Forgetting You, But Not the Time

"I heard there's a new kid," said Kris as the both of us made our way back to school together that following Monday, November 2nd. My weekend had been spent bickering with Reese, Tre calling every 52 minutes (yes, he was very precise) which annoyed Reese to death—that being the only reason I didn't tell Tre to stop—and Billie also calling me, impersonating different occupations every time I answered; I had gotten so tired of it at one point that I just stopped answering all this calls, despite his claims that he actually had something important to tell me.

"Oh really?" I asked, seeing the parking lot of Pinole Valley coming into sight. "I don't think we need anymore of those," I muttered. In the past 3 weeks, we had managed to hear about 16 new students, most of which were girls.

Kris nodded. "Mhm," we walked down the crosswalk and passed through the parking lot, pulling our jackets tighter against us, the weather becoming slightly more chilled. "But I think this one's a guy." she stated, walking towards the grassy hill towards our usual spot, me close behind her.

"Well that's a relief." And it was. Most of the newer girls had moved from places such as New York City, Tampa, Florida and even somewhere in Malibu or Beverly Hills. Not that I had any problems with Florida, I had actually always wanted to live there.

Kris agreed. "Oh, and I saw Billie this morning near the park by my house. Carly, Mike, Al and a few others were there, too. Carly stopped by, said he'd been apologizing to everyone for being a dickhead." I laughed at that, in which Kris grinned over at me.

"That's good news. Did she say anything about him apologizing to you?"

"Yeah, he said he was sorry. I'm not exactly one for holding grudges or anything, I mean we did end up fighting before it happened, so I can't exactly blame him." I nodded to myself. So it was true. Billie was actually telling the truth. Unable to stop myself, I smiled. I wasn't exactly sure why I was smiling, but I figured it had something to do with Billie. Of course, it always had something to do with Billie, so this wasn't much of a surprise. "How're you and Chase doing?"

I knew she was going to bring that up. Everyone has been. It's like they're expecting something to go wrong, or that someone's going to screw up. This, of course, set me off on a rampage, shouting angrily at everyone and clarifying that Chase and I were just peachy. But for some reason, I didn't think they believed me.

"We're doing fine," I answered with a sigh. "I don't see why everyone keeps asking me that. Why can't they go question Chase? It's like I'm the victim here and that Chase has absolutely nothing to do with it."

"Whoa, hun, settle down," Kris raised her hands, signaling defeat. "It was just a simple question. I like to hear that my friends are in good relationships, unlike me." Kris's facial expression immediately dropped and I knew she was thinking of Billie. A thought crossed my mind and I couldn't help but ask,

"Do you think you two will ever get back together?" Kris's head shot up, looking over at me, both confused and shocked that I had asked such a question. "I mean, since Billie apologized and you forgave him. It seems possible, if you get what I'm saying." Truth be told, I didn't want the two getting back together. Quite frankly, I liked Billie the way he was at this very moment. While he was with Kris, he wasn't the same, and I wasn't sure if Kris was the one to blame for that or if it was just Billie's pride getting the best of him. After coming to both of those assumptions, I concluded that I just didn't want to know.

Kris shook her head after a moment of silence. "I don't think so. I mean, it's great and all that we've made up and can be friends, but I don't think it would ever be the same. Besides, I wasn't the nicest person around when I was with Billie; I think it'd just be worse if we got back together."

I could live with that answer.

I watched my feet the entire way up the hill. The hill actually wasn't that tall, but it sat just off to the side of the school, close enough to where we could hear the bell so we could get to class on time. For a moment there, I found myself falling into a world of my own, daydreaming like I usually did when I had nothing else better to do. My mind drifted off, wandering from school to life back home, to my friends to Chase, to relationships to Billie... the gist of my life at the given moment was nothing but uncertainty. Everything was so cluttered, almost like an untidy room where I couldn't find a single thing I was looking for.

I wasn't quite sure if I knew what I wanted. Sure, I loved being around Chase; he was such an amazing guy. But then there was Billie, almost standing off to the side, having less importance in my life, which saddened me and himself. I wanted him in my life, I wanted to be close to him and I wanted to be with him... well, not exactly be with him, per say, but I wanted to be around him more.

But for some reason, that just didn't seem like enough. We had made a good compromise, and he was giving me plenty of time to decide... so why did I feel like I had already made my decision?

"Oh, hey, Billie." I heard Kris's voice come from my right. I immediately snapped out of my daze, my brows furrowed in aggravation at what I had been previously thinking. I looked up to see those breathtaking green eyes staring back at me, almost smiling with how bright they were. I knew exactly why they were such a light shade of green, and I was hoping that no one else did. Billie smiled and nodded at Kris before looking over at me, his smile transforming into his trademark grin. Why was I blushing? I wanted to smack myself for doing so. Billie must've noticed this and his grin expanded.

"Spencer," he chuckled. "You're hair's all over the place." He stated, bringing his hands up to my hair, flicking a few strands back to their original positions. The wind was blowing a little too hard for my liking, and I had to pull my hoodie even closer to me so my teeth didn't chatter.

"This is California," I mumbled, groaning inwardly. "It's not supposed to be so fucking cold." Kris giggled and Billie laughed as we walked over to the tree, Billie slipping his hand around my waist, going unnoticed by the others that looked up to greet us from their spots on the ground. I would've pushed Billie's hand away at any other time, but I was just too cold to bother.

"Cold?" Billie taunted, smirking all the while. I glared at him and tried pulling myself away.

"Well, if you're going to be like that..." He pulled me back to his side, keeping a firm grip around me.

"No, you're staying right here." He said firmly, rubbing my side affectionately when no one was looking. I sighed and shivered again. Blasted cold weather.

"Right, well, if you don't mind," I began, noticing Chase come running over to us, something in each of his hands. "I'm going to go over to my boyfriend, if it's all the same to you." Billie seemed to twitch upon hearing "boyfriend", but nodded anyways and reluctantly let me go. I made my way over to Chase, shivering the whole way, and he immediately pulled me into his embrace.

"I'm so sorry I didn't call this weekend! My brother came into town and wanted to spend time with the family so we were forced to go to Oakland for the entire weekend and I didn't get the chance to grab a phone—well, I did once, but my mom scolded me for trying to make a call while we were at some sort of show. So, to make it up to you, I bought you some cheetos at one of the vending machines since you love them so much." Chase finished his ramble, breathing heavily after speaking so fast. I laughed and took the bag of cheetos from him, giving him a swift kiss on the cheek.

"Aww, thank you! That was very sweet..." He wrapped his arms around my cold upper body and pulled it against his, running his fingers through my hair. I winced, not really sure why, but I winced. And I continued to wince until we finally broke apart, but with his fingers intertwined in mine. Billie's hand fit perfectly around yours, don't try to deny it... I brushed the thought aside and walked back to the tree, still freezing my ass off.

"Hey you two," said Mike, grinning over at us, mainly me. I raised my eyebrows at him, titling my head to the side as if asking why he was grinning at me. He looked around me and I turned around to see Billie standing there, also grinning. I glared, not understanding why the two were grinning. Chase went over to Bobby and the others for a while, leaving me between the two grinning teenage males. "Billie's checking you out, Spence." Mike then smirked as I quickly turned around again, Billie trying to look innocent.

"Stop that." I hissed firmly, walking over to him.

His grin expanded. "Can't help it." He murmured, his grin transforming into a soft smile, which I couldn't help but return. He turned me around and placed his hand on the small of my back before leading me over to Mike who was currently sitting all alone. Billie sat down, pulling me down with him, causing me to fall into his lap. "Ooh, I like this position."

I quickly jumped off of him as if he were on fire. Mike watched Billie and myself, almost like he knew something we didn't. Billie glanced around quickly to see Chase running after Ryan, the both of them disappearing behind the building. Billie turned back to face me, grinning like an idiot before leaning forward as fast as he could, capturing my lips in a quick kiss—more like a soft peck—before going back to his original position. Mike's jaw dropped, for once looking speechless and I blushed before smacking Billie on the arm. "OUCH!" he nursed his arm, scowling playfully at me. While Billie rubbed his arm, he looked over at Mike who's eyes were as wide as dinner plates. "You okay, man?"

Mike choked, and cleared his throat before croaking, "Yeah. Fine." Mike made a quick excuse to probably get away from us, leaving me alone with Billie. I glanced at the guitarist who was now smirking.

"Why'd you do that in front of Mike?!" I asked harshly, only getting a smirk and a simple shrug in return. I sighed, rolling my eyes, and stood from my spot, wanting to go look for Chase who still hadn't returned from scaring Ryan to death. I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist, pushing me into the tree. I gasped and glared at Billie. "Stop it right now! I have a boyfriend who will see you!" The two of us suddenly got wrapped up in a staring contest, both zoning out and not paying attention to anything around us. I think we were trying to see who could last the longest without blinking, I wasn't quite sure.

After a moment, I couldn't take it any longer and had to blink, causing Billie to laugh and point at me. I stuck my tongue out at him, and he leaned in closer as if trying to bite it. I laughed and pushed him away. Billie, however, was much stronger than me and kept a firm grip on my waist. That breathtaking smile of his returned to his lips while his eyes turned an even brighter shade of green. Apparently not one for giving up, he leaned forward again. I swiftly put my hand over his mouth, pushing his face back to a suitable distance.

"I have a fucking boyfriend—"

"The bell already rang." said Billie softly, still smiling at me. It did? I didn't even hear it! I looked around and, sure enough, no one else was out there. I groaned angrily and glared at Billie for making me late. This didn't seem to phase him and he leaned forward again, this time succeeding, and bit my lower lip. "No one's going to see us, Spence, don't worry."

"But it's still cheating!" I complained, trying to look away, yet failing to do so. Billie didn't answer, and instead claimed my lips, brushing them softly with his own and I sighed almost dreamily. You love the feeling of his lips up against yours... For once I listened and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer to me; his hips being pulled into mine and our chests touching. His grip around me tightened, and he stuffed his hands in the back pockets of my jeans, pushing my hips more against his own, and I moaned in his mouth.

This is so wrong!

How do you figure that? You like Billie much more than you like Chase... this is the most logical thing you've done since you started a relationship with that boy...

... But this is still cheating! It's wrong to cheat!

He removed his lips from my own, and I wanted to scream at him for doing so. He trailed them down my jaw line and across my chin before dipping down into my neck, leaving whispers of kisses along my collarbone and upward to my pulse. His warm breath hit my neck, sending chills all throughout my body... I had never felt this good before. Not once. And I didn't want this bliss to end. But sadly, all good thing must come to an end at some point...

"Hey, what are you two doing out here?" Billie pulled away from me to see a man who looked like he worked at the school, scowling at the two of us with an "I caught you, you're busted" look on his face.

"Shit, come on!" Billie grabbed my hand, giving me a chance to grip the top of my bag before running down the hill and across the street. I stopped as soon as the school was out of sight, doubling over to regain my breath while Billie took a seat on one of the benches.

"What was that?!" I asked, irritated. "I need to get to class! I'm already late enough!"

"Exactly," Billie then said right after I finished my statement. "So there's no point in going back anyways. We already got caught by a fucking teacher." He ran a hand through his hair and I took the time to notice how flushed he looked, me probably looking the same, if not more. "You've got to admit, though," began Billie again, standing from his spot to walk over to where I was leaning up against a fence. "That was pretty fucking fun." Needless to say, I didn't see anything fun about the situation at all.

I continued to stand there, frowning at how I was probably going to get in trouble by Reese since she was supposed to be staying home that day. Billie noticing the dirty look I was giving him and sighed, placing his hands on my upper arms, rubbing them slightly to warm me up while he spoke, "Spence, c'mon, you've skipped school before. Don't get all pissy now."

I shook my head, "I'm not pissed at you. I'm just... worried about what my step-mother's going to say when she finds out... she's not the best person to piss off, after all, I don't know what she'll do to me..." I trailed off, imaging her grounding me to my room without any dinner that night while she turned my own father against me.

"Babe, don't worry about that right now. Let's just go out and spend some time together since there's nothing else to do." I sighed and reluctantly agreed. There really wasn't anything else we could do, so what could a day off hurt? Other than Reese's reaction when she got a call from the school, of course. I tried not to think about what would happen once I got home. "We can drop our things off at my place before we go. No one's going to be home anyways; mom's at work." I just nodded and followed him back to his house that thankfully wasn't far.

When we got to his house, he dropped his books off on the couch. I figured since he put his there, I could put mine there as well and did so. He ran upstairs and said he'd be right back. I took a seat on the couch and just looked around, not have been able to get a look at it any times before. There were family portraits hanging on the walls in a straight line, some of which were from Billie's much younger years when his father was still around. I smiled softly at the pictures of them, how Billie looked so much like his father.

I thought back on everything that Billie had gone through, and how many things he had accomplished... I knew his father would be proud of him. And Billie wouldn't have been who he was to that day if his father wasn't around as long as he had been.

I looked at the other pictures mounted above the fireplace. I had actually never met Billie's brothers and sisters before; Anna, Holly, Marci, David and Alan. I heard they would be coming out for Christmas, so I was in all hopes that I'd be able to meet them during their visit.

Moments later, Billie returned, wearing a black hat backwards, but keeping everything else the same: a black thin jacket, a black shirt and even black baggy pants with his old chucks and, of course, his chained necklace that held one of his most prized guitar picks.

"Okay, let's go." He said, ushering me out the door. I laughed at how eager he was to get out of the house. He had his keys in his hands and I took a wild guess in saying he was going to be driving us to... well, to wherever we were going. Speaking of that...

"Billie, where are we going?" I asked as the both of us got in the car. He started the car and pulled out of the driveway.

"I was thinking Pier 45 in San Francisco. Sound good?"

As amazing as that sounded, it was freezing outside and I wasn't too keen on catching a cold right before Christmas. It seemed like some sort of tradition: every year during Christmas, I got sick. Why? Because the world's against me, that's why. That and I have the worst luck known to mankind. "But it's freezing!"

Billie chuckled and rested his hand on my thigh, drumming his fingers on it every now and then. "Don't worry, we won't be there too long. There's not too much to do there in November."

* * * *

And in reality, there really wasn't much to do once we got there. It was still a big tourist attraction and tons of people were there, even at such an early hour, but all in all I figured there must've been more set up during the summer or maybe even the spring. Billie had managed to talk me into going into one of the photo booths with him and we wasted multiple strips in the process. We got some ice cream cones and sat near the docks—me freezing my ass off the entire time with Billie trying to warm me—and we also played a few games like you would at a town carnival.

It was already 3:45 when we had played the last bit of games, it taking us about 2 and a half hours to drive there in the first place. School had gotten out a little over an hour ago and I was already dreading what my step-mother was going to do. I had tried not thinking about it through the duration of our "trip", but now that we were getting ready to head back, I wanted nothing more than to stay out a little later.

Out of nowhere, my cell phone began to ring and I jumped, dropping my nearly finished ice cream cone on the wooden docks we had been walking on. While Billie laughed at me and finished his own ice cream cone, I took out my cell phone and answered it.

"Hello?"

"What happened to you today?" It was Chase and I sighed with relief, glad that it wasn't my father.

"Oh, um..." I glanced over at Billie who had been eyeing me intently, knowing that it was Chase who called. Apparently Billie was very curious as to what I was going to tell Chase. Lie or don't lie, lie or don't lie... "I wasn't feeling good from the cold weather and went home early." Lie it is, then. I mentally smacked myself for lying to my own boyfriend.

"Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie... I hope you feel better soon. I missed you today." That made me feel even more guilty. Billie noticed the pained look on my face and put a hand on my shoulder for comfort.

"Yeah, I'll probably be there tomorrow." I continued to frown, not liking the fact that I had just lied to my own boyfriend and the fact that he could find out somehow that I was out with Billie the entire day. Oh, what a sight that would be.

"Alright, well, I need to get off here. I'll see you tomorrow, right?" I nodded to myself before remembering I was on the phone.

"Yeah, tomorrow. Right." We exchanged our goodbyes before I quickly hung up the phone, wincing at what a horrible person I felt like I was. Billie nudged me in the arm to get my attention and I shyly looked up into those green eyes of his, sighing. "I just lied to my own boyfriend..." I muttered, hanging my head again. Billie sighed as well before wrapping his arms around me, rubbing my back soothingly.

"It's okay, don't worry about it... it's only one lie, it's not as bad as it seems..." Maybe he was right, maybe I was just overreacting. But I hardly ever lied to anyone and this was just hitting me hard like I had been slapped across the face.

Not a minute later, my cell phone rang again. I took it out of my hoodie pocket for the second time and answered it again with a tentative, "Hello?"

"So where were you really at today?" came Mike's voice on the other line. I released the breath I had been holding, fearing it was going to be my father again. I furrowed my eyebrows, confused. "Chase told us he called you and that you went home sick. Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't really think people kiss their friends while they're sick." I could just hear the smirk in his voice and I so very badly wanted to smack him for it.

Sighing, I admitted, "We're at Pier 45 in San Francisco."

Mike chuckled. "I figured you two ran off somewhere for the day." I nodded to myself, not quite sure how to respond to that. "Well, are you two coming tomorrow? Or are you going to find something else to do instead?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, we'll be there tomorrow. And hey, listen, I've got to go, Billie's going to drive me home now. I'll talk to you tomorrow, okay?"

"Yeah, yeah, okay... I'm going to want a good explanation as to why Billie kissed you tomorrow, got it?" I reluctantly agreed and hung up the phone. Thinking of something, I took my phone back out and turned it off, just in case someone else felt the need to call and interrogate me. I looked up from where my eyes had connected with my shoes to see Billie smirking at me. How many times had he done that to me that day?

"What?" I asked, eyeing him suspiciously. He shrugged nonchalantly.

"Nothing. Just listening to what Mike said." Billie grinned, walking over to me as I blushed, though I had no reason to. He wrapped his arms around me again and kissed me softly before running his fingers through my hair. After all that I had done with the boy, I just let the kisses slide... the damage was already done, even though I still felt guilty as hell about it. I knew, even though I didn't want to admit it aloud just yet, that I liked Billie much more than a friend... much more than I liked Chase.

I had taken the time to admit it to myself that day, now all I had to do was admit it to everyone else.