I Don't Want to be Alone

Kellins pov:
The alarm buzzed beside my bed and I groaned as I rolled over to turn it off, I was closer than I thought to the edge of the bed and landed on the floor wrapped in my duvet. I groaned again in pain. I heard a giggling from the other side of the room and looked up to see Vic curled up on the sofa with his notebook. We were touring for the Collide With The Sky album and were sharing a hotel room as we were all sick of the cramped tour buses. Me and Vic were sharing as we were shit at rock paper scissors.

I dont know when it started, the butterflies and racing heart everytime we were so much as in the same room but I couldnt help it, i'd fallen for him, my bestfriend. I always thought I was straight but things haven't been the same since we met. The worst part is he's my bestfriend and he would never love me back. I smiled sadly to myself and stood up shuffling groggly over to the bathroom for a shower. I stood there under the warm, soothing water feeling my muscles relax, and tipped my head back to let the water hit my face."I love you Vic"

Vics pov:
I could hear the shower running from where I was sat cuddled up on the sofa with my notebook. I couldnt help but imagine him naked, only a few feet away with water running over his hot body. NO! I scolded myself crossly. He was my best friend, I couldnt think of him like that. If he found out he would hate me forever. Think I was a freak. I couldnt lose him. I glanced back down to my notebook at the words scribbled across the page.
'Id give up forever to touch you,
cos I know that you feel me somehow,
your the closest to heaven that i'll ever be and I dont want to go home right now.'
I sighed closing my notebook and leaned back closing my eyes and listening to the rythematic sound of the shower, a smile on my face.

Suddenly the shower went off and Kellin stepped out of the bathroom with nothing on but a towel around his waist. Droplets of water dripping from his hair and running down his chest. I stared for a moment, imaging my hands tracing lightly down his chest until my fingers reached his-
"Ughmm"
I snapped out of my fantasy by the sound of Kellins cough, shit, how long had I been staring! I looked up to his face and smiled awkwardly, not quite looking him in his peircing blue eyes.
"So, were performing this afternoon then interviews, but were free this morning..." Kellin said trailing off as if expecting me to suggest something to do to fill the time.
"Well we could always go grab something to eat, i'm starving" I replied, realizing just how hungry I was. As if on cue my stomach rumbbled causing Kellin to laugh, he was so gorgeous when he laughed, tipping his head back slightly and showing his beautiful teeth. I had the sudden urge to kiss him. God I have to stop this!

"Yeah i'm pretty hungry too" he said patting his stomach "I'll go get dressed then we can head out." With that he turned his back to me and reached into his suitcase for some clothes giving me a perfect view of his ass, the towel ridding up a little as he bent over so I could see more of his thigh. I gulped and turned the other way. I dont know if I can handle getting breakfast with him while resisting the urge to jump him.

Kellins pov:
I grabbed my clothes and headed into the bathroom to get dressed. My heart was racing, I swear Vic was staring at my chest earlier. "You wish" the voice in my head scolded, "he was probably just zoning out again, he does it all the time. He wouldnt want you he's not even gay!" Once I had calmed down I got dressed and ran my fingers through my hair that was standing up in every direction possible, I then took a deep breath and stepped out back into the bedroom.
Vic was in the kitchen on his phone, I didnt know who with. I was about to make myself known when I heard my name and I froze in the doorway. Vic had his back to me and was trying to whisper into the phone.

"No I havnt told him yet!" he whispered angrily. The person on the other end of the phone responded and Vic whispered back in a sarcastic voice " Yeah, im just goona walk up to him and go 'Hey kellin, did I mention I love you! Oh and those skinny jeans show off your perfectly sculpted ass!'"

Kellin stared at Vics back wide eyed. Had I heard him right. I looked down at my legs, I was wearing my extra tight skinny jeans today and I suddenly felt self concious. 'I love you'. Vics words rang through my head. I couldnt believe it, was I still dreaming. I pinched myself just in case but I didnt wake up. I was suddely aware of how quiet it was and looked up to see Vic staring at me, mouth open and eyes wide. Shit, he'd seen me eavesdropping. The person on the other end of the phone was still talking but Vic just switched it off. I didnt know what to do so I spun round into the bathroom and slammed the door locking it, fully aware that I was blushing. I heard footsteps then a small knock on the door.
"Kellin..." I heard Vic whisper, barely audible. He sounded so lost and broken and it hurt so bad. I kept my mouth shut, knowing that if I said anything it would come out as "iojkfekljrgnjkr".

Vics pov:
I was on the phone to Mike, he was calling to ask if i'd told Kellin how I felt yet. He'd found out last week when he'd caught me staring at kellins ass. Kellin was getting dressed next door so I thought it was safe to talk to Mike but I kept my voice down just in case. "Yeah, im just gonna walk up to him and go 'Hey kellin, did I mention I love you! oh and those skinny jeans show off your perfectly sculpted ass!'" I whispered angrily, why couldnt he see it wasnt that easy. Kellin was my best friend and I knew he would hate me if he found out.

"you cant just hide it forever, he's gonna find out eventually" Mike replied. I thought back to this morning and how kellin caught me staring at his chest. It was getting worse. I sighed and turned around when I saw kellin in the open bathroom doorway staring at the ground. My jaw dropped, eyes wide. Had kellin just heard what i said?! kellin looked up at me and I knew he had from the look on his face. He looked mortified. I turned off my phone and Kellin spun round and locked the bathroom door.

No. No. NO!. I stared at the door for a couple of secends trying to take in what had just happened. I gulped and walked to the bathroom door and knocked hesitantly. When he didnt answer I sighed and slid down the door, resting my head back against the door and closed my eyes. What do I do now? Hes never going to forgive me. Hes going to hate me forever and leave me just like everyone else did. A single tear rolled down my cheek and onto my chin.

"Kellin..." i whispered hesitantly, my voice rough.
Silence.
"Kellin please.." I whispered again "Im sorry"
I heard kellin shuffle for a moment.
"Vic"
Silence.
"Is it true.."

I took a deep breath steadying myself, I might as well tell him now as already knew.
"I love you" I whispered, another tear trickling down my face. Then another. I gapsed to try and hold the tears back. "Im sorry, but I love you. I understand if you hate me now. I hate me too. But its true. Your my bestfriend but last week when we were at that diner with the others and that waitress was hitting on you I felt so jealous, you laughed and I wanted to be the only one to ever make you laugh like that, and thats when i realised I love you. And i'm so so sorry but I cant help it-" a sob rippled through my throat and then I couldnt stop crying, I just couldnt handle it. He was going to leave me and then I was going to be alone and I just couldnt cope with being alone again.

"Vic please stop" I heard Kellin say, the hurt obvious in his voice. But I couldnt, I just cryed harder.Then the door opened, I fell back and Kellin wrapped me in his arms, my head against his chest as he stroke my hair. I curled into him seeking the comfort I desperatly craved.
"I love you" kellin breathed, but I heard it, or was I just imaging it.
I love you so so much" I heard again. No, he definatly said it this time. I stopped crying and twisted around so I was facing him.
"What?" I said just in case I was going mad.
"I love you" Kellin said, this time looking me right in the eye.
Before I could respond Kellins lips were on mine.

Kelins pov:
I kissed him, I didnt even know what I was doing I just had to make him stop crying. It hurt so much seeing him like this, knowing it was all my fault. It wasnt hot and passionate it was just soft and loving. I pulled away and rested my forehead on his and stayed like that for a few seconds, eyes closed, just breathing in the moment.

My eyes fluttered open and I saw vic looking right at me and our eyes locked. His eyes were breath taking, the deep brown was vibrant yet sad with little specks of gold I never noticed before, telling so many stories, like a gateway to his thoughts. He looked so alone and scared.
"I will never leave you" I whispered, "I love you"

Vics pov:
The kiss was sweet, the feel of his soft lips on mine felt so good. I felt so releaved, like the heavy weight on my shoulders had finally been lifted. He pulled away and I opened my eyes, our forehead together. He looked so beautiful. His eyes opened and I was awestruck at how beautiful his deep blue eyes were, they looked like the ocean with a thousand shades of blue piercing and bright. They were even more beautiful up close and I couldnt tear my eyes away.
"I will never leave you" Kellin whispered as if answering my thoughts "I love you" Kellin breathed. I knew then that I would never be alone.