Teenage Dirtbag

Alex’s POV
When we were just about to sit down at a table Cassadee came up to Jack and me.
“Can I talk to you for a moment?” she asked the both of us.
We looked at each other and nodded, following her away from the group, exiting the bar.
“What’s up?” Jack asked.
“I’m pretty sure Haley has been spiking her drink all night” Cassadee said. “I didn’t know whether I should say something about it or not, so I just thought I’d let you guys know. Like, I don’t know if this is something she does regularly, but I just thought it was strange.”
I looked at Jack. “Does she ever do that?”
“Not that I know of… She’s usually pretty much against alcohol because of her father” he answered.
I figured her sudden drinking might have something to do with her mom, but that still didn’t explain why she was suddenly doing it now.
“I’ll talk to her.” Jack said.
Cassadee and I nodded, and we went back inside.

We had just sat down with the guys when I noticed Haley was missing.
“Wait, where is Haley?” Jack was wondering as well.
Zack, Rian and Tay looked pretty surprised. “She was just sitting there…” Rian said, pointing at the chair next to me.
“Maybe she just went to the bathroom?” Zack suggested.
“I’ll go check” Cassadee said before she turned around and headed for the bathroom.
“What’s going on?” Zack asked. “Why are you so stressed out?”
“Apparently Haley has been drinking all night” Alex answered.
“Well, so what? I mean, I know we’re not actually allowed to drink, but don’t we all do it from time to time?” Rian asked.
“Not when your father is an alcoholic and you’ve experienced what alcohol can
do to people” Jack answered. “I’m pretty sure she never had alcohol before, so I bet she can’t take that much of it. God knows what she’s been spiking her drink with.”
Cassadee reappeared next to us. “She’s not at the bathroom,” she told us.

Cassadee, Jack and I scanned the bar to see if we saw her anywhere, but we didn’t. I took out my phone and dialed her number. It went straight to voicemail.
“I think she turned her phone off” I said.
“Do you think she would’ve actually left?” Rian asked.
“Did she seem normal when you sat down?” I asked.
“Yeah I guess… She has been rather quiet all night though, but that’s all…” Tay answered.
“Yeah that’s probably because it’s been 5 years since her mom died today” I said.
Jack suddenly looked at me, shocked.
“Fuck, I can’t believe I forgot that!” he exclaimed. “That explains why she has been acting so weird all day. I’m such an idiot.”
He looked up. “I know where she is” he said assuring.
He turned around and headed for the exit of the bar. I followed him and caught up with him quickly.
“And where exactly do you think she is?” I asked.
“The graveyard” Jack answered, exiting the bar.
The graveyard wasn’t too far from here so we just kept on walking there quietly.
“She does this every year” Jack suddenly spoke. “Usually sober, but on the anniversary of her mom’s death she goes to the graveyard. At night, because she wants to be alone. She just sits at her mom’s grave talking to her and crying. The rest of the year she doesn’t let herself go visit her mom’s grave, except for this day.”
“Why is she so hard on herself?” I asked.
“Well, some things make you hard, like your mother dying or your father being an abusive alcoholic, I guess” Jack said.

We both fell silent, lost in our own thoughts. I felt sorry for Haley that she felt like she had to be so hard on herself. No one should be that hard or that scared to feel anything at all. No one deserved that, especially not her.
After about 15 minutes we had reached the graveyard. I hadn’t been here in a long time. I used to go there to visit my brother’s grave, but it was mostly just painful so after a while I stopped visiting him. After all, I knew he would always be with me in my heart. As soon as we walked onto the graveyard, Jack went left. He had probably visited Haley’s mom before and knew where her grave was, so I followed him. After walking ahead for a few meters Jack walked into a path, formed by graves on both sides. At the end of the path I saw a huddled silhouette. Jack suddenly stopped, causing me to bump into him.

“What are you…-“ I started.
“Shush” Jack said. “We’ll just wait here. At least we found here, but I’m not gonna interfere with her moment of grief”.
I agreed. We just stood there for a couple of minute, until the silhouette appeared to notice us. She got up and walked up to us. As she got closer we could see tears streaming down her face. I had never seen Haley cry and it broke my heart. She couldn’t walk straight, but I didn’t know if that was because she had drank too much or because she couldn’t see clearly from crying.
“Do you want us to leave?” Jack asked softly when she stood in front of us.
She shook her head. “N-no” she cried.
Jack and I both stepped forward to hug her. She planted her face in my chest while I stroke her hair softly. Jack was just kind of patting her on the back, standing there sort of awkwardly. When we let go of Haley, Jack turned around and walked over to a grave, which I assumed was Haley’s moms. He sat down in front of it. Haley and I looked at each other puzzled, before we followed him and sat down next to him.

“Hey Beth, it’s Jack” he started.
I assumed that was Haley’s moms name.
“I know it’s been a while since I last came to say hi to you, I apologize for that. I just wanted to tell you that your daughter, Haley I mean, has grown into an incredible strong and beautiful young lady, whom you can be very proud of. Though I think you already know that, since you’re probably somewhere on a cloud looking down on her and Rachel, watching their every move.” he continued.
Next to me, Haley began to cry even harder because of Jack’s words. This wasn’t a side of Jack we saw very often. I lay my arm around Haley, who rested her head on my shoulder. I had to admit I was having a hard time holding my tears back myself.
“I also wanted to tell you that you don’t have to worry about Haley. She has been through so much shit over the past few years, but it just kept making her that much stronger. I’m pretty sure she could take anything life could possibly have in store for her and when even she can’t take any more, that’s when Alex and I come in.” He stopped to point at me.

“This is Alex, he’s my best friend and he cares for Haley very much. He and I will make sure she will never have to face anything alone. We can’t make life easier for her, but will do anything in our power to make the best of it.”
At this point I couldn’t hold back my tears anymore either and for as far as I could tell in the dark, tears were streaming down Jack’s face as well. I wasn’t sure if I had to say something too. I hadn’t known her mother so I felt like it’d be awkward if I did. I didn’t need to either, because Jack kept improvising stuff to tell Haley’s mom.

“You might be wondering how I ended up as well. I’m in a band, called All Time Low. That sounds negative, I know, but it’s meant to be ironic. Alex is in the band as well and Haley comes to every single one of our performances, which is two so far. When we go on tour someday, I think I’d have to make her my guitar tech.”
Haley lifted her head and I figured she looked at Jack surprised.
“Yeah Hales, don’t go to college, because once we hit it big, you won’t have time for it” Jack said, smiling lightly.
Haley laid her head back on my shoulder. I figured Jack was out of things to say, so we just sat there in silence for a while. Neither of them seemed to be expecting me to say something, so I didn’t. Jack pretty much said it all.
“Let’s go back, it’s getting cold out here” Haley suggested after what seemed like hours.
“You sure?” Jack asked.
She nodded, wiping her tears with the sleeve of her hoodie. “Yeah”.

We upped and were about to leave the graveyard when I stopped. Now that I was here, I felt like I had to visit my brother’s grave as well. Haley looked at me, but from Jack’s face I could tell he knew what I was thinking.
“Go visit Tom’s grave, we’ll wait,” he said.
I made my way to my brother’s grave, and kneeled in front of it.
“Hey big bro” I muttered. “I know it’s been a while, I’m sorry. It just got too painful to come here too often, but now I was here for my friend Haley, so I figured I had to come say hi to you as well. You have no idea how much I still miss you, every fucking day. But life carries on. I don’t really know what to say. I’m not as good at this as Jack is. Tell all of my pets that have passed away that I said hi. So uhm… Bye I guess… I’ll try to come visit you more often…”
I got up, after taking a last look at his grave and walked back to the exit where Jack and Haley were waiting for me. As soon as I reached them, they both pulled me in for a hug. After we let go of each other, I looked at them thankfully. I needed that.