No One Left I Love

I want to say it was a mess behind the scenes of the Chariot portion.

I'd love to say people were screaming.

That they begged for their lives and were crying.

It was the complete opposite.

I heard laughter and saw smiles and was completely confused.

This is the Chariot race right?

No clown in sight if you don't count the few escorts here?

You'd think more victors would seem angry at being forced to kill each other.

I stood by my horse arms crossed feeling the warmth of Kaleb at my side.

"We should make allies," Kaleb whispers and I feel his warm breath hit my ear.

"I won't until I know I won't have to kill them."

The whisper is so quiet I was sure I had only mouthed them.

Something dark passed by and my eyes focused.

A girl no older than eighteen walked by. Her hair was dark looking jet black with a raven colored crown braided in tight. Each individual curl bounced with every stomp and a muscular teenager followed after her with short blonde hair.

Is that the Mockingjay?

Her face seemed etched into a permanent scowl at the moment and with the shadows from the crown seemed more like a goddess of war than a victor.

"Checking out the competition?"

Kaleb's deep timbre drew my attention and my head sharply snapped in his direction.

"Don't know. I have no type."

He chuckles and smiles at me.

"Bull."

My eyebrows raise incredulously.

"Really?" I drawl."Name one."

He smiles wider and points near the door where I recognize the shocking red hair of Ruby.

"You kissed Ruby the first day she yelled at you to appreciate the Capitol on the train."

I sigh and roll my eyes.

"I thought I was going to die."

I tighten my arms and see him smile impossibly wider.

"And when you were fighting with Stacia?"

I stop for a minute to think.

"It made her stop yelling."

"Ysabeau? Aurea? Laveia?"

If I was a dog, my tail would be dragging against the floor and my head gazing at the floor.

I tighten my lips and Kaleb chuckles.

"Angry girls, dude," He shakes his head still laughing. "Scowls, shouts."

I fi[found myself scowling at him and shake my head.

"I have no type. The Capitol 'pays' me to have no type."

This makes Kaleb's smile fall fast and a weathered hand touches my cheek.

"You didn't choose them."

I pull away turning my head near the elevator the tributes come in.

A semi-familiar figure walked out of the elevator with her striking face twisted glaring at everyone and everything.

"I can't believe this," she raged storming past and a long black ponytail with what seemed like red ends swished with every step. "This shit is getting too old."

Her dress was skin tight like mine but made to resemble what looked like green bark and skin. A black corset with the same pattern finished the dress making her creamy skin seem tan.

It really was form fighting.

Her chest was pushed high from the corset and I wondered how she could even breathe no matter how mouthwatering it looked.

Her waist seemed especially small and her hips hollowed in the dress looking like an angered Mother Nature.

I wondered if dress looked just as revealing

I must've been staring because Kaleb poked me making me look up at him and he said all almighty:

"What was that? No type you said?"

I looked away deciding not to dignify that with a response.

"Get off my hair!"

That same voice screamed and I smiled.

"Maybe firecrackers are my thing," I admitted.

Kaleb pushed his shoulder against mine chuckling at how my body rocked and I knocked mine back seeing him stumble a little.

He leaned his head and looked to the left.

Each strand of salt and pepper was so saturated with gel that not one hair moved.

"Why don't you go talk to the Firecracker?"

I shake my head hard and fast and Kaleb laughs again.

"What? Thought you were into her?"

I roll my eyes again and lean against the chariot.

"I'd like to make it to the arena again. Pissing off Johanna Mason just signs my death warrant."

The aging man won't give in.

"Talk to someone. Allies, Aura, allies. A crowd favorite would be nice."

I bite my cheek.

His voice suddenly becomes quiet and low almost too quick to understand.

"We need help."

Help to save Katniss.

Help to stop the games.

Maybe even help to save each other.

I nod reluctantly knowing I'll probably fail this request.

"Go get 'em."

He pushed me hard and I stumble in those killer heels giving him a dirty look before seeing the girl of the hour.

As I walk, I notice the other victors and hold back a grimace.

District 6 is all skin and bones and made my stomach curl. Their skin was yellowed from the morphing and sagged under what little weight they had. What can kill a victor after surviving the Games? Two things: Snow and yourself. You try to cope with every nightmare, every flashback, every sound but drown until you find something that dulls it. You latch onto it and hold on so hard it breaks what you have left leaving you more like a shadow than a person.

District 7 is quiet now. Johanna Mason is quiet scowling beside the chariot talking to her partner. Don't I remember her games? Crying? Carnage? Axes flying through the air?

I flinch when I see District 8 and see the golden haired women. Didn't they say she was a mother? Three children crying. Can I kill someone's mom? Is it any different from killing a sister? Brother? Cousin?

I stopped looking at the victors continuing forward.

Don't empathize, sympathize, even think about them Aura because they won't think about you on the Cornucopia.

The last chariot rapidly approaches and I see the Mockingkay again a vision in coal black.

Her grey eyes look like blue ice surrounded by that kohl and completely focused on me.

Both of her hands touch the closest horse and I grab a sugar cube giving the creature a little treat.

"Girl on fire."

I greet and give her a small smile considering what I'm about to ask.

"Katniss."

She corrects and pets the horse's flank still watching me.

"Can I be honest with you?"

Katniss shrugs her shoulders and I see the leather flex with the movement.

"Can anyone these days?"

I keep my eyes locked on hers as I ask again.

"Can I trust you?"

She falters a little and I remind myself she's still new at this: killing people, alliances, people.

"Depends on what."

Her voice is somewhat hard and I could only imagine what made it that way or if the Game just left more scars.

"I need to keep Kaleb arrive," I answer honestly and touch the horse's smooth face as I continue. "He's smart and strong but not as fast as he used to be. His stamina is shit and he's the closest thing to a dad I have. You fight for the underdog. Can you help me fight for him?"

Katniss withdraws a little from my blunt honesty but leans forward a little as I continue.

"I could help with Peeta. He's a lot like Kaleb: really strong but really loud. If I watch his back, can you watch Kaleb's?"

Her perfectly arched eyebrows rise before she answers.

"Could I negotiate more later?"

I nod my head and sigh as I realize I forgot a key detail.

"This is probably really late but I'm Aura from District 5," I smile at her and see a pink flush creep down from her chest. "Kaleb is the guy wearing the storm grey shirt if you can see him."

Her eyes soften as she sees how much grey is in his hair.

"And how can I talk to you?"

I smile again and start walking back as I hear footsteps approach.

"Ask your mentor!" I call out before hurrying back to my chariot.

This time the walk back is swifter as I try not to hold on to details anymore than I should.

"Who'd you get?"

Those were the first words I hear from Kaleb.

"That's rude," I pout in mock hurt before responding. "Might have the Girl on Fire."

"And what'd you use?"

I shrug my shoulders not wanting to release this real truth yet.

"Honesty," I evade and that's when we hear the announcement.

"Tributes, mount up."

I step onto the chariot and curse as I realize the heels won't even be seen anyway so why am I wearing them?

"Aura, manners," she scolds and Kaleb holds his gut a he laughs.

Ruby seemed to appear out of thin air with her hair in a complicated amount of twists wearing for the first time a color that isn't red.

It's a dark black sheath with a lightning bolt and I blink my eyes when I recognize the design.

"For me?" I ask incredulous. "You told me to keep the designs for the designers."

She smiles for me showing a set of unnaturally white teeth against still red lips.

"You are my favorite."

It's unspoken that I'm her only.

"Look fierce. Look beautiful and remember to stand out," she instructs before the chariot starts moving forward.

I grab Kaleb's hand at the sudden movement and feel him squeeze it in comfort.

The sun is blinding compared to the grey we just came through so my glare is natural as approach.

The theme music plays and we're greeted with the audience's cheers and yells.

Drums are played as we ride forward when I see the people gasp as my dress starts to change.

I blink as the lightning on my dress flashes but doesn't leave as I now resemble the real lightning I'm famous for.

Kaleb's shirt roars and I hold back a grin at the stylists pun.

We circle around and I watch the people with a cold expression that I've become famous for.

It seems too long before we head back and I hurriedly descend trying not to stumble in these death trap heels.

I hold on to the chariot before I feel a warm hand grasp my arm.

"What was that?" She hisses and by the eye makeup reminiscent of tree branches I realize it's Johanna Mason.

"What?"

"You know what. Did you seriously think you could tell her and not get caught?"

I eye her incredulously before shaking my arm to get her to let go.

"Let go," Kaleb's voice is quiet but threatening as I feel his presence behind me.

"What can you do to me old man? Die?"

I bite my cheek before finally grabbing her hand and digging my nails in knowing my 'alterations' made them nearly unbreakable.

"Shit!" She releases with a grimace.

"Keep your mouth shut," I warn quietly and this time Kaleb is the one who's quiet. "This isn't fun and games and death isn't a joke."

"You'd know more than me right?"

I exhale sharply as she references Grey.

"Stay away from me if you want to live," I warn her one more time before walking away.

"How shocking, Thunder and Lightning. If only I knew which one was which."

I ignore her storming off into the elevator hearing Kaleb's footsteps following me.

"Shocking."