Paper Cranes

BEFORE THE GAME TYLER HAD dropped a jersey off at the front desk of the hospital along with a small bouquet of flowers perfectly arranged in a mason jar. I’m sure the look in my eyes and the goofy smile on my face explained the whole situation to the woman behind the desk. Her eyes glittered and she smiled sweetly at me, her hand quickly writing out a pass to my sister’s room.

“He’s a keeper, a cute one too.” She whispered as she handed me the badge and then nodded in the direction of the elevator. Nodding in response to her, my cheeks heated up to a deep red as I bid her a goodnight and stumbled over to the elevator where I hit the up arrow and then smiled to myself, my eyes dancing around the pink roses that were decorated with white flowers and then a red rose in the middle.

By the time I reached Shelby’s floor, I was about to squeal from all of the happiness that was swelling in my stomach My eyes were wider than normal and bright as I walked out of the elevator and nearly jobbed over to her door that was halfway shut. As I pushed it over with my foot, her small voice filled the air and before I could comprehend her small arms were wrapped around me.

“I’m so excited, so, so, so… Oh my gosh!” Her small eyes widened to the size of saucers as she grabbed my hand and lowered the flowers to her eye level. “I know who got you those flowers! I know exactly who got you those flowers- Oh!” Her small hands roughly pulled a small white card out from the bouquet and ripped the envelope off of it. As the small piece of paper with my name scribbled on it fell to the floor, I gasped and quickly set the things down in my hand before I ran over to her and snatched the little card from her now devilishly smiling face.

Hey Len, hope you and Shell have fun watching the game! I’ll score one for ya’. – Love Tyler.

“He wrote love?” I whispered, the smile that was once stretched across my face shrinking.

“He wrote love!” Shelby cheered, her thin body jumping up on her bed, making the machines that were tucked away next to it rattled from the sudden and dramatic movements. “He wrote love! Love, love, love!” Shelby cheered as she kept jumping on her bed, her tiny fists pumping in the air.

Inhaling slowly, I blinked a few times before I pulled my eyes from the card and glanced over at the small table where I had set the flowers and the jersey down. Unlike Shelby’s jersey, the back of the jersey Tyler had left for me was bare from any name or numbers. It was just the normal deep green of the jersey.

Before I could inform Shelby that jumping up and down on her bed was probably extremely dangerous, there were footsteps in the room and Shelby squealed with laughter as her small body was lightly tossed onto the bed, her head falling into her pillows as her thin locks of hair flew into her eyes. “Hey! No fair!” She giggled as the boy quickly grabbed her sides, making her squeal with laughter as she kicked her feet and shook her head.

“Hey, Lennon.” The male voice managed to knock me out of my thoughts as I turned to him, our eyes connecting almost instantly.

“Hey Jake, thanks for taming my sister”, we shared a laugh as he walked over to me, his eyes scanning over the flowers and jersey that were tossed on the table. When his eyes fell on the little card in my hands, he looked in the opposite direction and nodded a little, his eyes finally resting on the television screen, the pregame for the Dallas Stars running across the screen.

Clearing his throat, Jake looked back at me, his green eyes piercing through my own. “Pretty serious between you and him, huh?”

“Not that I know of.” I whispered as blood started to rush to my cheeks. “I mean, I hardly call dinner and flowers serious.”

“For him I’m sure it is.” He mumbled to himself and then nodded and straightened his back. Forcing a smile onto his lips, he looked back into my eyes and nodded. “I have to go check on the other kiddies. I’m on duty most of the night so let me know if you guys need anything, alright?” His voice was almost mechanical, like he was reciting words from a script. It wasn’t Jake the friend, it was suddenly Jake the nurse, and it immediately got under my skin.

With a nod and a small thank you, I watched Jake walk out of the room and then quickly walked over to the table and slipped the Jersey over my button up shirt I had on. Adjusting it a little so it sat comfortably on my shoulders, I walked over to Shelby’s bed and watched as she scooted over, taking the remote and turning the volume up on the television.

Through the practice and the interviews, Shelby and I chatted about the game, how nice it was to be watching one together again, and how odd it was that Tyler gave me a jersey without a name on the back of it. At the end of the small half hour preview of the game, when Tyler wasn’t interviewed, Shelby huffed and crossed her little arms tightly across her chest, mumbling about how dumb people were because you don’t do a pre-game show without interviewing the best player.

“I’m sure they’ll interview him once the game it over, Shell.” I smiled down at her as she rolled her eyes and then looked up at me, the fake-angry expression fading away.

“Hey Lenny, can I ask you something?” her voice was soft as her wide eyes caught mine, making the smile wipe from my face. Whenever she was serious, it scared me. Often times I forgot that my little sister was terminally ill with cancer, and it was moments like these that brought that back into reality. Swallowing hard, I nodded and looked down at her, my arm instinctively finding its way around her shoulders. “Do you like Tyler too?”

“Yeah”, I laughed, a weight lifting from my shoulders.

“Does he make you happy?” She asked, her eyes meeting mine. As I looked at her, I smiled wide and nodded, pulling her into a hug.

“He makes me really happy, Shel. What’s this all about?”

“I just want to make sure you’re happy, Lenny.” She responded with a large smile and then turned her attention back to the television where the announced was leaning against the bunch, a familiar face topped with messy brown tuffs of hair lazily leaning next to him.

As we both noticed that they were interviewing Tyler, we squealed almost simultaneously and Shelby quickly launched herself onto the remote and hit the volume button until it wouldn’t go anymore. Once the volume was unbearably loud, we leaned over a little, out eyes focused as the announcer asked Tyler a few questions about their game and how they were going to go about playing the L.A Kings.

Once the interview was done, Tyler looked off into the camera and gave the world a wink before skating back off into the small warm up before the game officially started. As his wink replayed in my mind, I listened as Shelby started to rant on and on about how that wink was probably meant for us, how Tyler knew we were watching and that’s why he winked.

Nodding along with her theories, we both leaned back into the pillows on the bed and started to watch the game, yelling at every bad call and cheering every time they scored.



The game had gone into a shootout and of course, the one and only Tyler Seguin scored the game-winning goal. As soon as I watched the little black puck slip under the goalies pads and cross the line, eventually stopping its movement against the back of the net, I threw my arms up, careful to not wake the sleeping girl on my stomach and wiggled my fingers in the air as a celebration.

As they panned to the crowd cheering and all of the Dallas Stars congratulating each other, especially Tyler, on the win, I felt my heart pump roughly in my chest. I was so proud, so happy, so caught up in the game that I had completely forgot where I was, who I was with, and why I was there.

Once the excitement of the win wore off, I sunk back down into the bed, careful not to wake the tiny girl on my side and reached over to grab the remote, turning the volume down to just above a whisper. Letting a yawn pass my lips, I grabbed my cell phone from my pocket and quickly informed my father that I was still at the hospital, the game had run late, and I was probably going to stay the night.

Hitting send and placing my phone onto the pale pink sheets beneath me, I went to shut my eyes when I heard a faint knock on the door that quickly pried my eyelids back open. “Can I come in?”

“Who is it?” I chuckled a little as Jake walked in, his eyebrow raised as a smirk played on his lips. As he walked into the room and looked over at the bed, a large smile surfaced on his lips as a soft chuckle flowed from his mouth. I had to give it to him, he was a good looking guy, with a great job, and an almost melodic laugh, it baffled me how he was still single.

“How was the game, champ?” He chuckled as he pulled the chair in the room over to the side of the bed and then sat down in it, carefully observing the girl lying on my stomach.

With a small nod, I let out a long yawn and looked over at him, some strands of hair still in my face. “It was great, Seguin won it in like the tenth round of the shootout. A little bummed Shelby missed it, but I know how tired she gets, so I thought it was best to let her sleep, right?”

“You’re the one who is going to be my boss, you tell me.” He smirked and laughed as I took my free hand and covered my face, a smile too wide to look normal flashing across the bottom portion of my face.

“Don’t be dumb, Jake.” I scoffed. “I still have like ten more years of school left, and I highly doubt that this hospital wants another Davis working here. They’re probably sick of us.”

Jake scoffed at this, straightening his back as he ran a hand through his short blonde hair. “You know that everyone in this damn hospital loves your family, right?” I watched him, trying to figure out if he was just saying that, or actually telling the truth. “You’re mother and father are absolutely brilliant. You’re sister is like a ball of sunshine who makes everyone smile, and you’re probably the smartest, sweetest, most beautiful girl that this place had ever seen. Whoever hires people here would be an idiot to not take another Davis as a doctor.”

I stared at Jake as he finished talking, a bright red blanket covering my cheeks as his words sunk down through my skull. ‘Beautiful?’ He thought I was beautiful? Did more people think this? No- it was probably him just being nice, trying to prove a point.

Shaking my head a little, I chuckled and then glanced over at him, his eyes glued to me. “Flattered honestly”, I hoped that he didn’t notice my hot cheeks, “How was the shift tonight? You’re almost done, aren’t you?”

“I am”, he smiled thankfully. “It was pretty rough, one of the kids isn’t doing so well, the ones in that hallway you never walk with me down. It hurts ya’ know, thinking about that kind of thing. I knew what I was getting myself into when I went to school for this and decided to work here, but now that I have to see it happen right before me and there’s nothing I can do, it makes me rethink my life choices.”

I looked at him for a minute, my wide smile quickly turning into a small frown. I wanted to ask him if he thought Shelby would end up in that hallway one day. I wanted to ask him who it was and if there was really nothing they could do. I wanted to run out of the room and down the hallway and try to help the kid, I wanted to do something, but I knew I couldn’t. Once cancer had made up it’s mind on what it wants to infect, how fast it wants to reproduce, and how large it wants to go, there’s no stopping it.

It was horrible thinking about the disease. Families and doctors try so hard, day after day, treatment after treatment to try to stop it. Surgeries and chemotherapy, all kinds of folk medicine and diet changes, anything and everything that could be a potential cure, it’s all a false hope. Everything that deals with cancer is a false hope, because no matter how you think you beat it, if always comes back.

Tears started to push against my eyes as I thought about the tiny girl on my stomach, the way that the cancer had taken her childhood away from her. How she was restrained to a hospital and couldn’t leave the huge building that smelled like bleach and other cleaners. Coughing, moaning and groaning, needles, medications and tests, that’s all she looked forward too.

Children weren’t supposed to worry about those things; they weren’t supposed to be around those things. They were supposed to color and make friends at school, go to dumb bowling birthday parties and petting zoos. They were supposed to have fun before reality and responsibility took over their lives.

I started to cry, small, light sobs, but they were loud enough for the boy sitting next to me to notice. Without any hesitation, Jake leaned over and wrapped his arms around me, letting my face fal into his shoulder as the tears started to push through my eyes. I was in silent hysterics as the small girl was still fast asleep next to me, her small body now lying in the bed, her head softly resting on a pillow as her tiny chest rose and fell with the light sleepy breathing.

“I can’t loose her, Jake. I don’t want to see her bedridden. I don’t want to visit her in that hallway, I can’t do it. She doesn’t deserve this Jake, why her, what did she ever do?”

“Hey.” Jake said sternly, his strong arms quickly pulling my body to my feet. As we stood there, my knees shaking beneath me, I looked up at him, my eyes drowning in tears as he pressed his lips into a thin line and shook his head slightly.

I knew for a fact that Jake and every other nurse in this wing hated when I cried over my sister like this. They didn’t hate the fact that I was crying, but they had informed me on several occasions that the fact I loved my sister so much and got so sad over this whole thing was what killed them. They gave me the speech about enjoying every day without thinking about what could happen in the long run, but it was hard too when every day she was getting worse and no one could change it.

“I don’t want to watch her die, Jake.”

“Lennon Davis you look at me right now.” Jake said in a stern yet soft voice. Nodding a little, I looked up at him and watched as his eyes caught mine. “You’re going to stop crying, and stop thinking like this, alright? You don’t deserve this, she doesn’t deserve this, no one on the planet deserves this, but things happen. You’re going to make it through this no matter what happens, okay? I’m not going to let you slip through the cracks. I’m not going to let Shelby’s cancer kill you too.”

Lip quivering I nodded a little and went to drop my eyes down when Jake swiftly pressed his lips to mine and then just as I realized what he did, he pulled away and took a step back, his fingertips falling from the tops of my shoulders. As the tingling sensation rushed through my face, my cheeks turning a bright red, my breath caught in my chest, and I looked at the man across from me, his eyes as wide and surprised as mine.

“Len I’m-“

“No. Just… No.” I mumbled and quickly walked away from him. Going over to my sister, I gave her a kiss on the forehead, and then quickly grabbed my things and headed out of the room, my heart racing as I listened Jake call my name out from behind me.

Feet heavily hitting the floor, I kept walking and shook my head every time Jake asked me to stop or wait up. I didn’t want to see him; I didn’t want to think about him. My lips were numb from his, and my body was filled to the brim with anger and guilt. Tyler and I weren’t official, but it wasn’t exactly a loose friendship.

I was out of the hospital in a matter of minutes. The time was unknown to me, but by the way the dark sky hung above the hospital, void of any stars, and the streetlights glowed in the night, I knew it must have been late.

Shivering a little as the cool night air hit me, tears started to rush down my face again. As I angrily pushed them away, I wandered through the parking lot, hitting the unlock button on my car as I sniffled loudly. About five minutes later, I heard the soft clicking of a car unlocking as soon as I hit the button on my keypad. Nodding a little to myself, I attached my eyes back to the asphalt and started to quickly walk in that direction, but halfway there my body collided with one that was moving much faster than mine.

“Oh shit, I’m so sorry I-“

The strong smell of men’s body wash and cologne filled my nose as I fell down onto the asphalt backwards, my butt hitting the gravel first as my back and head slowly followed after. Inhaling deeply as the pain rushed through me, I cracked my eyes open, tears still pouring form the edges, and looked up at the man who was kneeling next to me, his beautiful bright eyes locked onto mine.

“Tyler?” As soon as he nodded a little, I wrapped my arms around his neck and buried my face into his shoulder, letting the strong smells of his cologne fill my head and numb the pulsing in my brain. As a small sob rocked through my body, Tyler wrapped his arms around me and quickly scooped me up from the ground and placed me back on my feet.

Standing in the middle of the parking lot, Tyler held me tightly against his chest, not saying a single word as I created giant pools of tears in the soft fabric of his sweatshirt. As his strong hands rubbed soft circles on my back, I shook my head a little and took a long shaky inhale. As my mind started to clear, one thing about the night stuck out in my head, overpowering the other horrific incidents.

“You wrote love on your card.” I whispered, keeping my forehead against his chest.

“Hmm”, he hummed and then stopped rubbing my back and pulled me closer to his chest. “Yeah, I did, didn’t I?”

“Did you… Do you… Mean it?” I was too afraid to pull my face out of his strong chest and look at him in the eyes.

The silence between my question and his response was unbearable.

“Given that through the whole game, all I could think about was you and Shelby sitting in your jerseys watching me, I would have to say yes.” He whispered and then softly pulled me from him and looked into my eyes, a small smile forming on his lips. “If that’s okay with you, Doc.” He smirked as my nickname slipped through his teeth.

“Yeah”, I looked into his eyes and felt my heart melt into a puddle as all of the previous things I was crying about silenced in my head. “It’s fine.”