Teenage Dirtbag

t was a lovely Friday afternoon and I was sitting in the cafeteria with Haley, Alex and Tay. Tonight was our second performance, so of course Alex and I had been hyped all day. Haley was working on her laptop preoccupied while Tay was asking Alex questions about the material of the biology test we had today. I wasn’t really doing anything. I was pretty confident I was gonna nail the test. I decided it was time to annoy Haley. I put my hand on the back of her laptop and closed it.
“Jack, you fucker! I’m working on your fucking logo” she exclaimed. “And I’m pretty sure I didn’t save it.”
She glared at me angrily.
“Sorry” I mumbled.
Haley shook her head and opened her laptop again, continuing designing our logo.
“Can I see it?” I asked.
She shook her head again.
“Why not?” I asked.
“Jack, seriously, are you bored or what? Stop being annoying.” she said.
“Jeez, you’ve been so cranky lately” I growled. “Are you on your period?”
She shot me an angry look and focused on her laptop again.

It was true though, Haley had been pretty grumpy the last week and I honestly didn’t know why. I should probably ask her about it later when Alex and Tay aren’t there. I noticed a familiar girl walking past our table, and well, I didn’t have anything better to do anyway.
“Aimee” I yelled, causing her to stop and turn.
She noticed me and came up to me. Alex and Tay had paused their questions, looking at Aimee, probably wondering why I called her over and where I got the guts to do so.
“Hey… Jack, right?” she said hesitantly.
“Yes” I answered.
Wow, she actually remembered my name. I couldn’t help but be impressed she came over her in the first place. I had expected her to just keep on walking.
“Are you coming to our show tonight?” I asked her.
“Uh yeah I think so, Zack really wanted me to come.” she answered.
“Cool.” I said happily.
“Well, I’ll see you tonight then” she said with a small smile.
“See ya” I replied and Aimee walked away again.

I turned back around to find Alex, Tay and even Haley staring at me. In these few days Alex had filled Tay in on my everlasting crush on Aimee and how I didn’t dare to talk to her.
“Who are you and what have you done to Jack?” Haley asked, raising an eyebrow.
I shrugged. “I told you, we had a nice conversation last Saturday. Before you and Alex had to but in on it, that is.”
Haley sighed, shaking her head and returned to her work.
“So, are you actually gonna make a move on her tonight?” Alex asked. “Now that you suddenly have guts?”
“Who knows” I said shrugging.
The bell then rang, meaning we had to go to class.

Haley’s POV
“Haley, wait” Jack commanded, as I was about to get up.
I sighed and halted. Jack waited for Alex and Tay to leave. I looked at him quizzically.
“What’s up?” he asked.
“Nothing.” I answered.
“Really? Because I feel like I’ve been annoying you all week.” Jack said.
“Yeah well, sometimes your overenthusiastism is exhausting.” I shrugged.
“You’ve been putting up with it for 15 years, that’s not what this is about.” he said.
“I’ve just been tired okay? I’m been working on your logo night after night” I said.

That wasn’t the reason though. To be honest, things just hadn’t felt the same this past week and I couldn’t help but blame Tay. I thought it’d be nice to have another girl around, but it wasn’t. I had always been used to having Jack and Alex to myself, which I realize is pretty stupid. I too realize my way of dealing with it by shutting Jack out didn’t make sense either, but I just didn’t feel like talking to him. If I would tell Jack this, he’d just think I’m jealous or something. I don’t know, maybe I was, but I wasn’t about to tell Jack that. On top of that, this day was always a rough one. Today it had been 5 years since my mom’s death. I didn’t think Jack realized that though. I was in the kind of mood that just made me want to lock myself up in my room to listen to sad music and cry, but unfortunately I had to be at school. The further this day dragged on, the more I wanted to go home.

“The logo is almost done by the way.” I said, changing the subject.
He looked at me intensely as if he was trying to read my mind. I felt uncomfortable really.
“Uhm, yeah, I’m gonna go to class. See you tonight.” I said, and I walked away.
When I exited the cafeteria, I almost bumped into Alex, who appeared to have been waiting there, for Jack probably.
“Jack is right behind me.” I told him.
“I was waiting for you, actually” Alex said.
Oh no, I thought. I tried talking to Alex as little as possible; afraid I might say something I probably shouldn’t, or unintentionally lead him on.
“Is that so? Why?” I asked.
“I just wanted to see if you were okay” he shrugged.
“And here I thought that’s what Jack was just doing.” I mentioned.
“I know, but well, he’s Jack…” Alex said.

Oddly enough, I knew exactly what he meant. Jack was great and I loved hanging out with him, but he wasn’t the best listener when it came to deep conversations. Speaking of the devil, Jack came walking out of the cafeteria. He spotted Alex and me, shrugged and went to class. He was probably angry with me.
“So, are you okay?” Alex asked.
I sighed. “I don’t even know to be honest.” I said. “But shouldn’t you be getting to class?”
“Not if you’re not okay, I shouldn’t” Alex replied. “Spill.”
“You might wanna sit down” I scoffed.
“Okay” Alex said.

He grabbed my arm, and led me back to the cafeteria to sit down at a small table in the corner.
“Now spill it” he said, staring at me intensely.
I sighed. “Well for starters it’s just… today” I started.
He looked at me quizzically, so I began to explain my statement.
“Today it’s been exactly 5 years since my mom died” I said.
“She died in a car crash right?” Alex asked.
I nodded. “I can still see everything that happened that day so vividly. I still have nightmares about it.”
“What happened exactly, if you don’t mind me asking” Alex asked.
I was quiet for a moment, realizing I didn’t mind him asking. The only ones I ever told the specifics of the accident were the cops who interrogated me at the hospital.

“I was sitting in the car with my mom. We were on our way home from a nice mother-daughter day full of shopping” I started. “The weather had been alright all day, but just as we were leaving the mall, it suddenly changed. It started raining and storming, but well, that happens more often, so it didn’t worry us. After we had been driving for about five minutes, we got to the highway. We had been driving behind a truck for a while, but suddenly, the truck began to sway heavily and before we realized what was going on, it fell down. My mom couldn’t brake on time and we just drove into the truck, which was still sliding forward. We were both completely panicked. Within a matter of seconds our car came to a stop against the back of the truck with a loud bang. I saw my mom’s head hit the stirring wheel, there was blood everywhere and then everything went black”.
Alex had just been listening quietly.

“I woke up in the hospital four days later, surrounded by my dad, Rachel and Jack. I don’t remember the specifics of my injuries, but it hurt like hell. Apparently they had to operate on me a few times, causing my heart to actually stop beating more than once, but I survived. Once I remembered what happened, the obvious question was of course where my mom was. Nobody answered. They were all avoiding my gaze, until Jack said those five words that changed my life. She died on the spot. I cried for hours, along with my dad, Rachel and Jack, actually. I had to stay at the hospital for a few days, which I didn’t mind. I dreaded going home, feeling my mom’s absence so clearly. Once I did, I just lay in bed for days. My dad and Rachel were dealing with their own grief, but Jack came to check up on me every single day. When he find out I had been cutting myself-“

I paused, looking at Alex. I hadn’t meant to tell him this, and was afraid he would look at me in disgust, but he didn’t. He just waited for me to continue, so I did.
“He made me promise I’d never do it again. If it hadn’t been for Jack, I probably wouldn’t even be here. Which leads me to the other reason I haven’t been having the best week” I finished.
Alex looked at me quizzically. “What has Jack done to you then?”
“He didn’t exactly do something. It’s just, for years I had him to myself. It was always him and I against the world. And then you came along, which is obviously not the problem, because you’re great and I really enjoyed hanging out with the both of you, but…” I answered.
“Then Tay came along” Alex guessed.
I nodded. “I feel like such a baby to be acting like this. It’s not like Jack is my property or anything and I still see him everyday but I don’t know… It doesn’t feel the same…”
“Did you tell Jack this?”Alex asked.
I shook my head. “He wouldn’t understand…”
“Well, you can’t expect something to change if you don’t give him a chance” Alex said, smiling a little. “And hey, whenever you need someone to talk to when Jack isn’t available, give me a call. I’m a great listener if I do say so myself.”
I couldn’t help but smile. “Thanks Alex. For knowing exactly what I needed, and being just that for me.”
“Anytime Hales” Alex replied. “Call me at 3 in the morning for all I care, I’ll be there when you need me.”
I smiled. “You know, I’ve grown quite fond of you, Gaskarth.”
“You’re not so bad yourself either” he winked. “Wanna get out of here?”
"Didn't you have a biology test?" I asked him.
"Screw biology" he said shrugging. "You need me"
I smiled and doubted for a moment, but I figured it wouldn’t matter anyway, I was already very late for class, I might as well just skip it.
“Okay then, what do you suggest?” I agreed.
“Let’s go get some ice cream at the park.” Alex suggested.
“Count me in” I replied, and we got up and went outside.