Do It Now, Remember It Later.

“Dude, what happened to you yesterday? You never came back.”

I looked up from my notebook to find Kellin glancing down at me with a relieved expression.

“I thought something happened to you, man.” He sighed, plopping down in his seat.

“Sorry.” I mumbled sheepishly. “I had to leave early…”

“Oh yeah? How come?” He wondered curiously.

I bit my lip, shivering as the memory of Alex’s bleeding body flashed across my mind.

“My uh-mom called me out as I was walking back. Needed me home early so I didn’t have to walk home.” I lied, hoping to God I sounded believable.

I’m a terrible liar.

“Oh, okay. I’m just glad you’re okay.” He smiled.

I just hope Alex is okay.

“Yeah.” I smiled, watching him turn around before slouching in my seat.

The truth is, I had Alex’s blood on my clothes yesterday and I knew I had to get home and wash them before my mom could question me. The last thing I needed was to explain to my mother that I helped get a bleeding guy into a car so he could go to the hospital instead of calling an ambulance which is what we probably should’ve done. Anyways, I didn’t really want to explain to her how he got hurt because I don’t even know myself and I would probably end up spitting out that they are supposedly in a gang.

Yeah, that wouldn’t turn out well.

I rested my head on my hand while I leaned forward onto my desk. I just had a feeling I wouldn’t be able to focus much today. Alex is all I can think about and I just need to know if he’s alright. I don’t know why I feel such a strong need to know what happened to him, but I do.

“Open your books to page one hundred and thirty. We’ll begin the lesson there.”

I sighed, opening my book and staring blankly at the pages.
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“So I’m pretty sure you didn’t hear anything that was said during any of our classes so far…are you okay?”

I snapped out of my daydream, moving my gaze to Kellin’s worried face. That’s also when I realized we were the only two left in the classroom. Did the time go by fast or what? I mean, last thing I remember I was just sitting down.

“Uh…I’m fine.” I smiled, getting up from my seat. “Just tired.”

And worried. And confused. Why can’t I get Alex out of my head? I’ve barely even talked to the guy! He’s just…he’s really something.

“Okay, maybe you should nap in your next hour. Music right?” He asked, leading me out into the hallway.

“Yeah.” I nodded.

“You said you’ve been having free periods, so yeah. I’d take a nap if I were you so you can last the rest of the day.” He chuckled.

I laughed with him and smiled as I nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, maybe I will.” I sighed.

“See you at lunch.” He smiled before we walked down separate halls.

I nodded in agreement even though he couldn’t see me anymore. With a tired sigh, I made my way down the crowded halls until I found the door to the music room. I smiled, opening the door and stepping into the semi-crowded room. The first thing I noticed was the body taking up my spot in the room.

I frowned, furrowing my eyebrows until I realized who it was. Alex.

I bit my lip nervously, debating n whether I should go talk to him or even sit next to him. What if he doesn’t want to see me at all because I helped get him help he seemed to not want? What if he hates that I got involved? He already seemed to kinda dislike me-

“Don’t look so damn nervous, buttercup. I don’t bite. Well, unless you want me to.”

I jumped out of my trance, my eyes focusing and looking to where the voice came from. Alex leaned up against the wall across from me, a crooked smirk plastered onto his face as one of his eye brows raised. As soon as my brain processed what he said to me, my lip was once again pulled between my teeth in an attempt to keep myself focused on the pain in my lip instead of the blush fighting its way up my cheeks.

“Shut the fuck up, Alex.” Rian scoffed, coming into view as he plopped down next to him. “You can sit with us, Jack. I promise Alex won’t make any more comments towards you.”

“God, Ri. You fucking ruin all the fun.” Alex grunted, leaning his head back against the wall.

I bit my lip, slowly inching my way over to the empty space next to Alex. I slowly sat down and crossed my legs in front of me, getting comfortable so I was facing him and Rian.

“Jack…dayummmm lookin’ good today.” Alex giggled, biting his lip and sending a very uncoordinated wink my way.

I blushed, quickly looking away from him and down to my lap in attempt to hide my blush which only seemed to cause more giggles to fall from his lips. Oh my god, giggles? Alex is giggling right now and it’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.

“Wait…did you just call me hot?” I asked shyly, biting my lip to help keep the blush from spreading across my cheeks again.

“Mhmmmm.” He hummed, lifting his hand up to point at me…or something because he completely smacked his hand into the wall. “Owie.”

“Are you okay?” I wondered, watching his eyes cross as he frowned.

“I will be if you kiss me better.” He flirted shamelessly, his words sounding a little slurred.

I blushed, feeling my cheeks burning as he reached forward.

“Okay, that’s enough harassing Jack.” Rian jumped in, grabbing Alex’s hands and setting them into his lap.

Alex fell into another giggling fit and I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. What is wrong with him? I’ve never seen him act like this and from the few days I’ve kinda known him, he doesn’t seem to be this happy. Like at all.

“Ignore him, Jack. He’s…well, not himself right now.” Rian explained, moving so he was facing me instead of leaning against the wall next to Alex.

“What do you mean?” I questioned.

“He took something for the pain. A little too much if you ask me.” He hinted, grabbing the sides of Alex’s left knee.

I looked back at Alex in time to see his knees fly to his chest as laughter took over him, forcing him into tears. He leaned forward, swatting Rian’s hand from his knee before he finally calmed down.

“Ri-Ri, stawppp.” He giggled.

I smiled at how cute and carefree he seemed when he was in this state. Then I remembered yesterday and how much he was bleeding.

“Wait, so he’s okay? Is he on medication or something?” I asked, frowning when I realized it was really none of my business.

“Yeah, he’s fine and I guess you could say he’s on meds right now. He’s just pretty high from taking to much.” Rian answered, not seeming to care that I pried into something that’s probably personal.

“Oh.” I mumbled.

So was he really complementing me when he said I was hot? Did he really think so or is he just delusional? He’s probably just way to out of it to realize what he’s doing. I bet he’ll be disgusted when he finds out he flirted with me without really knowing.

“At least he’s okay.” I added because really, I’m happy he’s okay.

I watched in amusement as Alex moved his fingers in front of his face with a crooked grin, only looking away when Rian cleared his throat.

“Yeah. Thanks for uh..for helping yesterday. You didn’t have to do that, but you did and I’m thankful.” He told. “You’re a good person, Jack.”

I smiled softly, a warm feeling filing my gut at the compliment. It makes me feel good when people tell me I’m a good person. It makes me feel proud of myself.

“It was no problem. I’m glad I could help.” I smiled.

He nodded, rubbing the back of his neck and sighing. Uh oh, is this where he tells me we can’t be friends anymore? Was Kellin right when he said not to trust them or get close?

“Listen Jack…I just-“ He started, sighing unsurely.

“You want me to stop talking to you.” I frowned, looking down. “I get it-“

“No!” Rian exclaimed.

I looked up, raising my eyebrows expectantly.

“Oh, what is it then?” I wondered curiously.

What could he possibly have to tell me if it’s not about us not being friends anymore?

“I just, I know you’re gay and believe me, I have no problem with that.” He started again, smiling softly at me.

“How’d you know?” I asked quietly.

I fought the urge to look down and bite my lip, instead keeping my gaze locked on Rian’s while he smiled a bit bigger.

“I could tell by the way you blushed at the things Alex said earlier.” He replied.

“Oh.” I mumbled, blushing again.

“Anyways,” He continued. “I don’t want you to get hurt, okay? You’re a good kid and I-just…don’t get to close to Alex. Okay? He’ll only hurt you in the end and I don’t want to see that happen to you…so don’t start to crush on him, okay?”

I bit my lip, furrowing my eyebrows. He’ll only hurt you in the end. Is Alex gay? Does that mean Alex is gay?

“Oh…yeah. Sure, yeah.” I nodded, looking back to Alex who was now unconscious. “Don’t worry, I don’t like him like that.”

I bit my lip after the words slipped out of my mouth, wondering if I just lied or not.

“Good.” He grinned. “I’m glad I could tell you that before it was too late.”

The nervous butterflies filling my stomach when I looked at Alex told me that it might actually be too late, but that doesn’t mean I can’t keep my feelings to myself. Alex wouldn’t ever like me anyway, so it’ll be that much easier to ignore these feelings before they get stronger.