Best Friends Means...

"It makes me feel uncomfortable, alright? For you to be showing me all of this affection."

"It never bothered you before, babe." He said, his green orbs staring at me.

"It never bothered me before we kissed, Harry."

"It's not like there's ulterior motives behind me kissing you on the cheek."

"I know, but..." I sighed, putting my head in my hands and staring down at the fabric of my skirt. I was holding back what I wanted to say but I was petrified to admit it to Harry.

"But...? You can tell me anything, Elle." He took my hands from me and placed kisses on the backs of both of them, squeezed them, and searched for eye contact from me. I knew as soon as our eyes met, I'd give in.

After a few seconds, his eyes caught me. "I'm scared that kiss made me realize I have feelings for you, and I don't want to screw up our friendship with that. I'm dumb and I shouldn't have these feelings for you, or I should have explored those feelings before now or, just. I don't know, Harry. It would never work out."

"Why wouldn't it? You should have told me before now, love." Harry didn't seem startled or bothered by what I had just admitted to him. "Because I've always wondered if I had feelings for you too."

"Don't just say that to make me feel less like an idiot, Harry." My eyes returned back to my lap where I was examining my dress yet again.

"I'm being honest." I heard Harry shifting beside me, and I started to feel the warmth of his body beside mine. "Look at me, El." I didn't move, I kept my glare straight. "Elle, damnit. Look at me." His voice rose, and my head snapped to look at him. "I would never lie to you. I would never do anything to hurt you, or lead you on."

I didn't know what to say back, so I said what I went over to Harry's house to talk about originally. "Harry, I don't know what I want. I need some time. Away from you." I stood up off the steps, wiping my dress off.

"Time away from me?" Harry had me cornered against the railing on the steps. "You haven't seen me in three god damn years and you need some time away from me?"

I tried pushing away from him but his arms had me locked in. "Harry, let me go."

"Elle, no. I spent the last 3 years of my life away from my best friend, talking to you and waiting to come back to you, and we kissed when I came back home. Big deal. It was wonderful, but it isn't going to change us if you don't want it to."

"But Haz-"

"Don't fucking interrupt me. We don't have to be anything. We can go back to those two best friends we were before, who laid around watching movies all day and cuddling and eating and laughing and making each other happy. You make me so much happier than anyone I've ever been around, and I've finally got you back." He squeezed my arms. "I've got you back here with me, and I want to keep seeing you and hanging out with you before I have to go. I promise I'll back off and try not to flirt with you as much. I won't kiss you. You can just figure out what you want, and I'll always be here for you if you need me, alright?"

"What about what you want, Harry?" I asked, my dark brown eyes finally connecting with his bright greens.

"I know what I want." He said, confidently.

"What do you-" I started to question, but he broke me off with a kiss. A strong, hungry, passion filled kiss. The kind that would've made me weak in the knees, but I was thankful I had the railing to lean up against so I wouldn't fall flat on my ass. Harry's large hands cupped my face on either side and my hands wrapped around his body, pulling me into him as I kissed back with a passion that matched his.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" I heard Kendall shrieking from the front door, then she slammed it shut and went back inside.

Harry was just chuckling and shaking his head. "I'll go deal with her. You go home, I'll have Niall come out here and wait till your cab gets here. Don't you have work tomorrow morning?" I nodded, it was sweet that he remembered. "Oh, one more thing." Harry walked the few steps back to me, cornering me against the railing again. "Did I make myself clear of what I wanted?"

I nodded, and mumbled, "But I said no kissing..." But he just gave me a dimpled grin, and walked inside. I reached in my bag to pull out my phone and dialed a cab. As I was giving directions, Niall walked out and sat on the steps beside me.

"Thanks."

"What did I do?" I asked the Irish blonde who was seated beside me.

"I think you just successfully got rid of that bitch." I laughed, and put my phone back in my purse.

"Cab should be here in a few minutes, you can go back inside, really."

"I'd rather not hear the arguments that are going on in there."

"Yeah, I wouldn't want to either." I checked my watch and sighed.

"Am I boring you?"

"No, no. I was just seeing what time it was. I'm starving. I've hardly eaten today and I walked out on dinner on my date."

"Wanna go grab something to eat? We can get the cab to take us there instead of your place?"

"Will they mind?"

"Nah, I wasn't really in the mood to go out tonight anyway. It is Sunday. They'll all be bickering the whole time, Harry's going to get in a ton of trouble tomorrow so he's a little on edge."

"Why's he getting in trouble tomorrow?"

"Ending this with Kendall is going to make everyone furious at him, but I really don't blame him. She's a ticking time bomb. I'm gonna go inside and let them know we're going. I'll be right back." I watched as Niall walked inside, and continued sitting on the steps. I looked to the left and saw a cab approaching the house. Just as I was about to turn around to get Niall, the door opened and Niall was all but sprinting out.

"War zone?"

"Pretty much. Let's go." Niall opened the back door for me and I climbed in, and he scooted in behind me. "Nando's?"

I laughed, remembering Harry telling me stories of how Niall loves Nando's so much. "Sure, that'll be fine."

On the way to the restaurant, Niall and I made small talk, and the awkward air between us was slowly disappearing. We arrived at the restaurant, ordered, and we were waiting for our food to come out.

"So, tell me about you and Haz?"

I sighed, "There's really too much to even say. I don't know where to begin."

"Then start at the beginning." Niall's eyes conveyed a look of sincerity, which reminded me of how often Harry looked at me like that when he was ready to have a conversation with me, and actually listen.

"Well, as you know, Harry and I have always been best friends, yeah? He went away on tour, I've literally... Not seen him for three years."

"He tried seeing you when he came home though." Niall's eyebrows were furrowed.

"Yeah, and I was at school, or... Rehab." I figured already I could trust Niall. "Before you say something, it was for the best. My dad died right before Harry left, and he helped me as much as he could through the phone and texts and skype, but I became more dependent on alcohol than anything else for my problems. I dropped out of school, and my mom made me go to rehab. But it didn't work, I still drink, and I don't know how to stop myself once I start. But I don't drink as much as I used to, so at least I have improved some." Niall was just looking at me, nodding his head. "Anyway... I admitted that to Harry, and I know it broke his heart, because I had been keeping this a secret for 3 years from him. I felt horrible, but I didn't want him away on tour and worrying about me. I'm not important enough for that."

"Yes you are, Elle. Harry adores you. If you could hear how much he talks about you on tour, you'd know that."

"I know he cares about me, but just, I don't know. I didn't want to bother him with my problems. I would much rather help him out with his problems than sort mine out. I just solve mine with the bottle. He offered to help me with that too, when I'm ready. So the yesterday we were hanging out, and he kissed me. We had never kissed before. I noticed ever since he got home, he was a lot more flirty and touchy with me, but I just figured that was Harry. He's always been flirty with me but just in a friendly way, it didn't really make me feel too uncomfortable until after we kissed."

"Why after?" Niall asked, concern written all over his face.

I shrugged, "I really don't know."

"Did it make you uncomfortable or are you afraid?"

"Petrified, really." I took a sip of my water, and paused for a moment. "Because I had never thought of Haz like that. He came back and he had grown up. He was more attractive, more smooth, not the awkward boy I used to be friends with. Underneath, he's still the same sweet and caring guy. Just a lot more attractive. And all of these thoughts are swimming in my head about what if? And what if this ruins our friendship, Niall? Just a stupid kiss."

"Don't let it ruin your friendship, babe. It'll only happen if you let it. But really, I think he does like you as more than a friend. I think he always has. Maybe being away from you for so long made him think about what he was missing. He'd always tell me about when you were having troubles with a guy that he knew he could treat you so much better than that, that you deserved to be treated better."

I felt my cheeks turn a deep shade of red, "Really?" Niall nodded, taking a sip of his water. "Well, I thought he was just humoring me tonight a little saying he thought he might have feelings for me too. I still think I need to step back and think about this. I mean this is... Years of friendship that could potentially be ruined."

"Don't think of it like that, think of it like a friendship turning into one of the best relationships you could ever have. He already knows everything about you. Everything you like, everything you want. He'll be that for you, I know he would."

Our food came as soon as Niall finished his sentence. We both dug in, finishing our meals in 20 minutes. Niall insisted on paying for my meal, and I eventually gave in. He hailed a cab for both of us and I climbed in.

"So what now?"

"Well, I really need to get home and relax some before work tomorrow morning."

"Mind if I come over? I don't really have anything else to do."

"Yeah, that'll be fine. I think I have a few bottles of wine we could break into, and some movies I haven't watched."

"Even better!"

"My roommate is gone too. She'll probably stumble in blitzed out of her mind, but she's pretty cool. She knows I'm friends with Harry, so she won't be shocked to see a member of One Direction in the house, if she even recognizes you. She had a date with some guy she's been flirting for months."

"Will she even come home?"

"Honestly, probably not." I said, looking out the window and I heard Niall let out a chuckle. We arrived back at my flat in a comfortable silence. "I'm going to go put on something more comfortable than this." I said, pointing at my dress. "The wine is in that glass cabinet over there, if you can't see. Pick out whatever white you want, the reds are Kaitlin's."

Niall gave me a thumbs up and I heard the cabinet click open, and the clinking of two glasses a few minutes later. I checked my phone for any text messages, but I had nothing. I sent a text to Harry to let him know what was going on.

Hey, Haz. Niall and I had dinner at Nando's- what a surprise. We came back to mine to watch a movie since he didn't have anything else to do. He's a nice guy. I wish you were here. :(

I walked over to my closet and picked out a pair of jogging bottoms, a white v-neck and a red zip up jumper. When I walked into the living room, Niall was already seated on the couch with our wine glasses almost full to the brim, the wine bottle on the coffee table and apparently he had picked out a movie.

"Well you didn't have to dress up so much, love." He chuckled out as I plopped down a cushion down from him.

"You must not know what a serving of white wine is, Niall!" He obviously had forgotten our conversation earlier about my drinking habit, but I figured one more time wouldn't kill me.

"You said bottles earlier! The more you fill your cup up, the less you have to get up to refill it. I picked out Finding Nemo if that's alright with you?"

I let out a cackle at his choice. "I was expecting something a little bit more age appropriate, but that'll do." I covered myself up with my blanket that always hangs off the back of the couch and threw an extra one over to Niall, which he covered up with, too. We were about 30 minutes into the movie when we finished the first bottle. I was already feeling the effects of the wine, but I wanted another glass. I stood up and excused myself to the kitchen to get another bottle.

"Elle? What are you getting?"

"Another bottle!" I walked into the living room, holding up another bottle of white wine. Niall walked over to me and grabbed it from my hand.

"Don't you think you should stop? You already seem like you're feeling that bit you've had there. Wait a little and you can have a few more glasses if you still want more. I won't drink anymore either, so we won't have to open that bottle."

I sighed and pouted, but maybe he was right. I heard my phone ring in my bedroom and I skipped off to my room to retrieve it, as I yelled at Niall to pause the movie.

"Hello?" I answered before checking the caller ID.

"What are you doing?" It was Harry, and I could tell by his slow slurr that was now even slower that he was drunk. Probably beyond drunk.

"Watching Finding Nemo! With Niall."

"He is such a child. Are you having fun? Are you okay?" I could hear some mumbling in the background, I couldn't quite tell where he was calling me from.

"Yeah, I had a few glasses of wine. But I'm stopping there for the night."

"Why? What made you decide to do that?"

"Uh, Niall talked me out of drinking more."

"Why would Niall know to talk you out of drinking more, babe?"

"Because I explained everything to him tonight. He asked, and I felt like I needed to tell someone that wasn't you. Just to get all of my feelings out. Don't be mad, Harry."

"I'm not mad. I'm irritated that it took you three years to tell me you had a drinking problem, but the first night you're having one on one time with Niall, you're spilling all of your secrets to him." His voice was speeding up and I could tell he was getting mad. Niall appeared in the doorway, shrugging his shoulders at me and I held up a finger and mouthed that I'd be off the phone in a few minutes.

"Harry, you should go. Have fun with everybody, and I'll text you in the morning. I've got work early and I need to be getting to bed soon. The movie is almost over."

I heard him sigh into the phone, "Bye, Princess."

I smirked, "Bye, Prince Harry." I put my phone back on the charger and returned to the living room. Niall had turned the TV off, thrown the wine bottle away and cleared the glasses away into the sink.

"It's getting late, and you need to go to bed. I think I'm just gonna go home now. Liam said they're leaving soon too, so I won't be home for too much longer. I hate to overstay my welcome here."

"Oh, Niall! Don't be ridiculous. You are always welcome here!" I was reminding myself of my mom. I walked over to Niall to give him a hug. "Thanks for being so kind tonight too, and listening. Being able to tell someone that isn't involved with this that Harry and I felt really good to get it all out."

"Anytime, I'm here for you." I told Niall goodnight, and sent him out of my flat after I made sure a cab was outside to pick him up. I crawled into my bed and immediately fell asleep.

---

Loud knocking was all I could hear as I shot up in bed. Maybe Kaitlin forgot her keys? I checked the phone on my bedside table- 3:45 AM. Seems as if she should have just stayed the night with Gavin. I yawned and slowly walked to my front door. I turned the outside light on, and checked the peephole. Harry's bright green eye was looking back at me. I unlocked the door and let him in.

"How did you know-?"

"Niall told me. I just had to come see you and make sure you were okay."

"Harry, it's 3:45 at night and I have to be awake in two hours. I'm fine. Go home and go back to bed." I stood there with my hands crossed, and fighting back yawns.

"I just, I had to tell you how I feel about you and what I'm going to say in the meeting tomorrow."

"Come tell me in bed so I can lay down. If I stand up too much longer, I'm not going to be able to fall back asleep." Harry reached and locked the door, and turned the lights off. He followed me back to my bedroom and as I turned around to shut the door, he had already stripped himself of almost all of his clothes. I'm glad my bedroom lights were off because my cheeks were on fire.

"So..." He started as we both climbed into my bed. "I like you. I want to pursue a relationship with you."

I giggled at his wording, "How drunk are you?"

"Just a little bit. Let me continue." I nodded, even though he couldn't see me. "Being away from you for three years, and having to listen to you talk about how you were going through bullshit with guys just made me realize-"

"Have you talked to Niall about what he and I talked about?"

"I really don't like being interrupted. But no, I haven't. Why?"

"Go on." I had never heard Harry snap at me like this, ever.

"It made me realize that you deserve to be treated better than that. And I want to be that guy who treats you like that. So when you came home, and I got to see you, really see you, I realized that I needed to start winning you over, and start treating you like the princess that you are. I'm going to tell management tomorrow that I'm done with Kendall and there's nothing they can do about it. If they refuse to let that happen, I'll say something on Twitter about it. I can't continue lying to everyone anymore. I want a real relationship. Not some forced relationship for publicity. I'm fucking sick of it. I want something real. I want you, Elle." By now, Harry had turned on his side and his face was so close to mine I could feel him breathing. I turned to face him, without saying anything. I didn't know what to say. "I don't want to jump into it, but I do want to try dating. We have such a strong friendship that I honestly think dating you would be even better than our friendship we've had. I know you better than anyone, and you know me better than I know myself."

"Then how did neither of us see this coming?" I asked, slowly feeling myself drifting off into sleep.

Harry paused for a few seconds, then quietly spoke, "Because, love is blind. We couldn't see what was right in front of us."

But I was already asleep, and thought I was dreaming those words.