I Guess I'll Never Get To Call You Mine

“Ah, it’s good to be back!” My brother dropped our suitcases in our room and spread his arms wide like he’s auditioning for the role of Rose in Titanic. “But we’ve been back many times before,” I pointed out. “Well yeah for family reunions or official business or one-day stopovers. This time we’re back for a friggin’ week and we get to PARRTYYY! WOO-HOO!” I rolled my eyes and grinned. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that Randy and I are twins. We’re as different as night and day and we fight a lot, but hey, at least I’ve got someone to drive me around and pay the bills whenever we eat out.
“I made plans with the gang. We’re all going out for the weekend!” Randy said. “The gang?” I said, half-listening as I typed a reply on a text message someone sent me. “Yeah, you know…Pierre, Seb and Jeff? Dave says he can’t make it but he’s always doing weird stuffs on his own, right? Seb said he’s going to ask Chuck today. You coming?”
I hesitated. We’re back in Montréal technically on official business (if you can call just wanting a change of scenery so we can focus on the actual ‘official business’), but there’s no way Randy is going to buy that argument. “Sure,” I said, smiling slightly. Why am I suddenly feeling a little nervous? I could not honestly say we didn’t meet each for a long time, but it’s more to the fact that when we meet, we hardly had time for nothing more than exchange pleasantries. Bands are always busy, either touring or writing new music. Simple Plan, the band my childhood friends formed, and The Youngbloods, a band my four brothers Sean, Marcus, Jay and Randy formed and of which I was kidnapped into joining (I enjoyed it now, but how I joined was quite a story), clashed a lot when we happened to tour in the same country, but we hardly had the time to hang, or let alone have long talks, before being called away for another sound check.
I bend over my phone as if to check for messages. My fingers unconsciously scrolled through my gallery, and through that one photo I always kept saved, the one with all of us in it, back when we were still in the same high school in Montréal. I smiled at the memory. Ah, there’s Pierre with his arm around Randy. They both are great friends; mostly because they’re annoying and they pull pranks on me (and each other) all the time, but we get along really well if we want to (and if he stops trying to set up blind dates for me or push me into a water fountain).
Then there’s Jeff, who attended the same classical music conservatory as I am. I was really into Mozart and Bach and orchestras as a kid (still do) and played mostly classical instruments like the piano and the violin. It was Jeff who taught me what sounds an electric guitar could make. He’s around the same age as my oldest brothers, so he tends to watch out for me like another older brother. Not that my other brothers didn’t, but as the only girl in the family, I get picked on a lot.
My relationship with Sébastien is competitive. We used to have all-night-long video game marathons, contests in who can eat a whole jar of Skippy’s peanut butter the fastest without getting sick, who can collect the most Pokemon cards and build the tallest Lego tower and other crazy stuff like that. We’re both considered kind of nerdy, since we both wear glasses and we like to read fantasy novels and comic books and we love Star Wars. I often joke to Randy that Seb is my real twin brother who got switched at birth by mistake.
David I actually don’t know very well. He’s from Matane and he’s the only one of us from a different high school. Maybe because of that he tends to go off on his own. Like, he does random trips to London and South Africa when not touring, all by himself, or he’ll go on long motorbike rides and not come back for ages. Don’t get me wrong. He’s actually a pretty nice guy. Fun and charismatic, he’s the life and soul of any party. He reminds me of a little kid too sometimes because of his hyperactivity. We don’t talk much when we meet, but I enjoy watching him when Simple Plan played live. He really is quite the ladies’ man.
And then there’s Charles-André, or Chuck, I guess. I actually used to call him Charles all the time until he got sick of it and renamed himself at age twelve. We grew up together, and we remained pretty close until high school. I had to move to Ottawa after my junior year, and our relationship became a little strained after that. We wrote to each other, but by then he was telling me more about how Simple Plan will hit it big. After my brothers formed The Youngbloods communication became even harder. My letters would go unanswered for days, but being the sweet guy he is Chuck always made sure to call me at least once a week to tell about his tour is going. That was before he finally had a girlfriend.
Suddenly, it became like I didn’t exist and when we did talk it was about how amazing she is. Actually, the last time Chuck and I had a serious talk together was when she apparently dumped him and he showed up at my house one night almost in tears. That wasn’t something I like to dwell about. I think they made up and then split up again and last time I heard they’re back together. Okay, my best friend is the one of the nicest and most forgiving person I know but I kind of thought that taking back a person twice is a risky move.
I didn’t realize that I said that out loud. “Well, Ashley’s got nice boobs. Poor Chucky couldn’t resist, that’s why he took her back,” Randy grinned. I hadn’t realized he was peering over my shoulder to look at the photo. “But you’re right. That guy is too nice for his own good. Last time I heard he’s been working out too. Maybe that’s why Ash asked to make up again. His abs must have been—” “Okay I’m not in the mood to talk about Chuck’s abs right now—” “Oh come on Aline, you’ve always had a crush on him.” I could feel my cheeks burning red hot.
“I did NOT. You take that back, Randolph!” I said, gritting my teeth. “What makes you think I like him?” I shouldn’t get flamed up just because my brother accused me of liking someone, but…well…can’t he see we’re just friends? Randy shrugged. “You were always hanging around him.” “It doesn’t mean we’re going out.” “You two could’ve behind our backs.” “But we didn’t.” “Makes no difference. A girl and a guy can’t be just friends.” I rolled my eyes. “It doesn’t mean he’s my one true love, Randolph, that’s just stupid.” “Okay don’t go full name on me I get the point,” he growled. I sighed. What is it with people and their full names? OK, I did think it was better when Jeff decided that he does not like to be called Jean Francois but—
“Do you really believe in that though, Al?” Randy asked. “Huh?” “True love,” he said. “Oh.” He got me here. Unlike some of my brothers or most of my friends, I wasn’t really an outgoing person, and I never really given much thought on dating…or love for that matter. But I’ve seen what it can do. People commit suicide because of a break-up, don’t they? And they say you can die of heartbreak. Chuck got dumped by his girlfriend twice and still took her back. I might have to consider my answer carefully.
“Why do you ask all of the sudden?” I smirked. “Ran out of girls to hit on?” For a moment I thought Randy was going to protest my changing the subject, but he merely shrugged and said, “Not my fault that I am so stunningly attractive.” I snorted. “Yeah, right. They like you only because you sing lead. Try being Jason for a day. No one notices the drummer.” It slipped out too suddenly and I felt a stab of guilt hit me on the chest. Chuck is Simple Plan’s drummer. “I mean, no one notices the drummer as much as the lead singer,” I added lamely. “Good thing too, who would want to see Jason? We should get him bigger cymbals and block his face entirely,” Randy laughed. I smiled weakly, feeling an odd flutter of relief. He still thinks that I’m talking about Jason.