Double Crossed

The sun shines overhead as a gentle breeze continuously blows threw the air. It’s dim outside, but still light enough for everyone to see. I’m sitting on Tay’s lap while Alex sits in the chair next to us. He passes each of us a beer, sighing as he opens his.

Before any of us can say anything Vic comes bounding over to us, plopping on the ground and throwing his head down. Kellin walks over slower, laying down with his head on Vic’s stomach.
“Hey guys,” Kellin says, waving lightly. Vic doesn’t say anything, just grunts.

“Where have you been?” Tay asks from beneath me, throwing her beer cap at Vic. Vic sighs loudly and Kellin just raises his eyebrows.

“Kellin made us go out shopping. For hours.”

“It was not hours!” Kellin yells, looking at us, “Went to like three stores, Vic is just a baby.”

“It was at least five,” Vic mutters, only to get elbowed by Kellin. Kellin mutters a quiet no it wasn’t, causing Alex to chuckle.

“You guys sound like an old married couple,” he says, smiling at them.

“We might as well be,” Vic says, reaching down to pet some of Kellin’s hair. Kellin just huffs, elbowing Vic again.

“Don’t act like being married to me would be such a bad thing,” Kellin says, turning on his side to look at Vic.

“Never, never,” Vic mutters, pushing hair out of Kellin’s face.

“Please don’t act like them when you guys get married,” Alex says, smiling at us. Tay wraps her arms tight around me, resting her chin on my shoulder.

“How could I ever be like that with Jen?” Tay asks, leaning over to peck me on the cheek. I nestle my head against hers. Before I get the chance to say anything Jack comes running over, a goofy grin on his face.

“Hey Alex, Ashley’s here,” he pauses, before looking over to wink at Tay and me, “and she brought a very attractive friend with her that I think you should introduce me to.”

“Yeah, come on Jacky,” Alex says, rolling his eyes and standing up. Tay looks over, pushing some of my hair out of the way. She squints her eyes, trying to make out who Ashley’s friend is.

“Who’d you say she was with?” Tay asks, rubbing my thighs lightly.

“Don’t know; some chick with black hair,” Jack shrugs, leaping towards them. Tay shifts slightly, craning her head further to see.

“Is that...” she gasps lightly, then all but throws me on the ground. I shuffle and catch myself before I actually fall, staring at her with raised eyebrows. “That’s Angela!” she says, before running to catch up with Alex and Jack, walking with them towards her.

“Who’s Angela?” Kellin says, lifting his head enough to look at me. I shrug and sit back down, playing with my fingers. I know Kellin is still looking at me, but I can’t bring myself to look up. “You okay?”

“Peachy,” I say, with my best smile. When I look up Alex, Jack and Ashley are no longer with Tay and Angela, instead Alex and Ashley are in the corner while Jack is off probably hitting on someone. Tay stands in front of Angela, hip popped to the side with her hand on it. I watch them for a few seconds, taking in how they’re acting. When Angela reaches over to rub up and down Tay’s arm, I shoot up, angrily making my way to them. When I get to them I slide my arm around Tay’s waist, roughly pulling her towards me. She doesn’t notice, though, she just smiles. I look at her and lean in to kiss her on the cheek. When we face forward Angela is looking at us, with raised eyebrows.
“And who is this?” she asks in a tone that should seem nice. I pull Tay closer to me, just a bit. But she squirms away, pulling herself out of my grip, huffing lightly.

“This is Jenna...” Tay says, looking between Angela and me as she trails off, “My girlfriend.”

“Fiancé,” I correct quickly, glaring at my shoes.

“Oh?” Angela questions, looking between the two of us. Tay seems to shuffle from me a bit, kicking her shoes into the dirt.

“Yep,” she replies, looking anywhere but either of us. I shrug it off, just wanting her to look at me.

“So how did you guys meet?” Angela asks, with a smile that doesn’t quite sit right with me.

“Well-” I begin.

“She doesn’t want to hear that stupid story,” Tay cuts me off, looking at Angela instead of me.

“She asked,” I say, though much quieter this time.

“Well it’s really not necessary,” she says again, this time more forcefully.

“Well if it’s no problem I-” Angela begins, but is also cut off by Tay.

“Why don’t you go hang out with Kellin and Vic?” she asks, looking me in the eye for the first time since I got over there.

“Yeah, okay,” I mutter, my eyes sting though they don’t feel glossy. I shut up after that, excusing myself, though neither seem to notice. I make my way to the front of the house, easily finding my car. I open the back seat, lifting the seat and grabbing my cigarettes and lighter. I slide onto the hood of the car, pushing myself onto the very top. Pulling out a cigarette I light it, bringing it to my lips and taking a long drag. I don’t want to think about Tay or how weird she’s acting. Instead I focus on the way the smoke floats upward, disappearing into a million little pieces. The moment it quiet and short lived. Before I even notice he’s there, Kellin slides onto the roof of my car, sitting cross legged next to me.

“Bum me one?” he asks, looking at me. Instead I just pass him mine, watching him pull in and out. When he passes it back I stare at him a moment, before breathing in again.

“Didn’t know you smoked,” I say, watching as he cracks a grin.

“Some of us are better at hiding it,” he says. “I try not to answer the phone while I’m doing it though,” he laughs.

“He told you?” I chuckle, passing it to him. Kellin nods, laughing a little.

“He told everyone but Tay. Him and Vic are all worried; trying to make plans to get you to stop,” he says.

“Does Vic know you smoke?” I ask raising my eyebrows. He mimics my expression.

“Does Tay know?” he asks. I just shrug, “Some things they don’t need to know; it just worries them.” And he’s got a point; why bother them with everything that’s wrong with me when I can just go out and relax?

“So what’s got you all riled up?” Kellin asks, scooting closer to me. I shrug and look down. “I saw you with them, Jen. I saw the way she pushed you off.”

“It was nothing,” I mutter, shifting uncomfortably. Kellin sighs and wraps his arm around me, pulling me closer.

“It was something if it’s got you out here all alone,” he says, and for some reason it makes me feel incredibly small. Like I am one single ant living in this universe; insignificant and useless. “You know she loves you, right?” I nod, twisting the ring on my finger. “She’s just being weird, she’ll get over it.”

“Of course,” I say, turning to look at him, “You think I feel threatened by that...girl?” I ask, letting out a fake laugh.

“And you know I love you too right?” he asks, ignoring my question, “And Vic. So...if anything does happen, please come to us for help. You’ve always got a place with us.”

“Nothing will happen,” I say, scooting closer to him. He wraps both of his arms around my waist.

“Nothing,” he repeats. For a while we don’t say anything, just pass the cigarette and wait for this stupid party to end.