Saving Grace

They’re just a few thing that I need to get straight. I had no intentions on falling in love with Aspen on this trip, or ever for that matter. I did not agree to go on this trip knowing that I’d be with her, I was pretty much forced. Though with that being said even if I had known that she was going it wouldn’t have changed that I was still being forced to go on this trip nor would it have meant that I was trying to go behind my best mates back and steal his girl.

Aspen was a gorgeous girl. Don’t get me wrong I did think she was attractive. But I also knew that she was Zayn’s girlfriend which kind of made her off limits. And my intentions on this trip once I found out we were going on it together were pure. I just thought it would be nice for us to hang out and get to know one another better. I mean she was already always over at the flat I shared with the boys that or she was always around and surely it wasn’t a big deal if your girlfriend got on well with your best mates.

Sadly though I really underestimated how unpredictable love can be.

I didn’t fall in love with her right off the bat, I also didn’t tell her as soon as I knew I loved her either since things were well, they were complicated. I did however develop feelings for her over this trip. I guess you could say over this trip I developed a crush. A crush that with time and ironically enough the help of Zayn would blossom into something beautiful. And it all started on the plane ride.

Our parents had decided I guess that they thought it would be a nice idea for Aspen and myself to sit away from them. I don’t know why, to be honest I was still questioning why they even wanted Aspen and myself there when it was pretty damn clear that they were just going to ignore us the entire time, but I was going along with it. Wasn’t like I could really back out anyways now, we were already on the plane taking off. Anyways, our parents had sent us away and I found myself sitting on the plane in a row with just myself and Aspen.

She’d wanted to sit next to the window and I let her, I didn’t really care where I sat as long as it was somewhere and I wasn’t the one who ended up with that annoying kid behind me kicking my seat the whole time while their parents did nothing.

She’d reached out and grabbed my hand when the plane started to move and it was clear we were taking off. I was kind of confused, and when she saw that she laughed a little.

“Flying makes me nervous. I would hold my dad’s hand but he’s back there somewhere.”

She found comfort in just the simple gesture of holding someone’s hand when she was nervous. I’m sure there are tons of other people out there who are like that, they need something or someone to hold onto when they’re nervous, but I’d never really paid much attention to that small detail until now. I let her hold my hand, I let her squeeze it as we took off, and I let her find the comfort to not be so nervous in me since I was the one sitting with her.

Once we were up in the air she let my hand go.

“Well feel free to hold my hand whenever you need to.” I told her not wanting her to think that I wanted her to be nervous or anything like that. I wanted Aspen to feel comfortable.

Once we were up in the air and Aspen had calmed down we talked, and we talked about a lot of things.

“Wait you’re for real. You wanna play twenty questions? Liam that is so lame and overused.” She laughed, “but whatever, you start.”

“Well why are you going along with it if you think it’s lame and overused.” I laughed right back shaking my head in the process, though she did have a point. It was kind of lame and overused but I couldn’t really think of any other game we could play to pass time that would allow us to get to know one another so I went with it.

“Fine. Aspen since I brought it up I’ll start.” I licked over my lips wanting to think of a good question, even though the idea was kind of lame I didn’t want to make it worse by asking lame questions that wouldn’t tell me anything other than what her favorite color was and if she liked puppies. “Odd or even numbers?”

“What the hell kind of question is that?” She asked me shaking her head, “even. They have a crispness to them that I like, unless it’s a multiple of five. I really like the number fifteen for example. But like I get all weird when it comes to volume and will freak out if it isn’t on an even number volume wise. And by the way I thought you were going to ask a totally lame question and was slightly taken off guard.” She told me before she was leaning back in her seat staring at me.

“I thought it was a good question.” I told her lamely rubbing my neck before she was pushing on my shoulder, “and you had a really uh interesting answer.” I told her as I hadn’t really expected more than a word really.

“It was a weird first question I guess, doesn't mean it wasn't good. And I mean most people ask about colors and stuff and that’s kind of what I was expecting. And thank you, I think. Anyways, if there was a timer that told you when you’d meet your soulmate would you get it?”

“Okay now who’s asking weird first questions.” I replied with a laugh before leaning back into my own seat to think about it. “Maybe. I mean I think a part of me would want it just because it sounds compelling and then if my soulmate also had one I’d know the exact moment I was going to meet them and I wouldn’t be worried I’d never find love I guess. But at the same time having one would take all the spontaneity out of finding love, it would take everything out of it really because I’d know something I’m not sure I was supposed to know until it happened. Plus I mean what if I wasn’t going to meet my soulmate until I was like eighty or something. I’d know that when I was eighty I was going to meet my soulmate but I’d want to meet her before then and possibly even feel bad since I'd know I couldn't be with anyone because we wouldn't last. It'd kind of ruin things for me personally I think. And I’m not even going to get into how awful it would be if my soulmate didn’t even have a timer. So I think in the end I wouldn’t. I just wanna fall in love with someone without a timer telling me I’m in love with them.”

When I looked at her again after my drawn out answer she looked entranced, as if she’d been holding onto every word I said.

“That was beautiful.”

And all I could do was smile.

We played twenty questions for a while actually. And I don’t think we ever asked a lame question. Some of them weren’t as deep as others, they were just simple do you like this or that more, but some of them were deep like the timer one. And I actually feel like I learnt a lot more about her than I would’ve with the lame questions. Sure I couldn’t say I knew her favorite color yet but I feel like I knew her. I mean now I knew that she liked multiples of 5 and even numbers more than odd. I knew her parents named her Aspen after the ski resort we were going to stay at. Apparently it’s where they spent their honeymoon and they’d loved it so much there and thought Aspen was the cutest name and decided to name her after it. I found out she was supposed to have a brother but her mum miscarried and lost him. Her uncle used to sneak her candy when she wasn’t supposed to have it. She spent a lot of time with her uncle after her mum lost the baby. She told me about one of her ex boyfriends who’d blacked her eye and how she’d dumped him and broken his nose the same day, apparently her uncle thought it was important she know how to stand up for herself and not to ever let a man lay his hands on her in an abusive way.

All in all I learnt a lot about her during the ride. And the way she told her stories, how she sounded when she laughed at mine, everything about her really was enough to draw me in. And while she might’ve been entranced with my story about wanting to find love without a timer I was slowly becoming entranced with her all together.

I could see why Zayn, or anyone for that matter would want to be with her. I could tell why her uncle had called her the heartbreaker, and I could tell that she was the type of girl you wanted a future with. And it was just so sad that she’d end up broken. Because a girl like Aspen didn’t deserve to be broken, she deserved happiness.