Woman

"Michael's it's been so long since I've been outside. It's good for the child's health you know." the girl says, glowing slightly from the new state her body is in.

"You're fine, just keep yourself busy mate. Open a window." Michael says.

"But Michael-"

"I said you are fine Mia! Now keep yourself busy and bring me a glass of rum."

The girl sighs and huffs. The man stands angry, he looks at her reproachful behaviour, unexpected rudeness even. He takes her hair and slams her head into the wall.

"Keep that sass for somebody else. My woman best behave herself mate."

The girl lies on the floor delirious, her mind spinning. Her hand across her vulnerable stomach.

"I'm going out, don't wait up." Michael grabs his coat and the purse of gold coins and fumbles out the door.

The girl's body screams.

I want to scream, for me, for my paining body that encases my baby.

I wake up with a start. All the memories of the torment encompass my eyes. My body aches remembering the pain.

Matilda runs inside still wearing her her long white night dress and gives me a hug.

"I heard you kicking the wall, are you okay? Have you had another nightmare?"

I struggle to gain my bearing on my surroundings and lean against Matilda uncharacteristically and whisper.

"Send him away." My light voice whispers.

"Your voice sounds shaken, the life is out of it. A-are you alright dear?" Matilda closes and locks the door and rushes back to me.

"Who should I send away? What's bothering you sweetheart?"

Matilda's motherly eyes encompass me in warmth. The way her eyes are brown like Mother's give me such deja vu. I press my face into her shoulder.

"Please send my husband away."

"What are you saying child? No one can hurt you with me, I promise you I will protect you. Just calm down, tell me what's bothering you." Matilda's whispers become almost fanatic.

I take a deep breath and look into Matilda's eyes. She fully surrounds my large body with her arms.

"Matilda, I never told you something. So many things." Matilda looks at me with concern and runs her hand through my short hair.

"Is this something to do with your past?"

"In my past, there's something I never confided in you Matilda." Tears brim my eyes and I cover my mouth as I hiccup.

"Now girl, I will accept anything from you, just please don't tell me you were a streetwalker." Matilda sneers in disgust.

"No I wasn't that Matilda, I was married before I came here Matilda. What I never told you, it's about Michael," Matilda looks at me questioningly. "It's about this other Mike. His wife, she wasn't kidnapped, she ran away and now he's looking for me. I told you my past would come to haunt me!" I drill my words into the quiet morning atmosphere.

Matilda gasps and holds me tighter.

"You mean to tell me, that man, who is looking for his wife, is after you? For my child? Oh for the Creator's sake I won't let him stay for one more moment knowing that you went through all this trouble to get away from him. But why, why is he looking for you? You have nothing to do with him."

"Don't you see Matilda, she ran away. That means I ran away. I'm his wife, it's me. I'm that Mia, I'm the girl who was supposed to have a son."

"You, married? You're only 17!" Matilda looks shocked. I take a deep breath and realize half of what I'm saying is lost to my quiet whisper.

"I had no choice, he was my godfather's son. The only place left for me was their home. No one would let an unmarried girl stay by herself in my cottage. They sold my parents home and kept the money. I was 15 Matilda, what was I supposed to do?"

"So the woman, the girl from his story, she's alright? You're alright?" Matilda's eyes light up.

I wipe my cheeks and a mixture of shoe polish and tears runs down my hands. I nod. Her eyes brighten and she clenches my forearms tightly.

"I'll think of something, I'll get him away from you. I don't know what's made you run from him, but I trust you. I know you." Matilda stands from my bed and kisses my forehead.

I stay hidden in my room. The sun rise from my window encompasses my eyes. Could this be my last sunrise of freedom? Would they be able to stop him from taking me back?

A knock on my door wakes me from my thoughts.

I quickly wrap my arms and pull on a thicker layer on top of my white shirt.

"Michael! Open up mate! We've got an adventure for ourselves today."

I open the door unsure. Standing in front of me Mike's eyes are lit up with excitement, the sheen of sweat on his forehead already prominent in the cool morning air.

"Come on!" Mike strides down the hall and exits the house and I follow to avoid suspicion. Joseph stands outside waiting.

"Boys do we have a day ahead of us. Matilda said that Mike's wife was spotted in town and she's been living here for months! We're going to ask some folks about her and catch ourselves some rascals soon." Joseph's voice booms and his bright eyes switch between Mike and I.

The door of the house opens and closes behind us. The quiet winter morning is fluttering with snowflakes and it makes me shiver.

"Joseph, I need Michael for some work. You and Mike go on ahead darling."

"Ma'am with ever so respect we need to get as many men to help!" Mike grunts.

"Of course, dear. Mike, we have no time to lose. Let's go." Joseph says and pulls Mike towards the horses.

I let out a deep sigh and Matilda and I watch until the two men ride away.

"What's going on?" I breathe.

"Joseph's leading him on a wild goose chase for me. They should be gone at least until sunset. On the meanwhile you and I, love, are headed to the Miltons."

Matilda and I pull on our coats. With fresh hoof prints behind us we walk with ease and peace.

I wipe my running nose on my hand and I pull my coat closer. The snow becomes rain as we reach their home.

Matilda knocks.

"Mrs. Milton whose home?" Mrs. Milton looks us up and down and pulls us inside and looks out the door in both directions.

"Matilda. Michael," Mrs. Milton nods at us both as if we were children who got lost in the snow. "Drink this tea."

She pours us cups of tea and leaves the kitchen. I glance at Matilda and we both take a seat.

"Mother is tea....Michael, Matilda? How lovely to see you both. What brings you to our home in this weather?" All three of us glance outside and see the wet ice covering the glass.

"Elsa, when you brought my child to me I put my full faith in you. I trusted that you were doing what was best. Now I need you to put faith in me."

"Of course Matilda, what do you need?" Elsa says and comes to hold Matilda's hands.

"You need to keep Mia here and keep her hidden." Matilda's eyes are sharp and her voice is clear.

"Matilda, you know that her name is Mia?" Elsa almost freezes.

"I told her." I say.

"Why would you tell her Mia? More people knowing your secret just makes it harder to hide you!" Elsa screams.

"Elsa, I had to tell her, she could see right through me. She didn't believe I was a man for one second anyways!"

"Okay! Okay, but what about Joseph? Does he know?" Elsa breaths out clutching the window ledge.

"No." I say and lower my eyes to my hands. The man who trusted me to be in his family doesn't know the truth.

"Yes." Matilda says and glances at me.

I stare at her.

"He knows?"

Joseph knew all along and he never let me feel any different. He protected me, didn't question me when I didn't take to becoming friends with town men. He let me silently accompany him. He taught me how to fight, to hunt, to fish, to build beautiful chairs, tables, walls from wood. He never made me feel weak when my punches didn't phase him at first. He never dropped my confidence when I couldn't catch him in a match. He always made me feel strong. Confident.

Just like a father should. Like Father always did.

How silly of this to come to my mind, but he didn't ever make notice or comment on my shoe polish mustache and beard. He never offered me a razor either.

"You'll forgive me, right? Mia?" Matilda looks stricken as her brown eyes fill with worry.

I give her a hug.

"It's okay, I'm relieved. If he didn't know it would be hard to do what we have to now." A smile spreads on my stoic face.

"Elsa dear, take Mia to one of the guest rooms," Mrs. Milton says. She pats my head and looks deep into my eyes.

"You are a brave woman." Mrs. Milton grins.

That night I sleep in the same guest room I stayed in for two months a year ago. That was before Elsa helped me get adopted by Joseph and Matilda. Before we would go out into town and I would pose as a ruffian or a gentlemen to get down the mannerisms.

The window frames the farmland and the winter woods block the horizon. The beautiful moonlight shimmers and slides on the floor as the night wears on.

The distant hooves stampeding the ground put me to sleep.