If Only Until Morning

I knocked firmly on the door of the bus and crossed my arms, trying to be patient. I probably could have just walked in, but considering the people on this tour, I decided that might be a bad idea for the sake of my sanity.

Not to mention my overactive imagination.

The door swung open and I gave a brief smile. "I don't care how bad your bus smells or how messy it is," I stated. "Can I hang out and possibly crash on your couch?"

William laughedthat wonderful, delicious laugh of his and stepped back. "Sure thing, Pen," he said, allowing me to follow him in. "Out of curiosity, what's wrong with your own bus?"

I sat down next to Michael, playing guitar, and crossed my legs at the knee. "My bus has my band in it," I replied simply, glancing at the vibrating strings.

Bill adopted a bemused expression as he sat across from me and kicked his feet up. "Generally, tour busses do that. Why's this a bad thing?"

The door to the back rooms opened and a head of bright orange hair appeared. Hayley grinned. "Hey, Ange." She came and sat between Josh and Jeremy, whom I'd somehow failed to notice on walking in.

"Joining us in invading TAI's bus, I see," Jeremy said, looking very comfortable in the corner.

Before I even finished shrugging, Hayley bounced in her seat and babbled, "So I saw you and a certain someone were getting cosy out by the tables." Her grin could beam through the fog back home and evaporate it in an instant.

Zac looked up. "What? Who?"

I shook my head at Hayley, silently saying, Don't tell him. "Oh, so you guys made up?" Bill asked. Oh yes, let's discuss my love life with everyone, shall we?

However, even with my mental sarcasm, I couldn't help but roll my eyes and spout off, "You obviously missed the part where he freaked out because I was wearing another guy's hoodie."

The Butcher, sitting at the table drawing, looked over. "Whose was it?" he asked.

"Barakat's." Looks of understanding dawned on several faces. "Completely innocent. I borrowed it to stand in for a set without him recognising me. Apparently realising your girlfriend smells like a guy translates somewhere in the brain to support the idea that she's cheating on you." I stopped, as it occurred to me I was doing exactly what didn't want to be doing. "Why am I still talking about this? I came to escape drama, not analyse it."

"Wait," Josh insisted, a calculating look on his face, "Who're you dating?"

"No one important," I assured him innocently.

"Ryan Ross," Hayley supplied in a helpful whisper, for his ears only.

"Hayley!" I protested.

"What?" Zac demanded. "Who? What'd she say?!"

I let my head roll back against the window and winced when it connected with the glass much harder than I expected it to. Only it didn't hurt for a good three seconds. "Ow," I declared, keeping my eyes shut. Everyone else laughed.

Well, if I'm good for nothing else, I can make people laugh.

Someone patted me gently on the head and when I opened my eyes, I discovered that it was the one and only William Beckett, smiling at me. Jesus, can you imagine if there were two of him? Or more? I think I might have to... do something drastic about that. One was more than enough on tour.

"Poor pri--"

"Don't you dare, William Eugene," I warned. He straightened up quickly, more surprised than offended. Or at least that's what I hoped.

Hayley, though, found it amusing. "You totally lost the middle name game, Bill," she laughed.

He shot her a mock-glare and tugged me up. "For that, Miss Williams, I am depriving you of your fellow redhead's company."

"Don't I get a say in this?"

"Hell no, you used my middle name." To the laughter of our companions, I was dragged back into the murky depths that were The Academy Is's tour bus. William stopped next to a bunk and shoved a curtain open. "After you," he said with a gesture. I raised an eyebrow at him. "We're going to have a little chat."

I stared at him for another second or three. "Bill, I too sleep on one of these buses, in one of these bunks. I know how uncomfortable two people in one bunk is."

He smiled that insinuating smile. Rolling my eyes, I continued and pulled him along further into the bus. "I make it a point to nap with my manager, who is incredibly good to cuddle. I have no idea what you where thinking."

I flopped down on the small couch in the small, dim room in the very back. "You know, you never answered my question," William said, sitting next to me.

"I'm quite aware, thank you." Avoid and conquer, ladies. But, damn, it's hard to avoid when those eyes are staring out of that face. And no, that's not being unfaithful. Window-shopping is not infidelity. Now, pushing him onto the couch and having my way with him, that's another story.

...I'm losing my train of thought in soliloquy.

And I lost myself even further when I discovered how very warm and comfortable William's shoulder was. His doing, not mine. "Want to tell me?" he asked with a smile.

I burrowed my cheek into his shoulder and muttered, "I avoided all questions. Which one are you talking about?"

"Why are you ditching your band?"

"I thought you didn't want to get involved in drama. By the way, if I doze off while you're talking, don't take it personally. You're just really comfy."

He laughed and slung an arm around me. "Well, I could say the same about you." I was thinking about fluffy things, like Ryan's bed (probably the most comfortable I've ever slept in), so I didn't hear a word. "Angie, you haven't been sleeping, have you?"

"I sleep all the time," I yawned, eyes shut.

"Now on my shoulder doesn't count, and I know you're making up naps with Aero because you told me before you can't stand napping and wasting the day." I harrumphed as best I could without actually having to move. "Before you pass out, why are you avoiding your band?"

"If I tell you, will you shut up and let me sleep?" I counter-questioned. William chuckled, which I took as a yes. I took a deep breath.

"Ryan gets mad that I'm wearing Jack's sweatshirt, we get into another fight, I get into a bad mood and snap at Ali because she says something of her usual bitchery and I have zero tolerance when I'm ticked off, Matt hears and gets mad, we have a fight, the guys take his side-- mostly because Alison turned on the water-works-- and I tranship to your bus because if anything it's quieter than it is over there, can I go to bed now?"

He paused. "Pen, it's four in the afternoon."

"Bill, I'm running on five hours sleep and too many cans and cups of caffeine to count in the past three days."

Another pause. "How are you awake now?" he asked incredulously. I mumbled incoherently, and he chuckled again. But he stopped. "Wait, that's story takes a lot less time than you showing up here a few minutes ago."

I inwardly cringed, as I'd been hoping to leave that section out. "Well, I might've made a stop along the way," I muttered, accidentally chewing a little on his shirt.

"To where?" William asked, trying to sound casual. I really didn't want to answer that, so I didn't. "Angie?" I babbled sleepily and felt another wave of exhaustion slide over me.

Flight R17 to Oblivion, long overdue.

Still somehow half-aware of my surroundings, I felt Bill kiss me on the head and ease me down on the couch. Though that might've been a dream, rather than a hallucination.

The good thing about having a major lack of sleep-- probably the only one-- is that when you actually do sleep, you're usually out like a light until you're reenergised and even the most overactive of imaginations shuts off.

I've always been told I'm unusual, though. Not that I didn't get the sleep I needed, and for the most part my mind didn't keep me alert with bizarre dreams.

Nope, it just reiterated the day's events: the look in Ryan's eyes before he stalked off to his bus, the delicate sneer on Ali's face as Matt's voice rang out from the next room, the vehemence in his voice as he yelled for minutes straight... the worry Shawn tried to disguise. Amplified by bias, it made me want to curl up and wither away.

People were moving around, that much I could tell as I slipped back into reality. Stupid people, always moving and waking me up. Too bad the bus wasn't moving too; otherwise it would have lulled me to sleep again.

"Angie," a silly voice sing-songed.

I opened one eye, but couldn't really distinguish much. "Yeeeeeeess?" I drawled.

"Wow," another voice laughed. "Her voice is deeper than yours, Butcher."

"Har har, Mike."

I turned over onto my back and stretched, straightening my spine with my arms overhead. Someone whistled and I flopped back onto the couch, rubbing my eye. "What time is it?"

"Almost ten," William informed me, very close to my head. "Your band is looking for you."

I curled up tighter, sinking into the blanket that had been thrown over me. "They can keep looking," I muttered.

"No need." I groaned, pulling the blanket over my head. "Well, at least we know you can sleep still," Matt remarked, voice getting closer. "Thanks for the tip-off, Bill." Then I got scooped up, blanket and all.

I rolled my eyes, head still covered. "You traitor, Beckett," I accused as I felt myself being kidnapped.

"It's for your own good."

"My ass."

"Is sexy," Matt finished, jostling me in his arms. "And is also going back onto the bus to get ready."

I yawned. "Can't. Stealing blankets from The Academy Is is a federal tour offence. They'll have the security fangirls on me in a second." Someone ripped the blanket away, and I shivered closer to Matt, who thankfully was warm.

"Security fangirls, eh?" I heard Michael muse as we left. "Sounds like an int'resting idea."

"You need to stop doing this," Matt said as we-- er, he-- walked towards the bus. "You can't just hop on another bus and not tell us where you are."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "Did you think of calling me?" I asked pointedly.

He rolled his eyes, but noticeably avoided looking at me. "Like you would've picked up."

"Let me guess; you called Shawn first, then Hayley, then probably Pete, and finally Bill."

"Carden, actually," he corrected with a smirk, opening the door with one foot.

I rolled my eyes. "Same difference."

I hopped out of his arms, swaying for a moment on the landing. A hand appeared on my hip. "You okay?" Matt asked worriedly. "Maybe you should sit down. I'll get you some water."

"I'm fine," I insisted. "I just woke up and my legs haven't been in use for about eighteen hours." He frowned, and for a minute he looked like the (sort of) naive kid I'd met two years before. Big green eyes, pretending to be older and wiser than they showed. I smiled and ruffled his hair. "I'm not okay, Mattie, I promise."

His face softened into a lopsided grin. "Serious nostalgia there." He followed me into the bunkroom and sat on Jesse's bunk as I pulled out some stage clothes. "I'm, uh, sorry about yesterday." My eyes darted up from the shirt in my hands; he was staring at his shoes. "I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. I know it r--"

"Bridge under the water," I interrupted steadily, tugging off yesterday's t-shirt and buttoning up the new one. "Just needed a little cooling-off period. Can't have everyone in a bad mood for laundry day, can we?"

Of course, I'd meant it ironically, but Matt's grin got wider and a glint appeared in his eye. "That would be awful," he said, heading for the door.

"Oh." I looked over my shoulder, sliding my belt through the loops. "And thanks for the peepshow." A pillow hit him in the back as he ran out, laughing.