Ark in the Storm

"Mina? Mina!"

I bolted upright in bed, my cries echoing throughout the hotel room. I breathed heavily and felt sweat rolling down my face and back.

A nightmare. That's all it was. You've been drinking too much again, Zero.

Moonlight slipped into the room through the thin white curtains, illuminating my sweaty torso.

Though the light had crept into the room, the clock itself was hidden in the shadows on the bedside table; its glowing green numbers informed me that it was just past four in the morning.

Every night since I had left home, I woke up like this at around the same time. I woke up like this after dreaming of her. Mina...I wondered how she was doing. My stomach knotted up as I remembered the nightmares I had been having of her.

Was she alright? Was she eating properly? Was she sleeping? Was she taking her medicine?

I should have contacted her by that time, but I never did. I had no excuse; it's just something I never could bring myself to do at that time. Everything was depressing.

Why do I always try to run away from my problems and emotions? I'm tired.

I laid there in bed for what seemed like a long time but, in reality, it was only about two minutes.

Having more than enough of my lazy thoughts, I immediately headed to the bathroom and showered before gathering my things and checking out of the hotel with nothing but her smile on my mind. I had to see her.

***

I returned home around nine a.m. and found that my roommate, Tsukasa, was nowhere to be found.

I tossed my bags into my room before changing my clothes and tugging a black ball cap over my chestnut waves.

Temporarily pushing Tsukasa out of my mind, I left the small house and set out to do what I had originally planned to do - to see Mina. I wouldn't run away any longer.

***

"Z-zero?" I heard her bell-like voice tremble with surprise as soon as she stepped outside, shutting the door behind her.

"I'm back," I grinned sheepishly. "Were you going out?"

"Yeah." She responded, fumbling with the buttons on her coat. "I was meeting Tsukasa for breakfast. Wanna come? I haven't seen you in a while."

She was going out for breakfast…with Tsukasa? I felt a twang in my heart. I was the one who used to take her out like this. My heart was full of questions, but I maintained my composure and gave her my answer.

“Of course. I haven’t seen Tsukasa in a while, either.”

With that, the two of us headed down to our usual breakfast café. The bell jingled as we opened the door and I was immediately able to spot Tsukasa sitting at a table fiddling with his iPhone.

“Tsukasa!” Mina cheered as we drew closer. “Look who I found!”

Tsukasa looked up from his phone and cracked a wide smile at me.

“I was wondering when you’d come home!” Tsukasa cried, hugging me with one arm. “You doing okay?”

“I’m alright,” I answered. “But I’m starved. Let’s get some food!”

Our good cheer lasted throughout our meal, but I couldn’t help but wonder if there was something between Tsukasa and Mina. He wouldn’t do that to me, would he? Should I ask?

“So, did anything special happen when I was gone?” I casually asked.

“Like what?” Tsukasa replied through his mouthful of food.

“I don’t know,” I responded. “New car? Uh, new job? New relationship?”

To my horror and relief, that was when Tsukasa understood. He swallowed his food and laughed light-heartedly.

“No, Zero. Nothing of the sort.” Tsukasa had the habit of rubbing his nose when he lied. He didn’t rub his nose at all during the entire conversation, so I knew he was telling the truth.

I thanked my lucky stars as the waitress came by with the check. Tsukasa insisted on paying and did so before we could say anything. He then dashed off to work, declaring that he’d be late if he didn’t run.

“He’s always rushing,” Mina tsked. “Kind of like how you used to be.”

I nodded in agreement, but said nothing. I knew what she meant, and I didn’t really want to broach the subject of how I used to be before D’espairsRay disbanded. I was happy in The Micro Head 4’ns, but D’espairsRay still held a firm place in my heart. I knew Tsukasa felt this way, too, but I also knew that he was pushing himself to improve in any way possible for The Micro Head 4n’s. He worked so hard and I admired him for that.

I decided to change the subject. “So are you still saving up to travel Europe?”

She nodded her head. “I’m not very close yet, but it will happen someday. I’ll make sure of it!” Determination shone through her warm almond eyes.

“You’ll send me postcards, right?” I asked, smiling.

“Definitely!”

At that moment, I realized something that I must had subconsciously done moments before. I was holding Mina’s hand. My cheeks felt warm despite the cold and I looked over at Mina to see a smile upon her face.

Just as I cracked a smile in return, her foot slipped off of the sidewalk as a car sped through the snowy street.

“Mina!” I grabbed her around her waist and quickly slung her around in front of me. She was so close to me. I could feel the warmth radiating from her body.

“Are you okay?” I queried, suddenly realizing how close our faces where.

“Yeah.” She murmured. “Thanks, Michiya.”I knew she was seriously thankful when she addressed me by my real name. She kissed my cheek and I felt her hand on top of mine. It felt like fire, even though it was snowing outside. I took her other hand, moving her to my side away from the street so she wouldn’t fall again.

“Zero?” she asked, once we reached her house.

“Hmm?”

“I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow. Would you mind going with me?” she quietly requested. I knew that she didn’t like doing these things alone, so I agreed. She smiled and kissed my cheek once more before disappearing into her house.

*****

I watched my white foggy breath flow through the air as she stepped out of her house. We walked to her doctor’s office, laughing and chatting the entire way. Seeing her really smile and hearing her laugh for the first time in so long made my heart beat and a smile spread across my own face.

Her eyes danced with life as did the sound of her wind-chime laughter. Even in spite of the mystery illness that haunted her, Mina positively glowed. My palms were sweating upon the beauty of the sight of her dark hair shining in the faint morning light.

Once she had returned to the waiting room after talking with the doctor, however, her smile seemed to had almost disappeared.

"Are you alright?" I asked as she sat next to me.

"I don't know," she answered honestly. "Will you go with me when the doctor comes back?"

"Of course," I answered with my usual response to her requests. As if I'd turn her down for anything. I silently scoffed at such a thought.

"Thank you," she murmured, resting her head on my shoulder and causing my heart to skip a beat. I wrapped my arm around her in hopes of easing her distress.

We waited in silence for the doctor's return. When he finally called Mina's name from the doorway, he led us down the hall and into an office with bare white walls. Every piece of furniture in the office matched the walls, save for the black computer chair and the two chairs that Mina and I were seated in.

"Miss Sato," the doctor began once we had sat down.

I sat up straight, waiting for him to say what he was going to say. Was Mina alright? Did they finally figure out how to help her?

The doctor wiped his glasses with his white coat before he spoke again.
"I'm afraid that we do not know what could be causing your symptoms."

I froze. They really didn't know what was wrong with her?!

The doctor continued with, "We know of some illnesses that share symptoms close to the ones you are experiencing, however, you seem to have no such illnesses. We will continue to conduct further tests as well as extensive research. For now, I'll give a prescription for a few medications that might help ease the symptoms."

He paused and nobody spoke.

"Miss Sato, I want you to listen to me very carefully," the doctor started again.

Bad news. I knew it had to be bad. I could feel it in my bones. I could feel it in my heart. I was fearful.

"Miss Sato, the odds are not good for you. At this rate, I'm sorry to say that there is a mighty high chance of you dying sometime in the next few years."

Leaving Mina and myself speechless, he tore the paper with Mina's prescription from his clipboard and handed it to her in silence.

With that, we silently filed out of the office and down the sidewalk. I was certain that all of the color in my face had drained away. I must have been pale. So deathly pale; just like her.

Neither of us spoke, but we both understood our lack of words. We were scared. So scared. I clenched my fist until my knuckles turned white before crying out and letting my fist fly into a tree in the park we were passing by.

"Michiya?!" Mina cried out, taking my fist into her cold hands as water droplets escaped my brown eyes.

Her eyes met mine and I knew that all that time I had wasted running away from my feelings would someday be the biggest regret of my life.

"Mina," I choked. My emotions were eating me alive. I had to set them free. I couldn't handle it much longer.

Without thinking, I pulled her close to me and wrapped my arms around her in what seemed to be a vain and pathetic attempt to protect her from the illness that was draining the life out of her. I heard her quietly murmur my name and could feel that she herself was on the verge of tears. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Mina, I have something I need to tell you."

I looked her in her eyes. Her beautiful almond eyes. This was happening quickly. I would no longer run away from my emotions. I couldn't bring myself to at that time.

"Mina, I love you."

I was nervous as I spoke the words out loud, but it felt right. I had kept my feelings hidden for years. Without even waiting for her to reply, I kissed her, brushing my thumb across her cheek and tucking her snow-filled hair behind her ears.

It was what she murmured to me against my lips that made me feel so warm even on such a cold, heart-wrenching day.

"I love you, too."

We spent the rest of the day together. Mina had made delicious hot chocolate that we sipped on while we watched a movie in her room. I glanced at her from time to time throughout the movie and studied her lips as she sipped her hot chocolate. I wanted to kiss her again.

The movie ended just as snowy winds began to whirl around outside.

“Looks like a snowstorm,” Mina commented, taking my cup. She took the cups into the kitchen and came back wiping her wet hands on her jeans. “Why don’t you stay here tonight?”

“Thanks,” I smiled, standing up. She gazed into my eyes and grew quiet. I blinked at her, unsure of what to do next. I settled for cupping her cheek and twiddling the loose strands of her soft hair.

She smiled and I suddenly felt my lips upon hers. We kissed slowly with gentleness until Mina wrapped her arms around my neck. I caressed her face with my hand as I pushed strands of her dark hair behind her ear while our kisses deepened. We were both growing hungrier for each other with each and every kiss. These feelings had been bottled up and kept hidden away for too long.

I was feeling dizzy with passion when I felt our weight shift and our bodies fall onto the bed. It seemed almost surreal. Everything was happening so quickly. Without missing a beat, passion and human desire enveloped us that night.