A New Life

While everyone else pilled into various black SUVs Willa and myself waited for another drive to bring up one of my uncles cars that had Willa’s car seat in it. I was almost thankful we wouldn’t be riding with everyone else, too many people, and too much talking. Harry must have noticed we were hanging back but I didn’t notice him waiting on us until he spoke,

“Aren’t you riding with us?” He said.

“Oh, um, no. Willa’s car sear is in my uncles Range Rover so one of the drivers was just going to take us in that instead of the trouble of having to take it out then someone be squished next to it. We will see guys there though.” I tried to give him a nice smile but he just made me so nervous. He look almost upset as he gave me this deep frown, its like he wasn’t pleased with that answer.

“Well, how about I ride with you guys then, it will be even less cramped and we can talk about the aquarium.” He smiled so bright with dimples like it was the best idea he had ever had.

In my head I was thinking of an excuse but before I could, Willa was practically jumping out of my arms at Harry, screaming “yes mom, let my friend ride wiff us.” and well I sure as hell couldn’t say no to that.

The car finally rolled around before I could even blink, Harry was opening the back door and buckling my little blonde baby in her seat.

This man might just kill me, I thought to myself.

The whole way to the restaurant, it was like the Willa and Harry show. They sang along to the radio, talked about the fish they were excited to see and Harry even let her wear his hat. I could have physically swooned as I tried not to stare and busied myself with my phone.

About half way through the 20 minute or so ride Layla texted me asking why Harry had rode with us and insisting that Harry MUST have a thing for me. I completely ignored her and just watched out the window.

When we arrived at the restaurant Layla was in full flirt mode but rush towards me with hushed questions, which I waved off and told her we would talk later. I walked to the back door to get Willa out but as soon as I turned around, I found her already out and in Harrys arms.

“Oh, thank you for getting her out, and keeping her occupied on the ride here. You really didn’t have to sit in the back.”
“No thank you is needed, I had a great time back there. She is a smart little girl."

"Thank you." I smiled at him.

“Mommy, can I sit next to my new friend?” Willa said as she bounced up and down in Harry‘s arms.

I watched as he smiled at her, and it nearly made me sick to my stomach. Why had he taken such inertest in her? Why couldn’t all guys be like this as soon as they meet her? This was all so confusing.

I looked at them and they looked back at me excitedly.

“You sure can baby, as long as I can sit on the other side you and it is okay with him.” I told her.
She looked at him with hopeful.

“You can only sit next to me if I can help you with you activity book.” Harry smiled at my three year old as her face lit up at the idea as she shook her head enthusiastically and my heart completely melted.

I loved it when she interacted with guys that weren’t already in her life like my papa or her uncle or even my friend Madison’s brother. I even had always refrained from putting her in daycare or preschool because I knew she would start to wonder why she had only a mommy but no daddy. I knew the day would be coming soon any way and I can only hope that I am ready to explain to her and help her understand that every family is different.

We all started walking inside, Harry had put Willa down but was now holding her hand. I walked behind them watching. I needed to snap out of this before I let my thinking go to far but it was so hard.

We all got seated, they put a chair with a booster seat on the end for Willa and true to his word Harry sat next to her on one side of the table and I sat on the other side. As the waiter came around got everyone’s drinks, I watched Harry and Willa color on the little paper menu they gave her.

“Ma’am?” The waitress said to me. She was an older woman probably no older than my mom and she smiled sweetly at me as she caught me staring at my girl and Harry interact.

“Oh I’m sorry. Ill have a water and sprite for her.” I smiled back at her.

“Okay, and for you Sir?” She turned towards Harry.

“I will have a water as well.”

“Your daughter is so beautiful, you guys did a great job.” she said as she looked in between Harry and I.

I opened my mouth to protest and tell her nicely that she was just mine but thank you but before I could Harry spoke up.

“Thank you.” He said simply with a smile on his face, she smiled back and walked away to get our drinks.

I could sense Harry was about to say something but before he could, I excused myself to go to the bathroom. I got up quickly and I could sense his eyes as he watched me walk away.

There was a chair in the ladies room so I sat there and tried not to cry. Why would he think it would be okay to do that? I knew he didn’t know I was as damages as I was but he had to know I had be hurt. I was 18 raising a 3 year old for crying out loud. I must have been in there longer than I thought because Layla texted me telling me she had ordered me a chicken Cesar salad. I finally composed myself and walked out and back to the table.

When I reached it, I quickly bent down and kissed the top of Willa head. She looked up and grinned at me.

“Momma, Harwy order my food for me, and I got da chicken fingers!” She told me excitedly.

“He did, did he? Well, that was very nice of him. Did you tell him thank you.”
She nodded her head at me. I could feel Harry’s eyes nearly burning a hole in the side of my face but he said nothing.

“Is everything okay?” Layla said as she leaned over and whispered in my ear.

I just looked at her and she knew that no it wasn’t but we would talk about it later. She nodded her head before returning to her conversation.

After a few minutes, I decided that could not be a complete bitch and remain quite the entire lunch because, well lets be honest my dad would kill me for being rude to clients. When finally came around and learned everyones names and even had some small conversations. We ate out food, chatted, paid, then headed out.

We all stood outside the restaurant, and much to my surprise there was a lot less flashing camera and paparazzi than I thought there would be.

I stood there holding Willa’s hand trying to think of a way to get out of going the aquarium so I would have to spend time with Harry any longer than I had to. Because if I couldn’t get away from him, my brain would start coming up with some crazy ideas about how he might actually like me and I didn’t want to put myself through that. But before I had the chance to tell Willa we would go maybe tomorrow she spoke up.

“Mommy, are we still going to see the fishies?” Willa asked looking up at me with hopeful eyes.

“I don’t know baby, I think you might need a nap.” I wasn’t lying, she was tired and rubbing her eyes but I knew she could make it.

“PWEASSSE Mommy!” I knew she wasn’t going to give up and I was determined to get away from Harry but before I could stand my ground..

“Yeah pweasssse mommy.” Harry had picked Willa up and they made the same pouty face. One stupid look was all it took for me to cave and my heart to flutter. What the fuck is this boy doing to me?

“Fine, fine but you better behave.” They did some cheering and a little dance in victory.

“Dad, we are going to the aquarium. Harry is coming, do we need someone to go with us?” I knew the drill. On occasion I would become friends with my dads clients and when we went out most of the time guards came. It wasn’t even weird to me anymore.

“Uh, probably just one to be safe, I love you sweetie.” He kissed me on the cheek. He knew something was up with but could tell what but if I am being honest I didn’t even know what was up.

“I love you too Dad, we will talk later.” He nodded in response and I made my way back over to Willa and Harry a guard in tow.

When I reached them Harry was spinning around with her high above his head. She giggles and screamed while my heart fluttered to see her so happy. She was happy with just me and my mom but I could tell that sometimes she needed something more, that she could tell something was missing from her life.

I stood back and smiled as Layla bumped me on the hip and gave me the all knowing look before heading back to car to flirt some more.

“Are you guys ready?” Willa nodded her head excitedly as Harry set her on the ground.

It was a short distance between the restaurant and the aquarium and it felt nice out so we decided to walk and come back for the car when we were done.

Willa was walking in between Harry and me; I was holding her hand when all the sudden she reached up and grabbed Harry’s as well. I looked over at him to see if it made him uncomfortable but he just looked down at his hand then at me and gave me a big goofy dimple filled smile. I could have swore my heart stopped.

I might just die today.