Phoenix from the Flames

Phoenix Rising
She feared his touch
Because it left her powerless
But her closed eyes had visions of an unrequited love
A mesh of perfect gears
Drawn together by an engineer
She shudders at the thought
She knows it's true and that it's beautiful
But she still runs away
Unsure of why but sure of everything
Her journey plagued by remorse
But extinguished by her pride
A delicate but brash volley between the what-ifs and could-haves
Unrequited love against unrequited guilt
A battle of a lifetime
Death the champion
---------------------------------

I've been having nightmares. They are filled with images of a girl without a face. She eerily reaches for me, and I shudder when her skin touches mine. She traces ice cold circles in my skin with her lifeless fingers, calling my name without a mouth, without an orifice for speech. She begins to sob, tears erupting from imaginary ducts and her nails sink into my skin as she draws my body closer to hers. I scream and thrash to no avail, and my mind wakes up to a cold sweat.

I'm not sure why these nightmares insist on visiting. All I ask for is a lonely slumber, a vacation for my constant mind. These sleepless nights have left me in dire need for coffee, or sleep-in-a-mug. I don't treat myself to much, but I always make room in my wallet for coffee shop money. I grab my keys and venture outside to my old truck. The slow, wise, rumble of the engine coming to life puts a smile on my face, and I begin the micro journey to the Jaded Java House.

- - -

The aroma of a deep brew creeps into my nose as I take a step into the cozy and ambient establishment. The room is empty albeit a tiny table in the corner that is occupied by a tiny brunette and a large Moleskine. I greet Jade and Jason, the two baristas behind the counter, with a soft and tired smile.

"John, haven't seen you in a few weeks. You look like you could use the usual lift. 16 ounce dark roast with no cream and two pumps of hazelnut?" chirps the raven-headed Jade.

I nod. "You know me all too well. How have you been? I just got back from tour a couple weeks ago."

"We've been doing quite alright. Speaking of tour, have you met our niece, John? She's really into the local alternative music scene. Her name is Phoenix and she's staying with us while she's finishing up school here. Actually, that's her in the back corner, as usual," Jason spoke as he expertly poured my drink and handed it to me.

Phoenix? I thought. No way. Just a coincidence. She's not even from here.

"I have yet to meet her. I didn't even know you had a niece!" I exclaimed with a tender smile.

"Phoenix, come meet John. He's a big one in the music scene here," Jade cooed.

The brunette's head bobbed up from its intent stare down into her notebook. As she turned to look at me, I couldn't help but to lose myself in her round eyes, dark like the coffee I held in my meager hands. Her lashes were full and fluttered as she calmly scanned my face.

"I know who you are. John O'Callaghan. I really enjoy your music," she replied.

I couldn't help but feel flattered. She seemed so cool and collected; most girls who knew who I was were giddy and starstruck.

"Well, I genuinely appreciate that. I love writing and I love when it's enjoyed by others," I grinned.

She smile a soft smile before returning to her Moleskine. What was she reading? Did she write? I cleared my throat to catch her attention.

"So, uh, do you write any?" I asked, awkwardly trying to keep the conversation alive.

She paused for a moment before looking back at me.

"I guess you could say that. Not like you do, but yes."

I nodded and smirked. "Cool. I'd love to read your work, sometime."

She smiled coyly. "You probably already have."