Lonely This Christmas

“4 Calling Birds,
3 French Hens,
2 Turtle Doves,
And a Partridge in a Pear Treeeeeee”

Matt scowled at the applause, firmly shoving his hands in his pockets as he walked past the cheerful people next to him. Stupid carol singers. Who honestly enjoyed strangers bursting into song? Seriously?

“Smile, Flyzik! It’s Christmas!” Jack giggled, skipping alongside him.

“It’s not Christmas for another 5 days yet,” Matt muttered.

Rein it in people, seriously.

Today was one of the rare days the All Time Low band and crew had off while they were travelling. And everyone (not including Matt, obviously) had voted to go to the local Christmas market to soak in the Christmas cheer. Matt would rather be sitting in a warm room watching a (non-christmassey) movie with peace and quiet around him, not chaperoning a dozen overgrown men-children while they ran around in the freezing cold weather. Just shoot him. Shoot him now.

“Oh don’t mind him, Flyzik’s a Grinch, aren’t you?” Alex grinned.

Matt just scowled a little more, making everyone laugh. 1 hour. He’d give them 1 hour before he headed back to the bus. His friends were lucky he was even out here with them – he wasn’t going to risk getting frostbite on his balls to make them happy.

“Leave Matt alone,” Zack frowned.

Alex and Jack just snickered, putting their hands up in surrender, before walking ahead. Matt forced a smile on his face, looking at the burly man next to him. Zack was the only person who ever defended his grumpy moods (and sometimes Vinny when he was really drunk) so Matt was glad that hadn’t changed.

“Thanks, Zack. They seem determined to piss me off more than usual,” Matt sighed.

Zack just shrugged. “No problem,”

Matt’s smile turned to a frown as Zack walked off. Now Zack didn’t want to spent time with him either? Zack always wanted to spend time with him. Wow, he really was a Grinch.

“Flyzik! Flyzik! Come see the reindeer!” Jack yelled.

Matt blushed heavily as everyone turned to stare at the lanky man jumping up and down, waving his arms in the air. For fuck’s sake.

“FLYZIK!”

Might as well get it over with. 1 hour. He could survive for 1 hour.

*

“Boo!”
“Don’t be a party pooper!”
“Don’t be a Grinch, Flyzik,”
“Stay and have fun!”
“How can you not like Christmas?!”

Matt scowled at that last phrase, not enjoying how it repeated itself over and over again in his head on his walk back to the tour buses. It wasn’t that he didn’t like Christmas – he just hated the fakeness of it all. Families pretending to be overjoyed spending time in each other’s company when they barely put the effort in the rest of the year? Crazy decorations with blow-up santas and flashing reindeer that hurt his eyes? Unnecessarily drunk people ranting about peace on earth and their love for mankind?

No thanks. Matt could do without all of that.

Christmas was for peace and quiet and spending time alone with people you loved. Not this overhyped bullshit. It would’ve been nice if someone else saw that too, but obviously not this year. Again, Matt would be subjected to his family’s questions about his lack of love life on the one day he got to spend with them this year. Maybe his mom was right. Maybe if he had someone to spend Christmas with then he wouldn’t be so grumpy. But yet again, this year saw him without a partner, girl or guy, so he would wallow in eggnog until the new year came.

That was a good enough plan, right?

In no time at all Matt was back on the bus, changed into his comfiest hoodie and sweatpants, pouring himself a mug of packet-mix hot chocolate. It was better than nothing. It was warm, if nothing else.

“Flyzik? You awake?”

What the fuck? Was that…Zack?

“Yeah, I’m back here!” Matt called, placing his mug down on the side.

Sure enough, Zack walked down the crew bus to stand in front of him, his nose and cheeks red with cold. He looked adorable. Wait, what? Where did that come from?!

“Why are you here?” Matt frowned.

“Wasn’t the same without you,” Zack said, smiling slightly.

Matt frowned even more, making Zack laugh.

“You’ll get wrinkles if you don’t smile more,” he teased.

Matt blushed slightly, easing his face into a neutral expression. He didn’t want wrinkles. Hell no. That would probably ensure that he was alone for the rest of his life.

“Can I borrow some dry clothes? Grieco and Rian started a snowball fight and once Alex and Jack got involved it was chaos,” Zack mused.

Fuck. Matt knew he should’ve stayed to keep control of them.

“Jeff got them to calm down, if you’re wondering. They didn’t get too out of hand,” Zack added.

Thank fuck for Jeff.

Then Matt remembered Zack had asked to borrow some clothes. Zack wanted to wear Matt’s clothes. That was a nicer thought than it should’ve been.

“I’ve got a hoodie and a pair of sweatpants, but they’ll probably be too small for you,” Matt said, frowning slightly.

Seriously, Zack had really bulked up this year. He looked good. What the fuck?! What was wrong with him all of a sudden?!

“Anything will do,” Zack smiled.

Matt just nodded, heading back to the bunks. He found the clothes and handed them to Zack (seriously, they’d be too small) before leaving him to get changed. He tried not to think about Zack getting undressed behind him as he grabbed his hot chocolate and sat down on the sofa, he really did.

“Thanks, Matt. It’s fucking freezing outside,” Zack said, walking over to the sofa.

Wow, Matt’s sweatpants really hugged Zack’s ass. Wow.

“You okay?” Zack asked, sitting down next to him.

“Yeah, just thinking how I’m going to avoid interrogations from my family this year,” Matt lied, forcing a smile on his face.

“Oh I know, right? Why haven’t you brought anyone home this year, Zachary? Why are you alone again? It fucking sucks,” Zack mused.

So someone else hated being alone for the holidays too? That was refreshing.

“They just don’t get that I don’t choose to be alone. That I don’t want to not bring someone home,” Matt sighed.

Zack just nodded, curling his feet up underneath him, so much so that his knees pressed against Matt’s thigh. That felt…nice. Really nice. He was glad it was Zack he was talking to, not one of his other friends. Zack wouldn’t laugh at him. Zack wouldn’t judge him. Zack would just…listen.

“Hey Matt?”

He liked it when Zack called him Matt instead of Flyzik. Fuck, what was in this hot chocolate?! Damn it.

“Yeah, Zack?”

“There’s mistletoe on the lights above us,”

What?

Matt looked up, frowning when he saw that Zack was right. Fuck. He’d put money on Alex putting it up there. Damn it Alex.

But as Matt looked back down, he noticed that Zack had moved to sit closer to him. A lot closer. So close that Matt could feel Zack’s breath on his lips.

“Wha…”

Zack’s lips interrupted him, pressing softly against his own. Matt inhaled sharply, freezing, because what the fuck?! But Zack didn’t stop, kissing him slowly, sweetly, until Matt shyly started to respond. He didn’t know what was going on or why it felt like he had an electric current running through his veins, but he couldn’t resist Zack’s soft touch. He didn’t want to resist.

But eventually Zack pulled away, fingers shyly toying with the edge of Matt’s hoodie.

“What was that for?” Matt managed to ask, his voice a little more breathy than he would’ve liked.

Zack just smiled.

“Merry Christmas, Matt,” he murmured, before kissing him again.

Maybe he wouldn’t be alone this Christmas after all.