Fixated
13.
This is the part where I had to admit that I couldn’t do this alone anymore. I sat at the kitchen table trembling with one of Mrs. Hudson’s shawls draped around my shoulders limply as she firmly clasped one of my hands. I heard quick, heavy footsteps racing down the stairs; I braced myself for the unknown. Sherlock’s silhouette loomed at the door frame causing me to instinctively tense up. I didn’t know what the outcome of this would be at all.
“Oh Laura, what an awful mess...You look terribly peaky; do let me know if you’d like a sugary tea-”
“Mrs. Hudson, I’ll take it from here. Thank you.” Sherlock said sombrely as he haltingly stalked into the kitchen.
“Alright, dear. Let me know if you need anything…” Mrs. Hudson said as she gave my hand a last comforting squeeze and stood up to leave the kitchen. Sherlock crouched down so he was looking at me eye-to-eye.
“A fire?” He threw it straight out. I nodded slowly, flashbacks still looping through my mind, I knew not to even question how he already managed to know. “There’s soot in your hair and you smell like you’ve just come out of a smokehouse, also the remnants of gasoline on your hands...What happened, Laura?” I managed to force a half-hearted smile at his insistence to show off at the worst given time possible.
“I needed space so I went to stay with a...colleague. Th-the stalker somehow planted a bomb inside her flat and threatened to detonate it if I didn’t leave. So of course I left as quickly as I could. She’s fine as far as I know... he just wanted me out of there. I went back to my place and...it was all just burned to ashes. Everything I own has been destroyed.” I blurted out, my voice shaking.
“Oh…” Sherlock said calmly. Why wan’t he responding?! Did this not constitute as something important to him at all? I needed a response, I needed comfort; I’d lost everything and my sanity was escaping me almost as rapidly as my home burned down. I unexpectedly gave up and burst into a flood of tears.
“I’m fucking terrified, Sherlock! I’m alone, homeless, most likely jobless. I have absolutely nothing!” I managed to choke out through sobs.
“Oh-oh..no. Laura, no, please.” He said softly as he hurriedly took a seat in the chair next to me and took both of my hands. “Listen, I give you my concrete word, I will do everything and anything I can to protect you and get to end this. I am so, so...sorry it’s come to this..I’m so sorry I failed you-” I said nothing and just doubled over, proceeding to cry heavily into his hands.
He made hushing sounds as he stroked my ashy hair with the back of his hand.
“It’ll be alright, you stay here and I’ll fix everything. I’ll come up with a plan, okay? You’re completely protected here, consider 221B Fort Knox 2.0, yes?” He spoke soothingly, his deep voice and gentle hands were really helping at this point.
“Promise me I’ll be safe here? Please don’t let him hurt me.” I whimpered, I must’ve sounded pathetic. But for once I will wholeheartedly admit that I was scared for myself, I felt hopeless and alone.
Sherlock seemed to have a drug-like effect on me, at first I felt like I should steer clear but something repeatedly magnetised me back to him... and when I was with him I did feel safe. He may have ‘failed’ me but It’s not like I had many other options as it was... Who else was there for me now? I was just supremely thankful he was doing whatever he was doing at this moment in time that managed to soothe me a little.
“I wouldn’t dream of letting anything happen to you, Laura. I know..I’m not the easiest person to deal with at times, and I don’t think the same way as others may.. But I can promise you, you’re safe now. You’ll be absolutely fine- so long as you trust me. Can you promise me that?”
I nodded slowly, feeling my eyes drooping. “I promise” I mumbled, unsure if I fully believed myself. I was absolutely exhausted to the point of hysteria. I wanted nothing more than a few pills and a long, long sleep.
“Come on, let’s get you upstairs to rest. It’s all going to be fine, I’m with you.” He reassured me once again as he wrapped his arm around my waist and slowly helped me up. We made it up to the bedroom and I perched on the end of the bed as Sherlock paced around looking for ‘fresh clothes’ for me to change into. “I’m guessing I’m not going to get my wooly jumper back then?” Sherlock attempted to joke lightheartedly. I glanced at him, lacking the energy to muster even a smile at this point. “No? Too soon? Sorry...Here..” He handed me a long, flannel shirt and gave me a hand getting out of my work uniform, which coincidentally stank of smoke. Gently, he pulled the shirt over my head, folded my uniform and helped me under the duvet. He then proceeded to strip down to his boxers, put on some pyjama bottoms and smoothly slide into bed next to me. From that moment on I wanted to think of nothing but how comfortable I was. I wanted to temporarily forget the complete shit storm that had rained over me. Oh the bed was so warm and soft, the delicate cotton sheets felt magnificent against my bare legs, and Sherlock had sworn an oath to keep me safe. I had to trust him now, I had no choice. Whether I liked it or not.
For the first time in a long time I was completely out of my depth and had lost all control. So naturally, I gravitated to the nearest available source of comfort...again. I rested my head on his bare chest; noticing him quickly glance down at me unsure of how to react. He eventually wrapped his arm around me protectively and started tenderly tracing lines down my chest...And that was the exact point in which I noticed the track marks and purple bruises all the way down his forearm.
“Oh Laura, what an awful mess...You look terribly peaky; do let me know if you’d like a sugary tea-”
“Mrs. Hudson, I’ll take it from here. Thank you.” Sherlock said sombrely as he haltingly stalked into the kitchen.
“Alright, dear. Let me know if you need anything…” Mrs. Hudson said as she gave my hand a last comforting squeeze and stood up to leave the kitchen. Sherlock crouched down so he was looking at me eye-to-eye.
“A fire?” He threw it straight out. I nodded slowly, flashbacks still looping through my mind, I knew not to even question how he already managed to know. “There’s soot in your hair and you smell like you’ve just come out of a smokehouse, also the remnants of gasoline on your hands...What happened, Laura?” I managed to force a half-hearted smile at his insistence to show off at the worst given time possible.
“I needed space so I went to stay with a...colleague. Th-the stalker somehow planted a bomb inside her flat and threatened to detonate it if I didn’t leave. So of course I left as quickly as I could. She’s fine as far as I know... he just wanted me out of there. I went back to my place and...it was all just burned to ashes. Everything I own has been destroyed.” I blurted out, my voice shaking.
“Oh…” Sherlock said calmly. Why wan’t he responding?! Did this not constitute as something important to him at all? I needed a response, I needed comfort; I’d lost everything and my sanity was escaping me almost as rapidly as my home burned down. I unexpectedly gave up and burst into a flood of tears.
“I’m fucking terrified, Sherlock! I’m alone, homeless, most likely jobless. I have absolutely nothing!” I managed to choke out through sobs.
“Oh-oh..no. Laura, no, please.” He said softly as he hurriedly took a seat in the chair next to me and took both of my hands. “Listen, I give you my concrete word, I will do everything and anything I can to protect you and get to end this. I am so, so...sorry it’s come to this..I’m so sorry I failed you-” I said nothing and just doubled over, proceeding to cry heavily into his hands.
He made hushing sounds as he stroked my ashy hair with the back of his hand.
“It’ll be alright, you stay here and I’ll fix everything. I’ll come up with a plan, okay? You’re completely protected here, consider 221B Fort Knox 2.0, yes?” He spoke soothingly, his deep voice and gentle hands were really helping at this point.
“Promise me I’ll be safe here? Please don’t let him hurt me.” I whimpered, I must’ve sounded pathetic. But for once I will wholeheartedly admit that I was scared for myself, I felt hopeless and alone.
Sherlock seemed to have a drug-like effect on me, at first I felt like I should steer clear but something repeatedly magnetised me back to him... and when I was with him I did feel safe. He may have ‘failed’ me but It’s not like I had many other options as it was... Who else was there for me now? I was just supremely thankful he was doing whatever he was doing at this moment in time that managed to soothe me a little.
“I wouldn’t dream of letting anything happen to you, Laura. I know..I’m not the easiest person to deal with at times, and I don’t think the same way as others may.. But I can promise you, you’re safe now. You’ll be absolutely fine- so long as you trust me. Can you promise me that?”
I nodded slowly, feeling my eyes drooping. “I promise” I mumbled, unsure if I fully believed myself. I was absolutely exhausted to the point of hysteria. I wanted nothing more than a few pills and a long, long sleep.
“Come on, let’s get you upstairs to rest. It’s all going to be fine, I’m with you.” He reassured me once again as he wrapped his arm around my waist and slowly helped me up. We made it up to the bedroom and I perched on the end of the bed as Sherlock paced around looking for ‘fresh clothes’ for me to change into. “I’m guessing I’m not going to get my wooly jumper back then?” Sherlock attempted to joke lightheartedly. I glanced at him, lacking the energy to muster even a smile at this point. “No? Too soon? Sorry...Here..” He handed me a long, flannel shirt and gave me a hand getting out of my work uniform, which coincidentally stank of smoke. Gently, he pulled the shirt over my head, folded my uniform and helped me under the duvet. He then proceeded to strip down to his boxers, put on some pyjama bottoms and smoothly slide into bed next to me. From that moment on I wanted to think of nothing but how comfortable I was. I wanted to temporarily forget the complete shit storm that had rained over me. Oh the bed was so warm and soft, the delicate cotton sheets felt magnificent against my bare legs, and Sherlock had sworn an oath to keep me safe. I had to trust him now, I had no choice. Whether I liked it or not.
For the first time in a long time I was completely out of my depth and had lost all control. So naturally, I gravitated to the nearest available source of comfort...again. I rested my head on his bare chest; noticing him quickly glance down at me unsure of how to react. He eventually wrapped his arm around me protectively and started tenderly tracing lines down my chest...And that was the exact point in which I noticed the track marks and purple bruises all the way down his forearm.
♠ ♠ ♠
wut now?!!