You Had Me at "I Hate You"
31
"LINC!" I shouted, sticking my head out of the window.
I looked down onto the street below, and saw that top of Lincoln's head bob in and out of view between the crowd of people on the sidewalk.
"LINC!"
He ignored me, and moved towards the curb, raising his hand in the air to hail a cab. I slammed the window shut and hurried towards the door, planning on doing anything to stop him from leaving. If he went, then he wasn't coming back any time soon.
"Where're you going?" Gavin asked, upon seeing my shell-shocked face.
The bunch had moved in from the patio. They were now crowded on the couch.
Everyone had their pairs. Everyone had their partner. Gavin and Julia, Jesse and Massia... Me and... Nobody. Linc and... Nobody. Well, nobody, unless Harry Potter counted.
I shook my head. "Linc-"
"Go," Jesse interrupted me. "Hurry."
I nodded curtly and ran down the apartment stairs.
Linc was just getting into a yellow taxi when I reached the street. I was still in my house-shoes... I probably looked like a crazy homeless woman.
"Lincoln Ferguson Fletcher!" I screeched, using his full name. "Hold it right there!"
He took one look at me, scowled, and then slammed the car door shut. I pushed past people, shoving a business lady, and elbowing a fat man in the gut, to reach the cab before it took off. I yanked the door back open.
"I'm going wherever he's going," I told the driver, who shrugged and nodded.
"Violet, get out," Linc sighed. "I want to be alone."
"Too damn bad."
"Violet! Get out!"
"Drive," I told the cabbie.
"No!" Linc protested. "Don't go anywhere until she gets out. You can leave the meter running."
The driver sighed in annoyance, but obeyed.
"Drive!" I whined and pushed out my lower lip. "Pwease?"
The cabbie snorted in laughter.
I sighed, and tossed a twenty dollar bill over the seat.
"Wherever address he gave you," I instructed. "Take us there."
Greedily, the greasy cabbie snatched the bill off the seat beside him and took off like a rocket.
"Violet!" Lincoln hissed. "I told you-"
"Yeah, I know. And I said, 'Too damn bad.' Remember?"
"I want to be-"
"Alone. Got it. Too damn bad."
He slammed his fist on the cushioned seat. "God, Violet! Can't you just listen to me for once?"
I was silent. I folded my arms across my chest.
He put his head in his hands. "I told you I didn't feel anything either, okay?" he muttered. "And I meant it. So... Let's just leave it. We'll pretend like nothing happened."
More silence on my part.
The car stopped in front of a park. Linc had once told me that he used to go here as a kid. A long walkway, lined with wooden benches, led into the park. It was a gravel path, surrounded by a sea of grass. Eventually, it led to a playground.
He got out of the cab. Before shutting the door, he leaned in and pleaded. "Alright? Conversation over... Okay?"
I sat in the cab for a few seconds. Then, I paid the driver and, slowly, exited the car as well. I followed behind Linc, mulling a few things over. He kept looking over his shoulder at me, and then speeding up, trying to get me to leave him alone.
"You know that I'm not going to stop following you until you tell me the truth, right?" I called after him. He continued down the gravel path, walking towards the deserted playground.
"Linc!" I shouted. "Get over here and talk to me right now!"
Finally, after a moment of hesitation, he turned and sat down on the nearest park bench.
I walked up to him, taking the seat to his left.
"So..." he said, clasping his hands in his lap.
"So..." I repeated. Then, after a few awkward seconds, I said: "Why did you lie to me?"
"Huh?"
"I know you felt something... With the kiss..."
He blushed. "I told you that I didn't."
"Bullshit."
He laughed. "What?"
"You heard me! Bullshit!"
He looked away. "Okay... I lied. I liked it."
"How much?" I teased.
He tried to hide a sad smile. "More than you'd care to know."
I turned my gaze towards the ground.
"So," he continued. "Tell me why you lied."
"I didn't lie!" I scoffed.
"Whatever," he said, narrowing his eyes.
"Honest! Linc... I'm sorry to say that I was telling the truth!"
He threw back his head and laughed.
"That is a load of crap and you know it!" he replied, poking me in the stomach, and causing me to squirm. "You love me!"
"Linc," I scolded, seriously. "Stop. I was telling the truth-"
"Impossible!" he shouted, throwing his hands into the air. "I'm irresistible!"
I rolled my eyes.
"There's something between us, Vi... You know it..." he said, nodding his head.
I sighed. "Linc... Really... The only reason I agreed to kiss you was so that I could prove there was nothing between us."
He chuckled. "Oh, there's tons of stuff between us!"
"Like what?" I cried. I was getting annoyed now.
"Air!" he shouted, and grabbed my hand, lacing my fingers through his own.
I wormed my hand away, scowling. He laughed again and placed two gentle fingers on my cheek.
"Now there's nothing between us," he told me.
I slapped his fingers away. "This isn't a game!"
"But it could be!"
"Cut it out!" I shouted, growing angry. "The only reason, and I mean only reason I kissed you was to get you to leave me alone! I thought that if I told you how I really felt, then I could end this tension between us. I only did it so that I could prove to you that I didn't feel anything!"
He wasn't smiling any more. "Impossible."
"Really?" I said with a cruel laugh. "Impossible?"
"Yes. Impossible."
"Brilliant, Lincoln. Just brilliant! Enlighten me!"
"It's impossible because I felt something."
"That makes no-"
"Let me finish. I felt... I don't know what I felt... But there was something. And if one person feels something, then there must be something."
I sighed. "Maybe that's what you want to think-"
"NO!" he shouted, right in my face. "IT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO THINK!"
I blinked in surprise.
"You constantly tell yourself that you don't like me! You constantly tell me that you don't like me! But that's only what you want to think! If I felt something during that kiss, Violet, it was because something was there! People don't make up feelings like that! I can't fake that!"
I was stunned into silence.
"Kissing you made me happy! Okay? So goddamn happy that I wanted to puke!" he shouted angrily. "Look at me! I'm the happiest effing person on the planet!"
"Linc-" I began, but I was interrupted.
"So tell me..." he seethed. "Tell me the truth. Because this is your last chance to find out what will happen. After this... It's just a dim memory. A "What-If." After this it's gone."
He took me by the shoulders. "Did you feel something during that kiss?"
So I told him. I told him the truth.
"N-No..."
He dropped his hands, and nodded his head. He began blinking his eyes a lot...
"I'm going home," he said quietly.
And, with that, he got up to hail another cab.
I looked down onto the street below, and saw that top of Lincoln's head bob in and out of view between the crowd of people on the sidewalk.
"LINC!"
He ignored me, and moved towards the curb, raising his hand in the air to hail a cab. I slammed the window shut and hurried towards the door, planning on doing anything to stop him from leaving. If he went, then he wasn't coming back any time soon.
"Where're you going?" Gavin asked, upon seeing my shell-shocked face.
The bunch had moved in from the patio. They were now crowded on the couch.
Everyone had their pairs. Everyone had their partner. Gavin and Julia, Jesse and Massia... Me and... Nobody. Linc and... Nobody. Well, nobody, unless Harry Potter counted.
I shook my head. "Linc-"
"Go," Jesse interrupted me. "Hurry."
I nodded curtly and ran down the apartment stairs.
Linc was just getting into a yellow taxi when I reached the street. I was still in my house-shoes... I probably looked like a crazy homeless woman.
"Lincoln Ferguson Fletcher!" I screeched, using his full name. "Hold it right there!"
He took one look at me, scowled, and then slammed the car door shut. I pushed past people, shoving a business lady, and elbowing a fat man in the gut, to reach the cab before it took off. I yanked the door back open.
"I'm going wherever he's going," I told the driver, who shrugged and nodded.
"Violet, get out," Linc sighed. "I want to be alone."
"Too damn bad."
"Violet! Get out!"
"Drive," I told the cabbie.
"No!" Linc protested. "Don't go anywhere until she gets out. You can leave the meter running."
The driver sighed in annoyance, but obeyed.
"Drive!" I whined and pushed out my lower lip. "Pwease?"
The cabbie snorted in laughter.
I sighed, and tossed a twenty dollar bill over the seat.
"Wherever address he gave you," I instructed. "Take us there."
Greedily, the greasy cabbie snatched the bill off the seat beside him and took off like a rocket.
"Violet!" Lincoln hissed. "I told you-"
"Yeah, I know. And I said, 'Too damn bad.' Remember?"
"I want to be-"
"Alone. Got it. Too damn bad."
He slammed his fist on the cushioned seat. "God, Violet! Can't you just listen to me for once?"
I was silent. I folded my arms across my chest.
He put his head in his hands. "I told you I didn't feel anything either, okay?" he muttered. "And I meant it. So... Let's just leave it. We'll pretend like nothing happened."
More silence on my part.
The car stopped in front of a park. Linc had once told me that he used to go here as a kid. A long walkway, lined with wooden benches, led into the park. It was a gravel path, surrounded by a sea of grass. Eventually, it led to a playground.
He got out of the cab. Before shutting the door, he leaned in and pleaded. "Alright? Conversation over... Okay?"
I sat in the cab for a few seconds. Then, I paid the driver and, slowly, exited the car as well. I followed behind Linc, mulling a few things over. He kept looking over his shoulder at me, and then speeding up, trying to get me to leave him alone.
"You know that I'm not going to stop following you until you tell me the truth, right?" I called after him. He continued down the gravel path, walking towards the deserted playground.
"Linc!" I shouted. "Get over here and talk to me right now!"
Finally, after a moment of hesitation, he turned and sat down on the nearest park bench.
I walked up to him, taking the seat to his left.
"So..." he said, clasping his hands in his lap.
"So..." I repeated. Then, after a few awkward seconds, I said: "Why did you lie to me?"
"Huh?"
"I know you felt something... With the kiss..."
He blushed. "I told you that I didn't."
"Bullshit."
He laughed. "What?"
"You heard me! Bullshit!"
He looked away. "Okay... I lied. I liked it."
"How much?" I teased.
He tried to hide a sad smile. "More than you'd care to know."
I turned my gaze towards the ground.
"So," he continued. "Tell me why you lied."
"I didn't lie!" I scoffed.
"Whatever," he said, narrowing his eyes.
"Honest! Linc... I'm sorry to say that I was telling the truth!"
He threw back his head and laughed.
"That is a load of crap and you know it!" he replied, poking me in the stomach, and causing me to squirm. "You love me!"
"Linc," I scolded, seriously. "Stop. I was telling the truth-"
"Impossible!" he shouted, throwing his hands into the air. "I'm irresistible!"
I rolled my eyes.
"There's something between us, Vi... You know it..." he said, nodding his head.
I sighed. "Linc... Really... The only reason I agreed to kiss you was so that I could prove there was nothing between us."
He chuckled. "Oh, there's tons of stuff between us!"
"Like what?" I cried. I was getting annoyed now.
"Air!" he shouted, and grabbed my hand, lacing my fingers through his own.
I wormed my hand away, scowling. He laughed again and placed two gentle fingers on my cheek.
"Now there's nothing between us," he told me.
I slapped his fingers away. "This isn't a game!"
"But it could be!"
"Cut it out!" I shouted, growing angry. "The only reason, and I mean only reason I kissed you was to get you to leave me alone! I thought that if I told you how I really felt, then I could end this tension between us. I only did it so that I could prove to you that I didn't feel anything!"
He wasn't smiling any more. "Impossible."
"Really?" I said with a cruel laugh. "Impossible?"
"Yes. Impossible."
"Brilliant, Lincoln. Just brilliant! Enlighten me!"
"It's impossible because I felt something."
"That makes no-"
"Let me finish. I felt... I don't know what I felt... But there was something. And if one person feels something, then there must be something."
I sighed. "Maybe that's what you want to think-"
"NO!" he shouted, right in my face. "IT'S WHAT YOU WANT TO THINK!"
I blinked in surprise.
"You constantly tell yourself that you don't like me! You constantly tell me that you don't like me! But that's only what you want to think! If I felt something during that kiss, Violet, it was because something was there! People don't make up feelings like that! I can't fake that!"
I was stunned into silence.
"Kissing you made me happy! Okay? So goddamn happy that I wanted to puke!" he shouted angrily. "Look at me! I'm the happiest effing person on the planet!"
"Linc-" I began, but I was interrupted.
"So tell me..." he seethed. "Tell me the truth. Because this is your last chance to find out what will happen. After this... It's just a dim memory. A "What-If." After this it's gone."
He took me by the shoulders. "Did you feel something during that kiss?"
So I told him. I told him the truth.
"N-No..."
He dropped his hands, and nodded his head. He began blinking his eyes a lot...
"I'm going home," he said quietly.
And, with that, he got up to hail another cab.