The Black Swan

It seemed like Jenna was going to kill Matt and he sounded like he was just about to redo the favor, but as for me and Brian... we hadn’t gotten very far from the Sanders threshold, we were still there. On the porch. Barely speaking with one another and patiently waiting for somebody to open the god damn door, so I could make sure Jenna was alive and breathing, but no.

„Would you, please, go away from the door?” Brian sounded rather angry smoking his already third cigarette, while texting someone every two minutes.

„I can’t, I’m afraid for her life...” I tried to make out the picture by looking through the door pane, but I saw absolutely nothing. Just an absolute darkness. Every now and then I heard Jenna’s loud yell as she insulted Matt, calling him words I, personally, heard for the first time, making notice she was alive after all.

„She’ll be fine...” Brian took a drag, before continuing, „Shads would never hurt her, he’s head over heals in love with her, which I really don’t get.”

„What do you mean?” I leaned against the brown door, tilting my head back as I looked over his dark nape.

„I think you know what I mean.” Was it just me, or was he truly not that willing to talk to me? He cracked up about something he saw in his phone, locking me out fully. Fine.

I surveyed the surroundings, noticing Matt lived in a really nice neighborhood. Looking over the wonderful houses made me want to sell my condo and move in to one of these wonderful homes, but we all knew I was not a house person. I hated mowing the lawn and gardening in general. So did Jenna, but I guess true love outgrows every obstacles. It got really silent and I couldn’t hear even Jenna’s loud insults. Had he done it? Had Matt really killed his fiancé?

Brian’s phone started ringing, making me jump a little.

„Hey baby,” He spoke in a voice that I had never heard him speak before. Ever. His shoulders started shaking as he laughed on something one of his many girlfriends said, „No, no, not today. I’m a little per occupied... No, of course not.” He remained silent for quite a while and I thought the girl had hung up on him, but no, what I heard made me really explode in laughter, „Your parents? Babe, I think we need to slow down,” In other words for those who didn’t speak Synyster Gates, this was his way of saying he needs the girl just to have someone to bone. „No, I’m busy on that date... Fine, let me check,” Check what? Oh, right, he pretended like he was checking if he’s free. Doh. I couldn’t hide the amusement. I know it was wrong to eavesdrop on someone’s conversation, but what you gonna do, right? „Yeah, I can’t make it... It’s hard to tell. I’ll call you. Okay bye.”

I chuckled, making him look over his shoulder with quite an irritated glance, „What?”

„Oh, no, nothing, just,” I made an imaginary phone out of my fingers and put it next to my ear, „Hi, my name’s Synyster Gates and I’m a complete ass. Press one if you want the regular fuck, press two if you want it from behind, press three-„

„You can shut up now,” He hissed, cutting me off. He turned half of his body so he was sitting with his side towards me.

„Or you could leave a message, bye.” I pulled my imaginary phone away from my ear, making a gesture of ending the call. „Do you even know her name?”

„That’s really none of your business,” Brian retorted, sliding the black iPhone in his front pocket.

„I just want you to be ready, when you meet her parents.” I smiled sweetly, noticing how it pissed him off. You know what really pissed me off? I was right about mister asshole since the first day I met him.

„Since when did you become such a nosy old trout?” He rolled his eyes as he stood up, brushing some ash from his cigarettes off his black pants.

„Excuse me?” I nearly choked on my own saliva. „An old trout?” I snorted, before stepping few steps closer, in huge disbelief, „Oh, I’m sorry mister popular for being way past my majority.” Would any of those girls bare with a thirty year old, if he wouldn’t provide their fifteen minutes of fame? Would they really hang out with him when the liquor’s out? I wouldn’t know, cause the liquor never ran out.

„You know maybe you should even try it. Would do good to you,” He laughed at his own remark, thinking of it as a great comeback.

„Dating teenagers?” I asked confused. Yeah, because I was so willing to wind up in jail for pedophilia.

„Getting laid.” Oh okay, let’s clap for the fucking genius. He just saw right through me.

„Wow...” I exclaimed throwing my arms in the air, before they landed by my side with a thud, „Really didn’t see that one coming, gramps. I would even ask how old exactly you are, but I know you can’t count that high.”

„You know, baby, if you had a life of your own, you wouldn’t feel the need to shove your nose in other peoples life. I hear they’re not that pricey on ebay nowadays. You should take a look.” He was about to go away, but in the very last moment he turned around and said something, that really touched a string, „Even for a bartender in very big debt, you should have no problem buying it, I could even lend you the money, just say the word.”

„For a gramps, who has a life,” I squinted my eyes on him, „You sure know a hell lot about me.” How did he know I was in debt? Beats me, but he was right. The Black Swan just turned out to be something more than I could carry.

„Why won’t you just shut up?” He roared straight in my face and for a second I thought he was going to hit me. Well the clenched fist clearly said he wanted to. What stopped him?

„Why don’t you just walk away?” I asked calmly, noticing a big amount of Laphroaig in his breath, „It’s what you do... It’s what you good at, right?”

„Guys?” A low, seemingly satisfied voice came behind me, making me and Brian look behind.

„What?” We yelled in unison, seeing Matt smiling widely, his arm wrapped around Jenna’s waist. So I guess they had it all figured out, which I couldn’t say for me and Brian.

„We... We just wanted to say we’re all good,” Matt frowned, seeing me and Haner few seconds away from kicking each other’s ass. Guess who would win? Me of course, I never played fair. „But it seems you’re not...”

„What happened?” Jenna asked in a quiet voice. Oh, so she could be quiet. That was something new.

„Ask her,” Brian barged inside, not even minding Jenna and Matt standing in his way. Once they regained from the encounter, the tide wave called Synyster Gates, they looked at me waiting for answers.

„Well?” Jenna urged, raising her eyebrow on me. I just stood there with my mouth open, realizing they blamed me for his shitty mood. What?

„You know fuck this!” I laughed out awkwardly, before I started yelling, „Fuck him and fuck you both!” I pointed out to the couple, „Have a fucking good night, I’m very much fucking done.”

This was my time to walk away. To imagine I would sit next to a person, who insulted me in ways I had never heard before, it was like sitting next to Jenna if I was Will. Instead of being constantly glared at, I could be home, in my own comfy bed.

„Oh now you’re walking away?” And there was Brian, yet again. He was pissed for me being here and he was pissed for me going away. Go and figure. I just raised my middle finger in the air, not even looking at the front door as I disappeared behind the palm trees.

„Gates, man what are you doing?” I heard Matt shout.

„Just let her go!” Jenna added. Right now I got shaky knees, he was drunk and mad. And I didn’t even know if he saw me as a girl anymore. The thing that I said earlier, that I would win a fist fight with him, yeah, well I kind of lied. Obviously. I heard him make a small run, before he grabbed my arm, turning me around.

„So now you’re going to hit me, like you hit Andrew yesterday?” For once in this whole evening, he looked more confused than mad.

„No,” He shook the confusion away, „I’m going to do something far more worse.”

His lips crashed against mine as he pulled me closer. He had never kissed me like this. I could feel his anger, his confusion and something I couldn’t even describe, all of it laid in this kiss. I could taste Laphroaig off his lips, like he had downed a whole bottle before running after me. It seemed like he didn’t care if I responded to it or not, he just kept going, holding the back of my head with his hand and my back with his other. I felt trapt, I couldn’t do anything. He was holding me pressed against his hard body and I could feel the thirst, the hunger in his every action. We both were panting heavily once he pulled away, boosting his forehead against mine. „I wish I could hate you... but I can’t.”