Only Colours

When they returned to the kitchen Finn wasn't there anymore. That was... good? Mikey was fairly sure that was good. Wiley was eating cupcakes and Mikey’s mum was annoyed. Mikey focussed on her until she solidified.

"Where's Finn?" Jude asked, voicing the question Mikey still wasn't comfortable asking. Finn was an island in all of this, one thing it mustn't touch.

"I sent him home," Wiley said around a mouthful of cupcake. "He was admirably resistant, but he's pretty much a mess of vulnerabilities when it comes to that kid." He waved a hand in Mikey's direction. "Not exactly hard to get him to storm off in a huff."

Mikey didn't like that Wiley had gotten rid of Finn by being mean, but perhaps it had been the only way. So much had been kept from Finn and Mikey could understand him wanting to know more.

"You could have been nicer about it," Mikey's mum told him.

"Yes, I'm sorry about Wiley’s behaviour," Sal said. "You'll have to excuse him, he's had a bit of a rough day."

There was mild exasperation in her colours, but she didn't seem overly annoyed at Wiley. Either Wiley behaved like this frequently or she just didn't care that much.

"It's good Finn has left, though, because as he isn't family I'm able to share less information with him," Sal added.

"Would you like some coffee?" Mikey's mum offered. The shift of her colours now that she was talking to Sal suggested she much preferred Sal over Wiley.

"Yes please," Sal said.

Mikey's mum's colours were full of anxiety and hope as she poured Sal's coffee. "I have to admit, I'm quite nervous about this whole thing. I mean, I always knew something was strange about Mikey, but military secrets? What is this, some experiment gone wrong?"

Sal took a sip of her coffee. "While we don't fully understand the original source of the genetic abnormalities in your son and others, I can assure you that nobody alive today is responsible for them. This is more a matter of... Well, your son is different in a certain way that's rather harmless, but others have differences that can be dangerous. It's not so much that we think there would be panic if this went public, though there is that. The main issue is that these dangerous parties would prefer to remain a secret and to do that they must show a certain restraint in the harm that they do. If remaining secretive was no longer an issue, they would no longer need to show any such restraint. Do you see?"

Oh. And... and suddenly, suddenly Mikey wasn't so worried about these people. He wasn't so bothered by Jude getting involved with them even if it was terrible and dangerous. Their rules were like his own rules. Secrets because the truth could be dangerous, because not knowing kept people safe. Because if they didn't think you knew they would be more likely to leave you alone.

Of course now Jude was well and truly in the group of people who knew and there probably wouldn't be much hiding that. But... at least Mikey could understand what they were doing and why. At least they weren't being stupid about it.

"That makes sense... in theory," Mikey's mum said. "But there was a man a couple of years ago, was he with you...? Anyway, he said one of Mikey's friends was dangerous. Did that have something to do with this? Was that why Mikey could see him? But... I find it hard to believe that that boy would have hurt anyone."

Just the mention of the man had Mikey's gut tightening with fear, and then twisting painfully when she brought up Zion. At least she didn't believe what the man had told her. Not now, if she ever had.

"Ah, yes... he is with us, but we don't exactly see eye to eye," Sal explained. That was bigger than she made it sound if the ripple of worry than ran through her colours was any indication. Her face showed no sign of it, though. "I honestly don't know the full story with that boy, but I suspect you were lied to about him. Jude...?"

Mikey didn't like that they were involved with the man, that now Jude was too. He didn't like it at all. But... somehow the man hadn't gotten to Jude the way he had Mikey. Maybe he couldn't?

Jude shook his head, and the amount of rage that stirred up in his colours surprised even Mikey. Something had happened, Mikey was instantly sure of it. Jude had been angry at the man after their first encounter, but this was fresh anger that burnt brightly. Theories ran through Mikey's mind like lightning, but he didn't like any of them so he pushed them away.

"That man is far more dangerous than Zion ever was," Jude said firmly. "We're going to do something about him, though. He won't be working with us much longer."

The danger in Jude's voice was obvious enough, but his colours... Mikey had never seen them quite that agitated before. It was scary. Jude hadn't really been violent in years, but from the look of his colours... Which wasn't exactly good, because the man was dangerous. He didn't want Jude trying to fight him. Mikey knew there was nothing he could do to stop it, though. Jude wouldn't walk away from that kind of hate.

"But as he is dangerous and we have him to contend with for now, I would of course never suggest bringing your son into any situation involving him," Sal told Mikey's mum. "Maybe after he's gone, though, he might be interested in taking on a position with us. Not anything that would threaten his safety, of course, but I understand that finding a job elsewhere would be particularly challenging for someone with his unusual impairment. We, however, could make use of his skills."

Mikey frowned. It would have been nicer if she'd mentioned that to him instead. If it really would be safe, though... Mikey could be with Jude. There would be other people he could see. He wouldn't have to be a burden on his mum for her entire life. And... he knew she would die one day, that she would die before him and what then? He knew he needed to find his own place in the world.

"You keep saying 'skills'," Mikey's mum said. Hopeful, suspicious, scared. "His impairment is obvious, but I can't think of any skills he has that the military could use."

"He's rather full of secrets, and I'm sorry, but he's old enough that it's up to him to share or not share that information with you. I would hope he does decide to, and it will likely necessarily be revealed to you eventually, but for now I've said all I can."

Mikey liked Sal a little better for that. She had kept her promise, respected Mikey's decision.

"Then I suppose it's up to him to decide whether he wants to work for you," Mikey's mum said. "And Jude, of course. You seem very nice and you seem to genuinely care about my son, but I've known Jude for a long time now so it's his judgement of the situation that will decide my position."

Perhaps Mikey shouldn't have liked that they were leaving him out of a conversation about himself, but he did. He didn't want to talk about this in front of so many people. He didn't want to talk about it at all, with anyone, but... listening to the conversation was hard enough.

"I know for a fact that everything Sal's told you is true," Jude said. Of course he did, and so did Mikey, because Mikey could see their colours. Mikey knew they didn't mean him any harm.

And he did trust Jude. He'd let fear make him forget that, make him think that Jude would make a stupid decision that would endanger them both. That was unfair, though. He'd known Jude for years, and Jude had always been sensible. Jude seemed to know more about these things than Mikey now, so why should Mikey assume he was still in a better position to decide what was the right or the wrong thing to do?

Mikey's mum nodded. "I'll have to talk to Mikey about it."

"Thank you for being so good about this," Sal said after finishing the last of her coffee. "I understand it must be difficult not to have all the information when it concerns someone you care about so much. We'd better get going now. Jude, are we driving you home?"

"No, I'll stay. I think I should talk to Mikey some more." He turned to Wiley. "Can you pick me up from here in the morning?"

As much as Mikey had hated this whole talking about things business, he was relieved that Jude was going to stay. If it was just the two of them, Mikey thought he could probably deal with a bit more talking. There were some things he wanted to know.

"Will there be cupcakes left?" Wiley asked. He was... interesting. Mikey was curious about what he was like when he wasn't too drowned in negative emotions to feel much of anything else. The few times Mikey had been watching him, his colours had hardly stirred.

Jude glanced over at the containers housing the cupcakes. "Yes, but I'm not sure Mikey'll give you any more after you were mean to Finn."

Normally Mikey might have held a bit more of a grudge for that, but he was glad Finn had been sent away. Besides, Wiley was in such a bad mood that Mikey could forgive a lot. Jude had certainly been mean to both he and Finn at times when he was unhappy. "He can have more because he's sad and they make him happy. Maybe he'll be nicer if he's happy."

"Yeah, that could totally happen," Wiley said, then held his hand out and waggled his fingers in the direction of the cupcakes. "One for the road?"

Mikey got him one and Wiley even said thank you. Mikey had been right, the cupcake did push back the negative emotions overwhelming Wiley just ever so slightly. Of course that didn't necessarily mean it would make him nicer, but he had a lot of bad feelings and the world tended to be better if there were less of those.

Once they had left, Mikey took Jude up to his room. He knew his mum would have liked to talk to them both, but the only person he wanted to talk to just then was Jude. He directed Jude to lay down on his bed and then curled up in his arms. There was a time when Jude would have vehemently objected to that kind of contact, but Mikey had broken him to the point that he now actually found comfort in it. Mikey figured Jude hadn't gotten a lot of physical comfort growing up, and he'd just had to get used to it.

"So this whole thing is sort of complex." Jude's voice was soft and tired, and his breath tickled Mikey's ear. "I don't really know how much you know, so I guess I'll just start from the beginning. The things Sal was talking about, the bad things, we call them demons. That doesn't mean much since we don't actually know where they come from."

"I think I've seen them," Mikey said. "They don't have colours. My psychiatrist told me they weren't human."

"Yes, that's right," Jude said. "They're really dangerous and all they care about is hurting people. Some of them look like humans and some of them look like really fucked up animals."

That was new. "I haven't ever seen the animal ones."

"I guess they're more likely to hide. They can't blend in. Anyway, so that's where people with abilities, like you and me and Zion, come from. When demons breed with humans. Zion's father was a demon, but you and me have far less demon blood in us. Well, assuming your dad wasn't one, but from what I've heard that doesn't sound likely."

Mikey made a small sound of agreement. The little Mikey's mum had told him about his dad, the little she'd known from spending just one night with him, suggested he wasn't a bad man at all. She'd said he was nice and kind and considerate.

"Anyway, so this whole thing is... kind of a mess," Jude continued. "The man who came and talked to us about Zion, McCartnnon, he can manipulate people's minds to make them think he's telling the truth and to make them do what he tells them to. That's what he did to you. I'm immune, so I was able to give Wiley and Sal a heads up about that and now we're going to do something about it."

"Isn't that really dangerous?" Mikey asked.

"Mmm," Jude said. "Yeah, but it's important. He's the guy in charge there and he's hurting people. He has a bunch of kids, half demons like Zion, locked away. He has them killed when they reach eighteen. I know you don't like me putting myself in danger, and trust me, I don't like it either, but this is important."

"It is," Mikey agreed. He didn't want anything to happen to Jude, but... kids. They would be kids Mikey could see, too. "Is that why he wanted Zion?"

Jude let out a breath against Mikey's ear. "Yeah. He didn't find him, though. Nobody knows where Zion is."

"Maybe that's good," Mikey said. "I mean, for now. While everything's still dangerous."

"Yeah, I guess it's better than a lot of alternatives," Jude agreed. Mikey couldn't see Jude's colours, not when they were lying so close together, but he didn't need to. He knew how much the loss of Zion had hurt Jude, how much it was still hurting him. He gave Jude a squeeze, the most comfort he could offer in the face of all that.

"I just..." Jude paused. "When he left he was still just a kid. He's smart and he's tough so I'm sure he's found a way to manage, but I just..."

"I miss him too," Mikey whispered, and his voice shook. They never really talked about Zion. It hurt too much for both of them.

Jude's hand raked through Mikey's hair. "I feel like I let him down. I don't know what else I could have done, but he was just so lost. He didn't know what he was."

Mikey didn't cry often, not when anyone was looking, but he couldn't help it then. He was so worn down that thoughts of Zion were enough to break him. Tears leaked from Mikey’s eyes and soaked into Jude’s shirt and he took in quiet, gasping breaths, his emotions clawing their way out of him against his will. He wasn't sure the raw spot Zion's absence had left inside him would ever heal.

Jude pulled Mikey closer against him and rubbed his back. "Sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

Mikey sniffled. "S'okay. You can keep talking about him if you like."

"No, that was all."

Whether that was true or not Mikey didn't know — he couldn't see Jude's colours — but he didn't argue. "Tell me about something good. I want to know something nice."

There was a moment of silence while Jude thought. "Well, I think some of the abilities people have are pretty cool. Would you like to hear about those?"

Mikey nodded his head against Jude's chest. "Mmm."

So Jude told Mikey about Wiley's ability to see the future, about how amazing it was when Sal healed injuries. He told Mikey about a man who could move things without touching them and how one of the kids could make fire.

They talked until they had nothing left to talk about and then they fell asleep, wrapped in each others arms. They hadn't done that in a long time.

When Wiley came to pick Jude up the next day, Mikey gave him a whole container full of cupcakes. Nobody would appreciate them as much as Wiley did, so he might as well have them.

Wiley's colours had settled a bit since the day before, but there was even more fatigue in them now. He probably hadn't slept well. His colours were still unusually steady. Mikey wondered if that had something to do with his ability.

"Why do you wear sunglasses?" Mikey asked him. He'd followed them out to Wiley's car so he could see Jude off.

Wiley smiled and slid his sunglasses down to reveal his eyes. They were light grey and had something that looked like mist churning across their surface. Mikey grinned. Jude hadn't told him about that. He wished he had cool eyes like that. His were just dark blue. Then again, Mikey probably had enough weirdness he needed to hide without adding something visibly apparent to the mix.

Wiley pushed his sunglasses back up to cover his eyes and turned to his car. "Come on, Jude. We don't want to be late for another exciting day at work, do we?"

Jude groaned and opened the car door. "Can we have a boring day at work? Please?"

Wiley smiled broadly, but it didn't touch his colours. "Haha, no."