The Outcome of Anger

“Hey, Matt?” Alex called out as he grabbed his keys from the counter.

Matt looked up from his spot in front of the couch where he had their five year old daughter Morgan in between his legs watching Spongebob, “Yeah?”

“I need to run to the store for a bit, you guys wanna come?” Alex asked with a small smile, eyes landing on the little brunette who’s eyes never even left the screen.

“No, it’s okay. I’ll stay here and watch her. I need to get her ready to take her to the park anyway.” Matt said softly as he kissed her shiny brown hair.

Alex bit his lip as Matt turned his attention back to the TV screen. He was always nervous about leaving his daughter home alone with Matt.

I know it sounds terrible that Alex doesn’t feel comfortable leaving his daughter alone with him but Matt lately has been doing great. He’s on medication for his anger issues and a couple mood stabilizers so he should give it a shot.

“Okay guys, I love you!” Alex called out as he began to walk out the door. Neither of them even lifted their heads as they were too caught up in the program.

Alex sighed as he locked the door and walked right next door to their friend Jack’s apartment.
Ringing the doorbell, it took a few seconds before Jack swung open the door. His face, hair, and clothes covered in glitter, “Did Kayla get in the glitter glue again?” Alex laughed as he looked over Jack’s shoulder and saw his daughter screaming and running around with a cardboard pony.

If there was one thing different between Alex’s daughter and Jack’s, it was that Morgan was calm and quiet. She loved to just lay back and quietly color to herself and watch movies with Matt and him while Kayla was well…. Just like Jack. Alex swore the doctors injected her with permanent adrenaline when she was born.

“Isn’t she always in it? Anyways, what’s up?” Jack laughed as he bounced from foot to foot.

“Um, I have to go to the store and I’m still nervous about leaving Matt alone with Morgan. Is it okay if you can like… listen out for them?” Alex asked with a hopeful look on his face.

Jack knew exactly what Alex was talking about. He has known the two his whole life and has seen how terrifying Matt can get. It broke their heart really ‘cause Matt never ever wants to get mad. It hurts him so bad that once he realizes what he’s done, it kills him emotionally.

“Sure man, anything for you.” Jack smiles, leaning over to hug his friend.

“Thanks, Jack. I owe you.” Alex thanked as he started to walk down their apartment stairs to get to his truck.

~

Alex was currently in the middle of Wal-Mart pushing a basket full of Cherrio’s , some milk, eggs, Morgan’s favorite strawberry shampoo, all of their everyday needs.

It was when he was walking down the medicine isle to see if they had any herbal calming medicine for Matt since he hated feeling medicated did his phone start vibrating in his pocket. He pulled it out and frowned when he saw Jack’s caller ID on the screen as he swiped it open placing the phone to his ear,

“Hello?”

“Alex, you need to get home like right now.” Jack rushed out. He could hear banging on the other end of the line and shouting.

Alex’s heart sunk to the pit of his stomach as his mouth dried, “Is it Matt?”

“Yes and I’m trying to open your front door to get Morgan but it’s locked and I don’t know where the fucking key you gave me is!” Jack shouted making Alex forget about the basket and run out of the store full speed, disregarding all of the shouts at him to slow down.

“I’ll be home in five minuets” Alex said shakily as he hopped in his truck and speaded out of the parking lot onto the main road to get to their apartment building as quickly as possible.

~

Alex ran up the stairs, skipping almost three at a time before running down the long hall to get to his
room. He was greeted by Jack banging on his front door shouting trying to get Matt to open the door.

And that’s when he heard it.

The shrill, loud cry, of, “Daddy!”, coming from inside the room.

“I’m coming baby!” Alex shouted as he fumbled with his keys to open up the front door.

It took a few attempts before the front door swung open, hitting the wall with a loud thud.
Alex frantically looked around the living room seeing Matt curled up in a ball, slamming his head and fits down onto the ground screaming profanities.

“Jack, go find Morgan.” Alex demanded as he sprinted into the living room, cautious of how he was going to approach Matt.

“Matt, It’s Alex. I need you to calm down.” Alex said softly, slowly walking up beside his husband.

Matt growled loudly as he started to punch himself in the chest, face, and anywhere he could get his hands on, successfully catching his finger on his lip ring causing it to rip from his lip.

Matt didn’t even seem fazed by the action, just continued flailing his arms and screaming, “Fuck!”

“Matt, I’m coming over, okay?” Alex continued to say calmly even though on the inside, he was far from calm. His palms were sweaty, and his eyes were watering with guilt that he left him here by himself with his daughter.

Alex finally made it to Matt and crouched down, quickly yet carefully reaching for his wrists so he could bind them to the ground beside his head and straddle him so he couldn’t move his upper and lower body, “Get the fuck off of me!” Matt screamed as he thrashed around violently, spit flying onto Alex’s face.

“No, Matt! I need you to calm down! I will get your tranquilizer if you do not sit fucking still.” Alex gritted through his teeth.

Matt’s doctor gave Alex a few tranquilizers after he taught him how to use them only when Matt would get like this where it put everyone in danger.

Matt seemed oblivious to the statement as he kept thrashing his legs around, spitting, causing blood to fly onto Alex.

“Jack!” Alex shouted, arms feeling weak from holding down Matt.

Alex heard a door slam shut and Jack run from out of the hall into the doorway, “Yeah?” He breathed
out.

“Medicine dresser, get the box that say’s Matt’s name and Haldol 25 Mgs and an alcohol pad” Alex ordered with grit teeth as he lifted his hips off of Matt to place more pressure on his wrists, surely leaving bruises.

Jack nodded as he ran into the kitchen, slamming doors trying to find what Alex needed until he chirped when he found the box of needles and an alcohol pad, running into the living room where Alex was still struggling to keep Matt pinned to the ground.

“Okay Jack I’m gonna need your help. I’m going to get off of him but keep my hands on his wrists, okay? When I get off, immediately hop on him and take my place. I need to give him his Haldol.” Alex instructed.

Jack nodded wordlessly as he immediately straddled Matt when Alex slid off of him, replacing his hands where Alex’s was, automatically realizing how much stronger Matt was than him.

“Alex, shit. Hurry.” Jack whined as he struggled to keep Matt down.

Alex ignored Jack as he reached for Matt’s hand and cleaned it with the alcohol pad before setting up the shot of Haldol.

“”M sorry, Matt” Alex mumbled as he placed the needle at a prominent vein on his hand and quickly injected the medication.

It was around three minuets later when Matt’s screaming and thrashing died down to a few jerks and cries.

“Okay, Jack, get off him.” Alex said softly, watching Matt curl up into a ball when Jack un-straddled him.

Matt’s voice was muffled from his face being buried into the carpet but Alex could tell he was crying, “Jack go check on Morgan again. Make sure she stays in her room.”

Jack nodded at Alex’s words as he ran into the hallway to check on Morgan.

“Matt, baby.” Alex said softly, reaching over to smooth Matt’s sweaty, bloody hair out of his face.
Matt looked up at him, eyes bloodshot and rimmed with tears as he crawled into Alex’s lap, breaking down into tears, “S-So sorry”

Alex quieted the other as he rocked him gently in his arms, kissing his forehead, “What happened, baby?”

“I-I don’t know. I was j-just brushing Morgan’s hair and s-she told me she wanted braids and I… I couldn’t do it, Alex! O-Only Cassadee has been able to give her b-braids” Matt sobbed into Alex’s chest, snot flying out of his nose onto Alex’s shirt.

“So that’s why you got angry? Cause you couldn’t give Morgan braids like she wanted?” Alex asked as he ran his fingers over the bruises on Matt’s wrists, kissing them gently.

Matt just nodded, another sob ripping through his chest, “I think I hurt her, Alex!”

Alex’s eyes widened as he pulled away from his husband to stare at him in the eye, “Did you?”

Matt’s face represented a deer in headlights, bottom lip quivering violently, “I-I don’t know.”

“Daddy?” A soft voice came from the doorway of the living room.

“Let me see her” Matt whispered, holding his hands out for his daughter.

Morgan slowly started to walk around the couch, stopping just a few feet away from Matt, “Daddy, are you mad at me?”

A tear rolled down Matt’s cheek before he whispered, “No baby, I’m not mad at you. C’mere”

Morgan ran into Matt’s chest, curling into his lap, “Okay, daddy.”

She looked up at Alex and smiled before frowning, then looking up at Matt and frowned again, “Why do you guys have blood everywhere?”

Matt started crying again when he realized his lip was still dripping with blood and that that’s where the blood on Alex’s face and clothes came from, “Daddy got hurt, okay Morgan?” Alex said softly.

“Is he gonna be okay?” She questioned.

Matt mustered a small smile, wincing when his lip stretched, “I’ll be fine sweetie.”

Morgan smiled and kissed Matt’s nose before leaning over to do the same to Alex, “Can we still go to the park?”

Alex laughed and pulled Morgan in for a hug, “Maybe you could go ask Uncle Jack if he wants to take you and Kayla, okay? Your daddy isn’t feeling good and he needs a nap.”

Morgan pouted for a second before running off into her room shouting at Jack to go get cousin Kayla so they could go out and play.

“Is your lip okay?” Alex asked when the living room quieted down.

Matt reached up and touched the hanging flesh, wincing with a hiss, “No. Fuck.”

“We may need to go get that stitched up, love.” Alex sighed, “and I don’t know if I want you getting it re-pierced.”

Matt silently agreed as he pulled himself up into a standing position, legs almost giving out on him, “Shit, I forget that that shit makes me very sleepy”

Alex laughed and kissed his cheek as he carried him down the hall into their bedroom and sat him on their bed.

“Get undressed and I’ll go call the doctor and set you an appointment so we can get your lip looked at, okay?” Alex said as he chucked a pair of sweatpants in the direction of Matt.

Matt nodded and began to undress himself only to be stopped when Alex peeked his head back into their room, “Hey, Matt?”

“Yeah?”

Alex smiled softly before blowing him a kiss and whispering, “I’m gonna love you through all of this, okay?”