Coming Home

“What the hell is this?”

“Not you too Tobias.”

“I’m fucking serious! Do you have a death wish?”

Cassadee let out a frustrated sound and pushed herself forcefully back against the bar seat. She had received an angry text from Tobias telling her to meet at The Red Thorn, thinking that it was about his relationship problems- but apparently Tobias wanted to talk about her obviously distasteful life decisions.

“There is nothing good that can come out of this.”

“You were the one that told me to write about it Tobias!”

“I told you to write something, not fucking criticize every single working man in this country!”

Cassadee rubbed her hands against her temples. She had been getting a lot of shit from people regarding her new article. Jeff refused to go on interviews with her anymore since her discussion of ‘obvious alpha male syndromes plaguing every single aspect of work’ and Lee wouldn’t even look her in the eye.

Her article was only released today.

Of course there had been positives that came to her door step. Her article seemed to have become the pledge of an unknown, but growing feminist action in the country- and she was invited for an exclusive interview for their newsletter.

“That’s rich coming from someone who wanted to seduce me for their company,” she snapped, grabbing her beer from the table and taking a chug from it. Tobias narrowed his eyes at her, she could see the sides of his jaw and mouth tighten, like something was about to snap in him.

“Tobias. Unless you’ve been threatened with sex, don’t tell me how to run my life.”

“I have, Cassadee. Why do you think it took so long for me to start dating someone?” Tobias sighed, bridging the distance between them by placing his elbows on the table.

“Do you really sleep with them?” She asked, noticing the stress of recent news bearing down onto his upper lip. Tobias winced, before running his fingers onto a paper napkin and crinkling it with his fingers.

“On more than one occasions, yes.”

“Do you have any STDs?”

Tobias shot her a dirty look.

“No. Do you?”

“Not that I know of. Most of the time I make them use protection.”

“Same here.”

“It’s ruining us Tobias,” she muttered.

“Maybe not just women.”

Cassadee managed a small smile, suddenly regretting her decision to write that article. She understood that it was a low blow to the politicians- revealing their dirty tricks, but Bill Anderson was the last straw. She understood who the article was specifically targeted towards, but she couldn’t fathom the widespread impact it would have.

She didn’t think OB markers would apply to commentaries too.

“I’ll keep a look out for you Cass.”

“What, suddenly you’re my body guard?”

“Let’s just say I don’t think Derrick will be very pleased with this article too.”

“What does that have to do with anything?”

Tobias shot Cassadee a weak smile, turns it out, it had to do with everything.

~

“I hate to say this but we need to talk.”

“Aren’t we meeting for dinner?”

“No, alone. And I can’t make it for dinner, they scheduled a last minute meeting.”

Cassadee gulped, she didn’t like the sound of his voice and the direction in which they were heading. Even through the phone she could hear the poison that pricked his tone.

“I’ll see you later,” he said.

“Okay, love y-“

Before she could finish, Derrick ended the call.

~

Derrick grabbed his coat, and exited the office, his ears feeling like they were on fire after the last-minute 3-hour meeting. He didn’t like the looks his seniors gave him. They had all read the article, and the meeting was like pouring oil on an open fire.

That look that said that’s your girlfriend, you fix it.

As he walked towards his car, he saw Vincent gloating in his path. In the dark, Derrick was glad he couldn’t see much of his face.

“I told you didn’t I?”

“Pray tell, what did you tell me Vincent?” Derrick snapped, wanting a quick escape.

“I told you she was nothing but trouble.”

“Stay out of this Vincent.”

“I told you, and did you listen?”

“I don’t recall that I did anything wrong, you just don’t like her,” Derrick snapped again. Vincent opened his mouth, then closed it again. Eyeing Derrick with a strange sort of satisfaction on his face.

“Looks like little Derrick is learning the tricks well,” he smiled. Derrick wanted to punch him, but there was no way of silencing Vincent if he was on a roll, so Derrick just walked away.

“Yeah sure, whatever.”

~

“Are you hungry? Did you eat?” Cassadee asked, opening the door to see a very dishevelled Derrick standing in front of her house. He looked at her, in her usual sleepwear and was for a moment blinded by how pretty she looked when she didn’t put in any effort to dress up.

“Who cares, I have food,” she said again, letting him in- watching the way he dragged his feet against the ground, not saying a word.

They were silent as he grabbed the food off the kitchen counter and started eating as she stared him across the kitchen island.

“Is this about the article?” She asked again. Derrick stopped eating and stared at her, suddenly remembering the mess that she had made.

“Oh, so you knew that you screwed up,” he stated simply. He watched as Cassadee froze up, her neck freezing from his sudden comment. He couldn’t help it. Maybe it was the tiring day, maybe it was Vincent’s reminder about Derrick’s promise to a false relationship, but mostly it was that Derrick had remembered reading her article and getting angry.

She had promised not to let their relationship cross into working boundaries, then went to publicly announce that she wasn’t treated seriously in a world of working adults.

It was all so selfish.

“What?” She asked, pushing her hands away from the table top.

“You promised Cass, to keep relationships away from whatever we were doing.”

“What exactly did I do wrong?”

Derrick glared at her, and she returned the ferocity of her glare. Derrick glowered, Cassadee had no idea, she thought she was right.

Throwing a crumpled up piece of the article to her, Derrick scowled.

“It seems that as a female, all I seem to have is sex and love in my bossom?”

He watched as Cassadee flinched from him reading her exact words to her.

“Honesty isn’t warranted like it should be? Sexism is?”

“Can’t interview anyone without having to sodomize them?”

“Stop,” she said, grabbing the paper and tearing it up. She was angry and she was shaking with the reality of what she had just done. She sounded angry, bitter and almost childish in her article. But this was the price of honesty. If no one would do it, who would?

“What does this have to do with us?”

“Everything! Cassadee, people are looking at me different because they think my girlfriend is with me because of some cheap political trick!”

“Then tell them it’s not! You know better than to doubt things between us!” Cassadee felt a brittle energy fill her, suddenly feeling very tired of herself. Derrick grew silent, scowling at her.

“I really don’t know why you’re so worked up about this. It’s not like you don’t know what’s going on,” she continued, bringing her hands across her chest.

“Cassadee, my work means something to me. And I would really like it if you could respect working ethics when you’re out doing your own things,” he spoke, his voice like steel, cutting through the air.

“Well in case you didn’t notice, my work means a lot to me too Derrick. And you just said we shouldn’t let work get between both of us!” She snapped, hating the way he termed her occupation as a ‘thing’.

“But it has gotten between us!” He yelled.

“It would be nice if you could ELABORATE,” she yelled back. This was so stupid, and childish.

“People look down on me Cassadee. It’s bad enough as it is already, being the youngest, but it’s worse if you’re on the edge of looking like some kind of entertainment, some kind of piss joke!” He replied. She took a moment to consider his words, before steeling herself.

“So, you think it’s my fault?” she asked quietly. She didn’t want to know the answer, she hoped that whatever he said next wouldn’t hurt as much as it was already hurting.

Derrick watched her, her arms crossed around her body suddenly moved to look as if she was hugging herself, so that she wouldn’t break apart. There was no sudden need to hug her or to make her feel better, he was just angry. And he wanted things to stop being the way they were, he had hoped it would be less complicated than this. He was doing everything right in his job, but he felt so ridiculous- there must be a reason for his lack of success.

“Tobias was right,” she said again, eyes seizing up, glaring at him.

Cassadee wanted to hit back, and at the mention of Tobias’s name, she got the right response. She watched his neck snap backwards, as if repelled by the idea of his name. He never liked Tobias, at first as a rival in love, but now also a rival in politics. She knew it was something she could never take back. She had lost his trust.

“What did he say?”

“He said you wouldn’t be happy.”

“Fucking hell Cassadee! Is that all he said? Did he also try to sodomize you?”

Now they were just trying to ruin each other. Cassadee felt his words burn her, like hers burnt him. The minute he said it, she felt whatever basis of love they stood on, shatter.

“You still don’t trust me do you?” She asked, her voice cracking. She watched him, feeling very alone. He picked up his jacket, put on his shoes and stormed out of the house.

No, he didn’t.

Cassadee didn’t feel her world crumble in like the last time, she just felt this very strange sensation that told her that something was wrong. She shouldn’t be feeling sad over this, because it wasn’t her fault. Maybe he had a bad day at work, but he took it out on her and she wouldn’t allow him to have the last say in how they functioned together.

~

Cassadee texted him 5 times that day, and 9 times over the course of the next few days, trying to apologize for her cheap, un-classy comebacks. But Derrick never replied. She would classify what happened as sort of a ‘time-out’ not a ‘break-up’, but he didn’t call back, neither did he come knocking on her door like she had hoped he would.

Jared told her it was just what normal couples went through, but Cassadee didn’t believe that’s she should just sit back and wait for Derrick. No, she had to take matters into her own hands.

Clicking her way to the NDP headquarters on a Wednesday morning, Cassadee felt a strange blossoming of empowerment course through her. She was going to fix it, this was an easy dispute to fix. All she had to do was talk it out with Derrick, then go back to writing more sensible articles. It would be okay.

She approached the receptionist, a lady who had rimmed glasses looked up at her.

“Sorry, I’m looking for Derrick Fieldings?” She asked. She noticed the way the lady’s eyes flicked up in interest at the mention of his name. Cassadee cringed inwards, the lady must have known who she was.

“I’m sorry honey, he’s not in today,” she replied back, in a very clipped tone. Cassadee felt her heart sink in disappointment, shrinking back into her shoes.

“It’s alright, I’ll come back another day,” she smiled again, before turning around and walking out the door.

“Miss Adams!” She turned, to see middle-aged man stride towards her. He was mousy, and he walked with some sort of knowing slinking inside him.

“I’m sorry, could I have a word with you?” He asked, his eyes gleaming. Cassadee looked at him strangely, his enthusiasm bothering her. He noticed her hesitant look, before grinning wider- in hopes to placate her.

“No, don’t worry. I’m not like that. I’m Vincent, political supervisor to Sampson Fieldings. You must know him, yes?”