In a Rut

Perhaps I should begin by introducing myself. I’m Roni, and I’m straight. It’s something nobody understands. It’s feared, looked upon as a health problem of sorts. I could have dealt with it, if it wasn’t for the arrival of Opha.

There are people fighting for heterosexual rights, and there are hundreds of campaigns, but it’s not enough. With science being so advanced, the majority of couples opt for a test tube baby as let’s face it, it’s more enticing (not to mention less tiring) than carrying a baby around in your stomach for 9 months. Even the guys agree, although that’s probably out of sympathy for the women. I happen to live in an area where the hospitals refuse to help pregnant women, as though by touching them they’d become contaminated with the ‘hetero-disease’. Being brought up by my dads, Toma and Nodi, meant that for a long while I had the same heterophobic views and treated all those who’d admitted to their heterosexuality as though they had the plague. But now I’m 19, a grown man, and I’m starting to realise that we live in an incredibly biased world. Surely a little thing like gender shouldn’t dictate who we fall in love with? It’s 3014, and the time for abandoning these prejudices has long since passed.

Anyway, back to Opha. I met her in the paper shop, on my first day of work. Okay, maybe everything’s digitalised now so there’s no need for a paper shop, or indeed any shop at all, but it’s a modest business I run with my dad. There are some people who still like to have their morning newspaper and who are we to deny them one of life’s little pleasures? If you have the money for such a luxury then go for it, I say. Puts food on our plates anyway.

I was working the morning shift, four until eleven, when she walked in. Such beauty radiated from her that I couldn’t avert my eyes, despite the fact that Toma was watching my every move. He’d had his suspicions about my sexuality for a while I’d say, as I hadn’t shown any interest in the guys he’d introduced me to. Not that I had any objections with them but they just... weren’t my type. I was at the desk, fiddling nervously with the papers whilst she browsed our limited selection before picking up a weekly paper and frowning at the front page. Riot in Mumsk, thirty dead. Mumsk was the city closest to ours, and if the riots were reaching them then we were surely next. Many of the activists were choosing violence as a means to stop the heterophobia which flooded the country, but they forgot that the Prime Minister had eyes everywhere. She always knew who’d done the deed and a few hours later they were strung up by their innards outside her house, to stand as a warning against those she saw as traitors. Poor souls.

I was awoken from my thoughts by a loud slap as the paper slammed into the desk, making me jump and blush slightly.

‘Sorry, I couldn’t resist. You looked so deep in thought,’ laughed the girl, tossing her hair over her shoulder. It was the fashion nowadays to shave half of your head, leaving the other half full of luxurious curls. Opha looked the height of fashion, her chiselled features standing out on her rounded face. I thought about my own shoulder-length hair and mentally cursed myself for being so uncool.
‘H-hey,’ I forced the words out, tearing my eyes away from her face and looking at her chosen paper. ‘Is- is this all you’re getting?’

‘Yeah, please hun.’ She flirted shamelessly, and at that moment I knew I was done for. I glanced at Toma and saw he was looking down at the paper in his hands, clearly having lost interest in our conversation. Taking a deep breath, I took a risk.

‘Doyouwantohavedinnerwithme,’ I blurted out, looking at my feet and biting my lip, dreading her answer.

She grinned at me and cocked her head. ‘Sorry, I didn’t catch that?’
I couldn’t go back now. Not if I wanted to look like a fool infront of her. I braced myself and asked again. ‘Do you want to go to dinner with me? We could go to, well anywhere you like really...’ I let out a nervous laugh.

There was silence from her end and I immediately regretted saying it, digging my nails into my sweaty palm and biting my lip. After a few moments, I looked to see her reaction and found that she was staring at me open-mouthed.

‘You... you know the rules-‘ she glanced at my name badge on my jacket ‘-Roni. I can’t. I’m sorry.’
She started backing away, leaving the paper on the desk.

‘No, wait, please. The rules... they’re stupid, you know that. I know that. So please, come on...’ I heard a sharp intake of breath from my side and saw that Toma had approached me without me noticing and was looking furious.

‘Roni.’ His deep voice filled me with terror and I felt my legs begin to shake. I was never the bravest person at the best of times. ‘I’ve told you about this. It has to stop. It’s wrong. She’s the opposite gender to you, for Christ’s sake.’

I couldn’t move. I stared at him, unable to break away from his intense stare and grasped hold of the table in an attempt to stay on my feet. My legs felt as though they would buckle at any moment. When the silence became too unbearable, I whimpered. ‘I’m sorry, I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to,’
Toma said nothing, his eyes boring holes into me, leaving me feeling like I’d been physically injured.
‘What’s going on?’ asked a gravelly voice from the doorway. Nodi. His voice broke the spell and Tomi shot me one last glare before stepping back.

‘Nodi. It’s happened.’