I'm Not Insane

"Oh no," she whispered sitting down beside me, she grabbed my hand and held it tightly. "It'll be okay."

"Miss Tantos?" a nurse aid walked over to me, leaning down sweetly. "I need you to come with me dear."

"Why?"

"Because, Mr. Richards has suggested you be taken into a treatment for today," she smiled brightly.

That girl—was me.

“No.”

“Excuse me?” She asked softly.

“No.”

"I'm sorry sweetheart but that's not up for you to decide," she smiled and waved over two male orderlies, one was brunette and the other was redheaded.

"No!" I shouted leaning back, Leana's eyes widened and she pushed one away.

"You can't take her, she doesn't need treatment!"

“Leana,” James looked over and sighed.

“Don’t fucking touch her!”

"They have too," he whispered as he picked her up and pulled her away as she screamed. "Stop or you'll get it."

"She can't get it," Leana shouted. "People go crazy from that!"

"She's already crazy, honey you're in an insane asylum."

"She's not crazy," Leana whispered as I struggled away from her, everything was silent, fading and everything seemed slow motioned like in movies when the lead character is fighting the bad guys, but in the end they get saved. I wasn't going to get saved, I was going to get shocked.

"Leana! Don't let them hurt me!" I shouted with tears falling down my face. "I'm not insane Leana, tell them I'm not insane!"

“Leana,” James put his hand over Leana’s mouth as she clung to him and cried.

“Please, no…” I whimpered.

"Come on now Miss Tantos, don't fight back," the nurse smiled as she opened a door to the left, I screamed on last bloodcurling scream as they lifted me through the doorway.

"Don't do this!" I screamed again. "I'm not insane, I swear to you. I'm just different."

“Listen,” A nurse snapped. “We can do this the easy way or the hard way.”

"Then do it the hard way bitch because I'm not backing down!" I shouted in her face as I struggled harder against the two men, when the brunette dropped me, I jumped up and ran towards Leana, but the redhead caught me by the waist. "Leana! Tommy said he wouldn't let this happen to me! They can't do this!"

"Cordelia!" Leana sobbed trying to get away from James. "Fight them! Don't let them take you!"

“Leana, please,” James spun her around and held her shoulders. “You have to let her go.”

“I can’t!” She sobbed.

"Being different isn't the problem, being the same makes you do this!" I shouted kicking my legs. "I like being different because I don't have to be ashamed of what the same people do to us, I have to be ashamed for what they don't see in us. We're not crazy you mother fuckers!"

"Let her go," James whispered looking at me.

"Leana," I laid limp as my eyes dried out. "I don't want to change."

“Please,” Leana whimpered. “Let her go.”

“Fine,” The nurse growled, dropping me to the ground as Leana and James rushed up to me.

"They let me go," I whispered as Leana pulled me into a bone crushing hug. "They let me go."

"We're getting Mr. Richards," the nurse shouted. "And he'll tell us what to do, shock treatment or solitary."

“Please be solitary,” I whined as James looked down to Leana and I.

“Leana,” He said softly. “You might get in some trouble as well.”

“Fuck, why?”

“Resisting.”

“Damn,” She frowned and looked up to him with pleading eyes.

"Leana," I whispered as the two orderlies held me still, after pulling me away from her. "Walk away, I don't want you in trouble, just walk away."

"But I—"

"Please," I whispered as Richard stepped up from behind the nurses station and made his way over. "Go now."

"Okay," she whispered in defeat as she turned and walked away whimpering.

"Miss Tantos, resisting treatment," he tisked and frowned, "That's solitary."

"Oh thank go—"

"But first is shock treatment, you need to be treated before punished," he smiled.

“No,” I whispered. “Please don’t. Just put me in solitary.”

“We have to do the shock treatment.”

“No!”

"Yes ma'am, boys take her back to room 503 and get the machine warmed up, I'll be back there soon," Richard smirked as he walked away.

"You can't do this!" I screamed kicking again, they weren't taking me down without a fight. "You can't!"

"Oh but we can.”

“Thomas!” I cried. “Don’t let them hurt me! Someone!”

"Shush now," the nurse said as they men took me in the room and started to struggle putting a straightjacket on me. "Alright Miss Tantos, relax."

"Don't do this," I sobbed as they tied the back and sat me down roughly on an old worn out mattress. "Please, Thomas said they wouldn't do this."

"We have to," The nurse sighed and tightened the top straps.

"Please, no..."