Him

I am going to be late. I check my clock again, and the ticking hands show that it is 6:55. So, if the train runs perfectly on schedule, I can take a three minute smoke break right after I get out of Oglesby. I take a long deep breath, and grab my knees until I can’t feel my hands shake anymore. I should really quit smoking. All this anxiety about having enough time to get my nicotine fix is stressful. Maybe I’ll get some of that nicotine gum after work. I lean farther back in the old train seats. I just need to smoke.

To ease my thoughts, I look out the window. We’re almost in the heart of the city. So, I look back down at my watch. We’re running early. That’s good. That’s very good, because I don’t know how much longer my body can go without a cigarette.

I close my eyes to try and relax. It will be another long day at work. I have to file Mrs. Garcia’s case in Ellen’s files. Then I probably have to translate more, which I don’t mind. Spanish has always felt more normal than English.

My head jerks forward, and my eyes force themselves open. We’ve stopped and they’re about to open the doors. I grab my purse, and push past all the men and women around me so I can be first through the door. Although, it’s easier said than done. These commuters are used to being shoved around, and they are also very used to standing their ground especially in these situations. I wish I was taller and stronger, and then this would be easier. But, I’m 5’4. I’m normal.

I push past one last lady who’s preoccupied with her phone, and seize my opportunity. I’m at the front just as the doors open and just like that I’m sprinting off the train into the masses of converging people. I slip in and out of holes, and push the door leading me to my solace.

Right away I drift over to the corner and light up. The smoke fills my lungs, and the anxiety completely vanishes. My mind is clear, and the warmth of the smoke spreads throughout my body. I look back down at my watch, and I find that I have twenty minutes to get to work. Plenty of time.
I take another drag, and feel a tap on my shoulder.

“Could I have a cigarette?” I turn around and almost drop my cigarette. A man is staring back at me. What did he just ask me?

“What?”

“Can I have one?” He gestures to the thing in my hand. Oh! He wants a cigarette. I take the pack out of my purse and open it.

“Thanks” He takes his lighter out, and inhales and exhales. I’m staring at him. I quickly divert my gaze to the excessive amount of salt on the sidewalks.

I take another quick glance at him. He’s looking straight at me. I divert my gaze again. Wow, they really put a lot of salt on the sidewalks.

“What’s your name?” I look at him. However, this time I don’t look away. He’s handsome. His eyes look kind and invite me to respond, so I do.

“Lena, you?” He smiles.

“Warren” I still hold his gaze, and I think I forgot to breathe because my chest feels all tight. I look away and take a breath. Yeah, definitely forgot to breathe. I look back down at my watch. Shit, I have ten minutes to get to work.

I shove the pack in my purse, and quickly take another drag. Then I step on it. I take one last look at Warren before I start heading in the direction of work.

“Hey wait up!” I hear a voice behind me, but I don’t stop. Someone’s talking to someone else. Not me.

“Lena!” I whip my head around to see Warren running towards me. He catches up to me in a few seconds, and all I do is stare.

“Where are you going?”

“Work.” I spin on my heel and start heading towards work again.

“Can I walk you there?” I look to my side to see that he’s right there. I don’t respond. I’m going to be late. I quicken my pace so I can get rid of him, but his strides are long and efficient.

“Where do you work?” I don’t respond again. I try and lengthen my strides, but it’s kind of hard to do in heels.

“Okay, so you don’t want to tell me where you work. That’s fine. I guess I’ll figure out anyways. So is Lena your full name? I've never met a Lena before.”

“No, it’s not my full name. Don’t you have somewhere to be?” I realized that I just stopped walking, and look at my watch again. Five minutes. Shit. I continue my trek, and I still sense that he is right beside me. What the hell does he want from me?

“Actually I don’t have anywhere to be for another few hours.” I see the sign sticking out of the building where I work. I get to the door, and turn around.

“You can leave now, I’m at work.” He just smiles revealing white and dazzling teeth. He looks up at the sign that lingers above him, and smirks.

“So you’re a lawyer? That’s why you’re so stern.”

“No, I’m not a lawyer. I’m a translator.”

“Well you learn something new every day.” Why isn't he leaving? He walked me to work for some odd reason, and now he’s not leaving.

“You can leave now.” I say a little harsher than the first time.

“No, I’m good. I kind of like the vibe around here. What time do you get off of work Lena?” He takes two steps closer to me. I take a step back and run into the door.

“Why do you want to know?” He takes another few steps forward, and now he’s inches away from me. I can feel the heat radiating off him, and I can smell the cigarette he’d been smoking earlier.

“I don’t know. Do you want to get dinner with me?” His face was getting closer to mine, and I realized how tall he actually was. He must be at least 6’2. My heart was starting to race. Why does he want to have dinner with me? I’m not pretty.

“I get off work at 6.” Then, his lips were on mine. It wasn't hard and forceful like the way other men used to kiss me. His lips barely touched mine.

“I’ll see you at 6 Lena!” He smiled and waved. He was gone. My mouth is still open from shock, and I pinch myself to make sure I’m not dreaming. Ow, I’m not dreaming. If I’m not dreaming, then what the hell just happened?