Do It Now, Remember It Later.

I bit my lip, sitting in my sixth hour and thinking about my day. It’s actually been okay so far. I talked to Rian, ran into Gaskarth, and became acquaintances with Kellin. Well, I sat with him at lunch anyway. He found me and wanted to warn me about Gaskarth again. I really don’t know what he’s talking about, I mean…aren’t gangs only in movies? I’ve never seen anything like that in real life. Then again, I used to live in a very safe neighborhood where you didn’t even have to lock your doors at night. It’s pretty different here, but I live in a gated community so it’s not like anything bad can really happen.

“Remember to read the rest of chapter six for homework tonight!” Mrs. Rogers exclaimed as the bell rang.

I slid my book into my bag with a sigh, watching everyone practically tackle each other to get out of the door. Once I was one of the few students left, I pulled my bag over my shoulder and slowly trudged out into the semi-crowded hall. I made my way to the doors I came in earlier today. When I was close enough to push it open, I stopped. I could feel the cold air coming through the cracks of the door and I’d rather not be standing outside for another fifteen minutes until my mom gets here.

“Jack!”

I jumped at the sudden call of my name, turning around to see Rian walking over to me with his bright smile. He looked the same as earlier except now he had a hoodie on.

“Hey.” I smiled, nodding at him as he got closer.

Once he stopped in front of me, he grin widened and he glanced around the halls. He looked so nice and innocent, how could I think of him as a gang member as Kellin called him. Maybe he was just messing with me, but him and his friends did seem pretty serious…

“You haven’t seen a douchebag looking guy around recently, have you? All black, head buzzed on each side, probably looked like he wanted to punch something?” He questioned.

I bit my lip, racking my brain to see if I saw anyone that fit the description.

“Is that how you fucking describe your friends you fucking dick?”

I jumped, turning to the voice the seemed to come from just a few feet away. My eyes met a semi-familiar brown pair and I bit my lip harder when I realized it was the guy I ran into earlier. I almost didn’t realize it was the same guy with his black snapback over his head along with the black hood of his black hoodie. He also wore a worn looking, faded black denim jacket.

“Just you.” Rian shot back playfully.

I looked away, awkwardly glancing out the glass door. Now he found his friend so there’s no need to talk to me anymore and I didn’t want them to think I was trying to listen to their conversations or anything.

“Looks like I found him, but thanks Jack.”

I looked back over to Rian’s blinding grin before glancing back at the other guy. Gaskarth, was it?

“No problem…” I trailed off shyly.

“You’re the kid that ran into me today.”

I glanced back at Gaskarth, trying to fight the blush from showing up on my cheeks. Instead, I gnawed on the inside of my cheek and nodded my head slowly.

“Sorry about that…” I mumbled.

“You mean you probably ran into him, asshole.” Rian concluded.

I felt my eyes grow wide as I shook my head, not wanting to start anything with anyone.

“No, it was me.” I replied nervously, wringing my hands together.

“No, it was him.” Rian chuckled. “He never pays attention and shoves anything out of his way. Don’t worry about it, Jack. He’s an asshole.”

“I’m right here, y’know.”

I smiled a little at the playful banter before remembering what Kellin warned me about.

They may seem okay at first, but you shouldn’t trust them. Don’t even get to know them. Not a single one. You’ll only end up hurt. Trust me.

“Whatever, Al.” Rian scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Don’t be a dick to my new friend Jack.”

I bit my lip, eyes widening at the label. Friends? I made a friend? Oh my god, I must be dreaming because nobody has ever talked to me nor wanted to be friends with me.

“I’m not sure you need any more friends, Ri.” Al stated.

Rian’s grin faltered a bit before he rolled his eyes and turned back to me.

“Ignore him, I’d like to think of us as friends from now on, okay?” He asked hopefully.

I raised an eyebrow, still wondering why he wanted to be my friend. It was so new and exciting, I just couldn’t turn him down.

“Deinitely.” I smiled.

“We have to go.” Al ordered, storming past me and grabbing Rian by the hood. “We’re running late.”

Before I could opened my mouth again, Al was pushing the door next to the one I was standing in front of open and pulling Rian’s body out with his.

“See ya!” Rian called before the door slammed shut.

I nodded, replaying the events through my mind. I just made a friend. Or a few friends if I count Kellin? Maybe I really did change. I got a fresh start and it’s already turning out completely different from my old life. Something seemed sketchy about Rian and Al though…maybe Kellin was right. No matter how unsure about Rian and his friend I felt, I don’t think I can really stay away. They’re mysterious, that’s for sure. Especially Al, and I couldn’t help but want to get to know him.
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“How was your first day?” Dad asked as he scooped a forkful of mashed potatoes into his mouth.

“It went pretty well for only being there a couple hours.” I shrugged, taking a bite of my own food. “I made two friends. Kind of.”

“That’s great, Jack!” Mom exclaimed, wiping her mouth with her napkin.

“Yeah.” I agreed, taking a sip of my pop.

“I told you moving would be good for all of us.” Dad chirped.

I smiled, nodding in agreement because maybe he was right afterall. And maybe my mom was right about me changing. If I was still back in Michigan, I would’ve never had the guts to talk to Rian or Kellin and I definitely wouldn’t have even been able to reply to someone as hot as Al. Al or Gaskarth, whatever his name is. He’s so fucking hot I can’t get his image out of my head no matter how hard I try not to think about him. Everything about him just screams asshole, but I just can’t help but want to know him.

“Maybe you’ll find someone like Devin.” Mom commented.

I stopped my fork mid-way to my mouth and looked over at her in shock. Someone like Devin? He is the reason that I became a target in the first place. Yeah, I wasn’t always friendless, I used to be best friends with a boy named Devin Jacobs. We did everything together. He was my best friend from first grade to eighth. I could trust him, he could trust me, and we had each other’s backs in any situation. That’s what I thought anyway, until the awful second week of eight grade. I thought I could trust him when I was scared about my sexuality. I told him that I like boys and he really seemed unbothered by it. He was the first person I came out to and he told me he would love me no matter what. He told me nothing would change between us. I shouldn’t have believed him.

Our friendship was always so close and touchy-feely. We would always cuddle up together when we slept or watched movies and we would often hold hands when we walked. It was just one of our best friend things to do. I guess once you’re around thirteen, that’s weird for guys to do. At least, that’s what some popular kid named Derek told me one day when he saw us doing it. He accused us of being nasty fags. Devin’s dream was always to be popular, so it’s safe to say that he took the chance when he could. He totally turned against me, telling them how I was disgusting and how I always made him do things like hold my hand and stuff because I was in love with him or some other bullshit. I can even remember him punching me and shoving me into the lockers, cheering and thanking Derek for setting him free. I know he knew I didn’t feel that way towards him, but I didn’t want him to get treated badly just because of me and I wanted him to be happy so I just let everything happen. Everyday after that, he continued picking on me with everyone else. As we got older, the bullying got worse; I was shoved into lockers, thrown in dumpsters, and beaten up pretty badly sometimes. It was definitely a relief for my parents to be able to take me away from that.

“Or someone just the opposite of him, considering that kid was a little asshole that made Jack’s life hell all because he was born to like the same gender.” Dad told, stabbing a piece of meat onto his fork.

“Yes, that’s what I meant. I don’t know what went wrong with him.” Mom sighed.

“I’m already having a better life. That’s all that really matters right?” I smiled softly, shaking the hurtful memories to the back of my mind.

“Right.” Dad agreed.

I smiled softly, feeling accomplished. I made two friends on the first day. I don’t need to let the memories of Devin and his stupid friends ruin anything for me now. They’re back in Michigan while I’m here in Maryland. Now they’re just fading memories and I can’t wait to make new memories to replace all the shitty ones.

The table fell in silence, besides mom’s occasional question about dad’s new workplace so I ate the rest of my dinner quickly and thanked my mom for cooking before I headed to my room. All I really felt like doing was taking a shower and going to bed, so that’s exactly what I did.
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It turns out that Kellin is in my first, second, and third hour. Then I have Rian in Music, so it’s pretty cool that I know somebody in at least four of my six classes. Speaking of music, thankfully it’s time to go there. I’m sick of listening to stupid lectures about the most boring things like world scandals from the nineteen-sixties or about what a narrative essay is. I can use some free time to just relax and maybe play a little guitar or something.

“Jack?”

I stood up and slid my bag over my shoulder before looking to Kellin who was standing next to me. I raised an eyebrow in question and threw him a small smile. I’m really thankful to have Kellin wanting to talk to me, even if he does seem a bit pushy. Especially about the whole don’t talk to the gang thing, which I think is a little ridiculous because Rian seems like such a nice guy and there’s no way there are real gangs. I just can’t see Rian being involved with a group of people who-wait…what do people in gangs even do? Steal? Does that count as being racist? I guess that has nothing to do with race-

“Jack, are you listening?”

I bit my lip, locking my gaze with Kellin’s and smiling bashfully. I’ve got to stop getting so lost in my stupid thoughts.

“Sorry, what?” I asked.

“I asked if you were joining us at lunch again.” He repeated with a small smile, telling me he wasn’t annoyed that I hadn’t been paying attention.

“Oh, yeah. Of course.” I smiled, nodding my head.

I don’t think I would sit anywhere else anyways, but I’m glad he offered to let me sit with him and his friends again. I’d rather not spend lunch alone anymore. It gets depressing after a while.

“Okay, see you later then.” He grinned, waving a quick goodbye before leaving he room.

I smiled to myself, proud that I’ve got people talking to me after only being here for a two days. Part of me wants to shove it in Devin’s face because he was wrong. I’m not a waste of flesh. I’ve got two people who actually like me so far. He said that nobody would like me, so he’s wrong again. Gripping my bag tighter, I walked out of the empty class happily and practically skipped to the music room.

I bit my lip as I got closer, pulling the door open shyly and stepping in just as the bell rang.

“Welcome everyone! How is everyone today?” Mrs. Monroe greeted excitedly.

A few responses echoed across the room, seeming to make Mrs. Monroe’s smile get even bigger. She must be an extremely nice and happy person. Every time I’ve seen her she’s been smiling or laughing. I wonder if she ever gets angry.

“Glad to hear everyone’s doing good. Today’s just going to be a free day, so go ahead and sit around if you want. Talk, take a nap, do other homework. Whatever you want, except no inappropriate touching!” She chirped, skipping back to her desk and plopping down into her chair.

I blushed when she mentioned the inappropriate touching thing and looked around for a free spot in the room. When I spotted a free corner, I made my way over and plopped down. I pulled my notebook out of my bag, along with a pen before I pulled my knees up to my chest. Maybe I should use now to start my stupid narrative essay.

I bit the tip of my pen, staring intently at the blank paper as I thought about what I could right about. The assignment was to write about one of the most memorable life-changing events that happened in our life so far. I was in the middle of scribbling my name at the top right corner while I listened to the voices of the people around me talking to each other. I kept my eyes glued to the tip of my black pen, until I heard a commotion coming from the other side of the room.

“I told you to fucking take it easy! Stop trying so hard to act like it’s not a big deal because it is.”

I looked up, biting my lip when I saw Rian slowly dragging a limping body closer to my side of the room. Rian’s eyes flickered to mine and I felt my heart skip at the angry look on his face. I don’t really know Rian, but he didn’t seem like the guy to be scary when angry. Once his eyes met mine, his face changed into something much softer.

“Sit you ass down.” He mumbled, walking over to the only other non-crowded area in the room.

Next to me.

“Sit. I’ll be right back.” Rian muttered.

I bit my lip, looking back down at my paper while I listened to another body slid down the wall a few feet away from me. They hissed in pain and I instantly looked over to find myself staring at Al. His hair was covered with a black beanie and dark blue skinny jeans clung to his legs while the black hoodie he wore seemed to hang loosely off of his frame. He was leaning back against the wall with his legs straightened out in front of him while his arms were planted on the floor on both sides of him. His eyes were closed and he was biting his lip harshly, almost like he was in a lot of pain.

“The fuck you lookin’ at?”

I jumped out of my thoughts to see Al staring back at me with a cold glare.

“U-Uh…s-sorry I was uh-thinking…” I stuttered, nervously biting the tip of my pen again.

“Well fucking look somewhere else to think.” He snapped, slouching back against the wall and wincing.

“Sorry.” I whispered, feeling my face heat up in embarrassment.

I looked back to my blank paper and pretended to ponder what I was going to write. Instead, I was thinking about what happened to Al. Why was he in here? Why was Rian late? Why was Rian so angry and why does Al sitting so stiff and grimacing? So many questions were running through my head and I knew I should just push them out of my mind because none of it is my business, but I just couldn’t. I’m way too curious for my own good.

“You’re fucking staring at me again. Didn’t your mom ever tell you it’s rude to stare?”

I jumped out of my thoughts once again, realizing that I was indeed staring at Al again. I blushed, biting my lip and looking down at my lap.

“I’m so sorry.” I mumbled. “I didn’t realize I started daydreaming again…”

“Well you must be thinking about me if you keep staring at me.” He muttered. “I guess it’s okay, I mean I am sexy as fuck.”

I glanced back over at him, blushing harder when I saw him looking back at me with a crooked smirk. A sexy crooked smirk.

“Don’cha think?” He questioned, leaning forward a bit and cringing. “Fuck.”

I cursed myself as my blush darkened, immediately frowning when I saw a look of pain cross his features. Sucking in a deep breath, I thought back to this morning when I had a headache. My mom gave me a couple pills of Ibuprofen before my dad ushered me out to the car to get to school on time. He ended up stopping at Tim Horton’s and getting me a donut along with a hot chocolate. Needless to say, my headache disappeared without me swallowing the pills.

“U-Uh…” I started shakily, mustering up all the confidence I could find. “I have some…um…some Ibuprofen in my bag. T-Three of them, if you…want them?””

I squeezed my eyes shut, mentally slapping myself in the face for sounding so awkward and stupid. I bit my lip, holding in a breath for a few seconds as I was met with silence.

“Uh…yeah. Actually, do you mind?”

I opened my eyes, my mouth opening a little in shock when I met Al’s unsure face. I nodded slowly, reaching for my messenger bag and pulling the pills out. I bit my lip, leaning over and dropping them in his open hand.

“I uh..dont have anything to drink…” I trailed off quietly, biting my lip as I awaited his reaction.

“S’fine.” He mumbled, popping the pills into his mouth and swallowing them dry.

I plopped back down in my original position, biting my lip softly while Al sighed and laid his head back against the wall.

“Monroe’s cool with you coming in here for a few days.” Rian informed as he plopped down in front of Al.

He glanced at me and threw me a small smile. I sighed in relief that he wasn’t as angry as before and smiled back before putting my notebook back in my lap.

“I don’t need you to fucking babysit me.” Al grunted.

“Shut up and relax while you fucking can.” Rian retorted, crossing his legs together and pulling his phone out of his pocket.

Sighing quietly, I picked up my pen and went on writing some ideas for my essay down while Rian and Al stayed silent. I kept my gaze on what I was writing on the paper in front of me until the bell rang signaling the end of class. Thank God lunch is next because I’m starving. I closed my notebook and clipped my pen to it before shoving it into my bang and standing up. I zipped my blue zip-up all the way, since I was a little cold, and watched as all of the people rushed out of the room. Biting my lip, I decided to leave without saying anything to Rian since he seemed like he wasn’t in the mood to talk to me. I was about halfway to the door when a voice stopped me.

A voice that wasn’t Rian’s.

“Thanks for the pills, Jack. See you around.”

I turned around slowly, watching Al wave with a small smile before I nodded and continued walking out of the room.

Maybe Al isn’t such an asshole all the time after all.