Striptease

She felt nervous. Ugh, she hated feeling with way when it came to Ben. The feelings that were brewing for a couple of weeks are never ending. Butterflies kept interrupting the numbing sensation she wanted to have as she prepared to get ready for the wedding she is invited to.

Ben is picking her up or so he promised when the last time they saw each other and that day she swore she had off, well one of her sisters had a mental breakdown. So it rendered her from seeing Ben that day and she had to cancel on him. She could hear the hint of sadness, but concern as well for her sister. Margo pushed that aside saying it was only a nasty break up and she had the responsibility of consoling the poor woman.

Still, the ever gentleman wished her sister well and spoke highly of when they will see each other another time. As he casually inputted that idea in her head she almost forgot to get him a present for his birthday.

How can she almost forget? It almost seemed impossible because Ben is always in her mind and how he never hinted towards his birthday like any other human being just made her fall deeper into that hole. She digresses, it was difficult finding him the perfect gift or one that screamed Benny. Margo grew frustrated when she went shopping and settled for a gold encrusted watch.

Wincing at the neatly wrapped gift on her bed, her eyes focused on the mirror again as she curled her hair, tousling them for effect. She knew Ben didn’t crave fancy gifts or cared much for it considering how sweet and generous he is. He’s probably one of those people that rather have people buy gifts for the homeless or children to give to charities.

Not that she minded that, but she rather get a gift from at least the people she are close to. She will treasure those and hopefully he will love the watch.

Exhaling deeply, she twisted her hair before tucking it in, a few tendrils cascading down her face as she quickly pinned the rest. Margo always had to remind herself to go more natural for events like this instead of glamor. The glitter eye shadow for instance, smirking at the cosmetic, she pushed it aside before continuing.

As she is doing the final touches, she murmured to herself what Lee said to her not long ago. Ben needs to be reminded this is nothing more than two friends going to a wedding. Nothing more. It would be devastating to see Ben get his hopes up because she agreed to something as innocent as a wedding guest for two.

It didn’t take long for Ben to arrive after that. Her preparations took longer than she thought, furrowing her brows at the clock before realizing she spent double the time on getting ready. “Well there goes getting a snack before then.” She mumbles.

Snatching the gift from the bed, she made her way to the front door. Opening it wide, she smiled as her heart thundered in her chest feeling the eyes of him raking over her body. It took him a moment to compose himself, “Wow. You look terrific.”

“Thank you and happy birthday, Benny.” She took a step embracing him with one arm and kissing his cheek for good measure. Margo ignored the soft blush on his cheeks as he showed his gratitude for the acknowledgement, but grew puzzled when he saw the present within his vision.

“A gift…for me?”

“Duh.” She smirked, wiggling the present towards him more. Urging him to take it. “Open it.”

Once he took it in his hands never in her life as she felt so nervous. Usually she didn’t care if the person liked it or not. Most gifts she gave were expensive and for the most part because of that, they awed. This time, Ben didn’t have the reaction silently staring at the expensive watch. His fingers lightly grazing it.

“Thank you. I love it.” Those honest words let her breathe as she observed him placing it on his wrist before embracing her. His eyes darted away from hers the moment they connected, “Shall we get going?”

“Sure. Let me get my coat.” Cursing mentally at the awkwardness that remained in the air as they spoke to one another; it appears that their connection runs deeper than she anticipated. She will have to work harder for him to relax and hopefully doesn’t gawk at her too much because for the first time she wore something that hid her chest and her legs for the most part.

Her coat draped over her arm, she easily linked her other arm with Ben’s. Escorted to his car, the trip out into the countryside is a little easier than when they first saw each other. Slowly she started to unravel him as she teased him endlessly how lavished he looked in a tux.

One that is so easy to read, he blushed hardly saying a teasing word back to her. “You still deserve a cake and a party.”

“Meh, it’s fine that I don’t have one. I have many more to come, but weddings are once in a lifetime…or preferred to be.” He chuckled when she gave him a side-glance. Ben couldn’t see the wheels turning in her head, he deserved one regardless of what he says. A man with a heart of gold should have everything he ever wanted.

Margo isn’t blinded that he is human; he has his flaws and is aware that he can have jackass moments, none that she has seen so far. The woman hopes that she rarely sees it if any; she will be lucky if it never happened.

When they peeled to the small church, she raised her brow at the large white tent a little ways off. From a glance she catches an eye of chairs and white table covers. As her heels touched the grass studded ground she looked around seeing groups of people gathering, chatting amongst themselves. Shutting the door behind her, she made her way around to have Ben’s hand eased onto the middle of her back.

A friendly smile on her lips when Ben introduced the few people he knew from the crowd. Names and faces blurred together as she wondered if the gang was going to make an appearance. Leaning into his ear, she whispered, “Are your friends coming?”

His crystal blue eyes shot her a look, “No. This is one of my acting mates.”

Nodding, she’s alone then. If Ben is to ever stray away from her to catch up with the groom or the bride for that matter, she will lose her purpose of being there. She is here to keep everyone from thinking that Ben is in fact alone; he didn’t want pity and especially on his birthday.

Watching the group of people line up to enter the church, they soon followed tight smiles on her part as the stuffy room suffocated everyone for the better part of the hour. Margo attempted to pay attention or partially care, but how could she when she didn’t know anyone aside from Ben?

The bride looked unbelievably beautiful, makeup can do wonders and enhance the beauty one has. The simple white dress tight around her breasts and torso while her back is exposed to have wandering eyes land on her backside. The groom is beaming…they both look utterly happy. Is there another word that is greater to describe happiness? She didn’t think so or couldn’t think of any.

Overly sweet and emotional, hearing sniffles in the crowd everyone applauded when the duo kissed, walking down the aisle hand and hand. Margo nipped at her dress to fan herself a bit only feeling a bit disgusting having trickles of sweat drip down her back.

Walking beside Ben she did see the several glances thrown their way and more came her way when they were told their assigned seats. The once look over as a fake smile appeared on the woman’s lips when she saw Margo is the plus one. Refraining from rolling her eyes at the façade, she smiled right back. Walking into the large tent, the pure colors of ivory blinded them along with crystals making seem like a winter wonderland than the blazing hot sun outside.

Blinking at the white dance floor that will easily be streaked with shoe marks by the end of the night, she avoided it not wanting to face the wrath of a newly wedded bride if she ever to accidentally mark it. “This is…nice.” She complimented, Ben gave her a knowing smile. Of course he knows when she’s lying and ever the gentleman, pulled her seat out.

Thanking him, she felt him push her in a bit too much. Leaning back she scooted back when he glanced elsewhere watching as the people continued to file in. “Quite a space, eh? More people show up to the reception. Typical.” She continued with her comments as her friend smile widened.

“They anticipated it as much. Always happens, but as long as the people do show that’s all that matters…for Celia. Nothings worse than a cold meal that is already paid for.”

“Can’t those servings be eaten by someone else that did show? Seconds if anyone wants any?” Margo never saw the appeal of leaving paid food uneaten. But just as she expected, Ben gave her an incredulous look.

As a smile beckoned on her lips seeing her silly reaction he smiled too.

Time flew by as the bride and groom walked around to greet everyone and slowly making their way to their table. Margo noticed how close she is to Ben she gave herself a bit of space between, she tilt her head up to see the chirpy tone of the bride. Sparkling white smile and flawless milky skin, she raised her hand to greet her.

“Ben, I didn’t know you and Misty broke up?” Her devious eyes eyeing up the blonde as Margo delicately took the bride’s hand to shake.

“Sweetheart…” Her husband murmured cautiously, hugging her form close to him. She shrugged her shoulders, her eyes darting between Ben and Margo.

Ben cleared his throat as he introduced them to one another, cutting into the tension that is clearly settled on Celia who is a little high-strung when it comes to gossip. Margo still the polite guest, nodded towards them, “It’s nice to meet you, Celia, Asher.”

“Pleasure is ours.” Asher smiled nicely.

It’s obvious that it takes Celia to warm up to someone or perhaps spending so much time and energy being friends with the ex that she didn’t want to make the same effort again. Despite her not being with Ben only here as the plus one, it did get on her nerves that Celia is giving her the evil eye.

Leaning towards Ben as the bride and groom walked away, she smirked “Someone loves me.”

“She never likes anyone she first meets. It will take time.” Ben paused as he caught himself; why would it take time when they aren’t together. Blushing, he corrected himself, “Only because she thinks we are together. If she known we’re friends it wouldn’t be a problem.”

“I don’t buy that.” Margo not for one second didn’t think Celia or anyone else for that matter will accept her whether she and Ben are friends or more. When he looked confused, music blaring for the first dance, she leaned in closer. “All of your friends are overprotective of you. Any woman you bring into your life will be tested severely to make sure you come out unscathed.”

The man beside her sat in shock, pushing off those feelings of disappointment and disbelief. “I can protect myself just fine.”

Regardless of the unspoken rule of Margo stating that she wanted to protect their friendship she felt it is the time to voice it now. Just as the words stretched out between her lips, the dance floor soon opened up and one of their friends brought Ben to his feet whisking him away.

Pursing her lips as she observed the two dancing or rather the petite brunette bouncing in circles around Ben, she chuckled with a twinge of jealousy. She is already aware of her feelings, brushing them aside as usually and happy that they haven’t grown. The petite woman or girl she couldn’t tell with the roundness that beckoned her to think she is in her university years, short brown curls of innocence and a bright red lip smile.

He looked delighted to be there with her, hugging her and twirling her about whenever it called for it. Biting her lip, she finally felt like the outcast. The girl that is left against the wall because she’s taller than all the boys, her teeth decorated in braces and acne dotting her cheeks and forehead.

Remembering those years she took her glass of wine, downing it in one go before lifting herself up to get another. Once she received another glass full she wandered into the hall again, walking in the edges of the tent as most people were on the dance floor. Bringing the glass to her lips her eyes catch the loving eyes of her friend, the one that made her palms sweat and grin like a love-struck preteen.

It’s only a crush, she reminded herself.

What woman wouldn’t be swept away by his charms, gentleness and wit? He’s not the best looking man not by a long shot, but the quality of the man is more than any man she’s ever met.

Raising her glass to him, he made his way to her. Target locked and he got closer and closer. Her eyes wavered as he finally came a breath away from her, enclosing the glass with his hand before taking her to the dance floor leaving the wine on a table.

Margo furrowed her brows curious as to what this man is up to be brought back to the moment hearing soft cooing music. The beating neon lights were replaced with different tones of white, couples cuddling close together. Peering up at him noticing the smiling face, “It would’ve been rude not to invite my plus one onto the dance floor when a slow song came on…and also apologies for leaving you alone. It was never my intention.”

“What? No, don’t be sorry. Today is your mate’s wedding and your birthday. You deserve every ounce of happiness. It doesn’t need to involve me every second of it.”

“What if I want it to?” He took that damn leap of faith, diving into the unknown and hoping for the best possible answer. Her eyes getting watery and devoting herself to him except she couldn’t see herself doing that without hurting him in the end.

The blonde sighed, pressing her cheek against his collarbone, “You shouldn’t. It’s not wise to solely spend time with one person.”

Ben tightened his grip, “I enjoy spending time with you. Is that wrong of me to want you to myself?”

She dare not look at him, holding him close as she brought her lips to his cheek. “I only want what’s best for you and us together as a couple…it won’t be healthy. I know myself more than anyone and out of anyone I don’t want to ruin you. The have hurt people, Benedict and I’m scared that our friendship will end because of me. I rather have those deeper feelings run dry and continue our friendship than advance it in any way.”

Her heart pounded as she spilled the whole truth; yes she wanted more. There is a huge part of her that does and it will develop into something more if she ran with it. Yet she couldn’t. The better part of her expected that she will destroy him everything is always perfect before she fucks it up.

Margo feared happiness when it came to a relationship; when everything is going right she had to ruin it for the sake of her sanity. To let him know that she is telling the truth, she let herself look into his eyes as she said, “I will ruin you if we ever have a relationship.”

And Ben couldn’t accept that, looking in every speck and corner into her soul hoping that she believes that this is special and different than her other relationships. She stood solid. Letting out a breath, he croaked, “You’re scared.”

“I am.”

Brown eyes mixed with blue as he revealed a part of his soul to her that night that still echoed in her mind. “So am I, darling and who gives a fuck?” And to that she had no answer.