Let Your Heart, Control Your Mind.

The whole family was sitting around the large table, plates empty, bellies full of delicious food. “Okay, now down to business.” Dad Jonas spoke up before following into several minutes of technical stage jargon I had no clue about. The boys nodded and spoke as necessary. “Tomorrow is the show and then you have two days off for the 4th of July, then back on the road by Saturday so we can get to Chicago by the 10th.” He looked at Denise and she pulled an envelope from her bag.
“Room keys,” She explained sliding one across the table as she examined the room numbers. “Here, Kev. Hand this one to Nicholas and,” She checked another card shuffled through the last few. “This one to Alexis.” I could tell by her voice that she knew of the events of this morning. I was ashamed. I stole a peek at Nick who was looking down at his key examining his card extra carefully with pink cheeks.
Joe chuckled from the other side of Nick. He patted Nick on the back three times before speaking loudly. “What’s up with you two?”
“Nicholas we want to talk to you when we get back to the hotel.” His mother spoke before leaving her seat heading toward the door. As people stood and left I stayed still with my head in my hands.
“What’d you do?” Joe was no longer laughing, or joking, but sounded serious as he stood. Nick and I left our chairs giving each other a look before Nick spoke.
“Frankie. He walked in on us, um,” He paused, but could not finish before Joe clasped his shoulder.
“Brother! Congrat-.” Joe smiled with a slight chuckle.
“We weren’t doing that, jeez!” I exclaimed placing my hands on my hips. This was so Joe. He filled the stereotypical second child role, the rule breaker. “Just a little heavy kissing.” I left it at that.
“Well sorry for the premature congratulations then. Not as rebellious as I thought. But, they wouldn’t care about that. There is something you are not telling, big brother Joe. Give it to me.”
“Well, I wasn’t exactly fully clothed.” I admitted with my head low.
“High five then, bro!” Joe held up his hand, but Nick didn’t respond.
“Jeez, Joe, you perv. It was just my shirt.” He dropped his hand and nodded.
“That’s not too bad. Frankie is usually a tattle tale. Youngest kid and all. Good luck with angry mom. Pre-warning you are not going to get much time alone the rest of the summer. Believe me. I’ve been through this before.” He stepped through the door and out into the sun.

I stood outside the door as Nick entered his parent’s room. I know it was wrong, but I stood close to hear the conversation on the other side of the door just faintly. It was hard to distinguish most of the words.
“You are an adult so we aren’t punishing you, but we just want to remind you that we made promises to her parents that nothing inappropriate will happen while she is a guest of ours.” The conversation faded out for several minutes.
“Nicholas, we understand that you really like her. We just want you to keep your head in this situation.” I could not hear what came next. “Alexis has a bright future and-“
“Nothing was going on!” Nick’s voice came loud and clear.
“No, but something very well could have. Just be careful. That’s all we ask. She was only allowed to come because we promised to keep a close eye on her. Make sure she returned to her parents as is.”
“She is young. She doesn’t have a lot of experience with relationships. She is impressionable. I don’t want you making any mistakes.”
“I wasn’t planning on it. Nothing was happening. I don’t know what you were told, but-“
“That she was on top of you half naked, Nicholas! That’s what we were told. Don’t make that out as nothing! Just be careful, okay? That’s all we want. I don’t want to go home to tell the Carters’ that their daughter is pregnant or something! We will not do that to them, Nicholas.” It had escalated to yelling so I left the door to find my room. Once inside, I sat at the edge of the bed with my head in my hands for the hundredth time today. Alexis you need to keep your head. You need to start being a little more responsible. I scolded myself for several minutes before the reckless half of my brain took over again. But, you did enjoy it, Alexis, you cannot deny that. You wish that the door hadn’t of opened. You wish it had just continued. The pit of my stomach burned as these thoughts rolled through my head. I fell back into the blankets and stared at the ceiling for what seemed like an hour before a knock sounded at my door. I grudgingly stood and walked toward the door as I straightened out my clothes. I opened the door to Nick who looked run down. Without a word I wrapped my arms around him for a long hug before leading him into the room shutting the door behind us. We laid on the bed in silence for several minutes in silence before he spoke.
“Did you hear any of that?” I nodded and sat up against the head board.
“A little bit. I’m sorry. I was a little out of control this morning.” He frowned slightly as he looked up at me.
“Don’t blame yourself for this, Lex. I,” he stopped, “just have a really have a really hard time keeping it together with you. I kept it in for so long.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “It’s difficult to reel it all in when there is just so much…” I moved against his chest.
“I know how you feel.”