Touch.

Staring at herself in the mirror, Lennon sat in her old bedroom at her parents house. It was the only place she could stay at after basically getting kicked out of John's life. She was still shocked by the way he said it, simply telling her not to come back. She just wanted to make sure Jackson was okay; he was one of the people she's known for such a long time and even though they weren't even talking anymore she had the urge to come and see him. His parents were such close friends with her parents and she couldn't just let them down by not showing up. She had to apologize on behalf of John and she begged them not to charge him or take him to the cops.

“Are you okay darling?” Her mom stood by the door making Lennon jump a little as pushed herself away from her thoughts. Lennon nodded her head with a weak smile on her pale lips. She was just out of the shower wearing only her robe and trying to blow-dry her hair quickly but she was taken away by her thoughts that even her hair was starting to get dry by itself. “I... I brought all of your things from John's apartment..” Lennon's eyes widened and she quickly stood up walking towards her mom.

“Why did you do that mom!?” She asked trying to control her anger. She always hated people doing things for her without even thinking of telling her.

“Sweetheart, listen to me..” She leaded her daughter to the bed as they both sat on the edge of it, facing each other. Lennon looked at her mom waiting for her to continue, “As a parent, I honestly don't think you can be with John anymore.. He did something that surprised all of us and made us doubt him.. Sweetie, I don't think I can allow my daughter to live with someone like him. He can do anything to you and I know that if something happened to you I wouldn't forgive myself at all.” She sighed, “I told him that you didn't want to be with him anymore and I took all of your things.” Lennon felt her jaw tightening as she looked at her mom. Why was she doing all of this without even asking for Lennon's opinion? It was her own life that her mom was controlling and Lennon was angry about it. But she didn't say a word to her mom as she waited for her to get out of the room. Suddenly, Lennon escaped into a fit of sobs as she curled her arms around her tiny body, laying on the bed alone. She never thought in her life ever that she would live to see this day... The day she breaks up with John. It made her feel like she was in some kind of nightmare and she would wake up in any minute but she knew that this time she was truly living this nightmare and there was no way she could wake up. The only way to wake up from this nightmare was to move on but she knew that she wouldn't have the heart to do such thing. Or maybe she was only thinking that because she was mentally and physically drained. She couldn't take any other thought as she closed her eyes and sleep filled her lids.

Only an hour after Lennon called John to meet her at Starbucks he quickly picked himself and ran into his truck. As he waited for Lennon to show up, he made himself comfortable and ordered a cup of coffee, sipping the warm liquid slowly as the place got filled with murmurs of people talking and the smell of coffee. Staring at his drink, he couldn't help but think of the reason why Lennon called him up. Was she having second thoughts? Did she want to get back with him? But how was that possible if she was already engaged to someone and their wedding is happening next week. There's got to be something. Suddenly, John's gut was telling him that this wasn't going to be pleasant for the both of them.. Something was going to happen and not knowing killed him.

“J-John?” Her voice made his entire body tingle as he tried to stand up, his legs shaky. He offered her a sweet smile as she smiled back and took a seat across from him. She took her jacket off and lightly brushed her hair away, making it fall against her shoulders. John always remembered how she used to do that every single day, which made him suddenly feel nostalgic. He shook his thoughts away, clearing his throat.

“I wanted to-” they both said the same words in unison without noticing. A chuckle escaped John's lips as he offered her to speak first. Her lips twirled and he noticed how nervous she was, trying to look at anything but him. He stared at her for what felt like minutes until he heard her speak again.

“I wanted to say that I'm sorry for not telling you about Matt..” She took a deep breath, closing her eyes and opening them as she continued, “I-I just.. I want to uh, to clear things between us.” This time their eyes met once again and John could feel a sting of nostalgia rushing through his veins.

“Ye-yeah, I uh.. I wanted to somehow try to tell you that too..” John said.

“I'm g-gonna say what I need to say and... please wait for me until I'm done.” John nodded his head looking at her strangely. It was like she was trying to say something but she was trying to gather up her strength before she can speak. No matter what was it, John knew that he had to brace himself first.

“Okay..” he said, his voice low. Lennon took another deep breath tucking a strand of hair behind her ears.

“I don't want you to get out of my life.” She blurted, as he stared at her wide-eyed, “I... John... I think we.. we should just be f-friends..” Even though their eyes never parted, John moved to another world the moment he heard her say that. Just friends..? How the hell can I do that to the only person I love? I can't be just friends with the person that I've been in love with for the past three years of my life. But as he looked at her, he knew that he didn't want her out of his life.. He would never think of something like that.. He had to do something that wouldn't prevent him from seeing her face at least frequently. He didn't want to get those bad nightmares every single night; it killed him deep down that she was giving him no hope for both of them to get back together once again. Who was he kidding!? There really wasn't any hope for them to get back together.

“John?” He suddenly moved his eyes back to a confused Lennon.

“Huh?” he answered, “Uh.. I- I think.. Yeah, y-yes we can be...” he felt lump in his throat as he tried to say the word, “Friends.” He tried his best to fake a smile as she stared at him strangely.

“Are you.. sure? I mean.. Y-you're okay with that right?” She asked not sure of his answer, he nodded still smiling. She sighed in relief, grinning. She reached for his hand giving it a squeeze. “I thought it was gonna be harder than this.”

Its harder than you think it is, Lennon.John thought. Her hand still touching his lightly made him feel like they're back to the days where he used to call her his, and the days they were madly in love with each other and wouldn't last a day without being together. He wished if he could go back to those days right now and end this nightmare.

“I don't know how to say this but, all I can say is thank you.” She said, a sincere smile on her face. “For accepting this.”

“Y-yeah. it-it's alright.” He said, his words crumbling. He was lying. Every single word he said to her was all lies, but he couldn't say the truth at all. But all he wanted was to stay by her side and at least get the chance to see her. He had no other choice but lie to her.

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John's ride home felt like the longest; he couldn't stop thinking about how Lauren just simply ended everything he was trying to fix in minutes. He didn't want to blame her. He knew that she thought he changed, she thought that he wasn't the same person who was in love with her anymore. She went on with her life because she got sick of waiting for him, but John was only trying to find the right time to get her back. Maybe it took him so much time to figure out how miserable his life was without her. He breathed in as he approached Eric's house and parked his van in front of his door. He knocked on his best friend's door softly, waiting for him to answer. All he needed at the moment was someone who can listen to his complains.

“John?” Eric opened the door, a confused look on his face as he spotted his best friend standing in front of his door. He could see from John's face that something had happened and that it wasn't good at all. “Come on in.” He simply whispered, allowing John to get in.

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“So. Let me get this straight. She called you, and asked you to see her and then she said she wants to be ‘friends’?” Eric asked, shocked by the story John told him. “Man, that's fucked up.” He said, shaking his head.

“Welcome to my life.” John said, chugging from his beer. Eric could notice that his friend already drank his third beer of the night, and he was starting to get worried.

There was a moment of silence, as Eric stared at John quietly waiting for him to say something. He knew that John wasn't the type of people who would give up easily on everything, but seeing him like this made him worry. “What're you gonna do now, then?” Eric finally asked. John picked his head up and looked at the plain wall, his eyes fixed on it.

“I don't know.. I want to do something, but I have no idea what to do,” He spoke, “And it’s killing me that she can run away from this and I just can’t. I can’t- I can’t go out and find someone new because I always think of her.” He ran a hand through his hair, frustration taking over him.

“We'll figure this out, don't worry.” Eric laid a hand on his best friend's shoulder, smiling. John returned a weak smile and mumbled a 'thanks' as he continued drinking his beer.