Don't Forget Me

I paced. To the kitchen, to the living room, past the bathroom and into my room. Then back to the kitchen and repeat. The walls of my basically bare apartment echoed my footsteps back at me. It's almost as if they were mocking me.

How could we let this happen? We were so cautious, I made sure of it every single time. My mind flipped through scenarios, desperately trying to connect the pieces. Maybe it was the night of Brielle's Thanksgiving break party. But I specifically remember Dave pulling a condom from his wallet that night.

Then I remembered. It had to be the weekend he visited me in Maryland before Christmas break. We were so caught up in the moment but I never thought twice about it afterwards. It was such an amazing night. The memory of his touch sent chills down my spin.

I stopped pacing and fished my phone out of my bra.

"Hey sugar," Dave's voice rang through the phone. I heard a voice followed by some female laughs on the other side of the line. A pang of jealousy shot through my body.

"Are you busy?" I asked cooly into the phone.

"No, no," he insisted and I heard the background noise fade until it was completely quiet. "I just got to New York to hang out with James for a few days." I already knew that.

"Any way you could swing by Maryland for a visit?" I questioned causally, dropping my arm when I realized I was twirling my hair with my free hand. I rolled my eyes at myself. I could almost feel his radiant smile through the phone.

"Of course I can, I miss my girl," he started and I internally sighed. His girl. "I won't be interrupting your studies?" He teased. It was my turn to smile.

"You're my favorite kind of distraction," I retorted slyly with a smirk even though he couldn't see it.

"I'll be there by tomorrow evening."

It was finally August 17th. I woke up extra early to be certain that I was up before Alayna. It would be just us today. The rest of our family and friends were on the other side of the country.

I flipped a pancake over to ensure it was cooked before plating it. Two separate plates with full breakfasts and orange juice with both were set out on the table. I made a tower of whipped cream on top of the small stacks of pancakes and smiled at my work.

I thought back to this day, three years ago. My mother stood next to my hospital bed, encouraging me to breathe. I remember crying out in pain, begging the doctor to make it stop but I knew he couldn't. I kept sneaking glances towards the doorway, but he never came. Even though I hadn't seen or spoken to him in almost nine months, I still sent him a text. It's time, Dave. Today's the day. He never replied.

Labor and delivery were especially hard without him there. My body was drained and the pain and emotional damage took a toll on me. The second I saw my sweet baby girl's face, none of that mattered anymore. My heart melted and nothing was the same after that moment. But that didn't change the fact that he wasn't there.

I wondered if maybe he changed his number or something. Maybe that's why he never got ahold of me. There was even a time where I called his brother to make sure Dave was still alive and well.

I sighed out loud. Picking up the plastic tiara that read "birthday girl" from the counter, I made my way quietly to Alayna's bedroom. The small girl began to stir as I sat on the edge of her bed and brushed her auburn hair from her face. She opened her eyes and whined for a slight moment until she realized it was her birthday. Her eyes shot open and she was suddenly wide awake. I laughed as she sat up quickly.

"Good morning, birthday girl!" I greeted her and I offered the crown to her. She smiled so big I'm certain it had to of hurt her cheeks. She put the crown on top of her messy bed head.

"It's finally here, mommy!" She squealed in excitement with bright eyes. I chuckled and nodded. Alayna then jumped out of bed and her little legs led her to her dresser. She opened the bottom drawer where her pants were kept. I watched as she pulled out a piece of light blue construction paper. "I made a picture for you," her little voice said, "I've been waiting to give it to you."

I took the paper from her hands. If I hadn't been looking at her art since she was old enough to hold a crayon, I would be completely at a loss by the scribbles. But with my mom vision, I saw two people, a little girl and a bigger girl, with a birthday cake between them. There were balloon and some sort of what I'm guessing was flowers all around. With a warm smile, I almost teared up. It was just like my baby girl to give me something on her special day. She climbed back onto her bed and wrapped her arms around my neck to hug me.

"How about breakfast, baby?" I asked her as I swept her into my arms while she was still hugging me. We walked to the kitchen and she hummed the whole way. I wasn't sure what song it was, and I don't think she knew either but I enjoyed it.

The child's beautiful eyes lit up at the meal in front of her. It was her favorite breakfast that I only made on special occasions. Chocolate chip pancakes with whipped cream on top with syrup on the side. I was going to have a very hyper three year old on my hands all day.

"So what do you want to do today, Lane?" I asked her with a smile as I watched her cut into her first bite with her little fork.

"Hey," Dave greeted me with a kiss as he walked through the door. I felt sick to my stomach as I closed the door behind him. I forced a grin as he set his bag down on the floor. "I figured I'd stay here for a night before I head home. I have an audition on Wednesday." I nodded.

"Okay," I started quietly. Sucking my bottom lip in, my teeth began to bite down and tear the flesh apart. Nerves were getting the best of me.

We weren't officially together. I wasn't even sure if I was the only girl he was sleeping with. We lived on different sides of the country and we both had entirely different paths in life. I was in my first year of med school and he was beginning to get good roles in tv shows and movies. How would we ever even make this work? How could we raise a child?

"Izzie," he stared with concern laced in those dark eyes, "what's wrong?" I exhaled the breath I'd been holding in.

"Come sit with me?" I suggested, moving towards the couch. He followed, taking a seat close to me. "I missed you," I told him, tempted to lean into his body.

"I missed you too, sugar, but I'm here now." I could tell he was confused.

I met Dave Franco exactly a year ago but I knew I loved him with all of my heart. Some days I believed I just loved him as a best friend with benefits but in the depths of my heart, I knew I was in love with him. For whatever reason, I just had a hard time accepting that. Perhaps I had convinced myself from the very beginning that he was too good for me. An upcoming movie star would never go for a girl like me.

"I have to tell you something," I swallowed the lump in my throat. Dave leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. "But you have to promise not to freak out." He raised a thick eyebrow at me.

"I promise I won't freak out," the overly attractive man urged me on. There was no turning back now. I had to tell him.

"Dave," I stalled, attempting to gain confidence. He just watched me... It was clear as day that I was a nervous wreck. "I'm pregnant." The perplexed expression dropped from his face. His features were simply blank. After a few moments, he spoke.

"Is it mine?" He questioned, his voice so soft I could barely hear his words. I nodded. "How far?"

"13 weeks," I answered his question, staring at my feet. I was terrified to look back at his face. Upon hearing him sigh, I finally rose my eyes to meet his. His face was still painfully blank. I couldn't find any emotions, even deep in his eyes.

"I'm gonna go for a walk," he spoke suddenly, almost making me jump. He stood from the couch and scooped his bag up. "I'll be back," he mumbled and closed the apartment door behind him.

He didn't come back. That was the last time I saw Dave Franco.

Before leaving California, I received four checks in the mail signed by David Franco. I got one every few months. Each of them were for two thousand dollars.

I wasn't oblivious. I saw his movies. Sure, I sobbed the whole time but I still watched. It was a relief to see his face...to hear his voice. He was doing great for himself. Dave got to live out his dreams while mine were crushed.

"Aright," I spoke softly to myself as I struggled to open the front door of my Atlanta apartment. Laney was just about asleep on my chest after a long morning and lunch at the zoo. There was nothing better than watching your child admire the animals that were seven times her size.

Not even two seconds after I closed the door behind me there was a timid knock. I groaned a little as the noise woke the small child in my arms. She lifted her head as I opened the door and she let out a sleepy yawn.

Those dark eyes I remembered so clearly were first set upon Alayna. Dave took her in. His face read regret and a hint of shock. He was surprised how much she resembled him. Just as Alayna drew in a breath to say something, he flashed his daughter his award winning smile.

"Happy birthday..." he finally looked at me, waiting for me to assist him.

"Alayna," I finished. He gave me a small nod.

"Happy birthday, Alayna," he repeated to her, pulling out a small pink box. She began squirming in my arms so I set her down to her feet and her excited hands reached as high as she could to take the box.

Little fingers tore into the wrapping paper until a box with a jeweler's logo was revealed. My daughter was beaming up at me as she worked the box open. A gasp left her lips as she looked at the necklace her new friend had brought her. On the small chain, there was a beautiful diamond, surrounded by smaller ones, making a flower. Plain and simple, but gorgeous. She handed it to me before she flung her arms around him, repeating "thank you" over and over. His laugh boomed down the hallway of the apartment.

"Come in," I offered to Dave as Alayna bounced into the living room, once again admiring her new shiny gift. He followed her in.

"You can have cake and ice cream with us!" She didn't have a care in the world. The child didn't even know this man's name. He shot me a look, almost asking for approval.

"I'd love to," he told her, his charm putting his daughter in awe.

"But first, someone needs to take a nap. That was our deal, remember?" I spoke to the girl, reaching down for her hand. She whined a few choice words, but otherwise obeyed and walked back to her room with me where she changed into more comfortable clothes and laid down in bed.

Dave slid his phone back into his pocket as I entered the room. He stood, but still avoided my eyes.

"Would you like something to drink?" I asked politely. He looked older but not by very much. Though he did have some more muscle to him. He still looked as great as ever. I couldn't help but to wonder what he thought about me after all these years.

I set a glass of ice water in front of him at the kitchen table. He thanked me quietly and I took a seat across from him. Dave didn't touch his water but his eyes watched the condensation drip down the cold glass for what seemed to be hours. I eventually spoke up.

"You never came back." His attention shot up to me. There were many emotions that you would rarely see peak through Dave Franco's facade. One of those was regret. Another was sadness. But I spot them both clearer than the Georgia sky.

"I'm sorry." I couldn't tell if he actually meant it or if he just felt it was appropriate to say. "I was scared." I nodded shortly.

"I was too," I countered to make a point. With a sigh, he dropped his eyes from mine, reconnecting his vision with his water.

"She's beautiful," he told me. "She looks like you and my mom. You did a great job, Iz." I almost cringed at the nickname as it left his lips. His perfect lips. His brown eyes rose to meet mine. "I want to be here now. I was terrified before but now I realize what's important. I feel so guilty for leaving you do to this on your own. I've gone three years with a reminder that somewhere I had my own flesh and blood that I didn't even know. Whatever you'll let me do, Izobelle, I'm here. Whether you want me to be a father or a friend, I can do that."

Drawing in a deep breath, I stopped myself from tearing up. This time it was me who avoided eye contact. Technically I couldn't stop him from being a real father to his child. I don't think I wanted to either. For over three years I dreamed of the day he would come back into my life. My imagined a perfect family. We would be in love and our daughter would be our world.

"I want more than anything for you to be in Alayna's life," I told him after a few silent moments. "But we need to take it slow. You can't just jump into her life and tell her that you're her daddy." His gorgeous features broke into a contagious grin.

"Thank you so much."

Not alone, I'll be there
Tell me when you want to go