one dared to say a word about it.

She reorganized her suitcase, deciding not to pack every piece of clothing she owned, and this time it closed.

She dragged her luggage to the front door and looked around. Her apartment was small, a joke when compared to the house she and Morgan used to share. There was only one bedroom and one bathroom and a kitchen connect to the living room, which wouldn’t be big enough to fit all her friends, but she didn’t mind. She hadn’t been focused on making friends in Miami.

Sydney turned the lights off before closing the door. She needed to get a taxi soon or she would miss her flight. She smiled at herself. Michelle would love that.

The main reason why Sydney would be travelling to Huntington was so that she could take part in the bridesmaids’ dresses fitting. She didn’t look forward to it, but she had promised Michelle. The other reason was to find out how things between Morgan and Zacky had evolved. If you were here you would know by now. That’s what Morgan told her every time she asked how things were between them. What a smart ass.

Sydney saw the taxi stop right in front of her and got in. The only thing that calmed her, was knowing that the guys wouldn’t be around. They had been on tour for the last month and were going to be until the end of the next one. It’s not like she didn’t miss them, she wasn’t just sure if she could handle seeing everybody again, after being away for five months. That could be enough to make her change her mind about Miami, could make her realize she had been wasting their friendship and that she needed them to be happy. But she needed to go through with this, she needed to let go of Brian and only time and distance could make it possible.

Sydney arrived at the airport, quickly finding the boarding gates assigned for her flight.

Now that she waited to board, boredom assaulted her. In Miami she had maintained herself constantly busy, as an excuse for not calling them or thinking about them that much.

As Christmas came closer, Jimmy had phoned her, inviting her for the Christmas party, almost begging her to come back to Huntington. Once again, she excused herself with her job and that she had already planned to spend Christmas with her parents and brother.

The same happened on New Year’s Eve. By then, everybody insisted she was avoiding them, even though she had guaranteed them that it wasn’t true. And it wasn’t. She was just trying to avoid Brian, which meant having to avoid everybody else.

Almost five hours later Sydney finally stood foot on Los Angeles. The butterflies in her stomach stirred up as she picked her luggage and headed to the arrival’s area. Excitement made her eyes seek the crowd in frenzy. Morgan had to be somewhere in there.

A loud shout made her look in the opposite direction, her smile lighting her face as the black haired woman ran toward her.

“Sydney! Oh my God, I’ve missed you so much!” Morgan’s arms dangled around her neck. A few feet away, four women waved at her.

“Now that I’m here, can you please tell me what’s going on with you and Zacky?” She whispered, before smiling at Valary and the others that now approached them.

Morgan laughed and let go her neck, allowing them to hug Sydney.

There was intense chatter inside Valary’s suv, as she drove back to her house, which had become now the headquarters for Michelle’s wedding preparations. They were excited to see Sydney again, but she found it overwhelming. Too many questions from too many people.

The moon was high in the sky as Valary dropped Sydney and Morgan at her house.

“Tomorrow at nine in the morning, sharp! Don’t you dare to be late!” Michelle yelled from her seat before waving goodbye as Valary drove off.

Sydney huffed as she dragged her luggage inside Morgan’s house. Tomorrow was fitting day. Tomorrow was not going to be a fun day. She looked around and smiled. She had missed their house.

“I’m still looking for a smaller place to move in,” Morgan commented as if reading her mind. “This house is too expensive for just one income.” There was a hint of mordacity in her words, but Sydney decided to ignore it.

“So… you and Zacky?” Sydney was eager to hear the good news.

“Me and Zacky? We’ve been going out for a while now.” Morgan tried to sound as casual as possible. “We like each other’s company, but there’s nothing serious.”

“Yet,” Sydney pointed out, letting her body fall on the sofa. Morgan sat next to her. “So, have you kissed already?”

“Well…” Morgan started to blush, which made her laugh.

“That sounds like a yes to me. Good.” She placed her arms on the back of her head, as if admiring her good work.

Morgan’s fingers fidgeted on her lap, her back stiff and worried look on her face. “Syd, I need to tell you something.”

“Did you guys reach second base?”

“Sydney!” Morgan jumped off the couch, a shocked look on her face.

“What?! I’m not asking for any sordid details, it’s just a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question.” She snickered.

“Could you please shut up for a second?!” Morgan snapped. “I’m trying to tell you something!”

Sydney’s laugher stopped abruptly. She could see in Morgan’s face that something was wrong. “What happened?”

Morgan sat back on the sofa. Sydney got closer to her. “You know you can tell me anything. What’s wrong?”

“I…” She couldn’t find the courage to speak the words. “Zacky knows.”

Sydney didn’t get it at first. “Knows what?”

“About you and Brian,” Morgan almost whispered.

“What?!” Sydney shot up. “Are you insane?! What the hell did you tell him? Why?”

“I’m sorry Syd, I was tired of all the secrets!” She too got up from the couch. There was pain and sorrow in the way she talked. “You can’t imagine how it’s been like since you left. Nobody understood why, they started to get angry at you. I had to be honest with him.” She shook her head and looked down at her feet. “I had to tell him the truth.”

“How much did you tell him?” Sydney was scared to know the answer, her face all reddened from the rage that was building inside of her.

“Every sordid detail.” Morgan smiled weakly, using the words Sydney had before.

“What the -” Sydney grunted, running her fingers through her hair unconsciously. “I cannot believe it, Morgan.” She paced back and forth.

“I know, and I’m sorry. But I just couldn’t help it. I had to tell someone.” She knew Sydney wouldn’t forgive her soon, but she had to understand her reasons. Everybody questioned Sydney’s decision to move to Miami and she was tired of being the only one to know the truth. Besides, she trusted Zacky.

Sydney flashed her a disapproving look, before darting towards the front door.

“Where are you going?” Morgan’s voice showed concern.

“It's none of your fucking business.”