Outcast

When the Healer entered the room, it was like a breath of warmth in the dead of winter. She seemed so full of life and sunshine, that I could not help but think of the heat of a summer day. She was Skilled, she Chose the correct Calling. I knew that I would always come to her with any problems. In her had she held a pink liquid in a clear glass. On her face was a slight smile, as if she knew why I had come but was not entitled to say. I never told her WHY I got the headache; just that I had it, but I know that she knew exactly how I had gotten them. She told me I could call her Olivia, and she handed me the drink. It was fruity and pleasant, reminding me of my mother – she always loved raspberries.
As I sipped the juice, my head cleared and a smile like the one on Olivia’s face started to spread across mine. How did she do that? How did she make feel instantly better? If I believed in such things, I would have said that the juice had magical properties. Sadly, there is no such thing; everything is all about science and technology in Society. Anyone who thinks that magic is an actual thing, they are immediately taken in to be questioned. Then, depending on the verdict, they are either Outcast or are put into a hospital for people who are too dangerous to be around others. I think the correct term is insane, but I’m not sure.
Anyway, I finished the glass of Healer’s Gift and was shown out of the Wing. Olivia told me that if I had any other problems to ask for her, she promised to personally take care of me. And I held her to that.
Now, I squeeze my eyes shut and count down from 10. 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, by 6 I start to breathe out, 5, 4, relax, 3, 2, deep breath, 1. I open my eyes and am a tiny bit better. I think I might actually be – slightly – prepared for the next Vision.
***
I try to get comfortable in the cold metal chair before I go under. The shivers start up again as I start to fade to black. They run up and down my spine, as if it were a track of the championship race. And, as my sight fades, my chip starts to burn red hot, as if a searing coal was placed there. It tells me that the beginning if the Vision will come soon.
***
I open my eyes in a dim room on a bed that is soft and white. I do not think I have ever had a bed like this. The normal ones in regular Society homes are stiff and cheap, made for quantity, not quality. This bed seems as if I am lying on a cloud – the sheets are smooth and the comforter thick and warm. Maybe cotton. I usually sleep with wool – very hot in the summer. I could stay here forever without being bored. I could dream forever. I remember that this is a Vision, I have to be on high alert – something is going to happen and I am going to have to either, destroy it, find it, or save it. The problem, I do not know what ‘it’ is. That is half of the entire Vision, to figure out the goal, other half is to carry it out.
Slowly, I sit up and take in the room. It is colorful, aqua blue walls, dark blue ceiling and white carpet. The theme seems to be water, the comforter, now that I have opened my eyes, has a wave design. I think if I ever get to see the ocean, it would look like this room – all wavy and blue. I reluctantly swing myself out of the bed and stretch, but only for a second, and then I quietly swing the door open.
Outside, the hallway walls are a plain off-white and the floors are a dark, polished wood. All along the two walls are doors; I bet they are living quarters similar to the one I woke up in. I take a tentative step forward, then another. What am I supposed to do? Where am I? What on earth is this place? I frowned. Usually I know what I have to do by now – it’s pretty obvious. It only takes me on average of 5 minutes to finish a Vision – maybe that is why I get the headaches – because I go so fast. I do not know what times my classmates get though, so I cannot compare myself to them. It is classified, what each student gets. Society doesn’t want discrimination between peers because of this. Ha. If only they knew.
I turn left and head down the white hallway. My feet – which I realize now, are bare – make a soft shushing sound against the smooth wood of the floor as I walk. The hallway seems to stretch on for an eternity and I wonder if my goal is to find its end. I honestly hope not. If it were, I would probably fail this particular Vision. What then, if I did? What happens to students who fail their Visions?
I sigh. Do not think of things like that Gwen. You had might as well give up if you think such things. A door opens about 100 feet away from where I stand, on the right. A boy in a red tunic – for that is what it is, a tunic, one of the ones from the Ancient Times – steps out from the doorway and heads towards me. His hair is black and full, slightly curly and falling slightly shorter than his shoulders. His face is chiseled and handsomely angular. As he gets closer, I feel like I know him, but I do not know any black-haired boys though, on closer inspection, he is too old to be called a boy. Only dirty blonde and dull brunette boys. He stops close enough so I can see his eyes – they are crimson red – Fangor’s eyes. Now I know who he is, how could have I been so unobservant? It is Fangor, but not as I remember him. He is older, more mature, maybe 20 years old.
“Fangor? Is that really you?” my voice is barely audible, disbelief fills what can be heard of it.
“Yes Gwendolyn, it is me. What are you doing here? I did not know you knew where I was?” His voice is skeptical as he arched a perfect black eyebrow.
“I do not know why I am here. I thought you were dead. Is this some sort of a joke?” It is just the Vision, not real, just Society trying to mess with me, to see how I will react. Stupid Society, knowing everything that makes my skin crawl. Making my brother, the only person I have ever truly trusted, my enemy. Just my luck. I am going to have to kill him or something.
“Why would this be a joke? And if it were, you know me well enough that I would not do such a thing like this to you. Especially since I know that it cut you deeply when I disappeared. I would not do that,” He has a point. As my elder brother, he is entitled to tease me, but he has never gone so far as to be mean. But, Fangor is DEAD. I saw Society Police take him away, telling my parents that he would be killed for what he did to Society.
“Gwen?” Fangor’s voice is soft with worry. “Gwen, are you alright? Please do not go into shock. It is just me. It is not a joke, I promise.” This is confusing, what am I supposed to do? Why is my brother in my Vision? Fangor slowly starts towards me, as if I am a scared animal he wants to tame. When he is close enough, he reaches out his hand and gently touches my face, as if to say that he is not a hallucination but flesh and blood. He gathers me into his warm embrace and holds me tight, just like he used to when we were little. I relax and let myself calm down, this is my safe haven, no one can get me here. Fangor is my brother, he will protect me if something were to go wrong. He smells of cinnamon toast and coffee, his favorite breakfast, his familiar scent. I breathe in deeply, never wanting this moment to end. Fangor is alive and he will take care of me like no one ever has. No one except him. Whenever I had a nightmare, it was he who would wake me and hold me until I fell back asleep. He who helped me up when I fell the first time I rode his old bike. My parents were always too busy to do anything with me. They always had some excuse – they had their Calling, or friends to entertain. Never did they ask how our days at Primary School were, who were our friends, how did we do on that test that day. No, they left us to our own devices mostly. Fangor was always on for cooking breakfast, I for lunch. And, when our parents were too busy even to share dinner with us, we would cook together and take it each others’ rooms where we would sit and talk about our days and wondering about things. We would just ask random questions – like what would it be like to run free in the Forest beyond the Electric Gates? What is it like to be married and have to raise a family, how would we do it? Just random kids questions, but it got Fangor thinking, which always gets me thinking.
As he pulls away now, I fell a sense of loss, what would it have been like if Society hadn’t taken Fangor away? He never believed in going to the Academies, he always said that they filled your head with fluff that is not useful. Then they go and send you off into your Calling, where you are stuck for the rest of your life. And, you never really get to choose where you go because of all that fluff in your head, it messes with your judgment.
“Hey, are you awake in there?” His voice pulls me back to the present again.
“Yeah, I am here.” Even to my own ears, I sound distracted. Why am I here? This is not your typical Vision. You usually were put into some mortal danger then left on your own to fight out of it. But Fangor is not dangerous – not to me – so why put him as the antagonist in this situation? Why put him as my enemy when he is the only friend I have ever had?
“You need to get out of here, as soon as you can. It is not safe for you here. Not yet.” His eyes are sad, as if he wishes very dearly that it was safe for me here. That he wishes I were older or more able to protect myself, then I would be safe here – wherever this is.
He hugs me again, this time harder, as if he were telling me goodbye and doesn’t want to – not at all. I sigh into his shoulder; I do not want to leave either. I want to stay – I am sure that if any danger DID come, he would protect me from it. He is my elder brother, I am his responsibility to take care of. And I tell him so.
“Fangor, you are my big brother, I know you will take care of me if anything were to happen. I know you will.” I crane my neck up to look at his face. The stubborn set in his jaw he got from father, the slight upturn of his nose that we both got from mother. We are so alike, he and I. Stubborn, reckless, impatient, and strong-willed, we are impossible to win a fight against. We both think we are right – and we will not step down. His eyes are filled with worry, he seems to know that this is not real – he is not real, not anymore. He just a figment of my imagination, he died. This is a Vision, they are made to mess with your emotions and make you unsure. This is all fake – none of it is the truth.
Fangor grunts, as if I punched him in the stomach and he starts to pull away. When I look up, he is gone and I am alone. But only for a second, then the world starts blur and fog up, disappearing. I blink and the hallway with my mystical, long dead, elder brother is gone.
***