You Can't Save Me Twice

Max looks at his reflection in the mirror. All his piercings are taken out, and his makeup is washed off. He looks like a totally different person, but he doesn’t mind the change of appearance; he feels like a different person. Now, he is a totally different person.

He grips his phone unsurely, debating whether or not he wants to make the call. The phone call could change his life once again, for better or worse, but he can’t decide of the risk is worth taking. Fuck it, he thinks as he dials the numbers on his iPhone, this phone call is going to improve my life.

The wait for her to answer feels long. So long, that for a moment, he’s not even sure if she’ll answer. After the fourth ring, he debates on hanging up so he doesn’t have to hear the answering machine and leave an awkward message. But she finally answers.

“Jennah.” The two syllables were barely audible. He’s so nervous, he feels as though he might vomit. “Jennah,” He says again, more confidently.

“What do you want, Max?” Jennah’s voice is strong, annoyed. Max is the last person she’d ever want to hear from. She didn’t even expect his name to appear on the screen on her phone.

--

“But I’m sober now.”

“Yeah?” Jennah laughs. “That doesn’t mean shit to me. I meant what I said before. Don’t talk to me ever again.” With that, she hangs up.

Max drops his phone on the kitchen counter. Tears prickle his eyes. The one girl he truly loved hated his guts, and he doesn’t understand why.

Things have changed. The situation changed. Jennah doesn’t want him anymore, and that breaks his heart.

----------------------

She hangs up the phone and wanders back to the bedroom, careful not to wake Jimmy up. Her face is surprisingly calm. Tears don’t prickle her eyes, and her breathing doesn’t change. If you looked at her, you wouldn’t even be able to realize she just had a life changing conversation. A conversation she never thought she’d have.

She takes a moment to look at her sleeping boyfriend. She couldn’t imagine life without Jimmy; he’s everything she’s ever wanted plus more. But now that Max called, she’s beginning to second guess her decision.

Sure, a few months ago Max really screwed her over. She could never forget it. When she caught him in the act, he didn’t even have a look of remorse on his face. He didn’t look in any way apologetic, and she could never forget it. He went to rehab to clean up his act, but that doesn’t mean he’s changed. People like that never change.

She heads outside to her front porch and sits on the first step. She grabs a cigarette and lights it. When she takes the first drag, she becomes more confident that she made the right decision. Jimmy is perfect for her, he’s given her everything. She gets to see him every day. He doesn’t live a reckless lifestyle. They’re into exactly the same things. It’s obvious to anyone that he’s a better fit than Max ever will be.

Once the life of her cigarette reaches an end, she smashes it on the ground. It’s so dark outside, the only light coming from the moon. She gazes up at it for a few minutes before returning inside. Hopefully Jimmy hasn’t woken up yet and noticed her absence. She might have to explain what just happened, and she really, really doesn’t want to.