All My Heart

“Dr. Reid,” he greets tiredly. “Hello?”
“I’m sorry for calling so late,” I apologize immediately.
“No, it’s fine. What’s the matter, Juliet?”
“I…I just…Can you come over?”
He gets a quiet for a moment, and I hear sheets shifting. “It’s three in the morning.”
“Spencer, I-I can’t sleep. I can’t close my eyes. I can’t sit in my house in the quiet for Christ’s sake. I just need some company, and I know it’s late. I’m so sorry for that, but I can’t do this by myself.”
“I’ll be over as soon as I can.”
It takes him less than twenty minutes to get here, and he’s still in his pajamas when he shows up. He looks as exhausted as I do. “Thank you, Spence, and I’m so sorry that—“
“I’m glad you called me. I wish it was at a better hour, but I’d rather you called me,” he cuts me off.
My lips pull into a small smile, and I embrace him tightly. “Thank you.”

Morning rolls around, and my apartment smells like coffee. The side of my bed that Reid fell asleep on is empty, so I head towards my kitchen where I find Reid drinking a cup of coffee and reading a book. He looks at me once I walk in. “I hope you don’t mind…” He gestures to the coffee and book.
I smile and shake my head. I pour myself a cup of coffee and sit across from him at the small table.
“You talk in your sleep,” he informs me.
“I know. I really only do it when I have nightmares,” I reply.
“So I experienced.”
I laugh a little and smile sheepishly. “I’m sorry if I woke you or kept you up.”
“I’ve been where you are, Juliet, and I know how hard it gets. I’d rather lose a few hours of sleep than watch you lose yourself in substance abuse.”
I frown at how he talks about it. He doesn’t talk about it at all with most people, but he holds so much self-hatred for himself for it. He’d never admit it to anyone except for even less people than he’d admit he was addicted to.
I rest my hand on his. “Thank you, Spencer. You don’t know how much I appreciate this.”
“Juliet, I told you before. I like you, and I would do this all over again if you asked me to. I had this chance once, and I messed it up. I’m not going to take it for granted again.” I nod and smile at him. “You’re a great agent, and I would hate to see such talent go to waste.”
I don’t really have a response to him. I just keep the smile until I lift the cup of coffee to my lips. “I saw a therapist after what happened with Luke, and after every session, my therapist would remind me that things can only get better. I didn’t believe him for the longest time, and sometimes I still have trouble with the idea. It’s something that just nags at you constantly—I’m sure you understand.” Reid nods. “But you make me feel again. I know that we wanted to try this to see if we felt better, and I do. But, I don’t want this to end here.”
He smiles at me. “Me either. I was hoping that’s what you’d take out of me telling you how I felt.”
“Honestly, it wasn’t when you first told me. I think it started to sink in when I almost blew myself up.” We share a small laugh. “Either way, I know now.”
“So, where do we go from here?”
“Are you ready to give another relationship a try?” Reid takes a deep breath and nods slowly with an exhale.
“Yeah, I want to. Are you?”
I smile and nod. “Yeah, I am.”

“There’s something different about them, I swear,” Garcia whispers to Derek as I walk back into the bullpen after lunch. She immediately quits her conversation. I raise an eyebrow at her, and she smiles before booking it out of the bullpen.
“Afternoon, Juliet,” Alex chimes as she finally comes in for work.
“Alex, hey!” I greet. “Just the girl I was hoping to see.”
“I’ve been meaning to check in with you, but this mess of incoming cases…” She sighs and pulls out a large pile of files.
“I’m okay, yeah. Reid’s been a really big help.”
Alex smiles. “That’s great to hear. The two of you really hit it off, huh?” I nod just as he comes into the bullpen with two cups of Starbucks and his leather bag slung over his shoulder. His hair is in a slight mess from the excessive wind today, and one of the collars of his coat is unfolded and sticking straight up.
“Your coffee,” he greets, setting down the Venti hazelnut on my desk.
“Thank you. Did you have a chance to read over those notes from the Hunter case?” I question, pulling out the file to two possible murders in Mississippi, dating back to the 80’s.
“Yeah, I didn’t think they were related. The handwritings are similar, but you can see the hesitation marks on the second note. It looks like a copycat.”
“Awesome, that’s what I saw, too.”
We all spend the day helping each other with our cases and paperwork. At the end of the work day, other than Hotch, Reid and I are the last ones out. “What are your plans tonight?” I ask him.
“There’s a Korean movie marathon at the park. Wanna come?” I look at him for a moment. “I can translate for you.” His pinky and ring finger hook through mine as we approach his car.
I smile a little bit. “Yeah, alright.” He smiles widely.
“Perfect! There’s this movie that they’re playing tonight that’s one of my favorites,” he begins. The whole ride over to the outdoor theatre, he tells me all about the movies enthusiastically.
“Spence, aren’t you thirsty?” I laugh. “You talked the whole ride over here.”
He shrugs. “Not really. A human can go three days without drinking anything before it kills them.”
I laugh again. “I know that.”
He smiles. “I know.” We head into the small snack bar and get some popcorn and drinks.
The first movie starts, and Reid’s been flawlessly translating for me. “I have a question,” I cut him off. He stops talking and looks at me funny. “I’m sorry, I know you love this movie, but it’s a burning question.”
“Okay…”
“How come you didn’t try to kiss me yesterday?”
The question visibly puts him off. “I-I don’t necessarily consider the physical aspects as important in a relationship than something like communication or understanding—“
“You talk very formally when you’re uncomfortable. Did you know that?”
“Are you profiling me?”
“It’s just an observation.” I shrug and continue to look at him while he directs his attention to his hands. “Have you ever had a physical relationship with someone?”
He shrugs. “I guess I’ve never truly had a relationship with someone…I was dating her, but we’d never met. And Lilah wasn’t anything.”
“Have you ever kissed someone?”
“Yes!” he groans. “Are we done with the interrogation now?” He looks back at me.
I take that as my opportunity to lean across the car until our lips are brushing. I feel Reid tense up briefly, but then he closes the space between our lips. His hand grasps the side of my neck, and I cup his cheeks. Feeling his lips on mine makes my heart race.
I lift up the armrest up and climb into his lap. My back lays on the horn accidentally, and I jump away from his lips in shock. I laugh afterwards while he slides the seat back as far as he can. I press my lips back to his. His hands grasp my waist, untucking my shirt to run his hands over my bare sides. I run my hands up his chest to the knot in his tie. I pull it loose and undo the top three buttons of his shirt.
Reid pulls away and rests his forehead on mine, his chest rising and falling against mine with a deep breath. “What’s the matter?” I mumble onto his lips.
“Nothing,” he assures, shifting a little underneath me. My eyebrows raise a little in entertainment. “Don’t look at me like that.” He places a few kisses on my neck.
“Don’t think I can’t feel that.” I press my lips back to his shortly.
“I-I’m sorry.”
“Spence,” I giggle.
“What?”
“You’re a grown man. I am a grown woman.” He lets out a small laugh. I start undoing the buttons on my shirt.
“What are you doing?”
“Just trust me, babe. If this isn’t what you want, we can stop right now.” He doesn’t say anything, so I leave my shirt on but open, exposing my simple, black bra. I can tell Reid is trying not to stare. I lean in and kiss him again. His hands immediately grasp my sides again. I roll my hips slowly over his, and he lets out a low groan.

“You’re hysterical,” I laugh, leaning into Reid’s side as we walk into Walgreens. Our fingers are interlocked, and he places a kiss to the side of my head.
“Forgive me. I’m not as experienced as most.”
“Just follow me.” I pull him down the closest aisle. “Alright,” I sigh, examining my options carefully.
“What’s the difference?” He looks rapidly over the selections. “What on earth is fire and ice?”
“Just don’t,” I advise. “At least not with me. It’s like putting Icy Hot—“
“Okay, I get it.” I laugh and look up at him. “What?”
“Are you really that uncomfortable right now?”
He shrugs. “I’ve never really spent much time down this aisle.” I pull a Trojan box off of the hook and head towards the register.
“Alright. Let’s go home.”