Guilty Pleasures

Chrystopher Corbin-Townsend, or Kit for short, slammed his apartment door after Richard left and locked it, then wrapped his arms around his lean waist. He went to the window where he stood staring out the window at the foliage in Central Park. The view of the pond, trees and the bridge would normally be phenomenal, but not after his and Richard's recent fight. The scent of red roses was heavy in the air. The ones he received as an apology from Richard. Kit had been surprised; he'd never gotten flowers from a male before.

He leaned his forehead against the cool glass, breathing onto it and used his finger to draw in the condensation. The light drizzle rolled down his window lazily. The overcast sky matched his mood. All because Richard had told him before he left that he might see him later and an argument ensued.

The problem wasn't that Richard didn't fight back, it wasn't that he had to work, it was because Kit had plans tonight for them. He was going to make it special to show his appreciation of the roses, but now all it was ruined. He may as well put the steaks in the freezer and eat the small red velvet cake hidden in the back of the refrigerator.

Kit lifted the cake from the box it was nestled in. Sighing in despair, he cut a good portion of it and set it on a plate, which he took to the living room where his and Richard's fight still loomed in the air like a cloud casting gloom on him.

He cut into the cake and almost got the fork to his mouth when his cell phone rang. He debated not answering it, believing it was Richard calling, but when he took his phone off the mahogany coffee table, he saw it was his ex-boyfriend, Dirk. What the hell did he want?

"Hey Dirk, how are you?" Kit set the cake down and eyed it from where he was, then decided he needed a taste. He used his finger to swipe up a glob of cream cheese frosting and sucked it off his finger.

"Pretty good. Did you see my debut video?" Dirk asked with an unmistakable high amount of energy and excitement in his voice. Kit could picture him hyped up and giddy. One reason they broke up was that Dirk had dreams of making it big in porn and wanted Kit to join him. Kit's answer was an emphatic no. The more important reason was that Kit fell out of love with him.

"No. I haven't." Kit's eyes rolled back before he closed them. Why would he want to see his ex-boyfriend fucking some other guy or guys.

"You should! I can send you a copy. You can still change your mind about coming out here to be in one with me. They're hiring all the time. They love young guys like us."

"I have a job that involves me keeping my dick in my pants, thank you very much." Kit rubbed his eyes with his fingers before he opened them. Everything was blurry until he blinked the fuzziness away.

"Keep me in mind and don't rule it out yet. It's a hell of a time. You'd love it."

"I don't fuck strangers, Dirk. Is this why you've called? I have better things to do." He looked around the room. No, he didn't have anything to do today. He'd sit at home and brood about Richard.

"Chill out, baby. I'm coming to Manhattan and I'd like to collect some of my things and maybe have a visit with you."

"What things, Dirk? I packed all your stuff and sent it to you. I also paid you half for the bed and living room set. There's nothing here of yours." Kit got up and walked around, searching. There were bare spots on the wall where Dirks pictures had been. He'd sent them too. In the bedroom, he searched drawers for clothing or toys. There was no sign that Dirk had ever had clothes in the mahogany dresser.

"I've finally had time to unpack what you sent and I can't seem to find my white hoodie. I know you had a thing for it. Maybe it's hiding in the back of the closet?"

It was true. Kit loved the fuzzy hoodie with the rainbow colored words 'hot mess' written on the front. He'd gotten a flurry of compliments on it from males and females his age.

"I'll check. Hold on."

He went to the closet and pulled open the bi-folding doors, sifting through his extensive amount of clothing he'd gotten free from Fusion as gratitude for signing on with them. He happened upon the coveted hoodie. He hadn't intentionally hid it or kept it from Dirk. Still, he took it off the hanger to bring the fabric to his nose. The scent of Dirk's body and the salty, ocean air brought back memories from the two-week cruise on the Sapphire Princess where he met Richard.

"Did you find it?" Dirk asked in Kit's ear and broke him out of his deep thoughts.

"Yes I did. I have it right here." Kit tossed the hoodie on the bed. It landed on top of a mass of blankets. He should've made his bed this morning.

"Great. So are you free this weekend?"

"This weekend? As in ... tomorrow... Friday night?"

"Yeah, my flight leaves in in the morning. I'll get to your place at one. We can do dinner."

Since he'd told Richard to leave and not come back, his reply was easy. "Sure. I'll make us some steak and potatoes."

"Now that sounds really good. I'd love to eat your meat." Dirk chuckled in Kit's ear. "The reason I ask is because I haven't been paid for the video yet. Something's tied up somewhere. I thought I could stay with you, if you don't mind. Hell, I'm really looking forward to being in bed with you again. We had such passionate sex."

"I'm not having sex with you, Dirk."

"Why? Do you have a boyfriend?"

Richard wasn't technically his boyfriend. They were dating, and after his outburst this morning, he wasn't even sure of that. "No, I don't have a boyfriend, but I'm dating. You're free to crash on the couch. How long are you staying?"

"I have to meet some people and coordinate some appointments..." He paused. "Monday or Tuesday I guess."

Four days. Four long days and nights with Dirk back at their apartment in Manhattan. "Do you have a boyfriend?" Kit asked.

"Me? No. I'm not over you yet. Remember all the good times we had? We can have that again."

Kit rolled his head back and around. "No, I'm not going to date someone in porn. It's like... unethical or something." He shuddered. He would never share a boyfriend with another man. "I don't play well with others, you know that."

"I wish you'd give us another shot."

"If you're gonna try to convince me, you have to know that I am not budging." Despite himself, he smiled.

"We'll see once I get there. I'm irresistible and I won't take no for an answer. I can't wait to see you again."

"You'll only see me clothed." Kit chuckled.

"Again, I can be persuasive. Anyway, I haven't called much, but I have missed you."

"I miss you too." Kit stated honestly. He had a blast with Dirk while they dated each other— modeling underwear together in photo shoots and traveling.

"Are you all right? You sound sad."

Kit was thinking about Richard. He'd grown to feel guilty about the way he treated him earlier and wanted to make up with him. However, he worried about how Richard would react to the temporary roommate situation with Dirk.

"I'm fine." Kit perked up. "Want me to pick you up at the airport?"

"No, I'll get a cab. It's easier than you having to go through all that stressful traffic. Man, you hated that. Cursed every time we had to sit for more than two minutes." Dirk laughed.

That was true. The traffic could be hell. Sitting in a car in the city with exhaust fumes made one lightheaded to the point of hallucinating.

"Good, then I'll expect you at tomorrow and we can talk."

"Okay, and thanks, Kit. You're pretty wonderful."

Kit's cheeks tinged a lovely shade of pink. He didn't feel wonderful at the moment, he felt gutted over Richard. "Thanks, but it's no big deal. See you, bye."