Hate Me

Cora stayed in her room for two days, after Odin slapped her. She was able to use magic to heal the cut on the bridge of her nose, but she couldn’t make the swelling around her cheek or upper lip go away. Two days of ice, cold water and rest, that’s what it took for the swelling to disappear. Cora casted a spell to keep everyone from entering her chambers, Frigga was worried and Thor was as well, but he learned over time to let Cora have time to herself. When Cora showed up to breakfast, Frigga and Xaven were overjoyed, Thor was pleased, but worried and Odin did not care at all. When breakfast was over Frigga demanded that Cora spend time with her to which Cora agreed.

Tucked away in Frigga chambers, the two woman talked about Cora’s visit with Loki. Cora was mindful to not mention Odin’s interruption and Frigga was overall pleased with what Cora told her. “Was he sad to see you go?” Frigga asks and Cora folds her hands in her lap, not meeting Frigga’s eyes. Cora knows that Loki was sad, but he was more angry then anything. “What did he say? Will he write?”

“I do not know. Loki would not speak much of the feature, he only focused on right then and there,” Cora tells Frigga and Frigga nods her head understanding. “Loki did enjoy the books, he told me to send along his gratitude.” The news pleased Frigga greatly and Cora could tell from the way Frigga’s eyes light up. “My Queen?”

“Yes?”

“Loki would not say…how long is he to be imprisoned?” Cora inquiries and the light fades from Frigga’s eyes.

Frigga reaches out and places a hand on top of Cora’s, “My dear, Loki’s attack on Jotunheim was grieves and his crimes against Midgard are ever more gruesome. By our laws, Loki was to be executed as soon as he stepped foot in the Bifrost…” Frigga notices the look of horror on Cora’s face and she smiles sadly. “As you can see that did not happen and Loki has been imprisoned. Loki is to be kept in the dungeons-”

“He will never touch me again will he?” Cora’s question is soft and coated thickly in sorrow as she interrupts the Queen. Frigga squeezes Cora’s hands and Cora slowly pulls her hands away before she stands up. “Forgive me, my Queen, but I must take my leave,” Cora says and she bows deeply before she hurries out of Frigga’s chamber. Frigga watches Cora’s retreating form and she sighs shaking her head.

“Poor girl,” she whispers.

~~~~~~

“Cora!” Stopping in her tracks, Cora slaps a smile on her face and turns, nearly being thrown off balance as Xaven runs into her legs. Smiling down at the little girl, Cora bends and picks her up, resting Xaven on her right hip. “I missed you,” Xaven states and wraps her arms tightly around Cora’s neck.

“I am sorry, little dove,” Cora whispers and presses a kiss to Xaven’s temple as she hugs her tightly. A shadows looms over Cora and when she picks her head up, she sees Thor standing in front of her. “My Prince,” Cora mummers and bows.

Thor rolls his eyes in response and pulls Cora into a tight hug, “You were missed, my friend,” Thor’s voice is true as he speaks and lets Cora go.

“Forgive me, my Prince?” Thor nods his head and wraps an arm around Cora’s shoulders.

“Walk with us?” Thor questions and Cora nods her head before she bends and sets Xaven on her feet. Cora shrugs Thor’s large arm off of her and Thor laughs, “Am I that bad?”

“You are sweating and my face is too close to your armpit, Thor,” Cora states and Thor chuckles.

“Forgive me, I tend to forget how small you are.” Cora says nothing in response and walks beside Thor while Xaven runs along in front of them. “I have started to court Lady Arana.” Thor’s sudden outburst startles Cora and she stares up at him with wide eyes. Thor glances down at Cora and raises his eye brows, “What?” Thor asks confused and Cora opens her mouth to speak, but stops. “Do you wish for me to stop?”

“N-no. It’s just very sudden that is all…when did this start?” Cora questions and Thor’s face twist up as he thinks.

“Not long, a week at the most,” Thor answers and Cora nods her head glancing at Xaven who has taken to chasing after a butterfly. “She will make a fine mother for Xaven.”

“Can you see yourself loving her?” Cora asks softly and Thor bites his lip. He claps his hands behind his back and slowly nods his head.

“…Yes. Not right away, for Sif will always have my heart, but in time I will grow to love Lady Arana. She is a kind woman and her humor is refreshing,” Thor admits and Cora is pleased with the news. “What of you?”

“Me?” Cora looks at Thor not understanding his question.

“You have reached the age of marriage and child baring…do you see yourself finding someone to call your own?” Thor explains and Cora looks down at the cobble path beneath her feet. “You are wonderful with Xaven, you would make a great mother.” Cora smiles bitterly at Thor’s words.

“I am okay on my own. I do not wish to share my bed with anyone…” Cora states and Thor frowns at her words.

“What about a children?”

“I was blessed to experience the joy of raising Xaven, I do not need any others-”

“You do not wish for a child of your own?” Thor presses and Cora picks her head up to look at him.

Thor stares into Cora’s eyes as she speaks, “Not ever wish is granted.” Thor opens his mouth to comment, but Cora shakes her head and places her hand on his bicep, “I am okay with that, Thor. I am content with the life I live and I am blessed for those who are in it. I do not need a husband nor do I need a child. I am content with how things are now.” Thor sees the pain in Cora’s eyes and he can hear the lies behind her words.

“Daddy!” Xaven shouts, her voice pulling the two adults from their conversation. Thor looks in front of him and Xaven is standing under a tree pointing to the fruit it bears.

Thor looks down at Cora and Cora gives him a light shove, “Are you really okay?” Thor questions and Cora smiles.

“Daddy!” Xaven wines.

“It doesn’t matter,” Cora whispers and pushes Thor towards Xaven. Thor sighs and purses his lips, “Go.” Thor runs off to help Xaven pick apples. With a quite sigh, Cora continues to walk, not rushing to reach Thor and Xaven. Cora thinks over Thor’s words and she smiles sadly to herself, the only man she wishes to bore children for is locked away and he is to stay locked away until the day he dies. Cora’s heart beats painfully and she bites her lip as the thought of never seeing Loki again sinks in. Looking at Thor and Xaven, Cora stops walking, their happiness is too much right now. With a flick of her wrist, Cora disappears and reappears in her room. Clutching at her chest, Cora stumbles to her bed chamber and drops down on her bed. She can feel her heart breaking, it’s being torn apart and lite on fire. Cora groans, rolling over onto her side, curling herself into a ball.

Her eyes sting and it becomes a harder to breath. A stuttered sob slips pass Cora’s lip and the tears fall. She’s not okay, she lied. She wants someone to share her bed with, she wants to be a mother, but she doesn’t want just anyone. Cora wants Loki, she wants the one man that she knows she can never have. Cora knows that she should try to get over Loki that she could give other men a chance, but she can’t. She loves Loki and sadly she always will. It would be so easy to move on if she hated him or he hated her, but that’s not the case. “Why can’t he just hate me?” Cora cries. As the words left Cora’s mouth she made a silent vow to herself. If all Cora can do is love Loki, then she will try to love another just like Thor is trying with Lady Arana.