I'm Just Fine

*fade in last participant, crowd gasps*
Rose: Please say your name and what year you are.
?: My name is Flynn Tempest and I am a senior.
Rose: Good afternoon Flynn. What have you been diagnosed with?
Flynn: I am a certified mild delusional schizophrenic. Try saying that five times fast.
Rose: *light giggle, Flynn smiles* How long have you been diagnosed with schizophrenia?
Flynn: It was the summer of freshman year of high school sooo... about seven years ago.
Rose: What treatment plan do you have set up with your doctor?
Flynn: *lets out a sigh* At the moment, I meet with my psychologist once a week and don't eat or drink anything that can alter my state of mind.
Rose: That doesn't seem like a lot for someone with your disorder.
Flynn: *bites lip* I'm a bit of a special case. Usually people with schizophrenia have a more intensive treatment and management.
Rose: Why don't you?
Flynn: I’ll get into that.
Rose: *nods* Then to continue on, can you give us a brief history before you were diagnosed?
Flynn: I can. *grin* So like most, my condition was preexisting prior to being diagnosed except I am a bit different because most cases do not... start until a person is about late teens yearly twenties. Sorry students watching this. Anyway, I've had my delusions since I was probably... three or four except they weren't called delusions back then. They started off as my imaginary friends and like most they had names: Trinity, Rico, and Scorch. They also had their own personalities so as I grew older it took me a while to realize they weren't real. I was shy when I was younger and had only one friend, excluding my three imaginary ones, who didn't seem to care that I was a bit odd. I think it comes with being an artist but whatever. I went through grade school like anyone else except with the added perk of have my imaginary friends never going away. It became difficult from there. My parents urged me to put that part of my childhood behind me, but I was confused because I never 'saw’ them as imaginary. Then once day when I was being bullies I realized that maybe they were right, maybe my friends were all in my head. My um, real friend? *shrug* my real friend saved me like he always did and then confirmed it. My reality started crashing around me and although I stopped reacting to Trinity, Rico, and Scorch’s presence, they never went away. I would get angry and frustrated because I realized that what was happening wasn't normal but I didn't want to get rid of them either. They weren't causing me harm; they actually made me more social. Trinity would urge me to take risks like make friends, volunteer for jobs, or interact with others, while Rico was more the voice of reason. He made sure I didn't do anything too stupid or dangerous.
Rose: What about Scorch I think its name was?
Flynn: She was mostly there for comfort. *Rose nods* I was pretty good at hiding the fact that I still had them around, but the summer of my freshman year my parents saw me interact with them and I was taken for tests. I was pulled from the public high school and signed up for a boarding school.
Rose: What has it been like living with schizophrenia since being diagnosed?
Flynn: *snort* Perhaps tougher and yet easier. Once being diagnosed I was put on antipsychotics to stop my delusions. The meds worked brilliantly. One day I had three imaginary friends following me around like always, the next they were gone. It was just me and the real world around me... or as real as it could get. I should have rejoiced but instead I didn't care. My freshman year of high school I lived in a world of greys, blacks, and whites. I no longer drew which was a hobby I was passionate about and considering a career path. Nothing bothered me, but nothing made me burn with passion. Kids bullied me and then gave up because I was no fun. I would stare at my canvas for hours without moving. I hardly remember anything from that year. It was so depressing that my parents even noticed and talked to my doctor about changing my meds. Over the course of a few months I changed it twice to the point where I could actually think for myself for a few hours a day.
For anyone watching this interview DO NOT do what I did, it's actually incredibly stupid and you should always talk to your doctor! Okay with that said and I'm being serious about the disclaimer, I started weaning myself off the medication until it was completely out of my system. I was able to think straight for the first time in over a year. However, my 'delusions' came back but I personally was okay with that and so were my friends that I eventually made and still have. High school was three years of learning to live with my schizophrenia. I learned to control my urges to talk to my imaginary friends, I learned to not try to touch them even though I couldn't feel them, and that anything that could alter my state of reality cause my delusions to be worse.
Rose: Can you give us an example?
Flynn: alright, I got drunk once and ended up having a panic attack because I was suddenly in the room with people, my three imaginary friends, and about seven faceless beings. It freaked me out and still does. I don't drink even though I am legally allowed to; I'd rather make sure my friends are okay.
Rose: Understandable, how has it effected your college years?
Flynn: I guess it's a little hard because I am no longer surrounded by a school that knows I have a disorder. I don't exactly see myself as different, but at the same time it's like being an actor. I am pretending to be normal even though I am not textbook definition of normal. But coming to this school has also lead me down a career path. Before I was thinking about being an artist, but with the guidance of some awesome teachers I have decided to become a psychologist for teens with mental and emotional disorders. I want them to know that it's okay because I know better than almost anyone. I still have my imaginary friends from when I was three and they aren't going away anytime soon.
Rose: So they are here with us now?
Flynn: Yes and hardcore judging me. *chuckle*
Rose: Doesn't it get... weird to have them constantly with you?
Flynn: Not really, as I’ve said they've been with my almost all of my life. It only gets uncomfortable when I’m trying to be... intimate with someone. There are times I want to be alone but can't. I've learned to live with it as part of my reality.
Rose: And who knows that you have mild delusional schizophrenia?
Flynn: My awesome parents (love them to pieces), a few of my teachers, the school, my high school, psychologist, my boyfriend, and my close group of friends.
Rose: Any last words you'd like to say?
Flynn: We are the same people we were before, only now you know us a little better.
Rose: Thank you Flynn.
Flynn: Thank you, Rose. *Fade out with Flynn silently laughing*
*fade in picture of each person throughout the years and some of Flynn's drawing of Trinity, Rico, and Scorch one by one only to be placed in the background, voice over*
Rose: Why do you find it hard to tell people of your disorders? One word to a short sentence, please.
Marty: Whispers behind my back *words bolded, fade to background*
Sam: Looks of annoyance. *words bolded, fade to background*
Nymph: Not their business. *words bolded, fade to background*
Trina: Embarrassment. *words bolded, fade to background*
Malia: Judgment. *words bolded, fade to background*
Brenden: Ashamed. *words bolded, fade to background*
Flynn: Fear. *words bolded, fade to background*
*Last picture sets in background, camera pans out. Picture of the group smiling on someone's couch, above reads this quote*

*fade out to black*

The movie ended and Flynn stepped back into the middle of the stage. His hands slightly shook as his imaginary friends encouraged him on. With a clear voice Flynn finished the presentation, “Living with a disorder is hard and sometimes cruel. People stare at you as if you are no longer human sometimes and no one wants to see or feel that. We are all human beings, just with some added quirks. As a brilliant role model once said, Normal is just an illusion. What is normal to the spider is chaos to the fly. No one wants to be out casted, but we aren't necessarily suffering either. Some of the most brilliant and life saving discoveries have come from those who are slightly different. Thank you for coming and attending this presentation. It would not have been possible without the school board, my advisor Dr. Lanz, Rose's advisor Mr. Godfrey, the psychology department, filming department, the president, my wonderful participants, and all of you. Thank you." He turned off the mic and turned to go. A step later there was clapping and cheers. Flynn looked over at Rose surprised.
At the little meet and greet afterwards, his friends all but swarmed him. Nymph was the first to pounce and nearly smothered him with love. Next was Malia who gave him a give, Trina slapped him on the back and then pulled him into a hug, Marty punched him in the arm and then congratulated him, Lydia smiled and hugged him, and last was Tyr whom kissed and hugged him.
"Do you think I'll get points off for using my friends?" Flynn wondered out loud.
"I hope not. You've worked hard to find six people willing to talk about themselves." Flynn's mother walked up and kissed him on the cheek. "You did an awesome job. I'm proud of you Flynn." His father congratulated him too before they excused themselves to talk to Rose.
Flynn ended up talking to a few attendees until near the end of the greet. Once the last person left he spotted another small group of people. "Oh god, your parents came?!" Flynn gave a harsh panicking whisper.
Tyr turned to see his parents and siblings heading towards them. "Yeah, they heard me talking about your thesis project and decided to come."
"You didn't tell me!? I can't do this."
"What's the big deal? They're only my parents and they like you."
"Yeah, that was before they found out their son is dating a delusional schizophrenic!"
"Didn't you learn anything about your own film? It's okay to be different."
"I am aware of that. I was also the one you said FEAR was a reason I didn't tell people."
"Flynn, just relax. Remember I'm here for you."
"Fine but if you leave for any reason I will flush the toilet when you're showering."
"I cringe in fear." Tyr chuckled before smiling and greeting his parents. "Hey mom, dad, Ryan, Connor, Teresa, glad you could make it."
It was awkwardly quiet as the small group stared at each other. Mrs. Morganson was the first to break the silence. "Well, I guess it makes sense why you suddenly disappeared. I'm sorry I have been so hard on you." The rest of the time together passed a little awkwardly but overall not bad.
That night Tyr crawled into bed and stared at his boyfriend who was deep in thought as he changed. "What's on your mind, Flynn?"
"People know my secret now. I mean people I don't even know. I'm kinda freaked out now. I knew that once I agreed to be part of the film things would change but now I’m scared." Flynn turned to look at Tyr, playing with his tie nervously.
"It's probably going to be a little hard and uncomfortable at first, but it'll be fine. You have all your friends who are also going to go through this stage of transition, we'll be graduating soon and not have to worry about these students, and most of all," Tyr grinned as he sat up and pulled Flynn closer by his tie. "You got me." And then proceeded to kiss him deeply.
Flynn moaned into the kiss. "You're going to dirty my only nice shirt."
"We have a washing machine for a reason." He pulled Flynn down and rolled them so Tyr was on top.
"We still...Tyr *moan*... don't know... shit... if ties can be washed."
With a gleam in his eyes, Tyr replied, "I'll buy you a new one."
"That'll be the third one this year!" Flynn laughed before helping Tyr rid them both of their clothes except the tie. Flynn's life wasn't perfect, but he was happy with it.