Howl

Draco.

They were keeping her weak.

They chained her up – like some kind of animal – with bindings they had manifested. She stayed in the dining room so everyone could look at her and prod at her. For the most part, my own father kept me under a tight leash. We could never be along together.

“Lucius…” I bite down on the urge to smirk as a shiver runs down the length of my father. The Dark Lord regards him curiously. “Perhaps it’s time we let the boy speak with her, don’t you think? The poor child is allowing herself to wear away and it’s really such a waste.”

“Y-yes, my Lord.”

I try to hold my glee in as, knowing him, he would hold this opportunity in front of me and, knowing my yearning for her, snatch it away like a piece of meat.

I approach her slowly – she was in her Animagi state and I knew she was becoming increasingly suspicious of anyone in this house – and her dark eyes regard me warily. I hold my hands out, in a surrendering gesture, before sliding to my knees by her bristling shoulders.

“Lyall,” I whisper. She whines and turns her large, furry head in my direction. Sad eyes look up at me through the tresses of fur. “You have to eat.”

Lyall turns away from me with a huff. I know that all eyes are on us now.

I lower my voice and sidle nearer her so she’s the only one in the room who can hear me.

“Lyall,” I sigh her name. “I really miss curling up on that sofa with you, I miss sitting and laughing about life in the Great Hall with you. I miss the way you’d roll your eyes at everything with the peculiar smile on your face. I miss staying up late with you, I miss the way you’d cuddle up when you were tired. I miss you.”

By the time I took a breath to start again, I look up to see Lyall – my Lyall – sitting crossed legged and looking at me expectantly. I let out my breath in relief but I’m still worrying about her.
She had shed off weight since I had last seen her. Her dark eyes remained that way – dark, colorless. Her perfectly sculpted cheekbones were no longer that, now, they sagged and the bones beneath her now pale, ashen skin were more prominent than they should be.

She was letting herself wear away.

Lyall’s eyes waver on me as though filling up with water but I knew it was just the colour of her eyes fighting it out. I hold my breath but they stayed as they were.
“You can’t just give up like this, Lyall.”

“I’m never going to have a life, kultaseni, I do not see the point of doing anything other than giving up.” Lyall raises her nose up a fraction as though her refusal to try and live was her last shred of dignity and her only defence. “There’s not much to live for.”

“What about me?” I hate the way that my voice cracks.

Lyall drops her head, her eyes falling away from mine, and sighs. “Draco…” she takes a deep breath and I wait anxiously for her to continue. “Rakastan sinua, but tell me, what’s the point?”

“The point?” I almost laugh. “The world may not be the way you like it, Ly, but what about all the little things you used to love so much?”

“Mundane things.”

“So you don’t ever want to feel blades of grass passing over your bare feet?” I snap at her. “You don’t want to enjoy reading a book again? What about me, huh? I don’t care how selfish it sounds but you’re being equally as bad, Lyall, you can’t leave me. It’s not fair.”

“Haven’t you noticed?” Lyall barked a laugh and raised her chained wrists to gesture around us. I could see the marks where the metal bites into her skin and wince. “Life isn’t fair.”

We remain in silence for a moment that felt like forever.

“Lyall, I…” I gasp for breath and repress a shudder. I could feel red slitted eyes focusing on the nape of my neck, ready to pounce. “I told you that… I told you that I loved you. Isn’t that enough?”

We stare at each for what feels like an eternity. I stay deadly still as she raises a manacled, worn wrist and reaches for me in case any sudden movement startled her into herself again. Her slender fingers slide over my scruffy cheek gently and I cannot help myself from letting a sigh escape my lips while my eyes slide shut.

“Draco, I-I’d like something to eat and a bed to sleep in tonight. Tell them I’ll cooperate as much as I possibly can but please, don’t leave me.”



I sigh – almost happily – as I slip out of my room where Lyall’s sore body rested on my bed, quickly healing with a full stomach. In the library, I find my mother. She fingers the worn edges of a book but does not look up at me.

“If she’s anything like her mother,” she says. “she has more than cooperating on her mind.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“It means that, though she says it and practice what she says she may, she doesn’t plan on following him.”

“I—Mother?”

Finally, she looks up from the frayed edges of the book and meets my confused gaze.

“Just keep her safe for as long as she lets you.”

With those final, cryptic warnings, my mother slips out of the room, one again leaving me along with my dangerous thoughts.

What exactly did it mean that Lyall would cooperate even though she doesn’t have a plan to follow The Dark Lord like the rest of us? I was terrified she was going to get herself killed.

My mother was right, however. Deep down, I knew Lyall had no intentions of coming quietly. She may act for as long as possible, but when it comes down to it, she has ulterior motives for agreeing to help the –wrong – side.

I trudge back to my room where Lyall still slept soundly and lay down beside her. I watch her closely, my eyes flickering over every feature of her face. Beneath the sheets, I shuffle closer to her.

“What are you doing?” she mumbles in her sleep though her eyes do not open.

“I’m just trying to get closer to you.” Because I’m not sure how many hugs I have left to give you.

Lyall opens her eyes. Dark brown. It was something at least.

“Do you want to sleep with me, Draco?”

I smile at her – the first real smile in a long time – and wrap my arms around her. Lyall ducks her head beneath my chin with a sigh and pushes herself closer to me. She falls asleep quickly as she always does.

I don’t sleep that night. The words of mothers warning linger boldly in my mind, I wanted to shake Lyall awake and force her to just to do the wrong thing, the smart thing. Just this once. I needed her to understand that I couldn’t bare the thought of a world minus Lyall.

I couldn’t understand her. No matter how hard I try – I would never get a grip on her.

After what happened to her mother – which I’m still not all keyed in on – and her father and her brother, she had more reason than anyone to give up and let the darkness consume her. But she didn’t give in to them. She allowed herself to starve for days rather than join him. It was a wonder my mother and I were the only ones questioning her change of mind.

Lyall was so strong – a strength I couldn’t comprehend.

The next morning, I slip out of bed and dress. I left Lyall. I traipse downstairs, following the low murmur of voices. Bellatrix hisses: “How do you know she can be trusted?”

“The vanishing cabinet wouldn’t have been completed.” I snap, surprised at my own bravery. Several eyes turn to look at me. “She knew what I needed the cabinet for and she still helped me. So if you don’t think she can be trusted, ask yourself where you would be without her.”

Bellatrix furls her lips in distaste. “But her mother—”

“We know fine well who her mother was, Bella!” Zev growls at her. My eyes shift between them and my father. My mother hovered anxiously by my fathers elbow. “Her mother was an extraordinary witch, with talents far beyond your imagination.”

“We’re vulnerable.” Bellatrix twitches. “With her in the house, we’re all at risk.”

“She’s just a girl.” My mother puts in gently and Bellatrix snaps her head in her direction, spitting about my mother being soft. “The Dark Lord trusts her, Bella.”

“I don’t trust her.” Zev’s eyes lock with mine and he smiles cruelly. “I know her.”

“You don’t know her.” I state, raising my chin in the air definatly. “You don’t know a single thing about her.”

“Don’t I, boy?” Zev challenges. “Don’t I know a thing or two about my own daughter?”

I stare him strongly in the eyes but I don’t say anything.

Our argument is cut short when Snatcher tumbles in the door with a couple of unnamed Death Eaters, they’re dragging people in with them. I couldn’t take it much more. They already had Ollivander and the Lovegood girl in the dungeons below. Bellatrix began to cackle wildly and dance around the room. I avert my eyes.

Lyall was standing at the bottom of the winding staircase. With a sigh, I gesture her over to me and she presses close to me with her dark eyes imploring me for answers.

“They’re still looking for them – Potter and the others.” I explain. I knew she didn’t want to hear it. They were her friends.

Except this time it wasn’t just someone who might have a clue as to where they were. This time I caught a glimpse of bright red hair and intelligent eyes. Weasley and Granger – and Potter was never far behind.

“Draco… Lyall, come here.” Bellatrix coos gently at us. I can feel Lyall bristling gently next to me. I squeeze her around the waist. “Is it him?”

The boy she grasps is horribly disfigured, but I know it’s him. “I can’t tell.” I say, I lie. I glance down to see clear understanding on Lyall’s face and her mouth pressed firmly in a tight line. I can almost hear the cogs in her brain turning.

“What’s happened to his face?” Lyall’s eyes flicker to Hermione and I can see the regret in her eyes at the motion – Bellatrix zones in on Granger.

Harry’s dark, shielded eyes stare at Lyall questioningly. Lyall leans back into me. “Draco, I have to—”
“I know.” I say though my heart is breaking. She was going to get them out and leave with them or die with them. She was going to leave me. “I know, Lyall.”

“You know.” Lyall murmurs lowly, still with her eyes locked on Harry. “Then you should know—”

Harry and Ron are pulled away by the Snatchers and Bellatrix begins to torment Hermione. Lyall and I turn away, blocking out her screams. She had choose her timing perfectly or we were all dead.

“Lyall?”

“I love you.”

And then she was gone, replaced by the large wolf I had come accustomed to being around – now they were both going to leave. Lyall knocked me down before pouncing taking out our fathers, leaving them both uncocnious. She didn’t touch my mother.

I stayed on the ground and Lyall pounced and knocked Bellatrix away from Granger. I could hear Granger’s gasping breaths and Bellatrix’s terrified whimpers. I could see the midnight black fur of Lyall as she kept Bellatrix immobile on the ground.

It all happened in a matter of minutes and then my father was waking up and Harry was duelling with us…