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All it takes is another hit to the stomach and I’m down for the count. The pain is excruciating and only getting worse with every minute that passes.
“Haven't you learned yet you worthless faggot! You mean nothing to anyone! The only person that ever gave a shit about you is gone and it’s your entire fault because you are worthless! I never wanted you to be born and the only person that did is no longer here! She should still be here, not you! You were the one that should've died in that car wreck!” my drunkard father tells me.
He continues to rain down his punches to my body and face without an end in sight.
“You worthless…”
Punch.
“Piece…”
Punch.
“Of shit.”
Punch.
I lay there waiting for another blow but it never comes. Instead I hear the door slam shut knowing he won’t be back until the wee hours of the morning. I continue to lie on the floor and wait for some of the most intense pain to subside. As I wait, I remember the distant times where I was once part of a loving, caring family. The times before my mother passed away.
Being my family was very religious, it came as quite a shock to my parents that I would come out to them as gay. However, they were reacted better than I could’ve hoped for. They told me that it was ok; that it didn’t make a difference who I loved a long as I was happy. I knew my mom would be loving and understanding but I was terrified of my father’s reaction. He grew up in a very conservative, very religious, very strict family. However, little did I know, he shared her view. He said it didn’t matter and that he was proud that I was brave enough to come out to them. That was when I was 15. In less than a year it all changed and my world became dark. I lost the spark for life that I once had.
It just started as any other day. I was spending a relaxing day with my parents. We are on our way to the cinema to see a movie. We were going through the intersection and it never occurred to the driver in the other car blowing through the intersection to stop before he could hurt somebody. Unfortunately, that thought never came to him. He slammed into the front passenger side of the car; he slammed right into my mother. She never stood a chance. That drunk driver destroyed an entire family that day. My father was never the same. He changed his acceptance of me because he thought that the accident we were in was my fault because I was gay. From that day forward, I knew there was only going to be one person that was going to love me from then on, Jack.
Jack was the only thing that could get me through my day even after going through the rampages of my father. Jack was my breath of fresh air, the only reason for me to keep going in life instead of just killing myself to get away from the anger and rage of my father. Jack is unlike anyone I have ever met. He helps anyone and everyone even if he isn’t going to get anything in return. He is a wonderful and loving human being that I am so lucky to call my own. He is everything to me; I would give him the stars if I could, as long as it would make him happy.
Just thinking about Jack is giving me enough strength to get up and see him. He makes the pain lesson, both physically and mentally. I stand up and hobble over to the door and make my way outside and down the street to Jack’s home which, in reality, is the only place that I can also call home. The pain is excruciating but I know that once I make it home, Jack will take care of everything. He’ll bandage me up, give me ice to ease my bruises, and place kisses upon my cut lips which will heal more than he can ever understand.
A painful 15 minutes later, I arrive with Jack waiting on the porch for me. He runs up to me but all I can do is breakdown sobbing, just wishing for things to go back to the way they were before the accident. Jack, the loving individual that he is, just pulls Alex into his arms, lifts him up, carries him inside and lays him down on his bed so that he can begin to inspect his injuries. The tears slowly begin to fade as he is cleaning and repairing the wounds made on my body and soul. As always, he asks me, “Why?” It is honestly a loaded question. Why do I allow my father to do this every day when I can just as easily turn him in? Why do I continuously go back to the house when I can just stay here with Jack? Why do I continue to choose the things that hurt me? Truthfully, there is no real answer. In a way, I feel obligated to go back to my father so that he isn’t all alone but with the way that he leaves me, that feeling of guilt to stay is diminishing more and more.
“You’re staying here from now on, Alex. I don’t give a shit if you think your father is going to feel all alone. You can’t go back there! What if he goes too far and I never get to see you alive again? What if the next time I see you it’s as your body is being lowered into a grave? Do you even think about me in all of this?! What would I do if you weren’t here anymore? I would have no will or reason to live. You’re it, Alex. You are everything to me and if you get hurt so bad that…that you die, I will not stay on this Earth much longer after I find out about that.” Jack was in tears now. He couldn’t stand to see the amazing blonde haired boy that held his heart, in such shambles. You would think that Jack was receiving some of the abuse as well from the way he always felt after having this conversation with Alex each and every time he came to his house to be cleaned up and would then have to watch him leave.
However, this time, the conversation was going to end differently. Alex was determined to make this end differently and to make them both happy. “I’m not leaving anymore, Jack. I’m done running back to the man that is supposed to be my father, to only regret it the minute I walk back into that house. You’re the only one that I want and need. I’m staying and I’m going to heal and we’re finally going to be happy together without any distractions. When I’m with you, I’m finally home.” Alex said with such conviction. Jack could do nothing but shed tears of joy when the boy of his dreams said the words he has been waiting so long to hear. He had no reason to be afraid any longer. He knew that there would be complications in getting everything sorted out to allow him to live at his house but, it didn’t matter. Alex had come home and he was finally here to stay.
“Haven't you learned yet you worthless faggot! You mean nothing to anyone! The only person that ever gave a shit about you is gone and it’s your entire fault because you are worthless! I never wanted you to be born and the only person that did is no longer here! She should still be here, not you! You were the one that should've died in that car wreck!” my drunkard father tells me.
He continues to rain down his punches to my body and face without an end in sight.
“You worthless…”
Punch.
“Piece…”
Punch.
“Of shit.”
Punch.
I lay there waiting for another blow but it never comes. Instead I hear the door slam shut knowing he won’t be back until the wee hours of the morning. I continue to lie on the floor and wait for some of the most intense pain to subside. As I wait, I remember the distant times where I was once part of a loving, caring family. The times before my mother passed away.
Being my family was very religious, it came as quite a shock to my parents that I would come out to them as gay. However, they were reacted better than I could’ve hoped for. They told me that it was ok; that it didn’t make a difference who I loved a long as I was happy. I knew my mom would be loving and understanding but I was terrified of my father’s reaction. He grew up in a very conservative, very religious, very strict family. However, little did I know, he shared her view. He said it didn’t matter and that he was proud that I was brave enough to come out to them. That was when I was 15. In less than a year it all changed and my world became dark. I lost the spark for life that I once had.
It just started as any other day. I was spending a relaxing day with my parents. We are on our way to the cinema to see a movie. We were going through the intersection and it never occurred to the driver in the other car blowing through the intersection to stop before he could hurt somebody. Unfortunately, that thought never came to him. He slammed into the front passenger side of the car; he slammed right into my mother. She never stood a chance. That drunk driver destroyed an entire family that day. My father was never the same. He changed his acceptance of me because he thought that the accident we were in was my fault because I was gay. From that day forward, I knew there was only going to be one person that was going to love me from then on, Jack.
Jack was the only thing that could get me through my day even after going through the rampages of my father. Jack was my breath of fresh air, the only reason for me to keep going in life instead of just killing myself to get away from the anger and rage of my father. Jack is unlike anyone I have ever met. He helps anyone and everyone even if he isn’t going to get anything in return. He is a wonderful and loving human being that I am so lucky to call my own. He is everything to me; I would give him the stars if I could, as long as it would make him happy.
Just thinking about Jack is giving me enough strength to get up and see him. He makes the pain lesson, both physically and mentally. I stand up and hobble over to the door and make my way outside and down the street to Jack’s home which, in reality, is the only place that I can also call home. The pain is excruciating but I know that once I make it home, Jack will take care of everything. He’ll bandage me up, give me ice to ease my bruises, and place kisses upon my cut lips which will heal more than he can ever understand.
A painful 15 minutes later, I arrive with Jack waiting on the porch for me. He runs up to me but all I can do is breakdown sobbing, just wishing for things to go back to the way they were before the accident. Jack, the loving individual that he is, just pulls Alex into his arms, lifts him up, carries him inside and lays him down on his bed so that he can begin to inspect his injuries. The tears slowly begin to fade as he is cleaning and repairing the wounds made on my body and soul. As always, he asks me, “Why?” It is honestly a loaded question. Why do I allow my father to do this every day when I can just as easily turn him in? Why do I continuously go back to the house when I can just stay here with Jack? Why do I continue to choose the things that hurt me? Truthfully, there is no real answer. In a way, I feel obligated to go back to my father so that he isn’t all alone but with the way that he leaves me, that feeling of guilt to stay is diminishing more and more.
“You’re staying here from now on, Alex. I don’t give a shit if you think your father is going to feel all alone. You can’t go back there! What if he goes too far and I never get to see you alive again? What if the next time I see you it’s as your body is being lowered into a grave? Do you even think about me in all of this?! What would I do if you weren’t here anymore? I would have no will or reason to live. You’re it, Alex. You are everything to me and if you get hurt so bad that…that you die, I will not stay on this Earth much longer after I find out about that.” Jack was in tears now. He couldn’t stand to see the amazing blonde haired boy that held his heart, in such shambles. You would think that Jack was receiving some of the abuse as well from the way he always felt after having this conversation with Alex each and every time he came to his house to be cleaned up and would then have to watch him leave.
However, this time, the conversation was going to end differently. Alex was determined to make this end differently and to make them both happy. “I’m not leaving anymore, Jack. I’m done running back to the man that is supposed to be my father, to only regret it the minute I walk back into that house. You’re the only one that I want and need. I’m staying and I’m going to heal and we’re finally going to be happy together without any distractions. When I’m with you, I’m finally home.” Alex said with such conviction. Jack could do nothing but shed tears of joy when the boy of his dreams said the words he has been waiting so long to hear. He had no reason to be afraid any longer. He knew that there would be complications in getting everything sorted out to allow him to live at his house but, it didn’t matter. Alex had come home and he was finally here to stay.
♠ ♠ ♠
Hey everybody! So this is my first oneshot and my first post on here so I would appreciate any criticisms. Anything will be greatly appreciated. Hope you enjoyed it. :)