Poison Arms

“Alright Kellin. Your turn.” The teacher said calling me to the front of my class to do my presentation. I walked to the front of the crowd nervously picking at the pocket of my skinny jeans. I gave the USB to him and then waited for my presentation to appear on the board. When it actually worked I sighed a bit.

“So as you can see here, my presentation is about physical guilt and how it can affect you.” I rambled on about something that was completely useless for this class. According to the teacher, physical symptoms of guilt were important to learn about in drama because it had to do with Macbeth. Bullshit. It was all bullshit. I hate being in front of people more than anything. Finally, after what seemed like a good hour of presenting the bell rang. So I made my way to math with Vic right beside me. He was making a lot of jokes, and I was laughing hysterically. Then I bumped into some kid on accident.

“Hey! Watch it!” the kid said stopping in his tracks. “What the fuck are you laughing at?”

I noticed I was still smiling and quickly stopped. “N-nothing. Sorry.”

“Yeah. That’s right better be sorry.” He said threateningly.

I turned back to Vic and smiled. “So you were saying?”

Just as Vic was about to speak, the kid did. “No wonder you came from a crazy house. You’re a fucking loony toon.” He said. My jaw fell to the floor and I stood there staring at him in shock. How did he even know that? I haven’t told anyone. Not even the people I live with know. I didn’t want them to know. I didn’t want anyone to not, and now he’s gone and shouted it.

“I’d like to know the name of the asshole that’s disrespecting me.” I said stepping forward.

“Jeremy and don’t worry. I already know all about you, Kellin.” He said smirking.

“Look, I don’t know what I did to you to make you so upset at me. If it was because I bumped into you, I’m sorry.” I said rather quietly.

“You’re on my turf.” He said.

“Okay, well Jeremy. Can I have your permission to go to school here?” I scoffed.

“Just watch it.” He said pushing past me.

“For fucks sake, what does he expect?” I laughed and nudged Vic’s arm. We laughed about it together.

“Let’s get real for a sec. What he said back there, um I didn’t-don’t want anyone to know.” I said keeping my head down and staring at the floor.

“It’s okay. We all have a past. Besides, I don’t think you’re a loony toon.” He said sweetly. I smiled at his understanding. Throughout the whole day I kept thinking about any slip ups that could’ve happened. There’s no way Jeremy could’ve known that. No way. It’s not possible. I haven’t even so much as spoken about Forest View since I got here, didn’t care to.

I ran straight to my room when I got home. I told Vic to check in for me so Mrs. Kendra wouldn’t be worried. I looked around my room for my phone and found it on my nightstand.

“Hello?” Brittany answered.

“Hey Britt! How’s it going up there?” I said.

“Cold!” she laughed. “What about you? How’s the teenage life treating you?”

“It’s..interesting.” I searched for the right word. “Today this kid Jeremy called me a loony toon, and he said that it was no wonder I cam from a crazy house.”

She laughed. “Quinn you did come from a crazy house!”

I smiled at the thought of her always lightening the mood.

“Yeah, well the thing is I haven’t told anyone I did. I’ve barely thought about it since I got back. I’m confused about how he knew.”

“Research maybe? It could be a hallucination, you know like the little visions your always having.” She said.

I quickly defended myself. “No, no, no. It can’t be. I haven’t had a single one since I was released.” I lied and then I heard a beeping on the other end of the phone.

“That’s me Quinn. I’ve gotta go. Call me sometime and let’s gossip, deal?”

“What’s with you and deals? Ha, but okay. Deal.” I agreed. “Love you, bye.”

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“Can I come in?” I knocked on Vic’s door.

“What’s the password?” I heard him say from the other side.

I chuckled. “Uh, I don’t know.”

“That’s not an acceptable answer, sorry.” He yelled.

“Hi, I’m Vic and I’m a loser who still does secret knocks and passwords. Did I mention I have a tree house in the backyard and my favorite movie is Spy kids?”

Vic opened the door and laughed. “Ooh, someone’s witty.” He said inviting me in.

I walked over to his bean bags and plopped down on the tie dye one.

“So..about today.” I said opening conversation.

“Like I said, it’s fine.” He said.

“Did you already know?” I asked curiously.

“No. I figured something was up though. I mean, a kid gets off a bus from Michigan; doesn’t ever talk about where he came from or his family or his past. That’s kinda mysterious and suspicious don’t ya think?” he winked.

“I guess you have a point.” I looked away. “So, you wanna know what really happened?” I asked him. He nodded and got comfortable on his bed.

I took a deep breath and began telling my story. “Well, I had parents, obviously. They were great. They raised me just like a normal kid. They tried to pretend I was normal, but I’ve always had issues. Anyways, I started having hallucinations and hearing stuff when I was about 6. I remember being dead asleep and then I’d wake up to this thing just hovering over me.” I shivered at the thought. “It scared me so much as a young child. It took me a couple years to catch on, but eventually I figured out that it was deemed harmless. All it ever did was hover. So then I began talking to it and it tried teaching me things. It said that if I said ‘yes’ my whole life would change for the better. I never really knew what it meant, so I kept quiet, but one night me and my parents had gotten into this huge fight and I was so angry. All I wanted to do was get out of that house and chase after something better. I ended up saying yes and I remember being filled with this rage and then I ran downstairs to tell my parents something was wrong and there it was. It was killing them; stabbing them over and over again. Blood kept squirting everywhere and I was screaming. Eventually one of our neighbors called the cops. I tried to tell them that it wasn’t me, but no one believed me. They put me straight into Forest View, which is a mental health institution. I stayed there for almost 8 years and now I’m here.” I said looking at the ground, afraid of what kind of reaction Vic would have.

“So, you’re okay now?” he said.

“I still have hallucinations. Sometimes they’re really bad, but please don’t say anything. I don’t wanna go back.” I pleaded.

“Secret is safe with me.” He said zipping his mouth shut.

“Thank you.” I said leaning in to hug him.

He wrapped his arms around me gently and held me for a little longer than normal. I pulled back a little so that I could see his face. We were centimeters apart. I could feel his breath on my lips, and I saw him drift from my eyes to my lips. I bit them a little and Vic leaned in a little closer. Our mouths were practically touching. I let out the breath that I’d been holding in and clenched the back of his shirt. Then he pulled back and stood up.

“We should probably work on our homework.” He said laughing nervously. It was really cute, honestly.

“Right. I’m gonna go. Uh thanks for listening. Thanks for everything, really.” I said awkwardly and then I exited.

Truth be told, as much as I wanted to kiss him, it didn’t seem like he wanted the same thing. Then it dinged on me. He’s probably not even gay.