Why to Be Afraid of Tomorrow
Part 4
I'm sitting in the school yard and drawing, again. I usually sit here with Daniel but today he’s not at school, unfortunately. “Hey, Pierre!” I heard a nice greeting from far away. I looked up and glimpsed approaching David. Oh, damn, don’t be nervous, don’t be nervous, I thought. I smiled to cover up my nervousness. “Hello.” He sat next to me. “You forgot your pencil box in the math classroom so I brought it to you.” He said while handing me the pencil case. “Aw, thank you, Davie. I wondered where it was. Thank you once more.” He giggled. “You’re welcome, Pierre.” His little eyes shone when the sun was shining onto his face. I was simpering all the time. “You’re drawing?” He asked happily. “Oh, yes but now I’m done, I'm completing the details only.” I responded. “Let me see.” He heeled over my shoulder. “Aw, that’s pretty good, really.” While he was talking he was really close to me. I watch his lips’ movements. “It’s incredibly beautiful.” He smiled and I was still watching him. Immediately he turned his face, so we were only a few inches from each other. “Thank you.” He gave me a big smile. I looked at him throughout. “What’s going on?” He asked smilingly. “Oh, I’m sorry.” Shit, I thought. I was embarrassed. Luckily, David didn’t care about it and he pulled away and again sat next to me. “Pierre, I would like to have a picture from you.” He smiled. “Oh, like really?” I tittered. “Yeah.” “So don’t move.” I said and sat down opposite him. Finally, I made a step at time. “Okay.” He smiled. I think he was surprised I wanted to draw him but fortunately he didn’t protest. “You can talk something during it.” He smiled again and talked all the time so I recognized he’s really talkative. Meanwhile, I learned a lot of interesting stories from his life. Luckily, we have the same sense of humor so we understand each other – truly, I didn’t expect it.
“Okay, here it is.” I handed him my drawing. His jaw dropped down. “It’s the most beautiful portrait I’ve ever seen. Pierre, I’m sure I’m gonna enframe it and hang it up above my bed.” We both smiled. “It's an honor for me. Thank you.” He giggled and gave the drawing into his bag. While doing that he told me: “Pierre, wouldn't you do something? Like to go for a walk or something like that, of course if you want. Just to not sit at home all the time.” Then he smiled widely. I was surprised that he wants to go somewhere with me. I giggled. “I would like to.” “Oh, really? It’d be great.” He tittered before continuing: “You won’t believe what I dreamed about.” I raised an eyebrow and he continued: “We were marines, and a relationship in the infantry was banned. So every night we went by stealth to the depository of parachutes and we were kissing all the time, underhand of course.” I swallowed thickly. “And after a while two men from the army saw us, so we ended up in the jail. That was the weirdest dream ever.” He laughed quietly. It took some time before I recuperated. “Oh, that’s pretty weird.” I wish it to happen. And then in the jail I would kiss him all along. I would like to spend the time in the prison by kissing him but he laughed that dream. It was on the wrong way. I looked down. “What happened?” David was wondering. “Nothing, nothing.” I smiled to cover my mental absence because I was daydreaming. When I looked at his perfect lips I yearned to kiss him but I was sure that I wouldn’t be able to do it. I shook myself to get back into the damned reality. “Okay, we have to go to French lesson.” I decided and got up. “Ok, let’s go.”
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The whole French lesson I was mentally absent because of David’s dream. Throughout I looked at him. A couple of times he noticed my observation so it was truly embarrassing. And our French teacher interrupted my deep thinking by a question ‘what is the capital of France?’ and I was so out of place that my answer was totally incorrect. So I earned the worst mark.
********
Ok, I have to start talking like first. I’m not a loser. I told to myself and bang on my chest before I approached from behind to David who was rummaging through the locker. “Davie?” I said quietly and he turned briskly. “Yeah? Do you need anything?” His smile made me crazy again. In that moment I realized I didn’t know why I went to him at all. What for? I had to quickly think of something. Come on, speak! I told inwardly. “I just…There is nicely outside, isn't it? The sun is shining, sky is cloudless.” Shit. Why I started talking about that kind of bullshit? Oh god. “Pierre, it’s raining.” I glanced out through the glass door. It was really embarrassing. “Yeah! You see? The sun gets on my brain.” Really, I didn’t know what I was talking. “Pierre, the sun is behind the cloud. It’s cloudy and rainy, are you okay?” He grinned and I was looking like an idiot. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what I’m saying.” I felt embarrassed. Suddenly I heard a husky voice from behind me. “So what fagot, you’re seducing?” My mortal enemy, Rick, pushed me forward so I fell onto David who was pushed on the lockers. Luckily, I stopped by my hands so I didn’t press him down. I ignored his insult and instead started to apologize to David. “Oh, I’m sorry, Davie, are you okay? Something happened to you?” I asked and worried but didn’t move from his body. It was beautiful feeling to feel his heart beating. “I’m alright, Pierre, there’s no need to apologize, it’s not your fault. It's cool.” He said and smiled weakly. I was looking into his deep hazel eyes and still, without a single movement. “Pierre?” Today already for the second time I was so close to his beautiful face. After a while I realized I’m probably too close. “I’m sorry, Davie. Don't you wanna accompany home?” “I would like to.” “Okay, let’s go.” We smiled.
“Okay, here it is.” I handed him my drawing. His jaw dropped down. “It’s the most beautiful portrait I’ve ever seen. Pierre, I’m sure I’m gonna enframe it and hang it up above my bed.” We both smiled. “It's an honor for me. Thank you.” He giggled and gave the drawing into his bag. While doing that he told me: “Pierre, wouldn't you do something? Like to go for a walk or something like that, of course if you want. Just to not sit at home all the time.” Then he smiled widely. I was surprised that he wants to go somewhere with me. I giggled. “I would like to.” “Oh, really? It’d be great.” He tittered before continuing: “You won’t believe what I dreamed about.” I raised an eyebrow and he continued: “We were marines, and a relationship in the infantry was banned. So every night we went by stealth to the depository of parachutes and we were kissing all the time, underhand of course.” I swallowed thickly. “And after a while two men from the army saw us, so we ended up in the jail. That was the weirdest dream ever.” He laughed quietly. It took some time before I recuperated. “Oh, that’s pretty weird.” I wish it to happen. And then in the jail I would kiss him all along. I would like to spend the time in the prison by kissing him but he laughed that dream. It was on the wrong way. I looked down. “What happened?” David was wondering. “Nothing, nothing.” I smiled to cover my mental absence because I was daydreaming. When I looked at his perfect lips I yearned to kiss him but I was sure that I wouldn’t be able to do it. I shook myself to get back into the damned reality. “Okay, we have to go to French lesson.” I decided and got up. “Ok, let’s go.”
********
The whole French lesson I was mentally absent because of David’s dream. Throughout I looked at him. A couple of times he noticed my observation so it was truly embarrassing. And our French teacher interrupted my deep thinking by a question ‘what is the capital of France?’ and I was so out of place that my answer was totally incorrect. So I earned the worst mark.
********
Ok, I have to start talking like first. I’m not a loser. I told to myself and bang on my chest before I approached from behind to David who was rummaging through the locker. “Davie?” I said quietly and he turned briskly. “Yeah? Do you need anything?” His smile made me crazy again. In that moment I realized I didn’t know why I went to him at all. What for? I had to quickly think of something. Come on, speak! I told inwardly. “I just…There is nicely outside, isn't it? The sun is shining, sky is cloudless.” Shit. Why I started talking about that kind of bullshit? Oh god. “Pierre, it’s raining.” I glanced out through the glass door. It was really embarrassing. “Yeah! You see? The sun gets on my brain.” Really, I didn’t know what I was talking. “Pierre, the sun is behind the cloud. It’s cloudy and rainy, are you okay?” He grinned and I was looking like an idiot. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what I’m saying.” I felt embarrassed. Suddenly I heard a husky voice from behind me. “So what fagot, you’re seducing?” My mortal enemy, Rick, pushed me forward so I fell onto David who was pushed on the lockers. Luckily, I stopped by my hands so I didn’t press him down. I ignored his insult and instead started to apologize to David. “Oh, I’m sorry, Davie, are you okay? Something happened to you?” I asked and worried but didn’t move from his body. It was beautiful feeling to feel his heart beating. “I’m alright, Pierre, there’s no need to apologize, it’s not your fault. It's cool.” He said and smiled weakly. I was looking into his deep hazel eyes and still, without a single movement. “Pierre?” Today already for the second time I was so close to his beautiful face. After a while I realized I’m probably too close. “I’m sorry, Davie. Don't you wanna accompany home?” “I would like to.” “Okay, let’s go.” We smiled.