Never Tear Us Apart

Helena lay in the darkness. Her eyes wide open as she stared at the ceiling, counting the crystals on the chandelier that hung over her bed, the young woman had no idea how long it had been since she had climbed into bed. She had tried to sleep but her mind was too busy whirring with thousands of thoughts. Mainly of the raven haired male that she had left in a fit of rage. Sighing she rolled over for the fiftieth time that night, as she lay on her side she closed her eyes and prayed that sleep would come.

BZZZZZ

Helena was ripped from her dozing state at the sound of her mobile vibrating harshly against the wooden top of her bedside table. Sitting up slightly she grabbed the device pulling it off the charger and looking at the caller ID. A photo of Zayn smiled before her face as his name flashed across the screen. Capturing her bottom lip between her teeth she answered the call.

“Hello?” her voice was slightly groggy from being silent for hours.

“Helena,” Zayn gushed, he was surprised that she was still awake let alone the fact that she had answered his call.

“Hi Zayn,” the brown haired girl whispered lying back looking up at the ceiling she had been studying moments ago. A silence settled between the two suffocating both of them. When Helena thought she was going to burst Zayn spoke.

“I’m sorry Lena,” he admitted, the brunette chewed her bottom lip closing her eyes letting his words wash over her. “I know I have probably overstepped the line… I know I scared you today. I was mad, drunk, hurt and confused,” the male’s tone wavered with emotion. The silence between the two returned and this time it was Helena who broke it.

“I shouldn’t have said what I said,” she said her tone still a whisper as she replayed the words she had hissed at Zayn earlier today. Helena had been tearing herself apart for letting slip the truth about why Perrie left her best friend.
There was a ruffling sound as Zayn moved around on his bed, she assumed, “Is it true?” he asked.

“Zayn-”

“Lena, you’re my best friend. Please. Tell me did I physically hurt her?” tears filled the brunette’s eyes as she bit her lip harshly; a metallic taste spread across her tongue alerting her to the fact that she had broken the skin. “Lena…” he tried again his tone strangled like he was trying desperately to hold back sobs.

“Once.”

“When?” his voice was almost non-existent. Tears spilled onto Helena’s cheeks inhaling deeply she decided to tell him what caused his fiancé to finally leave him.

“It was right near the end Zayn, it was the reason that she left you. At the start she understood your stress, she understood how you used alcohol to help you relax, when you dabbled in drugs she started to get a little worried. You remember that, she threatened to leave unless you cleaned yourself up,” she paused. “And you did… you were doing so well and everything was getting better, Perrie was happier and so where you. Then something went wrong, I can’t remember what it was, something with management. That night you went out and got plastered off your face… do you remember?”

“Yes… some of it.”

“That part you don’t remember, that was when you hurt her. I don’t know the specifics but I know you came home angry… someone had pissed you off at the bar. All I know is that Perrie had tried to calm you down and you weren’t having a piece of it… she must have pushed to far and that’s when you snapped. She came rushing to mine… God Zayn she was a mess. She couldn’t speak, all she could do was cry; she was hyperventilating so bad nothing coming out of her mouth made sense Zayn.”

A sob broke out and it wasn’t Helena, “You shook her up something bad that she spent that night in my bed with me. She didn’t want to be alone and she didn’t answer any of her calls afraid that it would be you. Afraid that you would yell at her, come after her. That night was the worst I had seen her, she was like a vulnerable child.” Helena paused hearing Zayn sniffle and sob on the other end of the line. “The next morning she knew that she couldn’t keep it up. She couldn’t bear to be treated like that again… After that night the love she had been holding onto for all those years was snuffed out and she knew that it wouldn’t come back.”

“Fuck!” Zayn cussed loudly his voice wobbled with his sadness, “I fuck up everything Lena, how can you still stand by my side knowing what I have done.”

“It is one of the hardest things I do, but I believe in you Zayn, I believe that you can get better, beat this demon and start a fresh chapter on your life. You just need to try harder, you need to believe in yourself and for god sake apologize to people. You have lost Perrie, you are losing the guys and your mother… you might even lose her Zayn.”

“And you, will I lose you?” he asked his voice was soft again, broken.

“No.” the world tumbled from the young woman’s’ automatically. Taking a deep breath she closed her eyes and listened as her friend tried to get a hold of himself but his emotions were running free. “Zayn… I’ll call you in the morning,” Helena was about to pull the device from her ears when his voice stopped.

“No… please,” there was urgency to his tone, “Please just stay on the line, I don’t care if you fall asleep.”

“Alright,” Helena said before rolling onto her side the mechanical device pressed against her ear.

“Where are you Lena?” he asked, “I drove past your parents house but you weren’t there.”

“I am at a friends house,” the line went quiet again except for the shaky breath that left Zayn’s lips.

The two stayed on the line till the early hours of the morning, every now and again talking but mainly laying in silence. Neither were sure which fell asleep first.